by Tess Stimson
‘Can I have some?’ Bella asks her mother.
Louise jumps, as if miles away. ‘Yes, if you’d like,’ she says absently.
I don’t know if it’s too much wine with dinner, or my preoccupation with what I have to do, and why. The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. ‘You can’t drink when you’re pregnant,’ I tell Bella unthinkingly.
I want to snatch back the words, rewind, but it’s too late. Everyone turns to Bella, eyes wide with shock. Even Celia is rendered speechless.
‘I’m not pregnant!’ Bella cries. ‘I’m not,’ she repeats, as the horrified silence stretches.
‘Of course she’s not!’ Louise exclaims furiously. ‘I’m sorry, Bella,’ she adds, shoving back her chair, ‘I’ve tried to be understanding, I really have, but this is the final straw. I can’t be in the same room as this woman at the moment. She’s either wicked or insane. I don’t want to spoil your evening, Mum, but I have to get some air. I’ll see you in the morning.’
Bella stares at me, her face white, trembling with anger and betrayal. For a moment, I think she’s going to say something, but she simply takes Taylor’s hand and the two of them leave without a word. I feel sick to my stomach as everyone else follows them. I have only ever wanted to help Bella. She will never forgive me for this.
But forgiveness isn’t important. Saving Bella from her monster of a father is the only thing that matters.
I slip back to the dining room and go over to our table, still cluttered with our dirty plates and glasses. There’s no one to notice me palm the steak knife Louise was using, with her fingerprints all over it, and slip it into my bag.
LOUISE PAGE
PART 1 OF RECORDED INTERVIEW
Date:- 25/07/2020
Duration:- 51 Minutes
Location:- Kingsbridge Police Station
Conducted by Officers from Devon & Cornwall Police
(cont.)
POLICE
So that was the last time you saw your ex-husband alive? On the beach last night?
LP
Yes.
POLICE
What time was that?
LP
I don’t know. About eleven p.m.?
POLICE
You didn’t see him at breakfast this morning?
LP
No. I didn’t see him till I went to the Beach House and … and found him— [Sobbing.]
POLICE
You have my deepest sympathies, Mrs Page. Can I get you anything? Are you in pain?
POLICE
The doctor has already seen her about her arm, sir. He said Mrs Page is fit for interview.
LP
Please, can we do this later? I need to be with my children. They’ve just lost their father— [Sobbing.]
POLICE
I’m so sorry, Mrs Page. We’ll make this as quick as possible, but we do need to talk to you now, while everything’s still fresh in your mind.
LP
I’m never going to be able to forget it.
POLICE
So sorry, but just to clarify, Mr Page didn’t come up to the hotel at all?
LP
I didn’t see either of them all morning.
POLICE
‘Them’ meaning Andrew and Caroline Page?
LP
Yes.
POLICE
Were you surprised not to see them?
LP
Not after last night. Andrew often goes for a run in the morning, and I kind of assumed Caz was just staying out of everyone’s way. [Pause.] We were all pretty upset after what she said.
POLICE
The comment to your daughter?
LP
Yes.
POLICE
Was Mr Page upset with his wife?
LP
I don’t know.
POLICE
You didn’t discuss it when you talked shortly afterwards?
LP
No.
POLICE
What did you talk about, then?
LP
Nothing, really. [Pause.] Just plans for my parents’ party the next day. My mother had asked him to say a few words, and he wanted some anecdotes to use in his toast.
POLICE
Your mother had asked your ex-husband to give a toast, rather than your brother? Did that strike you as odd?
LP
No. Luke’s very shy, but Andrew’s used to public speaking. And he is – was – really close to Mum. Oh, God. [Sobs.] Sorry. I’m OK.
POLICE
Did you and Mr Page go to the beach together last night?
LP
No, I left the hotel first. I wanted to clear my head. Andrew joined me on the beach five or ten minutes later.
POLICE
And what about when you returned to the hotel? Were you together then?
LP
I came back first. I wanted to check Tolly was in bed. Anyway, I was staying in the main hotel and Andrew was at the Beach House, so we were going in different directions.
POLICE
Did you see anyone else on your way back to the hotel?
LP
No. Everyone had gone to bed.
POLICE
Including Mrs Page?
LP
I don’t know. I didn’t see her.
POLICE
Why did you go down to the Beach House this morning?
LP
[Silence.]
POLICE
Mrs Page?
LP
I needed to talk to Andrew.
POLICE
What about?
LP
[Pause.] Our daughter. I thought Caz was at the beach, so it’d be a good time to catch him.
POLICE
What made you think she was at the beach?
LP
I saw her. Well, I thought I saw her. She has a bright red bikini, you can’t miss it.
POLICE
You admit you wanted to get your ex-husband on his own?
LP
It’s no secret Caz and I don’t get on. Things have been … [Pause.] I just thought it’d be better if she wasn’t there. I went down to the Beach House— [Sobs.] I’m sorry. I can’t.
POLICE
It’s OK. I know this is upsetting, Mrs Page, but I need you to tell me exactly what happened next.
LP
[Sobbing.]
POLICE
Would you like some tissues?
LP
Yes, thank you. I’m sorry. [Pause.] I just keep seeing him lying there.
POLICE
When you got to the Beach House, did you knock on the door?
LP
No. I was going to, but I heard shouting from inside, and realised Caz was there after all, so I stopped.
POLICE
You heard raised voices? Could you tell whose they were?
LP
Andrew and Caz.
POLICE
You’re sure about that? Mr Page was alive when you first arrived at the Beach House?
LP
Yes.
POLICE
Could you make out what they were saying?
LP
Not really. I mean, they were angry. I could hear bits of it. It was mainly Caz. ‘How could you?’ that sort of thing.
POLICE
Did you have any idea what she meant?
LP
No.
POLICE
What did you do?
LP
I didn’t want to get in the middle of it, so I started to go back up to the hotel. I was about halfway back, and then I heard a scream.
POLICE
Was it a man or a woman?
LP
It sounded like a woman, but it might have been Andrew. I don’t know, I’ve never heard a man scream before. It was terrible. I kind of froze, at first. And then I heard another scream, and I ran back, and then when I went in—
POLICE
The door was unlocked?
>
LP
It must have been. I ran in and saw … and saw … [Sobs.]
POLICE
Just take your time, Mrs Page.
LP
I’m so sorry. [Pause.] Andrew was on the floor, and Caz was holding a knife, kind of bent over him. There was blood everywhere. And then she just kind of came at me.
POLICE
She attacked you?
LP
I tried to get to Andrew, to see if he was all right, and I must have slipped on the … on the blood – that must’ve been when I hurt my arm – and I was trying to get the knife away from Caz, I was screaming. It all happened so quickly.
POLICE
Did you actually see Mrs Page stab her husband?
LP
He was already on the floor when I got there. If I’d been [inaudible] maybe I could’ve … [Sobs.]
POLICE
Was anyone else there?
LP
No.
POLICE
And you didn’t see anyone else enter or leave the Beach House?
LP
No. She killed him! Ask her! Go on!
POLICE
The thing is, Mrs Page. She tells us exactly the same story as you, with one important difference. She says you’re the one who killed him.
Chapter 42
Louise
It is the way she makes his coffee that gives it away. She doesn’t ask him how he takes it, she simply makes it with the merest dash of cream and two sugars, exactly the way Andrew likes it, the kind of way you would only know if you had done it many times before, the kind of way you would do if you knew someone intimately.
As I watch her hand him the cup and saucer, I know, in that second, and without a shadow of a doubt: Bella was telling the truth when she said it was Taylor in trouble, not her. And the father, the predatory married father who got a seventeen-year-old schoolgirl pregnant, is Andrew.
That’s what he meant when he came to my house and said he’d been a fool. That’s who he’s been having an affair with: his daughter’s teenage best friend.
I’m almost grateful when Caz’s faux pas breaks my shocked paralysis. Seizing the excuse, I flee the hotel and race along the cliff top, heedless of where I’m going. I’m grateful for the full moon that illuminates the path, finding my way across the rocks and down to the lagoon almost by instinct. There is something primeval about the sound of the waves crashing on the shore in the darkness, the tang of salt in the air, and I stand on the empty beach and let the sound sweep through me, riding the tide of my anger, the release so intense it’s almost erotic.
Now that I know, I can’t imagine how I didn’t see it before. It was all too evident in the furtive, guilty glances Andrew was throwing Taylor all evening. It was written all over the girl’s pale, lovesick face whenever she looked at him. But it’s obvious Bella has no idea what’s gone on between them, and I hope to God it stays that way. The double betrayal would break her heart.
Andrew’s always liked women: women, not girls. He’s never been able to say no to a pretty face. But Taylor is just a teenager! She’s thirty years younger than he is! I know he’s a narcissist, but this is a low watermark, even for him. Their relationship may be legal, but morally and ethically, he’s just put himself beyond the pale for every parent I know.
I don’t hear Andrew come up behind me, and jump when I turn and see him standing just feet away. We stare at each other for a long moment in silence. He can tell instantly from my expression that I know. You don’t live with someone for the best part of a decade and a half and not learn to read in their face that the past has caught up with you.
Fear, guilt and calculation play across Andrew’s features, but I realise suddenly I haven’t once seen surprise since Caz’s gaffe. Not shock. He must have known about Taylor’s pregnancy already. The son-of-a-bitch. He knew, and instead of taking some responsibility and helping Taylor decide what to do, or at least paying for the poor girl’s abortion, he left her to figure it out alone. All he cares about now is that he doesn’t get caught. I don’t think I’ve ever hated anyone more than I hate him in this moment.
‘Get away from me,’ I say, my voice hard and unforgiving.
‘Lou, let me explain—’
‘There is nothing you can say,’ I bite, ‘nothing that excuses this.’
I can’t imagine how I ever found him attractive. There is no substance to him, nothing of any worth. The precise qualities that make him such a brilliant television presenter also conceal the fact that he’s an appalling human being.
‘I’ve been an idiot, I know that,’ Andrew pleads. ‘You don’t know, Lou, you weren’t there. It wasn’t something I planned. If I could take it back, I swear to God I would. It was the biggest mistake of my life.’ He realises from my stony expression his opening mea culpa gambit isn’t working, and abruptly changes tack, his tone freighted now with accusation. ‘Look, we all make mistakes. You let me think I was Tolly’s father when—’
‘Taylor is seventeen!’ I interrupt angrily. ‘She’s still a child!’
‘She knew what she was doing,’ he says, a sullen sneer creeping into his voice. ‘It wasn’t her first time, trust me.’
My fury and outrage boil over. I slap his face, hard, and even in the darkness I can see the red imprint my hand has left. ‘Don’t you dare!’ I shout. ‘You did this! She’s the same age as your daughter! That’s not an affair, it’s abuse! How would you feel if one of your friends had done this to Bella?’
He looks repelled. ‘Don’t be disgusting.’
‘Can you hear yourself?’ I demand incredulously. ‘How could you, Andrew? She’s still at school! How could you ever think this was OK?’
Finally, he has the grace to look discomforted. ‘Look, it just happened a few times,’ he mutters. ‘She was always hanging around, making eyes at me. She asked me to show her around the studios, but she made it clear what she really wanted. It’s not like the girl wasn’t willing.’ He rubs the side of his face with an injured air. ‘Fuck, you could have broken my nose, Louise. I can’t go to work on Monday with my face like—’
I swear to God, if we were on the cliff top instead of the beach, I’d push him off. ‘You got that girl pregnant,’ I hiss. ‘And then you left her to cope with it on her own. Bella paid for her to have a termination, did you know that? Your sixteen-year-old daughter had to arrange to abort her own half-brother or sister! Can you imagine what that’ll do to her if she ever finds out?’
‘She won’t unless you tell her,’ Andrew says sulkily. ‘The problem’s sorted now, isn’t it? The girl will get over it. I’ve told her we’re finished. I don’t know why she’s here this weekend, to be honest. She’d better not be thinking about telling Caz,’ he adds nastily. ‘Now she’s got rid of it, it’ll be her word against mine.’
I literally have no words. The man has no shame or remorse. I never thought I’d pity Caz, but I do now, married to this amoral bastard.
‘Taylor is a child,’ I repeat bitterly. ‘You can’t rely on her to keep your secret forever. I’m not even sure she should.’
‘Look, Lou. I get it,’ Andrew says quickly. ‘But there’s no need to be jealous. She honestly didn’t mean a thing. It was just a stupid fling.’ He takes a step towards me, pouring every ounce of charm he can muster into his gaze. ‘You’re the only woman I’ve ever cared—’
‘Stop,’ I interrupt, sick to my stomach. ‘Just stop. I don’t want to hear it. Stay away from Taylor or you’ll have me to deal with.’
I leave him standing on the shore, filled with a loathing so visceral I can taste its acrid bitterness at the back of my throat. I feel dirty by association, as if I need to go home and scrub myself clean. I slept with this man just a few days ago! I enabled him, as I have done for so many years. That makes me part of his grimy story.
My foot hits a loose stone, and I slip, my ankle turning as I stumble. It takes me a moment to regain my balance, and when I do, I suddenly see my mother hidde
n in the shadows of the cliff.
‘Mum! You startled me,’ I exclaim. ‘What are you doing down here?’
‘I was worried about you,’ my mother says. Her delicate gold scarf flutters behind her in the breeze. ‘You disappeared. Min said she thought you’d gone down to the beach, so I came to see everything was all right. This path can be dangerous, especially at night.’
Her expression is unreadable, but there’s something in her eyes that gives me pause. Voices carry across the water. What might she have heard?
‘How long have you been there?’ I ask her.
‘Long enough,’ Mum says.
CAROLINE PAGE
PART 1 OF RECORDED INTERVIEW
Date:- 25/07/2020
Duration:- 48 Minutes
Location:- Kingsbridge Police Station
Conducted by Officers from Devon & Cornwall Police
(cont.)
POLICE
Are you sure you’re all right to continue, Mrs Page?
CP
I’m fine.
POLICE
You’re not in any pain—
CP
I said, I’m fine. Can we please get on with this?
POLICE
You’d gone for a swim, you said. Can anyone else confirm that?