by Jo Ann Brown
After pulling his buggy to the side of the road, taking care not to steer into the ditch, he jumped out.
“Stay here, Jacob.”
“The horse—”
“No, stay here. There’s nothing you can do for the horse now.”
The boy nodded, and Nathaniel ran to the broken buggy. He had to leap over a wheel that had fallen off. Pulling some of the lights forward, he aimed them within the vehicle. One look was enough to show him the two passengers inside were unconscious. Where were the others?
Running to his own buggy, he pulled out a flashlight. He sprayed its light across the ground and saw one crumpled form, then another. He took a step toward them, then paused at the sound of metal wheels in the distance.
Nathaniel looked past the covered bridge on a road intersecting this one. He saw another buggy rushing away into the night. Had it been racing this one? How could the other buggy flee when these people were hurt?
No time for answers now. He scanned the area and breathed a prayer of gratitude when he saw lights from an Englisch home less than a quarter mile up the road. He’d send Jacob to have the Englischers call 911.
He halted in midstep. He couldn’t do that. The boy had seen his parents killed along a country road like this one.
Knowing his rudimentary first aid skills might not be enough to help now, he moved his own buggy far off the road. He told Jacob to remain where he was. Sure the frightened boy would obey, he ran toward the house. He hoped help wouldn’t come too late.
Chapter Thirteen
Esther was on time for school the next morning, but several of her scholars were late. She guessed they’d stayed in bed later, as she’d longed to do. It hadn’t been easy to face the day...and the fact Nathaniel had left with Celeste from the wedding. He seemed to be doing as he’d discussed with her brothers: playing the field.
She should be pleased he didn’t include her in his fun and adventures, but it hurt. A lot. Alvin Lee had dumped her without a backward glance when she urged him to stop his racing. He’d called her a stick-in-the-mud, though he’d tried to convince her to join him again.
Telling herself to concentrate on her job, she looked around her classroom. Jacob wasn’t at his desk. She wondered why he hadn’t come to school. The other scholars were toiling on worksheets, and the schoolroom was unusually quiet.
Maybe that was why she heard the clatter of buggy wheels in the school’s driveway. So did the scholars, because their heads popped up like rows of woodchucks in a field.
She rose and was about to urge the kinder to finish their work when the door opened. In astonishment, she met her brother Joshua’s brown eyes. Whatever had brought him to the schoolhouse must be very important because he hadn’t taken time to change the greasy shirt and trousers he wore at his buggy shop.
Her niece and nephew jumped to their feet and cried as one, “Daed!”
He gave them a quick smile and said, “Everything is fine at home and at the shop. I need to speak to Esther for a moment.”
“Once you’re done with your numbers,” Esther said to the scholars, pleased her voice sounded calm, “start reading the next chapter in your textbooks. Neva and I’ll have questions for you on those chapters later.” She gave her assistant teacher a tight smile as a couple of the boys groaned.
Neva nodded, and Esther was relieved she could leave the kinder with her. Next year she wouldn’t have that luxury, because Neva would have a school of her own.
As she walked to the door, Esther saw the scholars exchange worried glances. Apparently neither she nor Joshua had concealed their uneasiness as well as she’d hoped.
Her brother waited until she stepped out of the schoolroom and closed the door. She motioned for him to remain silent as she led him down the steps. He followed her to the swing set.
“Was iss letz, Joshua?” She could imagine too many answers, but pushed those thoughts aside.
“Alvin Lee is in the hospital.”
She sank to one of the swings because her knees were about to buckle. Holding it steady, she whispered, “The hospital?”
“Ja. I thought you’d want to know.” Joshua didn’t meet her eyes, and she wondered how much about Alvin Lee courting her the family had guessed.
“What happened?” she asked, though her twisting gut already warned her the answer would be bad.
“He crashed his buggy last night while racing.”
“How is he?” A stupid question. Alvin Lee would only be in the hospital if he was badly hurt. Otherwise, he’d be recovering at home.
“It’s not gut, Esther. I don’t know the details.”
“What do you know? Was he alone?” The questions were coming from her automatically, because every sense she had was numb. Alvin Lee had wounded her deeply, but she’d believed she loved him.
“I know Alvin Lee is in the hospital because Isaiah was alerted and came to tell me before he left for the hospital. Luella Hartz was one of the passengers with Alvin Lee. She was treated in the emergency room and released to her parents. From what Isaiah heard, she’s pretty badly scraped, and she has a broken leg and some cracked ribs. Two Englisch men were in the buggy, too, and they were banged up but nothing is broken.” His mouth drew into a straight line. “The buggy was too small for four adults. No wonder it rolled when Alvin Lee couldn’t make the corner. If a car had come along...” He shook his head.
Sickness ate through her. Alvin Lee had asked her to ride with him last night. If she had, she’d be the one with broken bones and humiliation. Or it could have been worse. She might be in the hospital, as Alvin Lee was.
God, danki for putting enough sense in my head to save me from my own foolishness. She added a prayer that all involved would recover as swiftly as possible.
“I hate to think of what might have happened if help hadn’t arrived quickly,” Joshua continued when she didn’t reply. “They should be grateful Nathaniel went to a nearby Englisch house and called 911.”
Her stomach dropped more. “Nathaniel? He was there?”
“Ja.”
Esther wasn’t able to answer. She felt as if someone had struck her. She couldn’t catch her breath. Nathaniel? He’d been racing last night? With Alvin Lee? She was rocked by the realization she must have misjudged Nathaniel as she had Alvin Lee. Many times, Nathaniel had spoken of having a gut time. Was he—what did Englischers call it?—an adrenaline junkie like Alvin Lee?
Jacob had been with him. She asked her brother about the boy, but Joshua couldn’t tell her anything. How could Nathaniel have been so careless? Blinding anger rose through her as she jumped to her feet.
“I want to go to the hospital and find out how Alvin Lee is doing,” she said.
“They may not tell you.” Joshua rubbed his hands together. “Englisch hospitals have a lot of rules about protecting a patient’s privacy. When Tildie was in the hospital toward the end of her life, I had to argue with the nurses to let some of our friends come there to pray for her.”
Esther blinked on searing tears. Though her brother was happy with his new wife and their melded family, the grief of those difficult months when his first wife had been dying of cancer would never leave him completely.
“I know they may not tell me anything, but I should go,” she said.
“You know what you need to do, Esther.” He gave her a faint grin. “I know better than to try to stand in your way. From what Isaiah told me, Nathaniel is still at the hospital.”
She glanced at the schoolhouse. “What about Jacob?”
“I don’t know. Isaiah didn’t say anything about him.” He put his hand on her shoulder. “What can I do to help, Esther?”
“Call Gerry and tell him I need him to take me to the hospital as soon as he can. He can pick me up here.”
“I’ll call from the shop.” He
squeezed her shoulder gently, then strode away to his buggy.
Esther hurried into the school. She had a lot of things to go over with Neva before she left. If Gerry wasn’t busy, his white van would be pulling up in front of the school shortly. She needed to be ready.
What a joke! How could she ever be ready to go to the hospital where Alvin Lee was badly injured? As well, she’d see Nathaniel to whom her heart desperately longed to belong...and who clearly wasn’t the man she’d believed him to be. One fact remained clear—she had to be there for Jacob because she couldn’t trust Nathaniel with him any longer.
* * *
Gerry’s white van arrived in fewer than fifteen minutes. Esther knew she must have spoken to him on the trip to the same hospital where Jacob’s onkel was. She must have made arrangements for him to take her home. She must have crossed the parking lot and entered the hospital and gotten directions to Alvin Lee’s room. She must have taken the elevator to the proper floor and walked past other rooms and hospital staff.
All of it was a blur as she stood in the doorway of the room where Alvin Lee was. She resisted the urge to run away and looked into the room. Her breath caught as the beeping machines created a strange cacophony in the small room where the curtains were pulled over the window.
For a moment, she wasn’t sure if the unmoving patient on the bed was Alvin Lee. She hadn’t imagined how many tubes could be used on a single person. One leg was raised in a sling, and she saw metal bolts sticking out of either side. Each was connected to lines and pulleys. Bandages covered his ashen face except where a breathing tube kept raising and lowering his chest. Sprigs of bright red hair sprouted out between layers of gauze. That, as much as his name on the chart in the holder outside his room, told her the man who looked more like a mummy than a living being was Alvin Lee Peachy.
“Oh, Alvin Lee,” she murmured, her fingers against her lips. “Why couldn’t you be sensible?”
She received no answer as she walked to his bedside. She didn’t expect one. A nurse, she wasn’t sure which one because everything between her stepping into Gerry’s van and this moment seemed like a half-remembered nightmare, had told her Alvin Lee was in what was called a medically induced coma. It had something to do with letting his brain heal from its trauma while keeping his heart beating. Everything else was being done for him by a machine or drugs.
She bowed her head and whispered a prayer. She’d have put her hand on his, except his had an IV taped to it.
Footsteps paused by the door, and she looked over her shoulder, expecting to see a doctor or nurse. Instead Nathaniel stood there. He was almost as haggard as Alvin Lee. A low mat of whiskers darkened his jaw and cheeks, and his eyes looked haunted by what he’d seen.
Suddenly she whirled and flung herself against him. His arms enfolded her, and his hand on her head gently held it to his chest. Her kapp crinkled beneath her bonnet as he leaned his cheek against it.
The tears she’d held in flooded down her cheeks and dampened the black vest he’d worn to the wedding. Safe in his arms—and she knew she’d always be safe there—she could surrender to fear and sorrow. She remained in his arms until her weeping faded to hiccupping sobs.
“I’m done,” she whispered, raising her head. “Where’s Jacob?” She was caught by his wounded gaze, and she wished he’d free his pain as she had. She’d gladly hold him while he wept.
Esther stiffened and pulled away as she recalled what Joshua had told her. Nathaniel had been the one to call an ambulance last night. He’d been there when Alvin Lee was racing. Had they been competing against each other?
Nathaniel put his arm around her shoulders and drew her out of the room. The beeping sound of the machines followed them down the hall to a waiting area. After she’d entered, he followed, closing the door. She looked at Jacob who stood up from where he’d been sitting on what looked like an uncomfortable chair. He appeared as exhausted as Nathaniel, and she realized the boy had been at the hospital since last night.
Jacob threw his arms around her as he had after the wedding last night. Just last night? It seemed more like a decade ago now.
She hugged the boy and kissed his hair, which needed to be brushed. As she looked over his head toward Nathaniel, she had to bite her tongue to halt her furious words. How could he endanger this boy?
Nathaniel’s brows lowered, but his voice remained steady as he said, “It was nice of you to come and see him, Esther.”
“He didn’t know I was there.”
“According to his parents, the doktors say he can hear us, but he can’t speak to us right now.”
“Like my onkel,” Jacob said as he rocked from one foot to the other. “Onkel Titus can’t talk to us because he’s listening to God now. God knows what he needs more than any of us, including the doktors. He can’t talk to us because it’s not easy to listen to God and to us at the same time.”
Her eyes burned with new tears. What a simple and beautiful faith he had! Nathaniel’s eyes glistened, too, and she knew he was as touched by Jacob’s words as she was.
Not looking away from her, Nathaniel said, “Jacob, you remember where the cafeteria is, don’t you?”
“Ja.”
“Go and get yourself a soda.” He pulled several bills out of his pocket. “There should be enough here for some chips, as well.”
The boy grinned at the unexpected treat. When Nathaniel told him he’d stay in the waiting room with Esther, Jacob left.
“Go ahead,” Nathaniel said. “Tell me what’s got you so upset you’re practically spitting.”
“You.”
“Me?” He seemed genuinely puzzled. “Why?”
“I thought you were smarter than this, Nathaniel. I thought you meant it when you said making the farm a success was the great adventure you wanted. And Jacob...how could you risk him?”
Anger honed his voice. “What are you talking about?”
“Racing! How could you race Alvin Lee when a kind was in your buggy? Was Celeste in there, too? Were you trying to show off for her?”
“I wouldn’t ever do anything that might hurt Jacob or anyone else.” His gaze drilled into her. “I thought you knew me better.”
“I thought I did, too.” Her shoulders sagged. “But when I heard how you were racing Alvin Lee—”
“I didn’t race him! He tried to get me to, but I refused.”
“I was told—”
“I was the one who went to find a phone to call 911? Ja, that’s true, but it was because I was the first one to come upon the accident.” He dropped to sit on a blue plastic sofa. “After I told him I wouldn’t race him, he took off. He must have found someone else to race because we came upon the buggy on its side only a little farther ahead. I don’t know whom he was racing because the other buggy was more than a mile away on the far side of the covered bridge out by Lambrights’ farm.”
She sank to another sofa, facing him as she untied her bonnet and set it beside her on the cushion. “The other driver just left?”
“I told the police I saw a buggy driving away beyond the covered bridge, and they’re going to investigate. Of course, it could be someone who wasn’t involved. Maybe Alvin Lee was simply driving too fast.”
“No. He’s too skilled a driver to make such a mistake.”
His brows lowered. “How do you know?”
“We all know each other in our district, Nathaniel.”
“Be honest with me. You seem to have more knowledge of racing buggies than I’d thought you would.”
Esther gnawed on her bottom lip. Why hadn’t she kept quiet? She should have pretended she didn’t know anything about the young fools who challenged one another.
He reached across the space separating them and took her hand. He clasped it between his. “I’m your friend, Esther. Tell me the truth about how you know s
o much about Alvin Lee’s racing. Did you watch him?”
“Okay, if you want the truth, here it is.” She doubted he’d think the same of her once she divulged what she’d hidden from everyone. “I know about racing. Not because I watched it, but because I was in buggies during races.”
He pulled back, releasing her hands. “You could have been killed!”
“I wasn’t. By God’s gut grace, I know now, but at the time it was only meant to be a fun competition.” She put up her hands when he opened his mouth to argue. “I learned it’s dangerous. When I realized that, I didn’t take part in any more races.”
“Why did you start?”
Heat rose up her face, and she prayed she wasn’t blushing. “Alvin Lee asked me to ride with him in one race. I didn’t want to look like a coward.”
“Oh.”
Esther watched Nathaniel stand and walk toward the hallway. Was he looking for Jacob, or was he eager to get away from a woman who’d been silly?
“Is this why you’re cautious about everything now?” he asked without facing her.
“I’m sure that’s part of it. When we’re young, we can’t imagine anything truly terrible happening.”
“Some do.”
She waited for him to explain his cryptic comment. Silence stretched between them until the faint sounds from beyond the door seemed to grow louder and louder with each breath she took.
Slowly she stood. “Nathaniel, I was foolish, but please don’t shut me out.”
“I’m not shutting you out.” He turned to look at her, his face as blank as the door behind him.
“No? I don’t have any idea what you’re thinking.”
“You don’t?” A faint smile tickled the corners of his mouth. “That’s a change. You almost always have known what I’m thinking.”
“I don’t now. I wish I did.”
He closed the distance between them with a pair of steps. Gently he framed her face between his work-roughened hands and tilted it as he whispered, “You’re curious what I’m thinking? Do you really want to know?”