“I’ll forward the scans to you right away,” Denny said.
Mike said his goodbyes, not only with the coaches, but also his fellow MMA enthusiasts. His crew followed along, interacting with the energized crowd. Demon endured the attention with good humor, despite loathing being patted and petted.
“This shows we can’t even go to MMA practice without a confrontation,” Denny said. “This C.A.I.R. group may need some extra attention. We’ll find out who or how they know where the hell we are. I’m betting they’ve hacked your OnStar, or bugged us in some way. You, D, and Mongo can sense people paying undo attention to us, so I doubt we have a human stalker. I will get on the bug hunt when we get home.”
Chapter Ten
The Offended and the Ruins
“I’m starving,” Demon said. They entered the Buick without engagement from any other people, with all four paranormals looking for unwanted interest. “They’ll have our order ready at Porky’s, right Frodo?”
“Yep. It will be there waiting for us. How are we on Klondike Bars?”
“Good,” Mongo replied. “I’ve kept Bluto in check because of his bulging belly.”
Mike snatched Demon before he could attack Mongo in the backseat. “No fighting. This is good. We only need to get our order at Porky’s. I’m with D. I need sustenance. At least confrontations there don’t happen. We’re in and out quickly.”
When they reached Porky’s Pizza parking lot, a mixture of Sharia Law Mutants and their slave costumed women paraded with signs demanding halal meat on the pizzas. Denny entered the parking lot slowly. One of the protestors tried to block their way. Mike sent the tendrils of darkness to throw the guy into his companions. Denny proceeded to park.
“Stay here, guys. I’ll go in and get the order. If you see me stopped on the way back, let D out to pave my way to the Buick.”
“Send Sandy in, Ripper. You follow along. Then I won’t need to taste blood a second time tonight.”
“D’s right, Mike,” Sandy agreed. “Nazer can go in with me. We’ll get the order easy. You can stay on our six and intercede if the meal is jeopardized.”
“Okay… that sounds like a plan,” Mike admitted. “You two lead. I’ll follow.”
On the way inside Porky’s, Mike shot a tendril of darkness out to knock one of the protestors down. It disrupted the protest long enough for Nazer and Sandy to go inside. Next, he began spinning protestors into each other with their signs. His pizza retrievers nearly made it to the Buick without being stopped. A man confronted them halfway to the parking lot.
“Do you not know how offensive non-halal foods are to true believers?”
“We do,” Naz replied. “We are happy to have offended you. I want a non-halal meal without the torture of animals. Get away from us, or something far more dangerous than being offended will arrive to educate you on what offenses really are.”
Mike entered the picture at that point. “Move away from my friends. I don’t want my friend Naz getting into trouble for kicking your lunatic ass.”
Mike drew the attention then as Sandy and Nazer reached the Buick.
“This place offends Muslims!”
Mike needed to stifle loud amusement before answering. “We don’t care about offending you. We don’t want your halal meals or anything to do with your death cult religion. If you don’t like it here, go back where you came from. If the food at Porky’s offends you, go somewhere else.”
“All must submit to the teachings of Allah’s prophet, Mohammed!”
“Not likely,” Mike replied. “Step back or I’ll make you step back: your choice.”
“You do not scare me! I would cut your throat in a split second of time.”
Mike moved him, unwillingly to the side, adding pain to the mix. “Thanks for getting out of the way, poser. Don’t be mad. Be smart. Gather your other offended dolts and get the hell out of here. Porky’s is a local delight. You and the offended of Islam are brainwashed creatures of shit. Go away.”
The crowd attacked, only to face plant into Mike’s shield. “Hold that thought. If I allow our meal to be ruined, I will be made to repent bigtime.”
Once Nazer and Sandy made it to the Buick, Mike released his surprised attackers away from the front of Porky’s. It took only moments before they tried another assault. Mike moved amongst them, slapping hands, faces, and signs. No one could hit him or grip him. He moved amongst them without stopping for a moment. Soon, more than half of the protesters lie curled on the sidewalk, while others dived there to avoid Mike’s strikes. A huge man exited a van nearby, bushy black hair and half beard, dressed in a flowing white robe. He gestured his apparent minions back.
“I am Imam Mohammed Sousa. I command you to leave this place.”
* * *
In the Buick, universal groans sounded, especially from Demon. “Oh, good Lord… there goes instant meal gratification. Let me out, Mongo. The smell will drive me insane! I’m so hungry, I want to gnaw my own leg off.”
Mongo opened the door. “Be careful, dog.”
“That bearded troll better worry about my meal interruption. I need to keep Ripper from killing him.”
* * *
“I don’t take orders from fourteenth century troglodytes. If you want halal so bad, either find an animal torturing enterprise or the restaurants who buy from them. Why come here, other than acting like an idiot?”
“We shall-”
He didn’t finish because Demon hit him at full launch from the parking lot with enough force to drop the Imam to the sidewalk. Demon tore at the man’s robe’s, ripping them to shreds around his head. Sousa cried out finally.
“Stop… stop… get this unclean animal away from me!”
Demon slimed him without mercy. All Sousa could do was roll from side to side. Nothing could prevent Demon from reaching him. After nearly five minutes of sliming, Sousa began to sob and beg. Demon backed off with the Muttley snicker.
“He tasted rancid, Ripper. Wrap this up and let me get the taste out of my mouth.”
Mike gestured at the protestors. “Anyone else have delusions of grandeur? I will hurt any who attack us.”
No one in the crowd moved. Mike yanked the imam to his feet. “Move along and allow the locals to enjoy Porky’s Pizza.”
For the second time, Mike was the target of a throat grab. On his knees with pain lancing through his entire body, Sousa cried out for Mike to stop. Releasing him, Mike gestured toward the street. “Take your herd of honor killing pedophiles, misogynists, slave women, and honor killing wife beaters away from here. We will stop this lunatic protest right now with all the violence needed to send you troglodytes away from tormenting honest citizens.”
“I will fight you for Allah!”
“I thought you were the religion of peace. What’s all this fighting and attempted ransacking of local property have to do with peace, Imam Hypocrite?”
Sousa tried to bull rush Mike, who simply batted away his arms, slapped his face, and finally leg whipped him to the sidewalk. Cheering sounded from the interior of Porky’s, as the owner connected his outside video cams to the many TV monitors inside. Sousa hit the sidewalk hard with an audible grunt of pain. When a few of the crowd watching the Imam’s humiliation tried to push forward toward Mike, they met Demon in Haunt killing mode. He seemed to be everywhere at once, nipping, head butting, and tearing clothing. Mike helped the Imam to his feet.
“I…I will kill you for this outrage. Soon, I will have you at my mercy. Then… we shall see who should stay and who should go.”
Mike slapped Imam Sousa to the sidewalk surface. “Big talk from a white robed fanatic. Go tell it on the mountain. For now, leave while you can still walk.”
Then the Imam began cursing Mike in Arabic, assuming Mike would not know what he said. He ended the curses with an order to his followers. “We shall go and make plans at the Mosque. I know this kafir and his dog. They are marked for death by the Council. Come… let us leave for now.”
&n
bsp; Mike did not betray his knowledge of Arabic. Since gaining his powers from Haunt DNA, he could absorb all within any person’s mind that he entered, their language, skills and their thoughts. Demon functioned the same way to a limited extent.
“We need to find Sousa’s Mosque.”
“We will, D, but right now, we need food.”
“First, I need to gargle with some of your Listerine with peroxide.”
Mike grinned. “Understood. You made him cry.”
“He tasted so bad, he nearly made me cry. I think he’s one of those Sharia Law idiots that wash their faces in camel urine.”
Mike’s face twisted in distaste. “Good Lord… I saw those video clips on Facebook.”
* * *
“I knew we wouldn’t get home without another surprise.” Mike straightened in his seat as Denny drove through the open gate.
“We have a full turnout of the Demon Inc crew,” Denny observed. “D was right about Ms. Kincaid. I streamed our adventures tonight, so, except for Loretta, the others know the score.”
“No matter what, we eat first, talk later.”
“Yes. I will fix Bluto a plate before he passes out,” Mongo said. “We have beer. It goes with pizza, chicken, and spaghetti with meatballs exceptionally well.”
“Amen to that,” Demon agreed. “Do a Baby Groot food delivery, Mongo. Use the angry face and combat cry. Ripper will open the entrance for you from here. That should get Loretta out of the entranceway.”
“How do you know she’s in the entryway, D,” Sandy asked.
“Do not doubt Demon the Magnificent, Sack,” Demon reprimanded her.
Mongo opened the Buick door, changed instantly into Baby Groot, grabbed the food bags, and ran full tilt in Baby Groot combat mode. Mike opened the entryway door. Sure enough, Loretta stood in the doorway, but screamed and ran for cover to escape the Baby Groot food carrier. The Buick occupants needed a few moments of loud hilarity before exiting the Buick. They entered the kitchen where Loretta cringed behind Jerry and Janis. Joanie, who had ridden to Demon Inc with Tom, Laura, and little Mike, shamed Mongo. After arriving as raging Baby Groot, Mongo switched to human form, waving off Joanie, while working instantly on a plate of square cut pizza pieces, cut up spaghetti and meatballs, and stripped from the bone chicken for Demon’s feast. The others lined up with their plates.
“That wasn’t very nice,” Loretta said.
“I knew you’d be blocking the entrance,” Demon said, sniffing his plate with delight. He waited until Mongo poured a beer bowl for him, so he could wash away the taste of Imam. “I needed you out of the way for food delivery.”
Loretta sighed. “Mission accomplished. I saw the videos of your evening at MMA and Porky’s. Do incidents like tonight happen all the time?”
Gail handed her a plate. “It happens in spurts. We have times where everything quiets down, but those drive Demon nuts. We’re in a wild space now. Have something to eat and drink. It helps me not think about paranormal play around here.”
Gail’s dad, Steve, who was behind Loretta, addressed her question too. “Demon Inc destroyed a dimensional threat you know about. They rescue people, fight gangsters, obliterate evil beings like Rayden Kirk, and confront the scourge of Islam. They do it by any means necessary. This confrontation we’ll be talking about tonight with Satanist Lucifer earns the money we need to keep going. Our earnings are through the roof right now, thanks to Laura’s investment strategies and our contracts with the SyFy Channel.”
Steve hesitated for a moment, before addressing Demon. “Would it be accurate to say Demon Inc possibly attracts danger and evil to be confronted, D?”
Demon glanced from his food dish. “I think so, Steve. I believe an aura exists around our paranormal group. It could explain why we find ourselves in the middle of bad situations all the time. Loretta’s ex-boyfriend burglarizing her place, connected other threads leading to the home invasion gang. Drusilla, the witch torturing the little boy in a coma, led us to Kirk and his Golem. Our handling of Kirk led us to a confrontation with Lucifer. Add in gangbangers and brainwashed Islamic death cult members to the mix, and I’d say we attract evil to us. We can handle it.”
“You sure can,” Steve acknowledged. “That’s the story, Loretta.”
“I think I’ll take your daughter’s advice – eat, drink, and accept things here as they happen. I know you have coming events to discuss. Is it okay if I wait and talk with Mike later?”
“You can stay, if it’s okay with Mike,” Steve said. “I’m their agent. Mike’s in charge.”
“If you abide by one simple rule, discuss nothing pertaining to Demon Inc outside Demon Inc, you’re welcome anytime. Luckily, not many survived the experience of having a Haunt inside them. You saw Haunts up close and personal,” Mike told her.
“Denny’s mixture did something to me,” Loretta said. “I don’t feel like one of those things is peeking into my mind.”
“Yeah… but did it erase Mike from your mind,” Demon asked.
“No,” Loretta admitted, sitting across from Mike.
* * *
After cleaning the kitchen, the Demon Inc crew adjourned to their more comfortable conference room. Mike led off the discussion. “You’ve all been briefed about the overnighter in the ruins gig, complete with history, pictures, and paranormal legends. I have no doubt this will be dangerous. Lucifer didn’t pop into our faces to be ignored. He has something he thinks can rip us apart. We have not signed a contract. This vote decides whether we do it or not. Steve has the money information.”
“Lucifer placed a fifty-thousand-dollars with the SyFy Channel. SyFy wants this evening adventure in the worst way, so they added fifty-thousand-dollars more to the mix. They already have an entire show, ready to launch, promoting the confrontation with mixed clips of our prior actions. It also contains the Sutro Baths history, including the devastating fire in the 1960’s. We will earn much more from the shows on SyFy than we will from Lucifer. It will be a lucrative endeavor, and as Mike pointed out, probably a dangerous one.”
“We’re doing great in the money category,” Laura added. “We don’t need to do this.”
“It’s what we do,” Janis said. “We all know this SyFy Channel business thrives on the ‘what have you done for me lately’ rule. We wasted slime demons from hell. I think we can make it through the night no matter what Lucifer throws at us. We know it’s a trap. I’m in.”
Janis’s affirmation echoed around the room with no dissenters.
“Grant and I want to be drivers and equipment handlers,” Tom said. “We know the risks.”
“You’re in,” Mike agreed. “It will be good if you guys can handle equipment transfer with us and guard our vehicle. Steve can concentrate on filming. We need him with us. Anything else on the ruins?”
“Can I go in with you,” Loretta asked.
“Nope. The only ones spending the night in the ruins will be combat tested veterans of the Haunt war, Radalia Dimension battle, and slime demon fights. We fight, and nobody runs,” Mike explained. “If you don’t get in the way, you can help with equipment handling and stay in the Demon Inc equipment van, but it will be an overnighter. We need the van on scene in case of injury.”
“I’d like that.”
“Okay, then… let me move on to our C.A.I.R. problem. Luckily, they’re fixated on me. I think tonight ended the piecemeal, half measures. I believe, like Demon and Mongo, the fighter came with his men to either maim or kill me. I’ve wondered since we found weapons with extra magazines on Butch’s companions, if they planned to kill everyone and escape.”
“I found the Imam’s Masjid. It’s local, but in Hayward. They knew somehow we would be going to Porky’s.” Denny turned his satellite laptop for Mike to see the Masjid. “It’s listed as a Masjid, but it’s in a house. I’m betting the Buick is bugged. I’ll go out and find it. It will give me a chance to try out my new tool. It can sense any signal. I hoped to use it in a refined form to find possib
le dimensional rifts. Be right back.”
“What can we do about C.A.I.R., Mike,” Jerry asked, as Denny left with Joanie to examine the Buick.
“Not much on this except to keep your eyes open. Mongo and I will maybe fly over there and investigate the Masjid tonight. There’s no moon to speak of with the cloud cover. This would be a perfect time to practice my power of flight. We can carry Demon with us.”
“Do you think we should all stay here tonight?”
“I don’t think that’s necessary, Laura. I’ll text everyone with what we find afterwards. I guess we’re done for tonight. I assume you’ll handle the contract, Steve?”
“I will contact SyFy tonight. They assigned a producer for me to contact the moment we decided to go ahead with the project. I’m sure I will have a date for this overnighter by morning.”
“Great.”
Denny rushed back in with a small device in hand, shushing everyone. He showed it to them and then put it outside again. He returned with Joanie. “It was under the driver’s seat, Mike. That gizmo is high tech expensive too. They only needed one of those super-bugs. I scanned the other vehicles. They’re clean.”
“Very cool, Den,” Stan said. “Maybe Super Mongo should fly it out over the ocean.”
“We can do better than that,” Mike said. “We can mislead them whenever we want. Denny will check our vehicles from now on. I must have run in the store without locking the door. It doesn’t take long to plant. That solves our mysterious offended Moslem appearances.”
“I guess we better leave you to it,” Connie said. “We have classes tomorrow, unlike you high school kids.”
“Speaking of which, how did your exit from football go, guys,” Mike asked.
“Like a dream,” Jerry answered. “They arrested two of the main culprits in the locker room hostage taking. The coaches, along with Stan and I, told the police exactly what happened, and promised we’d testify to it in court. The DA already settled it with probation, forfeit of scholarship, and expulsion from school for the two instigators. We signed off on our scholarships being waived for leaving football. I can’t believe what a relief it is.”
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