She would have to face it, her inner voice noted. He was not asking for anything outrageous; in fact, he was probably doing the right thing in insisting she go to London. If Agatha and the rest of his aunts thought she should, then they were probably right. And she could never explain why she was so very reluctant to leave the secure peace of the Abbey—not to anyone.
Leading her from the library, Jason felt a perverse pleasure in dragging her from her books. Immediately he acknowledged the feeling, he was appalled. What was this fascination of his reducing him to?
As it transpired, having accepted the inevitable, Lenore had too much to do to brood on the fact. On her discovering that her husband intended to dally no longer than was necessary for her to get herself organised, her hours were filled with giving orders—for the household in her absence, to Trencher over which gowns she wanted packed. They departed after luncheon the next day.
* * *
AS THE CARRIAGE rattled over the cobbles, Lenore put her head back on the squabs and sent up an urgent prayer for deliverance. She could not endure much more swaying. She had never before been so afflicted and suspected the cause was not far to seek. This was what happened to women with child, or so she had read.
The long journey had been uneventful enough. The first stage to Salisbury had not been that long; she had coped quite well, the carriage rattling along at a good pace over the uncrowded roads. They had spent the night with Jason’s uncle, taking to the road after breakfast. Breakfast had been a mistake. Luckily, Jason had spent much of the day on horseback. He had decided to take his favourite hunter to town, presumably, Lenore supposed, so that in November he could travel on direct to his hunting box in Leicestershire while she returned to the Abbey. He had elected to ride, allowing Trencher to travel in the carriage with her, leaving space for the groom beside the coachman on the box. Trencher, she had discovered, was a fount of wisdom on childbearing.
“Three of m’sisters have had six of ’em, my lady. Don’t you fret. This’ll only last a little while. Best try to get your mind off your stomach—think of something nice.”
Lenore thought of Jason, and the hours they had shared in her bed at the Abbey. Which had led to her present predicament, which in turn led her thoughts back to the nausea that threatened to overwhelm her.
By the time Jason had displaced Trencher on the outskirts of the capital, she had felt a lot better. As her husband had been unfailingly kind in a highly distant fashion, Lenore was reluctant to attract his somewhat unnerving attention; she had said nothing of her indisposition.
But the slow, rocking progress through the crowded streets of the capital had sorely tried her fortitude.
“We’re here.” Beside her, Jason sat up. As the carriage rocked to a final halt, he reached for the door. Alighting, he turned to hand her down. Lenore quit the coach with alacrity. As she walked up the steps by her husband’s side, she heaved a sigh of relief to have her feet on solid ground.
Jason heard her sigh but interpreted it quite differently.
Lenore had visited Eversleigh House but briefly in the weeks before their marriage, her only concern then to determine if she wished any of the chambers other than her own to be redecorated. She hadn’t. The current vogue for white and gilt had never found favour with her; the solid polished oak with which Jason had filled his house, the deep greens and reds and blues of the upholstery, were much more to her taste. There had been nothing to change; Jason had claimed as his prerogative the redecoration of her rooms. It was, therefore, with a sense of expectation that she allowed him to lead her up the stairs at the conclusion of the traditional servants’ welcome in the hall.
“These are your rooms.” Jason set the door wide and stood back, his eyes going to her face, keen, despite the continuing hurt that ate at his confidence, to see if she liked what he had had done.
Slowly, Lenore entered, eyes drawn immediately to the bed. Of pale polished oak, it was wide but not overly high, the mattress sunk into the base. High above its centre, a gold ball hung, suspended from where she could not tell. From it depended a tent of green silk, pegged out to the four corners of the bed where four slim columns of turned wood ran upwards to support it. It was an elegant bed of unusual design, the floral carvings that marked the headboard repeated on the footboard. Silks and satins in a melding of pale greens covered the expanse. It looked remarkably comfortable.
Turning, Lenore saw that all the furniture—the large dressing-table, an escritoire, two cheval glasses and three huge wardrobes—as well as a selection of occasional tables, sidetables, chairs and stools scattered about the large room, were all in the same fine wood upholstered in greens and soft golds.
Letting out a long sigh of pure appreciation, Lenore glanced about, locating her husband by the dressing-table. Meeting his watchful gaze, she smiled, utterly unaffected, her mask put aside. “It’s absolutely lovely, my lord. Just what I would have wished for.”
Her words, she was pleased to note, brought a slight smile to her husband’s lips. He had, she had noticed, been rather sombre of late.
“I’d hoped for your approval. And I hope you approve of these, too.”
Drawing nearer, Lenore saw that his hand rested on a large, flattish velvet case.
“I had these made up for you,” Jason said, lifting the lid of the case. “Using some of the stones in the older pieces of the family collection. The diamonds are in the safe downstairs—I’ll show them to you later. But I thought these are probably more your style at present.”
Lenore did not answer. Eyes wide, she stared at the range of necklaces, earrings, pendants, rings and brooches revealed within the case. Winking in the last of the afternoon sunlight, emeralds and topazes, pearls and peridots glimmered and shone against the black satin lining. Slowly, Lenore sank on to the stool before the dressing-table, her fingers stealing to the jewels. Her jewels. She had never had much in the way of jewellery—her mother’s pearls had come to her, but the rest of the family collection was in keeping for Jack’s wife.
As her fingers caressed a delicate peridot and pearl necklace, she glanced up, blinking rapidly, at her husband. She wanted to thank him, but “Oh, Jason,” was all she could say, and even then her voice quavered.
Luckily, he seemed to understand, for he smiled, much more his old teasing self, and reached for the necklace.
“Here, try it on.”
He fastened the catch at the nape of her neck. Lenore stood and stepped away from the table, the better to view her reflection in the mirror above it. Jason stepped back but remained behind her, watching over her shoulder as she fingered the delicate pearl drops.
Finally, drawing in a shattered breath, Lenore smiled mistily at him in the mirror. “These are truly exquisite, my lord. I don’t know how to thank you.”
His eyes dropped to her throat, as if studying the necklace. From behind, his fingers came, first to trace the strand as it encircled her neck, then to caress her sensitive nape. “No thanks are required, my dear. You’re my wife, after all.”
His words were light; not so the expression in his eyes. As his head lowered, his object clearly to place a kiss on her throat, Lenore panicked.
Turning, she blurted out the first thing that came into her head. “Regardless of that fact, my lord, these are the most wonderful gifts I’ve ever been given. I do thank you, most sincerely.”
She could not bear to look into his eyes. The silence stretched, then was broken when he said, “I’m overjoyed that they meet with your approval, my dear.”
His tone was distant again, miles away.
“I’ll leave you now. No doubt you’d like to rest.” Feeling as if someone had landed a direct hit to his stomach, Jason forced himself to stroll to the door. His hand on the knob, he paused. “My aunt Eckington is giving a ball tonight. If you’re not too tired, I suspect it wo
uld be wise for us to attend.”
“Yes, of course,” Lenore agreed, desperate to make amends for her rebuff. “I’m sure I’ll be perfectly recovered by then.” Shyly, trying to read his expression across the slowly darkening room, she added, “I’ll take great delight in wearing some of your gifts tonight, Jason.”
“I’ll look forward to seeing them on you,” he replied, coldly formal. With a polite nod, he left the room.
Appalled, Lenore sank on to the stool before her dressing-table, one hand pressed to her lips. She knew perfectly well why she had shied away from that kiss—one kiss was all it would take for him to have her in his arms—and, once that happened, there would be only one end to their embrace. Not that she feared the outcome—oh, no. That, she longed for with all her being. But his leaving her at the Abbey had forced her to acknowledge the depth of her feelings, the totally consuming, all-encompassing love she felt for him.
And she was no longer sure she could keep it secret, certainly not if he surprised her as he had just then. She had no desire to forbid him her bed; she had thought he would come to her at night, when she could keep up her guard, endure her love in silence, protected from his too-perceptive gaze by the dark.
For it would never do to let him know she loved him—not as she did. It would embarrass her and probably him, too, although he would never let her see it. He would be kind and gentle and as caring as could be, but he would not love her.
That had never been one of his reasons for marriage.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
LATER THAT EVENING, Jason, his emotions under the severest control, propped the wall of his aunt’s ballroom and watched as his duchess made her bow to polite society. His aunt Eckington’s ball was the perfect venue; his senior paternal aunt commanded an awesome position in the ton. With Lady Eckington and her sister’s support, Lenore’s success was assured.
Not that his wife needed any help. She looked superb, all traces of tiredness vanished, her gleaming hair coiled about her head, her ivory shoulders bare. She had worn a pearl and emerald necklace, one he had given her, with her stunning deep green gown. The matching bracelets, worn high on her forearms, caught and diffracted the light. She looked gorgeous; he could not tear his eyes from her.
At the very hub of all attention, Lenore suffered an interminable round of introductions conducted by her hostess, ably seconded by Agatha. They ensured she met all the senior hostesses—to her considerable surprise, all these august matrons seemed only too pleased to exchange words and invitations with her. Then she realised that, as the Duchess of Eversleigh, she herself was now of their group; they were only seeking to establish social connection with the latest member of the highest echelon in the ton.
The realisation gave her courage to endure the smiles and nods and arch questions. The danger in admitting to her condition was obvious. Once Jason’s aunts learned she was carrying the heir, for so they would see it, they would hem her about, fuss and fume over her—they would drive her mad. So she blithely turned aside all their delicately probing questions. Her years of experience stood her in good stead; her new awareness of her station allowed her the liberty of distance, if she chose to assume it. Two hours of intense activity saw her feet firmly on the road to social success.
“Phew!” Agatha threw her a heartening glance. “You’ve done well, my dear. I know it’s all a bit trying, especially as you don’t look to be in town much. But having the position counts, when all’s said and done. It would do you no good to ignore it.”
Lenore acknowledged her mentor’s words with a smile, inwardly wondering where Jason was. She still felt horrendously guilty over her afternoon’s gaucherie. Try as she might, she had not been able to mend her fences, for he had given her no opportunity to do so. In fact, he had been so distant, she had barely found a chance to smile at him, let alone thank him as she ought for his thoughtful gifts. And if he continued as he was, she doubted she would get a chance.
Perhaps that was as well. When he came to her tonight, she would apologise and make him laugh, then thank him as he had wished her to do this afternoon.
“Lady Eversleigh, my dear. A pleasure to see you in town.”
Lenore turned to find Lord Selkirk, a friend of Harry’s, by her side. She held out her hand. “Good evening, my lord. Are you here for the duration or merely until the next meeting at Newmarket?”
“Dash it, m’dear. I’m not such a tipster as all that.”
“Lenore, dear. How’s life with His Grace of Eversleigh?”
Absorbed with turning aside such jocular queries, before she knew it Lenore was surrounded by a small court of acquaintances, friends of her brothers and some of the young ladies she had met in the weeks before her wedding. There was no escape from their chatter. Lenore smiled serenely and bore up under the strain, determined none would be able to say that the Duchess of Eversleigh was not up to snuff.
But she was wilting. In the heat of the ballroom, with the press of bodies all about her, the air close and increasingly stale, she started to feel her senses slide and wondered, in desperation, if she could break free. The conversation about her became a droning buzz in her ears.
“There you are, my dear.”
Jason’s strong voice hauled her back to reality an instant before faintness took hold. Lenore looked up at him with relief in her wide eyes and a small, tight smile on her lips.
Jason understood. He had crossed the room as soon as he had realised how long she had been standing at the centre of her circle. While no gathering, no matter how large, held the slightest power to overwhelm him, he knew she felt differently. He took her hand in a comforting clasp and, with the briefest of nods to her court, led her to the dance-floor.
Lenore came back to life to find herself held in her husband’s arms, slowly circling the room in a waltz. She blinked rapidly. “Th-thank you, my lord. I…didn’t feel at all the thing, just then. The lack of air, I expect.”
“No doubt.” Jason glanced down at her. “We’ll leave after this dance.”
Lenore was too grateful to take umbrage at his edict.
When she found herself seated beside him in the carriage, she wondered whether now would be a propitious time to thank him for her jewels. She tried to discover some way of introducing the topic, racking her tired brain to yield some innocuous phrase. Unconsciously, she leaned her head against his shoulder. Two minutes later, she was sound asleep.
Realising as much, Jason kept silent. Deep in consideration of his latest discovery on the fascinating topic of his wife, he was thankful she was not awake to further confound him. He had quite enough to deal with with this latest revelation. Standing in his aunt’s ballroom, watching his wife smile and laugh at other men’s sallies, seeing her attention focused on them, however innocently, he had been racked by a powerful emotion he could only describe as jealousy. He was jealous—of the entire ton, for the women who claimed her friendship were also included in his sights.
Relaxing back against the leather, he drew a deep breath. After a moment’s hesitation he stretched a protective arm about his sleeping wife, settling her safe against his side. A strong surge of emotion rocked him, but he was getting used to the effect she had on his system and no longer felt surprise at such happenings. This, he knew, was how he wanted things between them, her alone with him, comfortable and secure.
Which was why he had no intention of boasting of her condition. A word to his aunt Eckington as they were leaving had reassured him Lenore had not mentioned the fact. That did not surprise him; his wife was intelligent enough to guess how his aunts would behave once the news was out. His reasons for keeping mum were rather more serious. From his vantage point by the wall, he had seen a number of gentlemen eye his wife speculatively. None had dared approach her; the wolves of the ton had a tried and true approach to succulent young matrons who appeared wit
hin their orbit—he should know; he had perfected the art. They would not approach a young wife until she was known to be bearing her husband’s child. With this point established, most husbands could be relied on to become complacent, keeping to their clubs, leaving their front door unattended. Once it became known Lenore was pregnant, she would become fair game—most tempting game, if he had read the looks on his peers’ faces aright. Although he had no intention of ever becoming a complacent husband, he would much rather his wife was not exposed to the lures of the ton’s greatest lovers.
He glanced down at her face, what he could see of it, and felt his features relax. She had done well, his duchess. She had appeared exactly as he would have wished, gracious, with just a touch of hauteur in her manner to keep the unintroduced at bay. She would do well in the ton—she would succeed there as she had in all the other endeavours she had taken on in marrying him.
When the carriage stopped outside their door, and she did not wake, he carried her inside, soothing her confused murmur when she woke in the light of the hall. To his surprise, she blinked up at him, then smiled and, clasping her arms more tightly about his neck, placed her cheek on his shoulder and allowed him to carry her upstairs.
As he did so, he noted that she did not feel any heavier. It seemed strange that she was carrying his child, that it was growing apace within her, yet there was nothing in her slender figure to attest to the fact. Just as well. With any luck, the Little Season would be over before their news became too obvious to hide.
She was asleep again by the time he reached her room. Trencher, hurrying along the corridor, was taken aback to find her in his arms. At his nod, she opened Lenore’s bedchamber door, hanging back as he strode to the bed and gently laid his wife down.
Rules of Engagement: The Reasons for MarriageThe Wedding PartyUnlaced (Lester Family) Page 22