by Anne Bishop
"No."
"Don't you know the answer?"
"Whether I know the answer or not is beside the point. It's not something a man discusses with a young girl."
"But you know the answer."
Daemon growled.
"If I were older, would you tell me?" Jaenelle persisted.
There might be a way out of this yet. "Yes, if you were older."
"How old?"
"What?"
"How old would I have to be?"
"Nineteen," he said quickly, beginning to relax. Who knew what sort of questions she might have in seven years, but at least he wouldn't have to answer this one.
"Nineteen?"
Daemon's stomach fluttered. He walked a little faster. The pleased way she said that made him distinctly uncomfortable.
"The Priest said he wouldn't tell me until I was twenty-five," Jaenelle said happily, "but you'll tell me six years sooner."
Daemon skidded to a stop. His eyes narrowed as he regarded the happy, upturned face and clear sapphire eyes. "You asked the Priest?"
Jaenelle looked a little uncomfortable, which made him feel a little better. "Well . . . yes."
Daemon imagined Saetan trying to deal with the same question and fought the urge to laugh. He cleared his throat and tried to look stern. "Do you always ask me the same questions you ask him?"
"It depends on whether or not I get an answer."
Daemon clamped his teeth together in order to keep a wonderfully pithy response from escaping. "I see," he said in a strangled voice. He started walking again.
Jaenelle skipped ahead to examine some leaves. "Sometimes I ask lots of people the same question."
His head hurt. "What do you do if you don't get the same answer?"
"Think about it."
"Mother Night," he muttered.
Jaenelle gathered some of the leaves and then frowned. "There are some questions I'm not allowed to ask again until I'm a hundred. I don't think that's fair, do you?"
Yes!
"I mean," she continued, "how am I supposed to learn anything if people won't tell me?"
"There are some questions that shouldn't be asked until a person is mature enough to appreciate the answers."
Jaenelle stuck her tongue out at him. He responded in kind.
"Just because you're a little older than me doesn't mean you have to be so bossy," she complained.
Daemon looked over his shoulder to see if anyone else was around. There wasn't, so that meant she was referring to him. When did he change from being an elder to being just a little older . . . and bossy?
Impertinent chit. Maddening, impossible . . . how did the Priest stand it? How . . .
Daemon put on his best smile, which was difficult since his teeth were still clenched. "Are you seeing the Priest today?"
Jaenelle frowned at him, suspicious. "Yes."
"Would you give him a message?"
Her eyes narrowed. "All right," she said cautiously. "Come on, I've got some paper in my room."
As Jaenelle waited outside his room, Daemon penned his question and sealed the envelope. She eyed it, shrugged, and slipped it into the pocket of her coat. They parted then, he to escort Alexandra on her morning visits, and she to her lessons.
Saetan looked up from his book. "Aren't you supposed to be with Andulvar?" he asked as Jaenelle bounced into his public study. He and Andulvar had decided that, under the guise of studying Eyrien weapons, Andulvar would teach her physical self-defense while he concentrated on Craft weaponry.
"Yes, but I wanted to give you this first." She handed him a plain white envelope. "Is Prothvar going to be helping with the lesson?"
"I imagine so," Saetan replied, studying the envelope.
Jaenelle wrinkled her nose. "Boys play rough, don't they?"
He's pushing because he's afraid for you, witch-child. "Yes, I guess they do. Go on now."
She gave him a choke-hold hug. "Will I see you after?"
He kissed her cheek. "Just try to leave without seeing me."
She grinned and bounced out of the room.
Saetan turned the envelope over and over in his hands before finally, carefully, opening the flap. He took out the single sheet of paper, read it, read it again . . . and began to laugh.
When she returned and had plundered her way through the sandwich and nut-cakes that were waiting for her, Saetan handed her the envelope, resealed with black wax. She stuffed it into her pocket, tactfully showing no curiosity about this exchange between himself and Daemon.
After she left, he sat in his chair, a smile tugging at his lips, and wondered what his fine young Prince would do with his answer.
Daemon was helping Alexandra into her cloak when Jaenelle popped into the hallway. He'd spent the day teetering between curiosity and apprehension, regretting his impulsiveness at sending that message. Now he and Alexandra were on their way to the theater, and it wasn't the right time or place to ask Jaenelle about the message.
"You look wonderful, Alexandra," Jaenelle said as she admired the elegant dress.
Alexandra smiled, but her brow puckered in a little frown. It always annoyed her that Jaenelle persisted in addressing everyone on a first-name basis. Except him. "Thank you, dear," she said a bit stiffly. "Shouldn't you be in bed by now?"
"I just wanted to say good night," Jaenelle said politely, but Daemon noticed the slight shift in her expression, the sadness beneath the child mask. He also noticed that she said nothing to him.
They were on their way out the door when he suddenly felt something in his jacket pocket. Slipping his fingers inside, he felt the edge of the envelope, and his throat tightened.
He spent the whole evening surreptitiously touching the envelope, wanting to find an excuse to be alone for a minute so he could pull it out. Years of self-control and discipline asserted themselves, and it wasn't until he left Alexandra drifting into a satisfied sleep and was in his own room that he allowed himself to look at it.
He stared at the black wax. The Priest had read it, then. He licked his lips, took a deep breath, and broke the seal.
The writing was strong, neat, and masculine with an archaic flourish. He read the reply, read it again . . . and began to laugh.
Daemon had written: "What do you do when she asks a question no man would give a child an answer to?"
Saetan had replied: "Hope you're obliging enough to answer it for me. However, if you're backed into a corner, refer her to me. I've become accustomed to being shocked."
Daemon grinned, shook his head, and hid the note among his private papers. That night, and for several nights after, he fell asleep smiling.
2—Terreille
Frowning, Daemon stood beneath the maple tree in the alcove. He had seen Jaenelle come in here a few minutes ago, could sense that she was very nearby, but he couldn't find her. Where . . .
A branch shook above his head. Daemon looked up and swallowed hard to keep his heart from leaping past his teeth. He swallowed again—hard—to keep down the tongue-lashing that was blistering his throat in its effort to escape. All that swallowing made his head hurt. As his nostrils flared in an effort to breathe and his breath puffed white in the cold air, Jaenelle let out her silvery velvet-coated laugh.
"Dragons can do that even if it isn't cold," she said gaily as she looked down at him from the lowest branch, a good eight feet above his head. She squatted on the branch with her arms around her knees and no discernible way to save herself if she overbalanced.
Daemon wasn't interested in dragons, and his heart was no longer trying to leap out—it was trying to crawl into his stomach and hide.
"Would you mind coming down from there, Lady?" he said, astounded that his voice sounded so casual. "Heights make me a bit queasy."
"Really?" Jaenelle's eyebrows lifted in surprise. She shrugged, stood up, and leaped.
Daemon jumped forward to catch her, pulled himself back in time, and was rewarded by having a muscle in his back spasm in protest. He watc
hed, wide-eyed, as she drifted down as gracefully as the leaves dancing around her, finally settling on the grass a few feet from him.
Daemon straightened up, winced as the muscle spasmed again, and looked at the tree. Stay calm. If you yell at her, she won't answer any questions.
He took a deep breath, puffed it out. "How did you get up there?"
She gave him an unsure-but-game smile. "The same way I got down."
Daemon sighed and sat down on the iron bench that circled the tree. "Mother Night," he muttered as he leaned his head against the tree and closed his eyes.
There was a long silence. He knew she was watching him, fluffing her hair as she tried to puzzle out his seemingly strange behavior.
"Don't you know how to stand on air, Prince?" Jaenelle asked hesitantly, as though she was trying not to offend him.
Daemon opened his eyes a crack. He could see his knees—and her feet. He sat up slowly and studied the feet planted firmly on nothing. "It would seem I missed that lesson," he said dryly. "Could you show me?"
Jaenelle hesitated, suddenly turning shy.
"Please?" He hated the wistfulness in his voice. He hated feeling so vulnerable. She'd begun to make some excuse, but that note in his voice stopped her, made her look at him closely. He had no idea what she saw in his face. He only knew he felt raw and naked and helpless under the steady gaze of those sapphire eyes.
Jaenelle smiled shyly. "I could try." She hesitated. "I've never tried to teach a grown-up before."
"Grown-ups are just like children, only bigger," Daemon said brightly, snapping to his feet.
She sighed, her expression one of harried amusement. "Up here," she said as she stood on the iron bench.
Daemon stepped up beside her.
"Can you feel the bench under your feet?"
Indeed he could. It was a cold day that promised snow by morning, and he could feel the cold from the iron bench seeping up through his shoes. "Yes."
"You have to really feel the bench."
"Lady," Daemon said dryly, "I really feel the bench."
Jaenelle wrinkled her nose at him. "Well, all you have to do is extend the bench all the way across the alcove. You step"—she placed one foot forward and it looked as if she was stepping on something solid—"and you continue to feel the bench. Like this." She brought the other foot forward so that she was standing on the air at exactly the same height as the bench. She looked at him over her shoulder.
Daemon took a deep breath, puffed it out. "Right." He imagined the bench extending before him, put one foot out, placed it on the air, and pitched forward since there was nothing beneath him. His foot squarely hit the hard ground, jarring him from his ankle to his ears.
He brought his other foot to the ground and gingerly tested his ankle. It would be a little sore, but it was still sound. He kept his back half turned from her as he ground his teeth, waiting for the insolent giggle he'd heard in so many other courts when he'd been maneuvered into looking foolish. He was furious for failing, furious because of the sudden despair he felt that she would think him an inadequate companion.
He had forgotten that Jaenelle was Jaenelle.
"I'm sorry, Daemon," said a wavering, whispery voice behind him. "I'm sorry. Are you hurt?"
"Only my pride," Daemon said as he turned around, his lips set in a rueful smile. "Lady?" Then, alarmed. "Lady! Jaenelle, no, darling, don't cry." He gathered her into his arms while her shoulders shuddered with the effort not to make a sound. "Don't cry," Daemon crooned as he stroked her hair. "Please don't cry. I'm not hurt. Honestly I'm not." Since her face was buried against his chest, he allowed himself a pained smile as he kissed her hair. "I guess I'm too much of a grown-up to learn magic."
"No, you're not," Jaenelle said, pushing away from him and scrubbing the tears off her face with the backs of her hands. "I've just never tried to explain it to anyone before."
"Well, there you are," he said too brightly. "If you've never shown anyone—"
"Oh, I've shown lots of my other friends," Jaenelle said brusquely. "I've just never tried to explain it."
Daemon was puzzled. "How did you show them?"
Instantly he felt her pull away from him. Not physically—she hadn't moved—but within.
Jaenelle glanced at him nervously before ducking behind her veil of hair. "I . . . touched . . . them so they could understand."
The ember in his loins that had been warming him ever since the first time he saw her flared briefly and subsided. To touch her, mind to mind, to get beneath the shadows . . . He would never have dared suggest it, would never have dared make the first overture until she was much, much older. But now. Even to connect with her, just briefly, inside the first inner barrier—ah, to touch Jaenelle.
Daemon's mouth watered.
There was the risk, of course. Even if she initiated the touch, it might be too soon. He was what he was, and even at the first barrier there was the swirl of anger and predatory cunning that was the Warlord Prince called Daemon Sadi. And he was male, full grown. That, too, would be evident.
Daemon took a deep breath. "If you're afraid of hurting me by the touch, I—"
"No," she said quickly. She closed her eyes, and he could sense her hurting. "It's just that I'm . . . different . . . and some people, when I've touched them . . ." Her voice trailed away, and he understood.
Wilhelmina. Wilhelmina, who loved her sister and was glad to have her back, had, for some reason, rejected that oh-so-personal touch.
"Just because some people think you're different—"
"No, Daemon," Jaenelle said gently, looking up at him with her ancient, wistful, haunted eyes. "Everyoneknows I'm different. It just doesn't matter to some—and it matters a lot to others." A tear slipped down her cheek. "Why am I different?"
Daemon looked away. Oh, child. How could he explain that she was dreams made flesh? That for some of them, she made the blood in their veins sing? That she was a kind of magic the Blood hadn't seen in so very, very long? "What does the Priest say?"
Jaenelle sniffed. "He says growing up is hard work."
Daemon smiled sympathetically. "It is that."
"He says every living thing struggles to emerge from its cocoon or shell in order to be what it was meant to be. He says to dance for the glory of Witch is to celebrate life. He says it's a good thing we're all different or Hell would be a dreadfully boring place."
Daemon laughed, but he wasn't about to be sidetracked. "Teach me." It was an arrogant command softened only by the gentle way he said it.
She was there. Instantly. But in a way he'd never experienced before. He felt her sense his confusion, felt her cry of despair at his reaction.
"Wait," Daemon said sharply, raising one hand. "Wait."
Jaenelle was still linked to him. He felt the quick beating of her heart, the nervous breathing. Cautiously, he explored.
She wasn't inside the first barrier, where thoughts and feelings were open for perusal, and yet this was more than the simple inner communication link the Blood used. And it was more than the physical monitoring he usually did in bed. This was sharing physical experience. He felt her hair brushing against her cheek as if it were his own, felt the texture of her dress against her skin.
Oh, the possibilities of this kind of link during . . .
"Okay," he said after a while, "I think I've got the feel of it. Now what?" His face burned as she watched him warily.
At last she said, "Now we walk on air."
It was queer to feel that his legs were both long and short, and it took him a couple of tries to stand on the bench again. Amused, he just shook his head at her puzzled expression. Naturally, if all the other friends had been children, they were probably all close to the same age and the same size. And the same gender? He pushed that thought away before he had time to feel jealous.
After that, it was amazingly simple, and he reveled in it. He learned by experiencing her movements. It was similar to floating an object on air, except you did it t
o yourself. They practiced straight walking parading around the alcove. Next came straight up and down. Pretending to climb stairs took longer to get the hang of, since he wanted a distance more compatible with his own legs and kept tripping on nothing.
Then the link was gone, and he was standing on air, alone, with Jaenelle watching him, her eyes shining with pride and pleasure. When he lowered himself to the ground with a graceful flourish, she clapped her hands in delight.
Daemon opened his arms. Jaenelle skated to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. He held her tightly, his face buried in her hair. "Thank you," he said hoarsely. "Thank you."
"You're welcome, Daemon." Her voice was a lovely, sensuous caress.
Holding her so close, with his lips so near her neck, he didn't want to let her go, but caution finally won over desire.
He didn't push her away. Rather, he gently held her shoulders and stepped back. "We'd better get back before someone comes looking."
Jaenelle's happy glow dimmed. She carelessly dropped to the ground. "Yes." She looked at the bed of witchblood. "Yes." She walked out of the alcove, not waiting for him.
Daemon stayed for another minute. Better not to come in together. Better not to make it obvious. To keep her safe, he had to be careful.
He glanced at the witchblood and bolted from the alcove. As he glided along the garden paths, his face settled into its familiar cold mask, the happiness he'd felt a few minutes before honing the blade of his temper so sharp he could have made the air bleed.
If you sing to them correctly, they'll tell you the names of the ones who are gone.
Everything has a price.
Whatever the price, whatever he had to do, he would make sure one of those plants wasn't for her.
3—Terreille
Daemon pulled the bright, deep-red sweater over his head and adjusted the collar of the gold-and-white-checked shirt. Satisfied, he studied his reflection. His eyes were butter melted by humor and good spirits, his face subtly altered by the relaxed, boyish grin. The change in his appearance startled him, but after a moment he just shook his head and brushed his hair.
The difference was Jaenelle and the incalculable ways she worried, intrigued, fascinated, incensed, and delighted him. More than that, now, when he was so long past it, she was giving him—the bored, jaded Sadist—a childhood. She colored the days with magic and wonder, and all the things he'd ceased to pay attention to he saw again new.