by Irene Brand
“Autumn,” Trina said sternly, and Autumn grinned. When Trina used that tone of voice, Autumn expected a lecture. “Clara Weaver has a strong dominating personality and she structured her whole life around her family. She had a blueprint of how she expected her daughters to turn out, and all of you disappointed her.”
Laughter gleamed in Autumn’s blue eyes. “Put that way, it does seem as if Mother had cause for a grievance. I guess we were rebellious, thankless daughters.”
“I’m not trying to be funny, but you should understand your mother’s viewpoint and have a little sympathy for her. Her plans were crumbling, and she thought all of her sacrifices for you had been wasted.”
“And my defection was the last straw, even for Daddy,” Autumn commented grimly. “It was no secret that I was his favorite daughter, mostly because I spent so much time with him taking care of the horses. Although I’d heard he’d disowned me, I couldn’t believe it until he refused to speak to me Monday.”
“Many times it’s the child you love the most who gives the most pain,” Trina said in a solemn voice, as if she spoke from years of experience and wisdom. “You must have caused him a lot of grief when you left, and no doubt your mother blamed him for your leaving because he’d allowed you to spend so much time with the Belgians.”
“I’m sorry for many of my actions of the past, but I’ve never regretted that I defied her about dating Harrison. Mother had no right to dominate our lives, and she’s still doing it. She won’t let Summer leave her side, and I have no doubt she’d like to interfere in my decisions now.”
“You’re never going to change her. God can change her will, but you can’t. We need to pray for a softening of your mother’s heart.”
“I do pray for her and for my attitude toward her, but I won’t have her meddling in my life. She still won’t accept Nathan, and since Harrison is divorced, she might take it into her head to start matchmaking again. Mother would love to have one of her daughters marry a doctor.”
Trina shrugged her slender shoulders. “Well, what mother wouldn’t? Accept your mother as she is and learn to live with her.”
The bell over the door jingled, indicating their first customer had arrived, and Autumn stood up and put on a smock. They faced a full morning in the surgery room.
“Wait until after we’ve been to dinner tomorrow night before you give me a lot of advice. You don’t know Mother as well as I do.”
They arrived at the farm a half hour before the dinner hour to allow time for Dolly to see the Belgians. The mares had already been turned into the pasture, so while Trina and Dolly stayed behind the gate, Autumn walked to the nearest Belgian and led her over to the fence. She recognized the mare as Tulip, Noel’s mother. The mare nuzzled Autumn’s head and shoulders. As Autumn leaned against the huge horse, she was overcome with a dreadful sense of loss. She’d lost eight years of her life estranged from her family. If she had it to do over again, would she have obeyed her parents and stayed in Greensboro so she could be near her father and the farm she loved so much? Was Nathan worth the sacrifice she’d made for him?
Ignoring the tears threatening to overflow, Autumn coaxed the Belgian to the fence where Dolly climbed up on the palings and petted Tulip’s side. Trina took Autumn’s hand and squeezed it, a compassionate look in her eyes.
“Are you all right?” she whispered.
“Yes, but whenever I come home, I’m reminded of the happiness of my first eighteen years and how miserable I’ve been since then. I’m almost sorry I came back to Greensboro. I’d pushed the past into the background, learned to live with the pain. I was making a new life for myself. I don’t know whether I’m wallowing in self-pity or what, but I can’t find peace of mind anywhere.”
Trina laid her hand on Autumn’s shoulder. “It’s going to work out all right. God is in control of the situation, and I’m praying He will give you the grace to accept whatever happens. He had a purpose in bringing us to Greensboro.”
Tulip wandered away, and Dolly said, “And this is where you lived when you were a little girl?”
Autumn nodded. “I perched on this fence and petted Belgian mares before I could read and write. Daddy didn’t have any sons, but he often bragged that I was as good with horses as any boy could be. He encouraged me to learn everything I could about the equine industry. I could have lived the rest of my life on this farm, but then Mother decided I should be a debutante. And speaking of Mother, we must go to the house. It’s inexcusable to be late for a meal here.”
The evening sun cast mellowing rays over the white ancestral house camouflaging the ravages time had brought to the home. Shades of yellow accented the scalloped shingles on the house. The stained glass in the transom above the door and in the two windows along the front shone like dewdrops gleaming on a verdant, green pasture. With its original slate roof, large verandas, conical tower, two bay windows, and a second-floor balcony, the house looked much as it had when it was built a century ago.
Ray had left instructions with Olive that Autumn and Trina should be paid every two weeks, so having some cash in their pockets, they’d bought a bouquet of carnations for Clara. They stopped by the car to get the flowers, which Dolly proudly carried into the house. Autumn watched her with amusement, thinking how nice it would be to have a daughter like Dolly, especially one who looked so much like Nathan. Everywhere she turned, there was something to remind her of Nathan. No wonder he dominated her thoughts.
Clara sat in the living room, dressed in a black silk dress with silver heirloom jewelry around her neck and in her earlobes. Summer stood by her chair.
“Hello, Mother,” Autumn said, still disbelieving that this shriveled woman could be the matron who’d ruled like a queen over Indian Creek Farm. Had she been the cause of Clara’s downfall, Autumn wondered?
“You remember Trina, don’t you? And this is Dolly, Trina’s niece.”
Dolly stepped forward proudly. “Here’s some flowers for you, Mrs. Weaver. I helped choose them, but Aunt Trina and Autumn paid for them.” Looking at Summer, who stood beside Clara’s chair, Dolly continued, “You look like Autumn—you must be her sister. You’re pretty, too.”
Summer smiled slightly. “So I’ve been told. Would you like to see some pictures of us when we were about your age?”
“Yes. There’s nobody but me in my family. It must be fun to have sisters.”
“That’s debatable,” Summer said, with a teasing glance at Autumn. She took Dolly’s hand. “We have enough pictures of the Weaver sisters to fill a gallery, but let’s look in Daddy’s office first. The best ones are in there.”
Clara said to Trina, “Now tell me what you hear from Spring and Bert.” With a stern look at Autumn, she added, “Unfortunately, my daughters aren’t letter writers, so I seldom hear from Spring.”
We learned that from you, Mother, Autumn thought, remembering the days she was away at college, homesick for news of the family. She’d always looked forward to a message from her mother, only to open an envelope with a few terse words confined to the health of the family and details of household management.
Trina pulled a chair close to Clara. “My aunt, Bert’s mother, went to visit Spring and Bert a few months ago, so I can give you some firsthand information. They’re getting along fine, and their two children are adorable. Their term in Bolivia will be up in a few months, and they’ll be coming home on furlough. There’s a possibility they may stay in the States.”
Clara was engrossed in Trina’s news, so Autumn joined Summer and Dolly in the office. A large oil portrait of the three daughters, painted when Autumn was ten years old, hung on the wall opposite Landon’s desk. The rest of the wall held framed photographs of Autumn and her sisters, many of them taken with the Belgian horses. One of the pictures showed Spring in her wedding dress flanked by Autumn and Summer in their bridesmaids’ finery standing in front of a white gazebo. The large picture of Autumn seated on a black, silver-ornamented cart, holding the reins of a draft horse, wh
ich Landon always said was his favorite, had been taken on her fourteenth birthday.
Summer settled Dolly behind Landon’s desk and handed her a photo album. While the child slowly turned the leaves of the album, Autumn said quietly, “I’m surprised my pictures are still displayed. I figured they’d remove all trace of me from the house.”
“Although neither of them would admit it, they’ve missed you too much for that. Mother and Daddy haven’t been happy together since you left. Each blames the other for your departure.”
Summer turned a frame on the desk holding Autumn’s high school graduation picture, and Autumn sighed at the photo. On that day she thought the whole world lay at her feet.
Without bitterness, Summer said, “You always were Daddy’s favorite. Time and anger can’t change that.”
“I find that hard to believe when he passed me on the street this week and didn’t even acknowledge my presence.”
“You stick around a while and he’ll get over it. I’ve seen him sitting at this desk too often with your photograph in his hands to believe he’s never going to forgive you.”
Autumn laid her arm across her sister’s shoulder.
“Why don’t you leave and get on with your life, Summer? Surely they can afford a nurse to care for Mother?”
Summer reached for Autumn’s hand. “Money can’t buy family, and Mother has been so afraid. She’d have died if I hadn’t stayed here.”
Autumn lowered her voice. “I can’t believe Mother is afraid of anything.”
“She’s afraid of growing old and dying without her daughters, and I want to help her. I’m resigned to staying here now. For the first year, I felt like a prisoner and I was rebellious, but I’ve come to terms with my situation.”
“Don’t you have any time to yourself?”
“Very little.”
“I wish I could relieve you, but even if I came to work at Ray’s clinic full-time, I couldn’t help with Mother when Daddy forbids me to come home. I’ll feel guilty when I leave you with all this responsibility after Ray gets back, but I can’t stay here under the circumstances.”
Summer cast an oblique glance toward her younger sister. “Not even to be near Nathan Holland?”
Autumn flushed. “I’ll admit I didn’t forget Nathan, and I was happy to see him when I came home. But I don’t know what the future holds for us.”
“Mother hasn’t said, but the more she hears about Nathan’s rise to a place of importance in the community, I figure she wishes she’d let you marry him. She’s always wanted to add Woodbeck Farm to ours and she muffed her only chance. I’m sure she wouldn’t be nearly as opposed to your marriage as she once was.”
“Thanks for telling me that, Summer, but the change in Nathan’s social standing hasn’t had any effect on me. I don’t regard him more highly than I did when he was working for Daddy. I would have taken him when he was penniless.”
The grandfather clock in the hall struck six o’clock, and as if on cue, the doorbell rang.
Autumn looked quizzically at Summer, who smiled mysteriously. “Mother doesn’t give up easily, as you know. Don’t blame me—I tried to dissuade her.”
Mystified, Autumn walked into the dining room behind Summer and Dolly. Harrison Lowe, who was apparently also a dinner guest, was wheeling Clara into her place at the table.
Anger surged through Autumn until her ears rang, and she mustered all her willpower to keep back the denunciatory words that sprang to her lips. Is she going to start this again? I won’t stay. I can’t allow Nathan to think I’m interested in Harrison.
Trina gave her a warning glance, and Summer gripped the back of her chair. When she noted the surprise in Harrison’s eyes, Autumn knew he hadn’t been aware of Clara’s scheme, either. She shouldn’t take her anger out on him.
Harrison reached out a hand to her. “How nice to see you again, Autumn!”
She shook hands with him and introduced him to Dolly and Trina. Did he remember the last time they’d sat together at this table? Had Harrison ever been interested in her as a prospective wife, or was the match only an idea in Clara’s mind?
Mrs. Hayes came into the dining room, followed by a maid. While the two women prepared to serve the food, Autumn wavered between leaving or staying, until an innocent remark from Dolly made her laugh, and she decided to deal with the dilemma the best she could.
With an appetizer of glazed pineapple hearts before them, Clara lifted her fork.
“Why, Mrs. Weaver!” Dolly said. “Are you going to eat without praying?”
Clara looked sharply at Dolly, and she said stiffly, “We’re not accustomed to praying in this house!”
“Mama taught me never to eat without thanking God for my food.” She folded her hands and closed her eyes. “God is great and God is good, and we thank Him for this food. Amen.” Dolly opened her eyes, and with a bright smile, she said, “Now, we can eat.”
Autumn exchanged an amused glance with Trina, but Dolly’s unconscious gesture caused her anger to disappear. Trina was right. Anger wasn’t going to change her mother, but love and prayer might. She resolved to act as if her mother had no ulterior motives for this dinner party. She was pleasant to her mother and Harrison.
They moved into the living room at the end of the meal, and Clara suggested that Autumn should take Dr. Lowe on a tour of the horse barns.
“Daddy is the one to do that,” she refused. “I’ve been away from the horses too long. There’s not much I can tell him.”
At that opportune time, the beeper at Harrison’s side sounded. He excused himself and went into the next room to take the call.
“I’m sorry to leave now,” he said when he reentered the living room. “A hospital emergency.” He bid them a cordial goodbye, and Summer walked to the door with him.
“He’s certainly a gracious man,” Clara said. “I can’t imagine why his wife divorced him.” With a pointed glance at Autumn, she said, “I suspect he’ll remarry soon, since he has a child to raise.”
“Mother,” she said, “I have no interest in Harrison. I believe the feeling is mutual. He’s good company, and I’ve no doubt he’s a fine doctor, but he isn’t the man for me. I don’t feel a tremor of excitement when he’s around.”
“I suppose Nathan Holland is exciting to you?”
Autumn smiled, remembering two nights ago when Nathan had kissed her and she’d felt as if the universe had exploded.
“He does have his exciting moments,” she said. “Actually, how much do you know about Nathan? How many times have you talked with him?”
“I’ve never talked with him. My only contact with him has been at a distance.”
“Then you really can’t make a judgment on what Nathan is like. I don’t know whether there’ll ever be anything between us, but please leave us alone, Mother. Let us make that decision ourselves.”
On the drive home, Trina said, “I thought the evening turned out well enough. And I’m proud of you for controlling your anger when you found out your mother had invited Dr. Lowe.”
“I was angry,” Autumn admitted, “but I didn’t think I should take my frustrations out on Harrison. I’m sure he was an innocent party to the meeting. I only hope Nathan doesn’t hear about the dinner.”
Chapter Thirteen
But an incident the next day convinced Autumn that Nathan had heard about the dinner party. They were in surgery and Trina was monitoring the heartbeat of a sedated dachshund that had jumped over a fence and torn its stomach. The wound had been cleaned and Autumn was applying a few sutures when Olive entered the surgery. She closed the door behind her and waited until Autumn finished.
“Nathan is on the phone. He has another sick cow.”
“Tell him I can come within a half hour,” Autumn said, without lifting her eyes from the work she was doing.
Olive hesitated, before adding in a nervous voice, “He wants Trina to check on the animal. What shall I tell him?”
Autumn’s head reeled. She clos
ed her eyes and grabbed the table for support.
“I won’t go,” Trina said angrily.
“Yes, you will,” Autumn responded grimly. “He obviously doesn’t want me, and we’re obligated to take care of Ray’s customers.”
“You’re much better with large animals than I am.”
“Makes no difference. I’ll tell you what to do.”
“I have to give him an answer,” Olive insisted.
“I guess I’ll have to go,” Trina said. When Olive left the room, Trina tearfully said, “I’m so sorry about this. I thought you were getting along so well.”
“I thought so, too. I suppose somehow he’s learned that we had dinner with Dr. Lowe. He was jealous of my association with Harrison in the past.” Her eyes blazed. “Will you tell me why I’m so fond of a man who doesn’t trust me?”
The minute he hung up the phone, Nathan was sorry he’d asked for Trina. Maybe he’d jumped to the wrong conclusion again. Just because Autumn and Harrison had been invited to dinner at Indian Creek Farm didn’t necessarily mean she was interested in him. And Jeff Smith, Weaver’s horse trainer, had indicated that Trina and Dolly were there, too.
Leaning on the fence, watching his herd of Angus, while he waited for Trina, Nathan knew the trouble lay in the past. However hard he tried to throw off the feeling, he’d always felt inferior to the Weavers. To know that Dr. Lowe had been invited to dinner, while Autumn’s parents wouldn’t even acknowledge his existence hit him in his most vulnerable spot.
Landon had told him he wasn’t good enough for his daughter, and at that time, Nathan agreed with him. He’d hoped that when he owned the adjoining farm to their own, the Weavers might be friendly. That hadn’t happened. But in all honesty, he couldn’t remember that Autumn had ever treated him as an inferior, so why did he take his frustrations out on her?
When he saw Autumn’s car coming up the driveway, Nathan eagerly turned that way, happy that she’d come after all. She’d probably be as mad as an ornery bull, but he was prepared to deal with her anger and apologize. His spirits fell when Trina stepped out of the car.