She wished she could cry. She would have liked to shed a few tears for the mother and the grandfather she missed so much, and for the death of a father who couldn’t love her. But especially for a man who wouldn’t let himself love her.
Would she ever be able to push past the barrier that death had erected? Bram loved her. She knew he did. They were meant to be together. She couldn’t imagine a life without Bram. But how could she make him see that?
The bedroom door opened quietly at her back. She’d been half expecting her sister, so she turned around. But it was Bram who stood silhouetted in the open doorway.
“I do love you, you know.”
His hoarse, raw words left her shaken.
“You’d be better off with Jacob,” he continued as he stepped inside and closed the door firmly. “Or anyone else who doesn’t come with a lot of baggage.”
She lifted her chin while her heart soared. “I don’t want anyone else.”
He crossed the room silently, a looming shape in the darkness.
“You’ll change your mind, Hayley. I carry more baggage than you know. I’m dead broke, my father is dying of cancer and I’ve got a mound of debts to pay off.”
“I have plenty of money. I could help.”
He stroked the side of her face. Moonlight etched the planes of his features.
“I won’t take a dime from you. I’m only telling you this to show you why there can’t be an ‘us.’ I’m trying to help one brother get through school, another one get through a messy divorce, and—”
“Wouldn’t these things be easier if you let someone share the burden?”
“Not when that someone is an heiress. I’ve been down that road before.”
“Don’t you dare start making comparisons! I’m not Helen.”
“No, you’re nothing like Helen.”
“Then stop thinking with your pride, Bram. Start thinking with your heart.”
His hands reached for her, his fingers tangling in her hair. She turned to kiss his palm and got his wrist instead.
“What am I going to do with you?”
“I have a couple of suggestions,” she said, breathless with new hope.
He made a soft sound of amusement in the back of his throat. “I know all about the sort of suggestions you tend to make.”
“Good.”
“Hayley, I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Then don’t. Life doesn’t come with guarantees. It comes with chances and opportunities. All we can ever do is make the best of what we have.”
His eyes were dark pools.
“I love you, Bram. I’ll love you even if you walk out on me. But if you do, I’m giving you fair warning that I’ll hunt you down.”
“You’d do it, too.”
“Bet on it. I think what we have is worth at least a try, don’t you?”
He drew her into his arms. She listened to the sound of his heart beating with hers. Bram was a proud man. Her man.
When he bent his head, she raised her face. The kiss was pure magic and she sighed in satisfaction.
“Want to see what I have on under this gown?” she whispered.
His fingers found her breast. “Feels like nothing.”
“Exactly.”
The kiss deepened with an edge of urgency. Bram backed her against the bed and stopped.
“We shouldn’t do this here.”
“Okay. My car’s out front.”
He choked on a low chuckle. “I love you, Hayley.”
Her heart sang with joy. “I know.”
“I should walk out that door and keep going.”
“But you won’t.”
Getting past his pride and the memories that haunted him wouldn’t be easy, but they’d make it work, somehow.
Bram searched her gaze for an endless second. The smile started in his eyes, crinkling the corners, then curved his lips with wry humor.
“No,” he promised, “I won’t. I guess someone has to keep you out of trouble. But the tights and the cape are officially retired, got it?”
Laughter bubbled in her throat. She threw her arms around his neck. “They weren’t really your best color, anyhow,” she whispered against his mouth.
Laughing out loud, he followed her down on the bed.
ISBN 978-1-4592-4095-7
THE FIRSTBORN
Copyright © 2003 by Patricia A. Gagne
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* Fools Point/Mystery Junction
† Heartskeep
The Firstborn Page 23