by Deborah Carr
‘I’d never think that,’ she said, wanting to put him at his ease. She was glad he had mentioned her parents and hoped he would continue to do so.
He glanced around them and, lowering his voice, said, ‘Your parents have been very gracious towards me, Florence.’ She smiled, waiting for the ‘but’ in the conversation. ‘However—’ he thought for a moment ‘—I don’t wish to say this in a derogatory way, but I sense that Mrs Rowe isn’t as, shall we say, comfortable as Mr Rowe might be with you spending time with me. Would I be correct in saying as much?’
She considered her reply carefully.
‘Please don’t feel you must answer my question. I’m aware it probably isn’t the best one to make over luncheon.’
Florence didn’t want him to mistake her thoughtfulness for upset, so shook her head and smiled. ‘I don’t mind you asking at all.’ She didn’t want to reference Jesse’s frailty so simply said, ‘She is a little unnerved by our age difference, maybe?’
He seemed satisfied with her answer and nodded. ‘I can understand her thinking in this way.’ He took time to cut his roast beef before placing a forkful into his mouth and chewing.
‘Mother is very protective of us girls,’ she added, wanting to reassure him that her mother’s reaction would have been the same for either one of her daughters.
‘Naturally. I can imagine I would be the same with my own children, especially daughters, if I was lucky enough to have them.’
She continued eating her meal, her enjoyment of the perfectly cooked beef, carrots and roast potatoes lessened by her mother’s attitude to Jesse and the fact that this kind man had picked up on it enough to remark about it. Why couldn’t her mother simply trust in her daughter’s instincts, Florence mused miserably. She hoped that her attitude to him wouldn’t ruin the rest of his visit to the island. They were becoming close and she would hate for anything to destroy that friendship.
‘I shan’t ask your father to let you have any further time away from Rowe’s Stationers until after I’ve spent time with your family at chapel on Sunday. Hopefully at lunch afterwards your mother might get to know me better. I will try my best to make her soften her concerns about me. I would like her to discover that despite my being over a decade older than you, and my health issues, I have the support system in place to ensure that you would still have a happy and fulfilled future with me.’
She hoped so too. She was sad to think that had to wait another two days to spend any more time with Jesse. Tomorrow was Saturday though, and, as their busiest day at the shop, she knew she would have felt too guilty to ask for time away from her job.
They finished their lunch and, after a brief walk while their food digested, they made their way to where Jesse had pre-arranged to meet their carriage. After settling themselves down in their seats, the driver clicked the horse to walk on.
‘This has been a wonderful day out,’ Florence said. ‘Have you enjoyed today as much as I have?’
He smiled at her. ‘I believe so, Florence.’ He hesitated briefly and glanced at the driver before speaking. ‘I was hoping to speak to your father.’
‘Really?’ Florence said, unsure if he meant to speak to her father about her, or if he was still referring to her mother’s reticence towards their friendship.’
‘Yes.’ He cleared his throat and took her left hand in his. ‘Coming to Jersey has been an incredible experience for me.’
‘I’m pleased you think so,’ she said, delighted to hear him repeat his enjoyment of the island.
‘Not only because I’ve discovered this gem of a place, but because of my meeting you, Florence.’
‘Oh, is that so?’ she asked, unsure how to react or what exactly she was reacting to.
‘Yes. You might, or might not, have guessed that I have developed feelings towards you. Feelings of love, rather than mere friendship.’ His face reddened slightly.
Florence’s heart constricted with love for him. He looked as if he wanted to say more, so, rather than interrupt his thoughts, she waited for him to continue.
Jesse took a deep breath. ‘I know I’m older than you, but at this moment I feel like a schoolboy unable to form an intelligent sentence. Florence Rowe, I know that my trip here has to end soon, but I find that I am unable to imagine my future without you in it.’
‘Future?’ she couldn’t help asking, her voice wobbly. Her heart pounded. Was he broaching the subject of marriage? Was Jesse about to propose to her? She hoped so with all her heart.
‘Yes, dearest Florence.’ He took her other hand in his and gave her a gentle squeeze. ‘Would you mind very much if I speak with your father this evening on our return to your home? I am aware of your mother’s feelings, but maybe if she knows that my intentions towards you are to give you not only a good home and family of your own, but a rewarding life that will satisfy your needs, she might soften her resistance to us being together. I am aware of what my future entails—’ he indicated his walking stick ‘—I don’t want you to think that you will be wholly responsible for any care that I might need. I have always been an independent, proud man and I aim to continue in that way.’
‘Do you mean you wish to speak to him about …?’ She couldn’t finish her sentence. What if she had taken the wrong meaning from what he said.
Jesse sighed, his eyes exuding all the love she had never dared hope to be the recipient for.
‘Yes, Florence. I’m sorry. I’m acting like a bumbling fool. I wish to ask your father for his permission to marry you. If you are happy for me to do so.’ He frowned, seeming momentarily concerned.
Her feelings for him threatened to overwhelm her and she didn’t know whether to cry out or laugh. Instead she took a deep breath to regain some control and said, ‘I … well, I would be delighted if you spoke to my father, Jesse.’
‘Truly?’
She couldn’t help laughing. Then, aware that her cheeks were wet, realised that she was crying too. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so … I don’t even know what I’m saying. Sorry.’
He took a white handkerchief from his top pocket, and, shaking it slightly to unfold it, gently dabbed at her eyes before drying her cheeks and handing it to her.
‘Please, dearest one, don’t apologise. I am only too relieved that my feelings towards you are reciprocated.’ He leant forward and, placing the tips of his fingers underneath her chin, gently lifted it and kissed her. ‘I believe we could have a magical future together.’
Florence was taken aback by his actions and for a moment couldn’t think how to respond to the delightful sensation of his lips on hers. ‘As do I, dear Jesse,’ she said, wiping her eyes once more, willing her mother not to come between their plans to marry.
She stared into his eyes. Why did this happy time have to be blighted by her mother’s concerns towards Jesse? Could she possibly ever walk away from this man and his proposal to appease her mother? Florence wondered miserably. She doubted it very much. She wanted her future to be with him, to share all the excitement and dreams that he had confided in her. She gave a shuddering breath. The thought of having to make a choice between the man she loved, and her mother hurt made her throat constrict with unshed tears. One of them was going to suffer heartbreak at her hands; it was unavoidable. She loved them both and to hurt one of them was going to devastate her.
An hour later, Florence was barely able to contain her disappointment. ‘Father’s out?’ she said to Amy, looking about the living room as if her father might be hiding behind a chair. ‘Do you know when he’ll be back?’
‘I’ve no idea,’ Amy said frowning. ‘Why? What’s so important you need to speak to him now?’ She took Florence’s hand in hers. ‘Nothing’s wrong, I hope?’
‘No,’ Florence assured her, trying to sound calmer. ‘Mr Boot is outside in a carriage. He’s waiting to hear if Father is available for him to speak to about something.’
‘What?’ Amy asked.
‘I can’t tell you now,’ Florence said. ‘I need
to go and let him know that Father isn’t here. Maybe he can speak to him after chapel on Sunday.’ She couldn’t help feeling let down that this most important of conversations would have to wait two days, but knew how busy her father would be the following day. She would simply have to do her best to wait with as little impatience as possible.
She ran down the stairs and up to the carriage. Jesse beamed at her and went to stand.
‘Is he there?’
She shook her head, unable to hide her disappointment. ‘I’m afraid not. He’s out visiting friends with Mother. Tomorrow is always a busy day for him,’ she said. ‘He always does his paperwork after closing the shop on Saturdays and won’t thank me for asking him to interrupt his routine. We’ll have to wait until Sunday to speak to him. Do you mind?’
He leaned down to her. ‘I’ve waited my whole life so far for that conversation and can wait another forty-eight hours.’
Soothed slightly by his calmness, Florence nodded. ‘I shall see you at chapel then. Will you want to meet us here and walk down with the family, or should we meet you there.’
‘I’ll take a carriage direct to the chapel. Unless you think your parents would like to ride down to Grove Place with me?’
She shook her head. ‘No, there will be too many of us. We’ll meet you there, just before eleven.’
‘Perfect. Goodbye, Florence.’ He sat upright in his carriage seat and gave her a nod. ‘I’ll see you all on Sunday then and look forward to it.’
She smiled and waved as his carriage moved on. ‘As will I,’ she whispered as the carriage took him along Queen Street. Florence would just have to be patient and hope that the family’s get together with Jesse at chapel and later at lunch would go some way to dull her mother’s fears about the future she would have, should she marry Jesse.
Chapter 14
Florence stood chatting nervously to Amy near to where their parents chatted friends with Adelaide and her husband. She hoped Jesse hadn’t changed his mind about coming. Could he have changed his mind about speaking to her father? She tried not to give in to her panic and kept a smile plastered on her face to greet friends and acquaintances that she was used to seeing each Sunday.
‘Here’s his carriage,’ Amy whispered, nudging her gently. She narrowed her eyes in amusement. ‘You didn’t think he would come, did you?’
‘I did,’ Florence argued, keeping her voice at a whisper so as not to alert anyone else. ‘Don’t tease. This is an important day for me.’
‘I wish you’d tell me why,’ Amy said. ‘We always confide in each other. I don’t know why you’re keeping something from me now, especially when it’s obviously worrying you deeply.’
‘It isn’t,’ she fibbed. ‘Anyway, I can’t tell you. Not yet.’
‘Why not?’
Florence didn’t want to tempt fate, but then again, this was Amy and she was right; they did always confide in each other.
Amy stared at her silently. Unnerved by her sister’s eyes boring into hers, Florence looked away. Her sister knew her well enough to pick up on the fact that something was troubling her, she felt certain of it. She didn’t want Amy to know, at least not until Jesse had had a chance to speak to their father; but first they had today to get through.
Amy grabbed her arm and squeezed it tightly. Florence glared at her. ‘Ouch, that hurts.’ Then she realised that her sister was staring at her open-mouthed. Florence could tell that she had guessed her secret.
‘Is he going to ask Father if he can marry you?’ she whispered breathlessly. ‘You have to tell me. I’m right, aren’t I?’
Florence glanced around them, horrified in case anyone else heard. ‘Shush.’
‘I am. I knew it,’ she said clapping her hands together, obviously excited by this news.
‘Fine, you’re right,’ Florence whispered back at her anxiously.
‘No!’ Amy gasped, her exclamation alerting others around them who turned their heads to see what the excitement was about.
‘Amy!’ Florence hissed, horrified that her sister might blurt out her secret. ‘Please. Stop it. You’re making people look at us and I don’t want Mother to know there’s something I’m keeping from her. Not yet, at least.’
Amy grimaced. ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to do that,’ she whispered. ‘You’ve finished the book already?’ she asked loudly, hopefully putting them off the scent of their real conversation.
Florence was relieved when everyone soon lost interest and continued with their conversations again. They were no doubt bored at the thought of two women discussing books to want to waste time listening in on their conversation.
‘Honestly, Amy,’ she whispered. ‘Please, don’t do that to me.’
‘Sorry. I wasn’t thinking.’
A murmur arose around them as Jesse’s carriage came to a halt at the bottom of the chapel steps. Their father, spotting him, called out to welcome him and went to greet him as he stepped down.
‘Mr Boot, how splendid of you to join our congregation here today. We’re very happy to see you.’
Florence watched as her father took Jesse to introduce him to everyone. She smiled back at him when he glanced over briefly at her, soothed to know that it wasn’t long now until they could hopefully go public with their relationship.
Everyone took their usual places in the large church and Florence tried her best not to keep sneaking peaks over at Jesse, sitting next to her parents in the pew in front of where she sat with her sisters, brother and their families.
Eventually, after what seemed like a much longer sermon than usual, they all made their way outside.
Florence walked up to stand near her parents who were introducing Jesse to more of their acquaintances. Finally, a couple of them began speaking to each other and her parents about an event they had all been invited to in a couple of weeks, and she and Jesse were left by themselves.
‘Hello,’ he whispered, his gloved hand grazing hers, sending static through it despite their skin not actually touching.
‘I’m glad you came today; I feel like I haven’t seen you in days.’
‘It has only been two,’ he teased.
‘It feels like many more to me.’
He sighed. ‘Good, I’m glad to hear you say so. It felt like more to me, too.’
Two women came over and spoke to Florence, waiting obviously for her to introduce Jesse to them. After some small talk, she was relieved when they spotted another person they were wanting to catch up with.
She opened her mouth to speak, when Amy appeared next to her. ‘Good morning, Mr Boot,’ she said. ‘You’re still coming to lunch with us today?’
‘Yes. I’m looking forward to it very much.’ He gave Florence a quick glance before adding, ‘Your parents were very kind to invite me to join you all today.’
‘We’re delighted you could be with us,’ Amy said. ‘Mother would have liked to cook a roast, but because of chapel we usually have cold meats and Jersey Royals with salad. I hope that is to your liking?’
‘Very much so.’
Florence’s parents came over to them. ‘Are you ready to go back for some lunch now?’ her father asked.
They strolled the ten-minute walk up Halkett Place. Florence stopped every so often to speak to friends as they and other families walked on their way from church either to their homes, or to visit relatives and friends. She much preferred to be out walking on a Sunday, when everything was more sedate, rather than any other day of the week when horses trotted along the cobbles and wooden wheels noisily rumbled past the shops, and employees rushed from their place of work to deliver at customers’ homes.
They reached 27 Queen Street and her mother led the way upstairs to the living room.
‘Please take a seat,’ her father said to Jesse before offering him a refreshment.
Florence and Amy went to help their mother in the kitchen. Most of the preparations had been carried out before they left for chapel, but her mother was boiling the Jersey Royals so that
they were hot when served.
Florence took two glasses of the cold lemonade into the living room for her father and Jesse.
Jesse thanked her and when he took the glass from her hand, she noticed his was trembling. She realised he was building up to speaking to her father. She barely had time to think of whether this was the right time, when Jesse stood up.
‘Mr Rowe,’ he said quietly. ‘I was wondering if we could have a brief word in private once Miss Rowe leaves the room?’
Her father frowned. ‘Is something the matter?’
Jesse swallowed and seemed to stand up taller before replying. ‘Hopefully not,’ he said. ‘Are you happy for me to do this, Miss Rowe?’
‘Yes,’ she said, hearing the unmistakeable tremor in her voice. Jesse gave her a nod.
Her father turned to Florence. ‘Is everything all right?’ he asked her. It was typical of him to check that she was happy with what was about to happen.
‘Yes, Father. I am aware why Mr Boot wishes to speak to you. I’ll leave you both for the moment and go to see if Mother needs more help in the kitchen.’
She left the room. Her heart pounded rapidly as she closed the door, willing her father to agree to Jesse’s proposal. Florence heard her mother’s voice as she asked Amy to pass her the colander and her stomach fluttered anxiously. What if her father agreed to them marrying, but her mother put a stop to it? Her concern was certainly real, but she hoped that her mother would listen to reason and be persuaded that her marrying Jesse was her dream.
She strained her ears to hear what they were saying but was unable to pick out any particular words. She soothed herself with the thought that at least there were no harsh tones emanating from the room. That was something to be positive about, she decided.
Eventually, after what was probably only minutes but seemed to Florence to have taken hours, the living room door opened. She studied her father’s face. He seemed happy. Although on second glance she saw an underlying nervousness about him. Was it because he had giving his permission with the knowledge that her mother would need to be persuaded that Florence marrying Jesse was the right thing to allow them to do?