by Molly Harper, Stephanie Haefner, Liora Blake, Gabra Zackman, Andrea Laurence, Colette Auclair
I’m laughing. Holy shit, I get it. I know what they’re doing. The entire restaurant is watching a scene from My Best Friend’s Wedding being played out. They’re saying the lines from the movie. Badly, but those are the lines from the rehearsal dinner scene.
Everything is forgotten and I’m completely sucked in.
Shane glances around with a broad smile. “I’m sure Bradley looked at the lovely Kensington and in that moment . . . In that exact moment . . .” He’s now looking right at me.
I’m transfixed with a sappy smile plastered on my face.
“He knew he could be in love . . .”
The guy at the piano starts playing and everyone turns toward the music.
Except me. Except Shane.
The first few lines of waking up and applying makeup are sung and I’m lost in them, in this moment.
The club bursts into a sing-shout, “I say a little prayer for you!”
I jump, startled, and laugh. This is awesome.
Another verse followed by the music kicks up! The entire restaurant is singing the chorus. “Forever and ever, you stay in my heart . . .”
Bradley looks completely lost. Shane is beaming. I’m flabbergasted. Everyone is in on it. Everyone.
“This is on the list!” I yell out over the chorus to Shane, forgetting myself. This is why he and Rand stuck around. It was planned. Clive knew, everyone knew! My heart is swollen with sentiment. This one isn’t just about rediscovering a feeling so it transfers through my art to Shane’s concept. This one’s for me. He did this one for me, and it’s the coolest thing ever.
“Forever and ever, you’ll stay in my heart—”
“What the hell is going on?” Bradley shouts out with a laugh, which sends everyone into hysterics.
“What? No! No,” I say, as the waitress grabs my hand. She’s pulling me toward the piano. Maggie and Ellie are pointing and singing. The chorus is in full swing, and when I look back to my table, I throw my head back with a burst of laughter. Tears actually roll from my eyes. This is too much!
My entire work party, except for Bradley, is waving huge lobster-claw oven mitts over their heads and singing, “Forever and ever, you stay in my heart . . .”
Oh my gosh, how . . . I love this.
“GUESS I NEED TO SEE the movie again,” Bradley’s saying for what seems the hundredth time. It’s late, and he’s leaving for Lansing, so he’s making his way around the table, thanking everyone for coming and shaking hands.
Maggie and Clive have their coats and Clive is settling the bill.
“I’ll be back,” I say to Ellie. “I’m gonna walk Bradley out.” Grabbing his hand, I walk with him to the front lobby. Well, skip-walk. I’m still elated.
“Did you have fun?” He stops at the door and grasps my other hand.
“Yeah, of course!” It was a really good moment.
“I don’t know what the hell this was tonight. The whole singing lobster thing,” he says with a laugh. “I know you’ve made me watch that movie, but . . .”
“I really liked it. In fact, I adored it.” I full-on grin, meaning every word.
“Well, I’m sure your family’s planning a nice engagement dinner for us.” He lets go of my hand and strokes my cheek.
“My family’s plan is to mix it with a mini-shower for Ren. Which I don’t think is necessary.” I shake my head. “And there’s no way it’ll be as cool as this.”
His head tips back. “I didn’t realize you liked oven mitts and—”
“Oh, I do.”
He laughs and pulls me closer. “Okay, then. I’ll remember that for anniversary gifts, Christmas. You’re completely covered.” He leans in and kisses my nose. “Wish I didn’t have to go. You’re not staying, right?”
“Nope. Not long, anyway. Besides, I’m with Ellie.”
He looks past me back to the table and before I know it his lips are pressed on mine. When he pulls back, he grins mischievously then pats my bottom. “I’ll call ya when I get there.”
Without turning, I can feel Shane’s eyes on me. I know he’s watching. And I know Bradley’s display is for his benefit. But that’s all I know. Tonight, I’m in a tug-of-war between broken logic and raw emotion.
Bradley turns and leaves. That’s it. No sentimental gush of how much he loves me or what a special night this was. Nope, just a call ya when I get there and a pat on my backside. Well, he did say he wished he didn’t have to go.
I turn and return to the table as a few others are saying their goodbyes. Most of our party has trickled out. Tonya’s putting on her coat. Wait, Tonya’s leaving? I do a mental tally of who just left. I know her game. Terry from Sales, he’s married, and not her type. Rod and Patrick from Programming left a little while ago. I think they’re actually a couple, so she’s not their type.
“New guy?” I ask hopefully.
“Just tired.” She zips her jacket and pulls her hair out from under the collar.
“Yeah right, don’t think I haven’t noticed all the new clothes.”
She adjusts her purse’s strap on her shoulder, looks past me, and lifts her chin. “You gonna tell me what’s really up with bachelor number two over there?”
My stomach drops.
“Exactly,” Tonya says before I can answer. “Have a good niiight,” she sing-songs and heads for the door. “I’ll call ya tomorrow,” she yells out over her shoulder.
Whatever. I spin around and scan the room. Ellie’s talking with Rand Peterson at the bar and everyone else has gone.
Except Shane.
He’s walking toward me. I steady my nerves and start in his direction. I’m beyond confused. Logically, I know he hasn’t said one thing to make me think he wants more, but his actions, doing all of this . . .
Shane holds up a one-minute finger and turns on his heel toward the piano. Something’s said, a flash of green is exchanged between their hands, and then the pianist starts to play the familiar intro of “As Time Goes By.”
Really? I laugh. It’s Casablanca. Okay, so he’s still in major movie mode. He’s being funny. Wasn’t she married to someone else and this was their song? People begin moving onto the floor to dance. Shane steps around them on his way over.
My nose wrinkles with a smirk. “He doesn’t get the girl, ya know.”
“No. He doesn’t.”
My heart jumps. “What are you doing?” I ask, almost in a whisper.
He grabs my hand and wraps his other around my lower back, pulling me in close. “Dancing.” Leaning near my ear, he whispers, “We’re dancing.”
I push away so I can see his face. “I only came over to say thank you for tonight and . . . and I’m engaged. And if I’m being honest . . .” My eyebrows are knitted, my voice is shaky. “You’re making things complicated.” There, I said it.
An impish grin plays across his lips. His eyes scan the length of my body and find their way to mine again. “Then you should have worn a different dress.”
Wow. The smile can’t be helped. “Maid in Manhattan? Really?”
Shane pulls me in close. “Kensington, it’s not complicated. It’s just a dance.”
It feels complicated. That’s a movie, too. Meryl Streep starts a secret affair with her ex.
His hand feels warm in mine. He’s holding me so close I can feel the heat of his body, his breath near my ear. I squeeze my eyes shut to force out the guilt. Yeah, it’s so complicated.
I feel myself lean in. I think I’ve had one drink too many. The scent of musk and sandalwood fills my nose as we move. It’s familiar, comforting, but in no way safe.
“Did you like the movie scene?” He folds my arm into his, tight against his chest. I’m now completely enveloped, tucked in close, wrapped up in Shane. Surrounded by temptation.
“Mmm-hmm, so much,” I mumble, still dancing. Still lost.
A soft chuckle near my ear. “I don’t think Bradley did.”
Still damned. “Yeah, he didn’t get it, is all.”
“Does
he get you?”
My breath catches in my throat. My expression falls.
“Because I don’t think he does. I don’t think he gets you at all, Kensington.”
I step back, breaking stride with the music, which now seems too loud. Shane still has my hand, his arm still has a hold around my waist, but there’s now a space between us, a sudden distance of old hurts and new questions. Like is this about the concept or me?
Shane leans forward with a determined look on his face. “You’re with Bradley because it looks good on paper. He’s got the approval of your friends and your almighty family.”
I pull my hand away. “You don’t know—”
“I do. You have this idea of what you want and he fits the bill, right? I was in this same place. Almost married.”
My chin lowers. Almost married?
“But, when I stepped back, I realized it wasn’t really the life I intended for myself. She didn’t fit. And Bradley doesn’t fit you. I think you know that. You’re just too scared to disappoint them or risk doing anything about it.”
“Shouldn’t I be scared? Wasn’t I the one disappointed?” I can’t believe I just said that. I step back, warnings going off in my head, my heart. Big ideals and no follow-through. He left me, too. Maybe for the same reason? What am I doing?
His face is doing that searching-for-the-right-words thing.
I don’t wait for him to find them. My feet are already in motion. This isn’t at all how I thought things would go. I don’t know what I thought, or think, or anything.
I choke back frustrated tears and make my way through the crowd toward Ellie and Rand. Ellie’s finishing another drink. She’s no better to drive than I am. Shit.
“Rand, would you mind dropping Ellie and me off? Like, right now, please? I’m really sorry. I, um, just need to go.” I pull my lips in and bite. That’s all I’m saying.
Rand looks past me, I assume to Shane. His eyes dart back as he stands. “Yeah, of course. Sure.”
I grab my bag and head for the door, not waiting for anyone, not looking back. I know Shane’s not following me. The scene from My Best Friend’s Wedding pops into my head. When Julianne’s chasing Michael, and George asks over the phone, “Who’s chasing you? Nobody, get it? There’s your answer.”
The problem is I haven’t asked the question.
I’m not sure I want to.
“THANKS FOR STAYING,” I SAY to Ellie, rolling over under my comforter to face her. I couldn’t bear to be alone tonight. I gave her a T-shirt and some sweats to sleep in, but I barely managed to change. I didn’t even wash off my makeup. I’m still a bit tipsy.
“No prob. You saved me from sleeping with Rand,” she says and tugs the blanket back on her. “Sleeping with you is so much better.”
I laugh softly. “You like him, though, right?”
“Yeah, he’s funny. Makes me laugh. He’s like a giant, though. What do you think that means as far as—”
“How big are his feet?” I snort a laugh.
“Holy shit! I should be really concerned, then.” Ellie giggles and props herself on an elbow. “So, you going to tell me what happened?”
“You like Bradley, right?” I don’t even know where I’m going with this.
“Um, yeah. Everyone likes him. He’s great, why?”
“Shane doesn’t. He said Bradley doesn’t get me, that he fits the bill on paper, with my family . . .” I don’t finish, because a tightening has seized my chest. The back of my throat hurts from keeping it in.
Ellie sits up and places her pillow across her lap. “Your family makes you nuts. Everyone knows that.”
I sit, too, and scootch myself back against the headboard, pulling my knees up tight.
“Kenz, can I say something without you throwing me out of your bed?”
I squeeze my arms tighter around my knees. “As long as it’s how delightful and talented I am.”
“Well, there’s that.” She nudges me and smiles. “Look, Bradley’s great. I like him, I do. But when you and Shane are together, you’re different. There’s something between you guys. I haven’t been around the two of you much, but even I can see it.”
“But that’s just it. He hasn’t said he wants anything more, he’s just said Bradley’s not right for me. And he wants me to remember the girl I was in order to pull off his concept.”
I take a deep, deep breath and look at the ceiling. “And then we’re dancing and it’s wonderful and terrible and I could die because it reminds me of what we had. Maybe what I still want.” Turning, I look at Ellie. “Even his reasons for messing things up in college make sense. But he said he was almost married, so what, he still can’t commit to anything or anyone. I don’t know, it’s just . . .”
Ellie pushes her hair from her face and leans into the pillow across her lap. “What?”
“It just felt like tonight was really for me, ya know?” I blow out a breath and shake my head. “I’m sure I’m just being stupid and confusing everything.”
“You know Shane planned the whole restaurant song-thing.” She smiles. “Yeah, he did. He had me go and find the oven mitts and e-mail everyone so it looked like I planned it. But he did it. He even called ahead to Ditty’s to make sure they’d play along.”
Ellie’s watching me, but I don’t say anything. I’m processing. He really did do this all for me.
“Okay, how about this: Tell me what you used to like about Shane when you guys were together.”
“Why?”
“Just humor me.”
“I don’t know.” I push out a breath. “He was my best friend. He loved my art, and I mean genuinely loved it.” I straighten and wrap my arms around my knees again. “I always felt special when I was with him. He would hold my hand even if other guys were around. Of course, if anyone said anything he’d kick the shit out of them.” I laugh. “I loved to watch him box. He was all attitude and adrenaline. His hair would curl even more from the sweat. And his voice, the way he says my name, and really listens to me.”
“You mean, listened, the way he listened to you.” Her lips turn up slightly. “You said ‘listens.’”
I sink down on my back, pulling the comforter over me.
Ellie pulls it back, so my face is exposed. “Tell me about Bradley.”
“He’s Bradley. He’s considerate and he thinks about practical, responsible things. God knows I’m not always practical.” I pull my arms out from the comforter and chop them along my sides, tucking myself in. “And yes, my family loves him. So what? They’re supposed to love him. Why wouldn’t they? He talks politics and health care with my dad and Grayson. Mom and Ren swoon anytime he flashes his Ken smile at them. It’s kind of funny.”
“That’s what your family likes, Kenz.”
“I like those things,” I say defensively.
Ellie wrinkles her nose, then slides down on her side facing me. “No, you like that your family likes them.”
“What the hell are you saying, Ellie?”
“I’m just saying, that when it comes to your family, Bradley fits.”
“And?” I turn, my eyebrows high.
“But you don’t.”
Screeching silence.
I’m not sure where I fit. It’s amazing the clarity that comes from psychotic jealousy. I laugh to myself. That’s the movie line, but I’m not jealous. I’m . . . still fungus.
Ellie scootches lower under the blankets and hugs a pillow to her side. “Hey, don’t stress about it, okay? You’ll figure this out.” She sounds sleepy. “And tomorrow we have the symphony. I promise you’ll have fun,” she says through a slow yawn. “And think how gorgeous you’ll look in that yellow dress.”
The dress Shane bought me.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Pretty Great
I HAVE MY STUFF OUT and have just finished straightening my hair. All I have to do is step into my dress and shoes, and I’m ready for the symphony with Ellie. She should be here in less than an hour to pick me up. Tickets.
I grab them off the kitchen corkboard and tuck them into my bag.
Ellie skipped out early for a yoga class and left me alone with my thoughts for the day. Not entirely a good combination. Tonya never called. Figures. I’ve left two messages.
Bradley’s phone keeps going to voice mail. If he’s at the game, he probably can’t hear it. I’m not sure what I want to say anyway. And since he’s there with clients it’s not like we’re going to get into some big life-changing discussion. Was it going to be a life-changing conversation? I don’t know. Maybe.
I keep thinking about last night. How Shane got everyone to read the lines from My Best Friend’s Wedding and act them out. I’ve been replaying it over and over in my head like a selection from a DVD menu. It was the perfect moment, just like the movie, only I was the star.
Shane planned the whole thing for me. Bradley’s only excited about what my family has planned. A split day with Ren. It’s a little disconcerting. I mean, what about what I like?
And then there was that dance.
One dance. Extremely close. Breathtakingly slow.
Bradley didn’t ask me to dance. It was our engagement party and he never asked. It’s not his fault, he doesn’t like dancing, but still. Shane’s words keep circling around in my head like a shark.
He fits the bill, he doesn’t fit you.
Has the approval of my almighty family.
I’m too scared to disappoint them.
Closing my eyes, I try to quiet my mind. The truth is, Shane’s right, at least about one thing. I am scared.
Of making the wrong decision. Of regret. Of him.
At my computer, I jump on Facebook to zone out.
New status: Some people require subtitles.
Sighing, I focus on my news feed. It’s congested by photos of Tina’s new puppy. Yup, cute from every angle. And Shannon from high school has added yet another cat photo. This one’s in the arms of a shirtless fireman. I click LIKE.
Surprisingly, I don’t see any new updates from Ren or my mom. No links posted of cute baby stuff, or photos of the nursery’s progress. Last blitz, they were considering a vintage Noah’s Ark theme. Now there’s nothing. The automatic baby-bot seems to have stalled.