by Lexy Timms
“There ya go. Now. Tell me about the foundation. How’s stuff with all that going?”
Chapter 20
Hailey
Of course, he would be at the fucking diner with Drew. Of course, he would ask me to come over like nothing was wrong. He didn’t think I was onto him, but I was. It was no coincidence that he was over there the same afternoon that his two-faced bitch came stomping into my gallery. Maybe they were going to meet up after his fun little dinner with Drew, or maybe they were going to walk the beach after I left the gallery.
Either way, I sure as hell wasn’t having dinner with him.
I got into my car and took off down the road. I was ready to get home, sink myself into bed, and go the fuck to sleep. There was no way in this world Bryan didn’t know that woman. She knew intimate details about his life, about his tattoos on his body and his family’s cabin when John was still alive. She knew them. Both of them. And she knew about his work at the foundation.
There was no way that woman was lying about all of that. And even if she was, what the hell was her motive? Coming in there and making comments about my weight and how Bryan was going to leave me over it. Those were the tactics of an overconfident other woman. Someone Bryan might’ve fucked around with on one of our ‘off seasons’ or some shit. Maybe she was trying to wiggle her way back into his world by trying to shove me out by casting seeds of doubt that would rift us apart.
And if that was her plan, then it was fucking working.
My hands gripped the steering wheel as I raced home. I drove through my favorite fast food joint and decided to have at it tonight. No more fucking salads and fruit juices to try and keep my weight under control. It sure as hell wasn’t making a difference. I could taste a double bacon cheeseburger and cheese fries like it was right against my lips, and I was going to have it.
I drove through the drive-through and tossed caution to the wind. I got myself the burger I wanted piled high with all the bacon I knew I could handle. I supersized the cheese fries and got the most caffeinated soda they had. I drove home, my vision dripping red as I slammed out of my car.
I stalked into the kitchen and stood over the sink as I began to eat my food.
Grease and ketchup dripped against the stainless steel. I moaned with every bite I took, feeling my double-chin grow larger by the second. I swallowed bites so big it hurt going down, and I chugged my soda as I felt the glorious caffeine shoot through my veins. I felt alive. Ever since I’d gotten pregnant, I tried to follow everything by the book. I didn’t give into cravings, and I ate only fresh foods. I stayed away from caffeine altogether, and I started painting with paints that were nontoxic. Hell, I fucking switched out my deodorant and stopped dying my hair because I knew those chemicals were toxic for my growing child!
But not tonight.
Now, I’d had enough.
I’d had enough of being pregnant and not having control of my body. I’d had enough of the drama and the world crumbling around us. I wished we hadn’t come back from Europe. I wished we had stayed in Barcelona. I was ready to call Ramon up right now and hand-deliver those fucking paintings to him before planning another art tour that would keep me away for good. I could settle along the vineyards of Italy and drink and paint for the rest of my life. I could get fat off freshly-made pastas and wake up to freshly-baked pastries. I could grow as fat as I pleased and paint pictures for people who enjoyed my art until the day I passed from this earth.
“Hailey?”
Bryan’s voice pulled me from my thoughts as I swallowed the fries I was chewing.
“Can this wait?” I asked. “I’m eating.”
“Are you okay?” he asked.
I snickered and shook my head before I took another bite of my burger.
“Please talk to me,” he said. “Don’t keep shutting me out.”
“I’m hungry,” I said.
I grabbed my soda and took a massive chug before I swallowed everything down.
“Is that a soda?” Bryan asked.
“It very well is. You got a problem with that?” I asked.
“I thought you were cutting out caffeine is all,” he said.
“Things change. You okay with that?” I asked.
“Whatever you need, you know I’ll give it to you.”
“Uh-huh.”
I took another bite of my burger and moaned as the grease dripped down my face.
“Rough day at the gallery?”
“You have no fucking idea,” I said.
“Wanna talk about it?”
If that was what this man wanted, then bring on the jousting. I was ready to pierce his chest, rip it open, and shove all the hurt and pain I was experiencing into him, so he could deal with this shit.
“Do you know a Laura?” I asked.
“Doesn’t ring a bell. Why?” Bryan asked.
“Tall. Thin. Toned muscles. Long blond hair. Ocean blue eyes. Doesn’t ring a bell?” I asked.
Bryan’s silence caused me to turn my head and look at him. I saw the shocked expression running over his face as I took another bite of my burger. I felt the ketchup dripping down my chin, but I didn’t care. He knew exactly who I was talking about. I finally had him in the corner I wanted, and I was about to pounce.
“I’m not sure how you would know her, but if it’s Laura Green, then yes. I do know a Laura.”
“Funny how you didn’t know her a few seconds ago,” I said. “How do you know her?”
I stared Bryan down as I took another bite of my burger. He looked almost embarrassed. His eyes softened, and his gaze started bouncing around the kitchen. He shuffled on his feet as a sigh fell from his lips. He was shit at keeping secrets. He was shit at covering his tracks.
I could feel my anger, heavy with lead, sinking to my stomach as I swallowed down my greasy food.
“A long time ago, we were together,” Bryan said. “But it was a very brief time. Not even five months. I haven’t seen her since before I left for college, which was why I didn’t think you’d be talking about her.”
“Uh-huh. So, the two of you were together,” I said.
“We were.”
“Kissing and stuff.”
“She was my first kiss, yes,” he said.
“Oh, that’s a fun development. Did she take your virginity?” I asked.
“Hailey, where is this coming from? How do you know her?”
“I don’t think you’re the one in a position to be asking the questions,” I said.
“And why not?” he asked.
“So she did take your virginity. Fun stuff,” I said.
I took the last bite of my burger before I grabbed a napkin and turned back toward the sink. I cleaned my face off before I reached for the fries, swallowing my burger down. I moaned at how good the food tasted. How good grease tasted. How good fat tasted. I picked up a few cheese-covered fries and hovered them over my lips, dropping them into my mouth as Bryan’s eyes ran up and down my body.
“And you haven’t seen her lately?” I asked.
“Like I said, not since I left for college,” he said.
“No flings. No recent one-night stands. No faked late nights at the foundation?” I asked.
I turned my gaze back toward Bryan, and I saw it register on his face. He grimaced before he licked his lips like he was trying to swallow down a bad taste.
“Do you think I’m cheating on you?” Bryan asked.
“Is there any other reason why she would come into the gallery today?” I asked.
“Wait, Laura was in your gallery? Today?”
“She’s beautiful, you know. I could see you hooking up with someone like that on our off moments.”
“We haven’t had any off moments,” he said.
“We did when shit with John came to a head. We were distant when I got sick. Did you confide in her at all?”
“I haven’t seen her, Hailey. And I would never cheat on you. No matter what off moments you think we might’ve had.”
/> I looked into Bryan’s eyes as I took another bite of my cheesy fries. I wanted to believe him. My heart was reaching out for him. I wanted to cry in the crook of his neck and tell him all the horrible things that woman had said to me. But the intimate details she knew about Bryan. How she knew he worked at the foundation. She got that knowledge from somewhere.
“She came into the gallery today asking to see John’s paintings,” I said. “Said she wanted to get to the art showcase we did on him, but she was out of town for work.”
“Okay?” Bryan asked.
“She talked about your tattoos. She’s a real fan of them. Loved Drew’s work from the moment he did that picture of the cabin on your back.”
“I wasn’t with her when I got that tattoo, Hailey. Drew didn’t give me that until after I’d graduated high school,” Bryan said.
“She talked about your work at the foundation.”
“She did what?” he asked.
“Said it was the perfect position for you. Now, how would she know that?” I asked.
I slid another slice of cheesy goodness between my lips as my eyes studied Bryan. The man I had come to trust. The man that had broken down every single wall I had ever thrown up at him. The man who had fucked me and tossed me out onto his porch to try and work me out of his system. The man I still gravitated toward even after he tossed me out like trash.
“Seems like the two of you have talked recently,” I said.
“I swear to you, Hailey. I have not talked to her. She was not there when I got my back tattoo, and she sure as hell hasn’t been around now.”
“Funny, because she acted like she was. Made some interesting assumptions about your personality.”
“Like what?” he asked.
“Like the fact that I needed to call her personal trainer to make sure my body bounced back from this child. You know, since you keep yourself in such fine shape.”
I watched as Bryan’s jaw tensed. His fists clenched at his sides, and he went into attack mode. I’d only ever seen this attitude in him a couple of other times, and it was when his mother was offending me in some way. I felt a part of my resolve crumble. I felt another part of me step over to his side of the story. That he hadn’t seen her recently and that he wasn’t cheating and that this was all some massive plot to get me to break before I had this child.
His child.
Our child.
“She what?” he asked.
“Don’t get all high and mighty,” I said. “The damage is done. I’m aware I’ve put on weight, and it’s your issue if you can’t deal with that.”
“Hailey, I make love to you every night. I whisper in your ear how beautiful I think you are. Why the hell would you ever believe something like that coming from a stranger?”
“She isn’t a stranger to you,” I said.
“Yes, she damn well is to me!”
The tone of his voice caught me off guard, and it caused me to jump. He was angry, but I didn’t care. I was done with the past. With people trying to bring me down and exploit me. I was done with people popping up, thinking they could ruin what should be one of the most beautiful times in my life. I stuffed my face with the rest of the cheesy fries before I grabbed my soda, draining it down the bottom as I kept my eyes hooked with Bryan’s.
For the first time in our relationship, I didn’t care that he was angry.
“I don’t believe you,” I said.
“I am not cheating on you,” he said.
“It doesn’t matter if you aren’t. That woman, who is everything I never will be, came into my art gallery and gave me every inclination that she’d talked to you recently. And if she hasn’t talked to you, then she’s fucking talked to someone. So, I suggest you get on the phone with Laura Green, the Laura you couldn’t remember until I described how beautiful she was, and figure out why the hell she was in my art gallery today.”
“I don’t have her number, Hailey! I literally have not seen her in years!”
“Well, she’s kept tabs on you! And I know you. You’re never oblivious to anything. So, either you’re hiding something from me, or you’re not man enough to admit you got your dick wet with another woman.”
“And you haven’t been hiding something from me? You’ve been avoiding me and skulking around and spending late nights at work, and for what? Because you’re pregnant? Because you have heartburn? Because it’s hard hiring someone? I’ve known for weeks you’ve been hiding something from me, so even if I was hiding something from you, you don’t have a leg to stand on!”
Bryan was panting with anger and burning tears were welling in my eyes. They dripped down my face as I tossed my empty soda cup into the sink. I could feel my body humming with stress. Coursing with unused energy. Voices in my head were screaming, and the child in my body was using my uterus as a kickboxing ring.
I couldn’t take it anymore.
I couldn’t take our life together anymore.
“Get out,” I said breathlessly.
“Hailey, I’m not going anywhere,” he said.
“Get. The fuck. Out.”
“No. I’m staying until we figure this shit out.”
I grabbed my soda cup out of the sink and threw it at him. The empty container splattered against his chest, spilling ice everywhere. I picked up a rag and threw it at him, smacking him in the face as he backed away from my assault.
My vision was blurred, I was so angry with him. With life. With his parents and with mine. With the Ben situation and how I had to sell his brother’s paintings to pay off a debt John never owed in the first fucking place. I was angry with Laura and with Bryan. With the house we were in that seemed too small to hold us any longer. I was angry with the fact that I had no control and that my body was being ripped apart by a growing child who was becoming more and more selfish by the day.
Just like his mother.
Just like Ben.
Just like Laura fucking Green.
“Get! Out!” I shrieked.
I picked up a picture off the table, and I threw it at the door. Bryan left and closed it just in time, shattering the glass into a million pieces. I sank to the floor, my sobs constricting my chest as I curled up into as tight of a ball as I could get in.
Never in my life had I ever wanted to die.
But in that moment, I found myself wishing the cancer would’ve killed me.
Chapter 21
Bryan
I stood on the porch and listened to the glass shatter against the door. What the hell happened? I stood on the porch and listened as Hailey’s sobs poured out from behind the walls of the house. Cheating? On her? Did she not know me at all? How in the world could she possibly think I was cheating on her? If anything, I didn’t have the time to cheat! Between building our damn home, dealing with her emotional bullshit, working at the foundation, and fielding my mother’s asshole antics, I didn’t have a second to myself! Where in the world did she think I had the time to get my dick wet?
I turned and stormed off the porch. If throwing shit made her feel better, then who was I to stop her? She was in a world where I couldn’t reach her, an emotional tirade that was going to leave her alone and empty by the time she was done expressing herself. But I wasn’t going to be here for it. She could work through whatever shit she wanted to alone. The only thing I wanted was for her to open up to me, and she was hell-bent on keeping things from me.
And if she didn’t want to work on it, then maybe none of this was worth it.
I ripped open my truck door and got in. My face was dripping with the wetness of the rag she threw in my face. I sat down on the seat and gripped the steering wheel, trying to come to terms with what had just happened. Every single part of me wanted to run off to Drew’s, to sit down on his couch or sit myself down in his tattoo parlor and have at it. But as I continued to draw deep breaths and calm the shaking of my body, it hit me.
None of this sounded right.
It was absurd that Hailey could ever convince herself
I’d cheat on her, and I was angry with her for believing I could. The two of us had walked through fire together, and I thought we had come out stronger on the other end. But Laura Green popping up from out of the blue was odd. I hadn’t seen that woman since before I graduated high school, and she was nowhere near me when I got that cabin tattoo from Drew. She knew I worked at the foundation alongside Ellen St. Claire, she knew I was happy there, and she obviously knew enough about my life to know where to find Hailey just to piss her off.
And there was only one fountain of information where she could’ve received all of that.
Laura wasn’t even that into me when we were together. It was the reason we didn’t survive past high school. People thought we would. Others around us thought we would get married. But her eyes would always wander, and her attention was always elsewhere. I would talk about how Drew and I wanted to open our own business, and she would laugh and shrug it off like I was talking about some child’s dream of becoming a cowboy someday.
Yes, she was my first kiss. And yes, I gave her my virginity. But none of that mattered. Everyone had a first. Hailey had a first. But with Laura supposedly coming into her gallery and spouting off all this shit, she should have never known, it was becoming clear as to why Hailey thought I might’ve been cheating.
I was still angry with her that she could jump to that conclusion instead of coming to talk with me. But that sort of seemed to be her speciality in life.
I refused to leave. We were going to duke this out one way or another until we can to a conclusion. Either we resolved this and got to the root of it, or it destroyed us, and we became co-parents. But we were adults, and we needed to deal with this as adults. If Hailey wasn’t going to willingly open up to me, then I was going to have to make her.
Even if it meant sending her on a guilt trip.
I slid from my truck and slammed the door behind me. I marched back up to the front door and opened it up, listening as the broken glass slid along the floor. I bent over and picked up the battered frame as Hailey’s sobs poured down the stairs. It was a picture of us on the European tour. Sun-kissed and smiling as we held each other close. Hailey was about four months along in the picture, in a beautiful flowing dress that fluttered around her knees.