by Sharon Coady
“Go on. Go after your dreams, and remember I’m behind you. I love you, Leona.” He squeezed her so tight that she thought her ribs might pop.
“I love you too, Daddy. Thank you.” Leona squared her shoulders and walked past her mother without even glancing at her.
“Leona! Don’t you dare walk out that door. If you do, you won’t be welcome back in this house.”
“That is a damn lie, Louise!”
Leona didn’t glance back as she walked out the door. By the time she got to her car, she was shaking. She did the right thing; her father supported her, but it still hurt like hell that her friends were right and she was so wrong. She started the car, turned it around, and spun her wheels out of the driveway. Coming home would never be the same again.
~~~
John pulled the rental car into the driveway of his townhouse, turned it off, and sat for a few minutes trying to wrap his head around everything that had happened. He prayed for Leo’s sake that her mother had been telling the truth. If this were another one of her “crying wolf” tricks, Leo would be devastated. He felt the emptiness grip his heart again and knew this was going to be a long time healing. Hell, she had been his life since he was twelve years old. What do I do now?
He grabbed his stuff out of the trunk and walked quickly to his front door. Once inside, he looked around the home he had decorated carefully. He realized he had filled it with things that reminded him of Leo. Everywhere he looked, he saw her in something he had placed there. Note to self: call someone to do a makeover on the house. If only it would be as easy to do a makeover on himself.
He unpacked and threw his dirty clothes in a hamper. His heart sped up when he caught the scent of Leona on one of his shirts. She’d worn it after they made love. He put it against his nose and breathed deeply, wanting to burn the scent into his mind. He chided himself as he threw the shirt in with the rest of the clothes.
He checked his phone for what he knew was a ridiculous number of times, praying for a text from her saying he was wrong. Nothing, just like the last time he had looked. He wandered into the kitchen to make something to eat, famished because the last time he had eaten was that morning with her. He made a sandwich and grabbed a beer, pissed that he felt lonely for the first time since he had lived there. Turning on the TV, he flipped through the channels to find something to get his mind off her. He settled on a re-run of Bonanza.
Just as he dozed off, a text came through on his phone. He opened it. Leona on her way back. Her mother did just what we thought. She’s really upset. Texted Heather to say she really screwed up. What do I tell her? Alastair didn’t pull any punches even in his text. Setting the phone down, he put his head in his hands. They were right, which meant his Leo was suffering right now. He picked up his phone and reread the text. She must have confronted her mom and caught the first plane out. He should get his ass in the car, head back, and pick her up from the airport to make sure she was okay.
No, she has to make the first move this time. Maybe he wasn’t needed. Heather, Hope, and Alastair could help pick up the pieces this time. If she wanted to talk to him, she could call. He wouldn’t be a complete dick about it, but he was going to keep his distance for a while. He needed to do this for himself but was going to miss that woman more than she would ever know.
He thought about the drive to the airport, the stubborn set of her chin when he asked her to call her dad instead of rushing off. The anger and frustration he’d kept pent up inside all those years rushed to the surface. Damn her mother for always controlling every aspect of her life. He grabbed his phone and typed his text.
It’s too late. She’s too late. I can’t be just friends with her anymore. Not after everything that’s happened. I’m done. He hit send and turned off the TV, hoping his damn brain would stop long enough for him to get some sleep.
He was exhausted but decided to take a shower. As soon as he turned on the water, his mind instantly went to the shower with her and sadness washed over him. Man, he would be punishing himself for years. He wondered how bad she was.
He shut the water off, dressed, fell into bed, and drifted off to sleep with Leo’s face in his mind.
Chapter Twenty
Leona climbed out of the cab, paid the driver, and dragged her feet up the front steps of the cottage. Taking a deep breath, she placed her key in the door and slowly opened it, glad the hinges didn’t creak. Breathing a sigh of relief that no one was in the kitchen or living room, she stepped through and closed the door softly. Making her way to the kitchen, she started a pot of coffee. Exhausted from the trip, emotionally and from lack of sleep, she knew she should go to bed. But the thought of going into the room where Johnny and she had slept the night before, made her sick to her stomach. She would strip the bed and wash the sheets.
She never received a text back from Alastair so she didn’t know where Johnny was. She’d wait a while and call him if Hope and he didn’t show up for their daily visit. She slipped off her shoes and took two eggs, a pack of biscuits, and butter out of the fridge to make some breakfast. Turning on the oven, Leona realized she hadn’t eaten since breakfast yesterday. Screw it. Big breakfast here I come.
Scrubbing four large potatoes, she put them in the microwave then grabbed a cast iron skillet out of the cabinet. Checking to make sure she had at least a dozen eggs and some cheddar cheese, she threw her fist in the air and whispered, “Score.” She was going to make her breakfast bake and it would be awesome. Chopping up an onion and green pepper, she threw them in the heated pan then grabbed some bacon and sliced it up to cook with it too.
Leona cubed up the potatoes and added them to the mixture, letting them brown nicely on one side. While they browned, she cracked and beat the dozen eggs, which she added to the pan once she flipped the potatoes. Sprinkling the entire thing with cheese, she slid it into the oven to finish cooking. She placed the biscuits on a small baking sheet that would slide in beside the pan. This would be a wonderful meal.
She turned to see Heather and Sebastian watching her, his arm thrown around her protectively.
Leona smiled apprehensively. “Hope y’all are hungry. I made coffee.”
“What happened? I want the full story since you didn’t want to text me everything.” Heather watched her with a blank expression.
Leona felt the smile slide off her face as butterflies fluttered around her stomach. “You guys were right about my mom. My dad is perfectly fine, no issues whatsoever. She lied to get me home and when I confronted her, she admitted it. She doesn’t want me to sing, and she doesn’t want me with Johnny.” She felt the tears pricking her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. “She doesn’t think he’s good enough for me.”
Heather ran to Leona throwing her arms around her. “I’m sorry. I wish she hadn’t done that to you. But John, all of us, thought that would happen.”
“My dad is pissed. You should have heard him tell her off. I imagine when I walked out they probably got in a big fight. She also told me if I walked out, I wasn’t welcome back.”
“What? Oh sweetie, that is horrible.” Heather pulled her in for a tighter hug. “It will be okay. You have us.”
“I should have listened.” Clearing her throat nervously, she asked the question that was heaviest on her mind. “Did Johnny come back?”
“He went home. He was really hurt when you didn’t listen to him. He told us he couldn’t do it anymore. I’m sorry, Leona.” Heather took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “I’m angry at him for leaving.”
“I finally stand up to her and tell her I am going to follow my dreams, to have lost half that dream.”
“Don’t give up on him yet. He’s loved you since he was a kid. He’s just hurt.”
Sebastian placed his hand on Leona’s arm. “She’s right, Leona. You’re all he talks about. I’ll give him a call and try to talk some sense into him.”
“I don’t want to push him. He was so patient with me. All I can do is send him an apology or call him, i
f he’ll answer the phone. I won’t beg him to give us another try. If he comes back, it has to be his decision.” The buzzer went off on the stove. “Come on, let’s eat, I’m starving.” She pulled the biscuits out first, and then the pan.
“That smells and looks wonderful. I didn’t realize how hungry I was.” Sebastian pulled down three plates and mugs for the coffee. “Heather, can you grab the silverware and butter?”
“Sure. I love this breakfast. Wait until you taste it.” She giggled and wrapped her arms around Leona’s shoulders. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Just as they sat down, Alastair and Hope showed up.
“You’re back. So I guess things at home were okay?” he asked, sizing her up.
“Just about exactly how y’all thought they were. Are you hungry? We have plenty, just grab a plate and some silverware,” she said, trying to change the subject.
“Are you mad at me?” Hope stood with her eyes downcast and her hands clasped together. “I didn’t know.”
“I’m not mad at you. It’s my mom that I’m mad at, and myself for believing her and allowing her to control me my entire life. It’s one thing when you’re little but to continue to think she can control me as an adult…” Leona shook her head. “Let’s eat and not talk about it anymore, okay?”
“Thanks, Leona.”
“Actually, I should probably thank you. If you hadn’t called your mom, I would probably still be at her beck and call.”
Alastair patted her hand. “Now, we’re doing the concert Friday night, right?”
“Yes, we are. And we are going to knock them dead with our set. We’ll have them wanting more.” She didn’t feel as happy or confident as she let on. Inside, she was falling apart because too much had happened. She had allowed herself to reach for both dreams only to have half of it walk out because she was stupid. Life would go on with or without him; she would not let this destroy her. She would be strong enough to do that for herself. She had her friends and her talent. If he forgave her and came back, she would welcome him with open arms. If he didn’t come back, she would survive and move on. This would be the new Leona, the stronger, more independent Leona.
“Why don’t you guys practice after breakfast, and Heather and I will clean up the dishes. We can listen while we work.”
“Sure, if Alastair wants to.”
Alastair took her hand and as she glanced up at his eyes, she saw them filled with compassion. He tipped his head slightly, letting her know with that one action, he was with her in whatever she decided.
“Thank you,” she mouthed. “I’m going to try and call him. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
~~~
John woke to the sound of a text coming through on his phone. He swiped his phone and saw it was from Alastair. She’s back. Got in some time this morning. Trying to act like everything is okay but it’s not. She asked about you first thing. Mom told her if she left, she was never welcome in their home again. Thought you should know. Pick up when she calls you, John. Listen to her. She is doing the concerts, we both are. She stood up for herself.
Maybe things could change. Maybe he should have waited to see before he ran off. Damn, she didn’t run this time. He did. Running his hands through his hair, he thought how it must look to her. She trusted him her entire life and just because her mother played her hand, he should have given her the time to figure out what he had known for years.
He made his way into the kitchen and started some coffee. Thoughts ran through his head, each one a different scenario but all of them with the same outcome— their relationship ending because of her mother. He was tired, tired of trying. He grabbed a cup of coffee and scrambled some eggs. As he put food on his plate, his phone rang. His heart thumped in his chest. It was her ring. Her friend Johnny wanted to pick it up quickly, her lover wasn’t so sure.
“Hello, Leo.” His heart thumped so loud in his chest, he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to hear her.
“You were right, Johnny. Mom made it up. There was nothing wrong with my daddy. He was sitting in his chair, perfectly fine, and unaware that she’d even called me. She admitted finally that she lied to get me home, so I couldn’t ruin everything by doing the concerts. I’m so sorry I didn’t listen you.”
“I can’t say that I blame you entirely. Everyone wants to trust their mother.”
“She told me if I walked out the door, I wasn’t welcome back in her home. But I stood up to her, Johnny. I walked out and came right back here. She has controlled me for the last time.”
The silence stretched on and on. What did she want him to say? He didn’t trust himself to speak.
“I’m going to follow my dreams, thanks to you and Alastair. I just wanted to tell you that. I hope you can forgive me. I love you and I hope you find your happiness. Come see us if you can, Johnny. After all, you made this happen.”
“I’m glad you’re going to finally live your life for yourself. I’m sorry I was right about your mom. Trust me, it doesn’t give me any pleasure. I’ve seen it for years. She knew it, and I don’t think she liked me because of it.”
“I guess not.” Her laughed sounded hollow and bitter to his ears. “She said you’re not good enough for me. That remark pissed me off more than everything else she said. She got it wrong but it doesn’t matter now. I hope we can still be friends.”
What? Friends? She was giving up without trying? He thought she was calling to ask him to come back and give them another try. He sat down hard. Did she not want him anymore? “Uh, do you need me to come back?” His gut clenched so hard, bile rose into his throat, making him want to vomit.
“I think I’m okay. I would love for you to come hear us play. If you want…” She sighed. “Johnny, I’m going to hang up now.” Her voice wavered.
“Leo…” The phone went silent. She had hung up without waiting for him to say goodbye. He couldn’t move. He flipped to his text messages and responded to Alastair’s last text. She called, I listened. I’m a fucking idiot. He hit send and slammed his phone down on the table. Being so forthright didn’t pay off for him this time. Hell, running away had cost him everything. After all the years of waiting, he had been the one who made sure their relationship died because of his actions.
Chapter Twenty-one
Leona and Alastair practiced for hours, running through their sets until everything was as smooth as they could get it. Hope and Heather cleaned the kitchen, put everything away, went down to the beach, came back, and started dinner.
“Y’all are still at it?”
“We’re done now. Alastair is awesome. We have these sets down better than ever.”
“Are you okay, Leona?” Hope reached out to touch her arm. “Have you talked to John yet?”
“I called him this morning. I told him a little bit about what happened and apologized. He sounded upset but I hope in time, he’ll forgive me and we can be friends.”
Heather’s jaw dropped as her eyes widened. “You told him you want to be friends?”
“Yes, why?” She glanced from Heather to Hope, and then to Alastair. None of them would meet her eyes. “What?” She put her hands on her hips as her mouth pinched in a tight line while she waited for someone to answer her.
Alastair cleared his throat and shook his head. “He’ll always be your friend, but you know he wanted more from you than friendship. You two had finally gotten there, your mom snapped her fingers, and you ran home. I think John saw what trying to make a life with you would be like, so he ran. Not his best move, but don’t cut the tie on the last chance he has.” Shaking his head, he stood and placed his guitar back into the case.
Leona’s eyes filled with tears. “What do you want me to do? He walked out on me. He told me he has been waiting for years for me to realize I loved him. I understand that. If he loved me and trusted me, shouldn’t he have waited for me? I have to try to be strong enough to move on if he can’t do this with me.”
“I feel like all this is
my fault.” Hope’s eyes filled with tears.
“It’s not your fault. But I think I need to attempt to make my own way and stand on my own two feet. I can’t fall apart over this. I’m moving forward just like Johnny said I have to do. I hope he will want to be a part of this. If he can’t then I will do it without him.” She put a fake smile on her face and hugged Hope. “I have to try to understand how my past has affected him.”
“Please, stop beating yourself up over this.” Leona wiped the tears from her eyes and in an attempt to change the subject, asked, “What are you cooking, Hope? It smells amazing.”
“Just stir fry with veggies, some pasta, and a salad to go with it. I hope it tastes okay. I’m nowhere near as good a cook as you are.”
“You’re a very good cook.” Alastair took her hand and pulled her against him, giving her a kiss on top of her head.
“You’re such a liar. But I love you for saying so.”
He leaned down and kissed her softly.
“Excuse me.” Leona hurried from the room and closed her bedroom door just as the tears started to spill over. She needed to get her shit together and not let anyone see how much she missed Johnny. He heart ached, knowing she had caused him to doubt her, to make him feel uncertain about her love for him, and her strength to get out of her mother’s clutches.
“Leona?” A soft knocking on her door got her attention. “It’s Hope. Can I come in?”
“I’ll be out shortly.”
“I know, but I wanted to speak to you alone, if it’s okay. Please?”
Leona got off her bed and opened the door. She motioned for Hope to come in, not looking at her as she closed the door. Crossing her arms over her chest, she waited for her to speak.
“I know this is very hard on you, and I am so angry at John for running away. He should have waited to see what was going on before he took off. That wasn’t fair to you.”