Lee just looked back at her, thumbing the corner of a page.
Patty scooted forward, dropping her voice. “I don't believe Mamma. You weren't making all that happen. You were scared, too, weren't you?"
Lee nodded. “Yeah, I was scared, too."
"That bad man on the T.V.? That girl?” Lee could see the memory of the fear clearly etched into her eyes. “The terrible bad things he was doing to that girl. Was all that real?"
"Do you remember what Dad said about our antenna picking up weird signals?” Starting slowly, Lee carefully chose his words. “Remember how Lucky Pup wasn't really on, though we saw it? Remember Superman, that night? Those shows had been off the air for years, but we saw them on our T.V. Maybe the other ... the man doing those bad things was something like that, something our antenna picked up. Patty, I don't really know what it was we saw. Whatever it was, though, I don't think it was real, real. Not like you and me sitting here right now. It might have been something that happened, but happened long ago. I know you didn't hear any of this, but like how Miss Laura talked about history never really being over and done with. Some stuff just kind of doesn't go away."
"But that feeling,” Patty was stammering, obviously finding it difficult to put her feelings into words. “Those sounds we heard, the voices, the flashing, like lightening, I was so scared. All that was real. I don't care what Mamma says. It wasn't no dream. It wasn't you playing tricks. It was real."
Lee nodded.
"I've heard Mrs. Voorman talking about the little colored girls, the ones who disappeared.” Patty's eyes had grown wide. “Do you think whatever was in our house that night went after them when it couldn't get us?"
"I don't know.” Lee came back. “Could be?"
"They probably didn't have a strong big brother with ‘em to stick up for ‘em, like me.” She looked him straight in the eye. “I told Mamma you saved me. I told Daddy, too. I told ‘em about the way it was pulling at me, and how you wouldn't let go. And you could have run away, but you didn't. You wouldn't let go for nothing."
Lee didn't know what to say. He didn't have a clue as to what had so suddenly brought this on. He and Patty hadn't talked about that evening at all, except when together as a family and Patty had said very little about her experiences. Patty came scooting over on her knees, pushing toys out of the way until she was just inches from her brother. With her blonde pigtails in curls, her little pink shorts, and the white top she was wearing with a fluffy knit bunny applique on it, she looked so young, even to Lee.
"I hear things, at night,” she said almost in a whisper. “There's something outside, something in the dark, isn't there?"
Lee had to think carefully for a moment before he answered. “I think so.” With the near trembling look on her face, he couldn't even begin to think about telling her about the night he was chased.
She put her hands on his knees. “Do you ever hear it, too? Sometimes I know it's right outside my window, trying to look in. I know it wants me to look out and see it. But I won't. If Mamma opens my blinds I get up and close ‘em. I get so scared when I hear it outside I cover up under my covers and my toes feel all cold."
"Why don't you go to Mamma and Daddy's room?” Lee came back.
Patty's pout was so sincere. “Mamma gets mad. The last time I did she told me I was being a big baby. She said she lived here when she was a girl, and there weren't no ghosts. And she told me she didn't even have a nightlight. She said I'm spoiled. She said her mama wouldn't have put up with such a thing as being afraid of spooks and coming into her parent's room at night crying. She says if she had, her daddy would have locked her in a dark room just to show her there wasn't no such thing. I asked Mamma if we could move away; go back to where we used to live. But she said that was stupid. ‘This is our house now,’ she said. She said there weren't no such things as ghosts, and she didn't want to hear any more such talk.” Patty gave Lee such a serious look. “Why's Mamma crabby all the time? Why won't she let me have any friends over? Why won't she let me go out and play like you do? Why's she always hollering at you, and me, and Daddy?"
Lee left the book on his lap and reached out putting a gentle hand on each shoulder. “I don't know the answer to that, Squirt. I'm pretty sure she's unhappy about something, something deep down. But let me tell you what I do know. If you're scared, you can always come in to my room. We can keep each other safe. Like the other night when it was just you and me. I don't know what's going on around here. But you and I both know there's something. And you know, Squirt, I think ghosts aren't so strong when there's more than one person. I think you and I ... I think we saved each other."
Patty fell into her brother, latching on to this neck and wrapping him in a ferocious hug. Lee knew instantly she was crying even before he heard her first sobs. Patty's small frame began to shudder against him, and he could feel a warm trickle as her tears touched his cheek and neck. It was such a relief, not just for her, and try as he might he couldn't keep a warm rush from flooding his own eyes. After a few minutes Patty pulled back, her face red and her cheeks smeared with tears. Lee quickly reached up using his knuckles to daub at his own eyes.
She laughed as she sniffled, her face all splotchy and her eyes rimmed in pink. “You were crying?"
Lee knew he'd been caught. “You won't tell anybody, will you?"
Patty shook her head, sticking out her bottom lip to the point Lee had to grin.
"I got something else to tell you, too.” Patty scooted back. Still on her knees she shuffled her way over to her chest of drawers, opened the bottom drawer, fished around, and came out with something balled tightly in her fist. She scuffed back over, her arms chugging as she came.
"Here.” She held out her fist and rolled open her fingers. “This is yours."
It was the eye.
Lee leaned forward, cupping his sister's outstretched hand in his own.
"Where'd you find it?"
"In the living room. I was lying on the floor watching T.V. with Mamma. She went to the kitchen, and when I next looked there it was, smack dab right out in the middle of the floor.” She held her fingers splayed so the glossy ball balanced in the center of her palm. “I wasn't going to keep it, honest."
Lee brought his hand over and plucked it from her palm. “At least Mamma didn't get it. She said she was going to throw it away if she found it.” He held the little porcelain ball up so that he could see into the iris. It was oddly warm; maybe from Patty's hand, but then again she hadn't held it but a second or two after retrieving it from her dresser.
"I don't like it,” Patty said flatly. “I don't like it at all."
Lee had to scoot up to slip it into the pocket of his shorts. “Why's that, Squirt?"
"I looked in it. You know, in the green part."
"The iris,” Lee inserted.
"Yeah, in that green part. It's all sparkly.” She seemed to be thinking then suddenly blurted out: “Grandpa Bonham wasn't very nice to Mamma when she was a girl, was he?"
"Did you see something?” Lee asked. “In the eye?” He found himself recalling the vision he'd seen of Uncle Ed and Maggie in this very room. Just the look of the walls and the nightlight as he remembered the scene caused a flood of deja vu flooding to shudder through him in waves.
"I found it the day before we went to the funeral,” Patty said, sitting down with a plop and crossing her legs tightly at the knees. “That night, I was in bed looking at it. It feels so hard.” She was unconsciously rubbing the tips of her fingers together. “Like a new jawbreaker, or a marble, but just really, really hard and smooth.” She opened her mouth and chewed dryly on nothing. “It makes my teeth feel kind of funny to hold it. I kept wanting to look in that, that iris thingy. Like there was something in there. Do you know what I mean?"
Lee nodded. He knew exactly what she meant.
"Then I don't really remember. I was looking down in, and then I remember waking up in the dark. The nightlight wasn't even on. I was scared. I'd had a dre
am, a bad dream. An ugly old man ... Grandpa Bonham I think ... he was all drunk. His nose was awful, and he had hair on his face and in his ears. Mamma was just a little girl. She was afraid of him. Someone was hiding, but I don't know who. There was something in the bathroom. I could see the tiles on the floor.” She made a hexagonal shape with her fingers. “Like a bee hive. But it was all dirty, nasty dirty.” She shuddered. “I can't remember it all too clear, but it made me feel all bad, all icky. It smelled bad, too. Kind of like perfume, but not like Mamma's, a man's.” She wrinkled her nose and made the face Lee had seen when she was forced to eat cabbage. “Yucky and sour! Then I think I was outside in the hall, but way off, and there was water coming out from under the door, and Mamma was there too, but not grown up Mamma. She was screaming. There was something terrible. I didn't want to see. I thought it was gonna get me, too. I was running down the hall but I couldn't go. I was running and running. My hair was in my face. It was dark. I couldn't see. Something was there, in the dark, behind me. I started to slip and fall. I was sliding on the floor, screaming. That's when I woke up. I knew whatever it was right at my window. I could hear it. It had its face right up to the glass. But I wasn't going to look. I was so scared, Lee. I got up and ran to Mamma and Daddy's room, and that's when she told me I was being a baby.” Patty stared at Lee with an odd mixture of questioning and resolve he'd never seen. “What happened in the bathroom, Lee?"
"I don't know,” Lee replied, suddenly so conscious of the feel of the eye in his pocket, so hard, so round. “Why don't you ask Mamma?"
"I did,” Patty came back.
He sat up. “Yeah?"
"She got that funny look.” Patty pursed up her lips into a taunt line. “Her mad look. The frown."
Lee nodded. Even at almost seven, Patty's resemblance to Maggie was profound. She had her father's dark eyes, and you couldn't see the one parent without seeing the other. But she was definitely Maggie's girl.
"Are you afraid of this house, Lee?” she asked point blank.
He knew he needed to be careful here, but it was easy to tell the truth. “No, Squirt. I'm not afraid of this house."
"What about those pictures in the wood, the Indian, the goat monster?"
"What about the pony?” Lee came back. “I see it in the wood grain, too.” Lee knew from Patty's sharp eyes this wasn't the answer she'd been expecting. “I know, I know."
"The doors,” she pressed on, “they keep opening. What if the doors opened at night and it came in?"
"I don't think it's our house,” he said, surprising himself. “I don't think it has to do with a house, at least not this house, anyway. Whatever is wrong here, it's all around us, in the air, in the ground. Yeah,” he nodded, suddenly having realized. “In the ground. I think that's it, Patty. It's in the ground, the earth. It's something that's been here a long, long time. Our house just happens to be here; just like we are."
"Will it go away? Will it leave us alone?"
She had him here. With most little kids, like Ronnie's little brother, you could pretty much just tell them anything, and they'd usually buy it, but not Patty. Their dad always liked to say: “She's sharp as a tack, that one.” Lee knew he was right. Lee really didn't want to try to lie to Patty just to make her feel better, not after what they had gone through together the other night. He looked her straight in the eye. “I don't think so, Patty."
"What are we going to do, Lee?” She seemed again on the verge of tears. “Mamma won't never let us move away. She ... she likes it here."
"We're going to stick together, all of us. That's what we're going to do.” He reached out and lightly pinched her nose just as he did when she was really little and he would tease her he had stolen the tip between his forefinger and thumb. “We can be strong, too, you know. Most things can't hurt us if we don't let ‘em. Remember what President Roosevelt said about the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. I know he wasn't talking about ghosts, but there's truth in what he said. Our fear can be our own worst enemy. I mean really, what can a ghost do except scare you?"
Patty swallowed. Lee saw her whole neck move. “It can pick you up off the ground and try to drag you off. It would have, too if you hadn't held on to me.” Patty's trembling look told him she didn't agree at all with President Roosevelt. “I get so scared, Lee. I can't help it. I'm not strong like you or Daddy. I'm just a little girl."
"Then you come to me when you're scared. We can be scared together and we can be brave for each other. But that's the best we can do, Squirt. I think that's the best anyone can ever do. But I think that's the key. Whatever it is: ghost, monster, thing from the past, it's a coward, nothing but a big bully. If you fight back it'll go pick on someone who won't."
She came back at a whisper. “Like the two little colored girls?"
"We don't know that for sure,” he replied. “We don't know what happened to them."
Even at her young age, Lee could see from Patty's very adult and stoically stony expression that she bought into his answer even less that he did. Lee picked up the book. “What do you say we get back to some reading? That prince was in a pretty big pickle just a little while ago."
Patty nodded vigorously. “I like it when you read to me."
"I've got an idea,” he said. “Come over here and get on my lap. We'll read together."
Patty answered hesitantly. “I can't read good yet. Least not big books, like you."
"Sure you can.” Holding the book to his chest, Lee patted his lap with the other hand. “We'll do it together, you and me."
Patty brightened; her face was such an open book. As with her tears, all traces of her fear from moments ago had vanished. She scooted over and fell into Lee's lap making him exhale with a playful, “Oof,” and giggling as she settled in.
Lee pointed at a line on the page. “What's that word?"
"I don't know."
"What's the first letter?"
"P!” she shouted out.
"Okay.” Lee pointed at the illustration. “Who's in that picture?"
"A princess!"
"See!” Lee nodded. “Now what's that word?"
Patty ran her finger across the letters, saying them and blending the sounds. She beamed back at her brother. “Princess!” she called out.
"See,” he smiled. “Nothing to it. Piece of cake. We can do anything if we do it together.” He tickled her, causing her to giggle and squirm. “Look out ghosts, it's Patty and Lee!"
The two of them spent the rest of the afternoon together, until Maggie came in and broke it up to tell them that dinner was ready. Later that night, when he went to his room, he was tempted to lie back in his bed and spend some time really looking into the eye. For some reason he was sure he could see what was in there if he only looked hard and deep enough. The whole compulsion of wanting to look in was so odd. Awhile back, Art had come up with a spyglass, given to him, he said, by one of his mother's boyfriends. If you looked in and held it up to a light you could see a girl. If you turned the angle you were looking, just slightly, her dress disappeared. But the thing was cheap, and you had to hold it just so or everything was distorted. To some extent, the fact that he felt compelled to see down into the bottom of the iris was suspicious in itself. After all, what could really be down there? Yet even thinking about the eye caused his fingertips to recall that roundness, that ultra smoothness, the heavy heft, almost like an addiction.
Lee almost did. It was late, after midnight. He'd marked his place in the Norse mythology book and was sitting on the edge of his bed holding the eye, rolling it around in his palm. In this light, the patina looked especially yellow, not white at all. To his side, on the wall was the picture of his mother in her cheerleader's outfit. He found himself looking at her. She was so beautiful. She looked so energetic, so happy. He looked back to the eye, and then to his window. Patty's words about a thing being outside in the dark, its face pressed to the glass, came flooding back to him. A lot of their conversation had seemed to stay with him.
>
He had his blinds angled, but open to allow for the draft of the attic fan. He looked out, deeply, forcing himself to look. If there was something there he couldn't see it. He looked back to the eye. Maybe because his own toes felt a bit of a sudden tingly chill, or maybe because he knew, deep down, there was sometimes much more to fear than fear itself. He got up and put the eye in his drawer, with his other treasures. He stripped off his pajama bottoms and was wearing only a pair of underwear as the humidity was terrible after the long rains, and it was sticky hot even with the fan's breeze. At the doorway, he had this brief flash that maybe he should close his door, but it was too muggy, Maggie's peeping be damned. He switched off the light, and quickly got into bed not using any covers, not even the sheet. The angled blinds kept up a constant flutter, and he found himself again and again looking outside trying in vain to fall asleep without dwelling too much about what might be outside or inside.
CHAPTER THIREE: THE FOURTH OF JULY
The Fourth of July was one of those days that just feels special. Like Christmas or your own birthday, it has a natural excitement all its own. Technically, today was a Monday, but the Fourth of July is always anything but a Monday.
At breakfast even Maggie was perky. She'd made a holiday breakfast and had even cooked extra large pancakes to go with the hash browns, grits, and sausage. Early, Ted had hung the big American flag off the porch eaves, and as they ate, Lee could see it through the front window, wafting about in the slight breeze.
"You're going over to Ronnie's?” Lee's dad asked, pouring himself another cup of coffee.
Lee's mouth was too full to speak, so he nodded.
Ted leaned back in his chair, tipping it back on two legs. “We probably won't be back from the party over at Ed's until late. Do you have your new key?"
Lee produced the shiny new key from his pocket. It worked all the new locks including the additional deadbolts.
"Do you think I should call and talk to Ronnie's mom?” Maggie asked Ted, disregarding Lee.
Evil Heights, Book IV: In the Pit Page 4