“Eli,” I reached out to him.
“Don’t,” he said, seething as he stared down at the floor. “Just don’t.”
The room was completely silent as Eli slowly strode over to the tray of instruments on the ground and started cleaning up his own mess. With his back to the room, he continued.
“Her death was officially ruled an accident—too many sleeping pills, they said.” He shook his head, and his voice dripped with spite. “It wasn’t until much later that I found out the truth. Gunther told me everything— about the buy-outs, about Harley and his team, everything. The two of us grabbed whatever samples we could and got the hell out of there. Harley used his connections to stage my disappearance, and we set up our own lab in some Podunk town on the other side of the river. We went somewhere no one in their right mind would think to look for us—or so we thought.”
“That day, on the road,” I said. “They found you, didn’t they?”
“I thought you looked familiar,” Eli said, narrowing his eyes at me with a smirk. “Yes, though, how they found me is an absolute mystery. We were careful, had to be. No one, save for Gunther, Bella, and myself was ever made aware of our location. All communication was done in code. Only a ghost from the inner circle would be able to cypher those messages, and yet?”
“Someone must have talked,” Zander said. “Gunther, maybe?”
“Perhaps, though I can’t imagine why. At any rate, there they were, busting down my door, guns ablaze. I thought, for sure, they were going to kill me, but—,” he picked his stool up from the floor, and lowered himself onto it with a grunt.
“But what,” I waved him on.
“Well, it seems I had something they wanted,” Eli said, scooping up his backpack from the floor and setting it gingerly in his lap. “One of the more recent samples I had managed to abscond with, was of particular interest to them; a very rare, very pure, primordial version of what I called Gnathobdela Retroviridae Symbiosicis. It means—well, put simply it leech parasite virus.”
“I don’t—.” I narrowed my eyes in confusion.
“He’s saying he discovered the virus, Liv,” Jake said.
“As in this virus?” Zander held up his blackened hand, and glared at Eli.
“You knew?” I said, shooting to my feet.
The sympathy I had been feeling for Eli just moments ago drained from my body. I shoved him violently to the floor and stood over him. Zander stood, but Ty was there in a flash, holding me back from doing much worse.
“It’s not that simple,” he said, grimacing up at me.
“You knew the virus existed,” I said, gritting my teeth furiously. “You knew all along, and you did nothing?”
“I couldn’t—you must understand,” Eli protested, his arm still protectively clutching his backpack. “In its original form, the GRS pathogen was moot; inactive. She was little more than a string of dormant DNA when I first documented it. Just a garbled up strand of proteins and enzymes that lacked the appropriate mechanisms to fulfill its potential. The virus was completely harmless, until—.”
“Until Icarus,” I said, suddenly feeling dizzy.
“Y-yes, exactly,” he stammered, scooting away from me across the floor. “When I was with project E99S, the geographic coding of the samples was above my clearance. I never knew where any of them originated, until much later.”
“And?” My rage was barely in check. If Ty hadn’t been holding me back, I am not sure what I would have done to him.
“GRS originated from a mass within the orbital debris field rotating above the northern hemisphere,” Eli said, climbing awkwardly to his feet. “This particular mass was devoid of the necessary attributes for the virus to thrive. It was buried deep in the clump and only passed over North America, for a very brief time, every twenty-seven days or so. Roughly seventeen minutes to be precise. The odds were astronomical.”
“You are telling me that a tiny solar flare that was never supposed to reach Earth, somehow ignited a full-on solar storm, the likes of which should not have been possible. And this impossible storm then passed through a tiny chunk of space garbage, at exactly the right moment to send it hurtling to Earth,” I said, my voice getting louder as I went. “And, this impossible solar event just so happened to create the perfect conditions to turn a harmless chunk of proteins and crap into a devastating space parasite that either takes over your body, turns you into a goddamn monster, or burns you to a crisp from the inside out.”
“Basically, yes,” Eli said.
“Well, shit!” I said, dropping back onto my stool.
Chapter 43
Maps and Missions
“Gent-ah-my-sin?” Ty said, holding up another bottle of pills.
“Yeah, sure kid. That will work,” Eli said, clearly annoyed. “Look, let’s make this simple, okay? Just grab anything ending in sin, clin, or cillin.”
“Gotcha,” Ty said, giving Eli a thumbs-up as he went back to work.
The silly gesture earned an adoring smile from Christa and an exaggerated eye roll from Jake as the two of them returned from carrying armloads of pilfered supplies out to the truck. Riley and Falisha stuck to their usual scavenger hunt tactics in search of food and had just popped in to deliver the spoils of war. After destroying yet another vending machine, they had taken to raiding desks and lockers for ancient snacks and non-perishables.
Bella lay on the floor at my feet, snoring contently, her belly full of that super-pricey dog food that people like me would never have been able to afford in the old world. Her front paw twitched, and she snorted through her cheeks. I hoped she was chasing a rabbit or something through a wide-open field. I couldn’t help but wonder if, in her dreams, Bella had all four legs.
“Hey, you,” Zander said, snapping me back to reality.
“Oh, hey,” I said, looking up at him. His eyes were still a bit glassy from the morphine, but he seemed to be doing okay. “How’s the shoulder?”
“It’s alright. Just a little sore, is all,” he said, rolling it gingerly, as his hand slid up to the bandage on my arm. “What about you? Looks like you took quite a beating, yourself.”
“Oh, that,” I said, shrugging his hand away. “I’m fine.”
“Right, of course,” Zander said, shaking his head. A hint of that crooked smile peeked through, as his hair fell into his face. He pushed the loose strands behind his ear and slid something heavy into my hand. “Anyway, it took us a while to find this old thing, but I thought maybe you could use this.”
“A phone book?” I looked down at the yellow pages in confusion.
“I took the liberty of marking the page for you,” he said and then he kissed my forehead and walked away.
The cover was worn and faded, with deep creases spidering out from a solid fold down the middle. Sauk Valley Area Directory, 2001-02, it read. I lay it carefully on a nearby table, and flipped it open. The pages were as thin as vellum, crackling and crinkling at the slightest touch. Some pages were earmarked; others were stained with coffee rings or scribbled in ink, each containing the names and addresses of people who may no longer exist.
I grabbed onto the scrap of paper that protruded from the center and slid my finger along the spine, opening the book to the page that Zander had marked for me. I ran down the listings until one jumped out at me; DHS Family Resource Center, 2605 Woodlawn Road, Sterling IL.
Tears filled my eyes. I closed the book and hugged it tightly against my chest.
“Ready?” Riley asked, scooping up the bag I had just filled with medical supplies.
“Very,” I said, hooking my arm through hers.
“Hey, Liv?” Riley held firm to my arm, stopping me in my tracks. Her big brown eyes bore a hole into mine. “You should cut him some slack, you know?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” I said.
“Look, I know Eli made some mistakes, but who among us hasn’t?” Her gaze was unrelenting. “Deep down, he really is a good person and in his own annoying way, I thin
k he really does want to help us.”
“Riley,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“Please, Liv, we need him. Eli is important, somehow. I can feel it,” her eyes got that far away look again, and her hand was pressed to her heart. “Will you at least try?”
“Fine,” I said though I wasn’t particularly happy about it.
“Awesome,” Riley said, that trademark smile returning as she pulled me toward the exit. “Let’s go!”
By the time we made it out to the parking lot, nearly everyone had climbed into the truck and found a seat. The cab was only large enough for four people, but the cargo area had more than enough room for the extra passengers and our limited supplies.
Zander had situated himself back in the driver’s seat (thank goodness), and left the front passenger seat open, presumably for me. Jake and Falisha had apparently called dibs on the back seat, leaving Christa, Ty, Riley, and Eli to pile into the cargo bay. Eli held his hand out, helping Riley climb up into the back of the truck, before grabbing onto the side rail to follow.
“Liv,” Riley poked her head out and nodded toward him, before disappearing back into the bed of the truck.
“Wait, Eli,” I said, scowling at myself as I grabbed his arm. “Hold up.”
“Seriously?” Eli’s closed his eyes, dropping his chin to his chest for a moment before he spoke again. “Look, I get that you are pissed, or whatever, and I am not saying that I blame you, but come on. I said I was sorry. I don’t know what more you want me to—”
“Jesus, would you just shut up for like five seconds,” I said, rolling my eyes as I reached into my backpack. “I was wondering if, maybe, you could take a look at something for me.”
“Oh,” Eli said, looking confused. “I mean, sure. What is it?”
“Gunther gave this to me,” I said, holding the Bible out to him. The map we had confiscated from Zander’s father folded neatly along with it. “I thought maybe you could make sense of it.”
“If anyone can, I suppose it would be me,” Eli said. He clutched the package to his chest and nodded swiftly, before climbing up into the back of the truck.
The energy in the cab was reserved and intent as we made our way down the abandoned highway towards Sterling. Falisha and Jake were uncharacteristically quiet, but they whispered back and forth from time to time as if to remind us they were there. We turned off Highway 30 and rolled onto Emerson, as Zander’s hand slid across the front seat.
“Breathe, Liv.” Zander gave my hand a reassuring squeeze before threading our fingers together. I squeezed back and scooted closer to his side, breathing him in.
For a moment, I forgot we were not alone; that we were driving a stolen military vehicle across the devastated wasteland that used to be our home. In that solitary beat of my heart, I closed my eyes and made it all go away— Micah and his mother, the woman and her dead child, the explosions. The unrelenting stench of smoke and death.
All of it melted away for a few precious seconds. Our hands fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. The engine downshifted, pulling me from my daze. My eyes opened slowly and the truck rolled to a complete stop a few feet from the front entrance of the DHS offices.
“We’re here,” Zander said softly.
“I think we should go stretch our legs,” Falisha said, dragging Jake from the truck by his arm and slammed the door closed behind her.
“You okay?” Zander asked. His thumb gently caressed my cheek.
“Zander, I—” I whispered, slowly shifting in my seat to face him.
“What’s wrong?” His eyes were alight with worry. “Liv, are you okay?”
“I’m fine, it’s just. I mean, you have been so—oh, to hell with it,” I said, throwing myself into his lap.
My arms instinctively wrapped themselves around Zander’s neck, one hand eagerly threading itself through his tangled hair. I pulled him closer still, inhaling his scent. My chest pressed tight against his as I slowly lowered myself onto his hips. The bottom of the steering wheel pressed uncomfortably into my butt, but I barely noticed. Every inch of my body tingled with electricity, my nerves crackling like a live wire as we pressed our bodies together. My mouth smashed hungrily against his, teasing and pulling at his soft lips, while my hands explored the firm muscles of his back and chest. I would probably never be able to express my gratitude to Zander in words, but I was determined to show him just how much he meant to me.
“Jesus, Liv,” Zander growled into my mouth. “You’re killing me, here.”
“Oh God,” I pulled back. “Your arm. Did I hurt you?”
“Not even a little bit,” he said, nipping at my bottom lip before swooping into my mouth with his tongue.
I grabbed his wrists and brought his hands around my body, urging him to hold me tighter. Eventually he relented and I melted into his arms, moaning softly against his skin as our bodies absorbed each other’s heat. We were lost in each other, and nothing else existed.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeep…B-beeep-beep— my elbow pressed into the horn, scaring the hell out of both of us and bringing us back to reality. We both froze. As soon as our eyes met, we burst out laughing, our foreheads pressed together as our bodies shook.
“Honk if you’re horny,” Jake shouted from somewhere outside the truck.
“Wooooo,” came a chorus of supporting catcalls and cheers, as our friends banged their fists on the door of the truck.
“Well, that was, umm,” I stammered, sliding down from Zander’s lap and back over to my own seat.
“Yeah,” Zander said, his cheeks turning red as he raked his hair out of his face. “It was.”
“Right, I suppose we should—,” I laughed nervously, pointing to my door.
“Yeah,” Zander said, taking a deep breath.
I swung my door open, hopped down and slammed it shut behind me. I leaned my back against the door, trying to gather myself before facing the rest of my friends.
“Okay,” I said, ignoring the smirks and knowing grins as I rounded the front of the truck. “This is just a quick stop, everyone, so don’t get too comfortable. As soon as we have the address, we are back on the road, got it?”
“You got it, boss-lady,” Ty said, playfully slinging Christa over his shoulder as he took off running.
She squealed with delight, shouting half-hearted threats about “getting him,” and “making him pay,” if he didn’t put her down. Falisha smiled at Ty’s antics, twirling her hair flirtatiously. Jake stewed nearby, throwing rocks at the side of the building and muttering under his breath. Bella wandered in an aimless circle, sniffing out a perimeter around the small parking lot.
Eli was seated on the ground, the map spread out before him and the Bible in his lap, forgoing the use of his tiny flashlight in favor of the truck’s massive LED headlights. He was lost in thought, twisting a pencil absently between his thumb and forefinger and barely seemed to notice as I walked past him, but smiled up at Jake when he slid in next to him.
“I’m coming with you,” Zander said, sliding his hand in mine as he caught up with me.
“Me too,” Riley said, her mouth set in a firm line.
Glass crackled beneath our feet, as we stepped through the open pane of the shattered glass doors. Colorful posters warning new moms of everything from SIDS to stranger-danger and fliers for various government assistance programs littered the floors of empty hallways. We shuffled past the waiting room, pushing aside the chairs that laid in a heap as we burst through the double doors to the hallway that housed the caseworker offices.
“This way,” I said, gesturing down the hallway to our right. “His office is down here.”
We passed a few unmarked doors, and a receptionist’s desk before we finally found Mr. Trundle’s office. It was exactly as I remembered it— wood paneling, rusty gray filing cabinets, boring motivational posters spanning the entire back wall, where a window should have been. The green tile floor that squeaked beneath your feet. The 70’s-style furnishings, complete with dark faux-woo
d trim and bright orange upholstery.
Most of all I remembered, as I sat there numbly listening to this man prattle on about funerals and foster care, how odd it seemed that a family caseworker had no pictures of his own family in his office.
I dashed over to the filing cabinets, anxious to spill their contents across the room in search of my brother’s file. The first set of drawers was labeled forms and fliers, so I passed it by. The second contained files A through I. I ripped open the third, and started digging through the files, tossing them aside…
“Jackson…Jerrodson,” I said, throwing the files over my shoulder.
“Want some help?” Riley offered, but she stayed back.
“Kessler comma Erin, Klimson comma Sasha…where is it? Kuebbel comma James, Lambrose comma Eddy…Larson comma Lucas! I found it, oh my God, here it is!” I said, frantically swiping my arm across the top of the desk to clear it of its contents.
I set the file down, and took a step back, suddenly afraid to see what was inside.
“Liv, what’s wrong?” Riley asked, stepping closer.
“I can’t,” I said, tears rolling down my cheeks. “All this time, it’s all I ever wanted. But, what if…what if he’s, I dunno.”
“It’s okay Liv,” Riley said, her hand resting gently on my shoulder as she slowly opened the file.
Stapled to the inside of the jacket was a wallet-sized picture of my little brother. I ripped it free and slid it into my back pocket as I slowly thumbed my way through the file’s contents. The Fosters had submitted pages and pages of reference letters; There were notes from family members, teachers, even their former foster children. Each of them spoke nothing but their praises for my brother’s new family and made it a little easier to breathe.
Next came a section entitled “notes.” I held the pages in my hands, biting my lip as I read through them.
According to his foster mother, Lucas continues to struggle to adjust to the loss of his parents…child suffers from frequent nightmares, body weight has decreased by four pounds…Lucas refused to go to school today, going so far as to induce an asthma attack to avoid attendance…
Killshot (Icarus Series Book 1) Page 44