by Leslie Kelly
“Thank you. Thank you, thank you,” she chanted as tears coursed down her cheeks and fell onto Sarah’s head.
Chase watched Claudia hold onto her daughter as if she’d never let her go, and suddenly the enormity of the situation descended on him. He hadn’t even considered until this moment that Sarah could easily have tumbled down while they all went about their merry evening and been lying dead at the bottom of the staircase by the time anyone even realized she was gone.
“Is she all right?” he muttered hoarsely, trying to keep his emotions under control.
“Yes, thanks to you,” Claudia replied. “She’s all right.”
Chase saw Claudia's fear receding as she tenderly stroked Sarah’s back and rubbed her cheek against the baby's soft skin. Below them, at the bottom of the stairs, Annie, Dorien and several others stared up in concern and amazement at the close call they’d witnessed.
“You saved her life,” Claudia murmured wonderingly. “Again.”
Chase didn’t reply. He couldn’t. His heart was pounding as if his chest would explode, and his breath came in short, choppy gasps. He’d never been so frightened in his life.
“I’m so sorry. It’s all my fault. I should never have left her.”
Claudia lifted her gaze to see Dorien coming up the stairs, tears streaming down her face. The elderly woman looked pale, her hands shook, and Claudia feared she might collapse.
“No, no, Dorien, it wasn’t your fault,” Claudia insisted.
Chase jumped up and took his grandmother’s arm.
“No, it was my fault,” Annie said from the bottom of the stairs. “I swear, Claudia, I didn’t take my eyes off her for more than a minute.”
“I know,” Claudia said wearily. “She’s so quick. Let’s just all be thankful she’s all right. And Dorien, please, don’t upset yourself. I know you’d never let anything happen to Sarah.”
Chase’s grandmother pulled free of Chase’s embrace and walked up the two steps to where Claudia sat rocking Sarah. Reaching out a shaking hand, she gently stroked the baby’s fine curls.
“I love her.”
“I know you do,” Claudia replied softly.
Shifting Sarah slightly, Claudia stood and carefully walked down the stairs behind Chase and his grandmother. Everyone crowded around in the foyer to fuss over the baby, who suddenly decided she didn’t like all the attention. She let out a loud wail.
“I think we’ve had enough excitement for one night,” Claudia said. “I’m going to take Sarah home now.”
“I’ll come with you,” Chase quickly said. “We can walk Dorien together, all right?” Claudia nodded and carried Sarah into the kitchen. Melanie quickly gathered up the baby’s belongings, stowing them in the back of the stroller, only after, of course, she gave her god-daughter a quick head-to-toe examination.
“Are you sure you don’t want us to drive you around to your house?” Melanie asked.
“No, thanks," Claudia replied. "I don’t really want to let this child out of my arms right now.”
Melanie nodded in understanding as Chase entered the kitchen with the rest of the group. He didn’t even suggest putting Sarah in her stroller as he walked to the back door and held it open for them. Claudia was about to most past him out of the house when she heard Andrew Worthington's voice.
“Claudia, it was wonderful seeing you again...sorry the day had to end on such a low note.”
Turning around, she gave him a strained smile. In the excitement, she’d nearly forgotten Andrew was one of the crowd who had stayed behind to help clean up. “It was nice seeing you, too," she replied.
“You’ll be seeing me again soon,” he said with a wide grin.
Turning back toward the door, she saw Chase giving Andrew a stare of pure dislike. He looked as if he wanted to slug the man, right in front of a half-dozen witnesses, but for the life of her Claudia could not imagine why. If he didn’t like Andrew Worthington, she wondered, why would Chase have invited him to a party in his home?
“I’m sorry to run out on you all. I'll be back soon," Chase said to the group.
“Hey, no problem. We were just leaving, anyway,” Ryan said as he and Melanie prepared to follow them outside. Everyone else drifted out also, calling out their goodnights across the lawn as Claudia, Chase, and Dorien walked toward the woods.
They went to Dorien’s house first. The elderly woman seemed all right, but still apologized again in spite of Claudia's assurances that she did not blame her for what happened.
“Please, Dorien,” Claudia insisted. “Don't blame yourself for this. I certainly don’t.”
“No one does, grandmother,” Chase said softly. “There was a houseful of people, yet no one saw this little one sneak away.”
“That’s right,” Claudia chimed in. “And believe me, she’s tried this at home, too. That’s why I bought the gate...she’s gone for the stairs before.”
“We just need to keep a very close eye on you, little girl,” Dorien said, finally smiling. “Heaven knows what we’ll be going through when you’re sixteen.”
Claudia laughed aloud as Chase escorted his grandmother to her door, then returned to push the empty stroller to the cottage. They walked in silence, their way well-lit by the exterior flood lights Dorien had left on, and Claudia’s own porch light.
When they reached the cottage, Chase lifted the stroller up the steps and carried it inside. Claudia carried her child up to her room. Lying Sarah on the changing table, Claudia tried not to wake the baby up as she gently slipped the sailor suit off. Claudia didn’t hear Chase enter the room, only sensing that he was behind her when a floorboard creaked.
“She’s out cold,” Claudia whispered.
“Little wonder. She’s had a long, eventful day.”
“Too eventful," she replied vehemently.
Once Sarah was ready for bed, Claudia placed her in her crib. Sarah immediately rolled onto her side, curled into a ball, and popped her thumb into her mouth. Claudia stood for a moment, watching her, again thinking of what might have happened if Chase hadn’t reacted so quickly.
“She’s a beautiful baby, Claudia," he whispered.
Claudia felt Chase standing just behind her, looking over her shoulder into the crib. She closed her eyes tightly, imagining how it would feel to lean back the two or three inches separating them and let her body rest against his. As if he read her thoughts, Chase moved closer. She felt his breath in her hair. His hands slid to her waist, and he squeezed her very lightly as if encouraging her to relax against him.
Claudia needed no further invitation. She dropped her head back, and his shoulder was there, hard yet warm and comforting all the same. He brushed his cheek against her forehead and she sighed, allowing him to wrap his arms around her waist and pull her tight against his hard body. Claudia didn't stop to wonder at his tenderness. She felt very sure Chase was still reacting to the close call with the baby. His genuine concern for Sarah had pierced that rigid shell in which he usually cloaked himself.
"Thank you for walking us home," she said softly.
Claudia nearly regretted breaking the silence because he didn't respond. Nor, however, did he pull away. Instead, he flattened his hand against her midriff and gently stroked her.
Claudia found herself closing her eyes as she rested against him. Enjoying the feel of strong arms around her and the smell of his cologne, she gave in to the sensation of being cared for.
They stood silently for several moments until Sarah moaned and rolled over in her crib. After the baby settled back to sleep, Chase pulled away from Claudia to leave the room. His face tensed in the shadow of the night light, and Claudia could practically see the rigid veil dropping over his features. Disappointment flashed through her as she sensed Chase pulling as much away emotionally as he had physically.
"I have to go," he said as they walked downstairs.
“Of course, I'm sure you still have a lot to do tonight," she answered quickly.
Hurrying, Clau
dia stumbled slightly as she opened the front door. She glanced back and saw Chase studying her intently. Feeling clumsy and awkward, she looked down toward her shoes as she led him outside.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
She nodded, but didn't look up. Claudia sucked in a breath as Chase stepped closer to her until her back pressed against the porch rail. He tipped her chin up with his index finger and looked searchingly at her.
"Claudia?"
"I'm fine," she insisted as she looked up at him. "It's just been a long day."
He nodded then stepped away from her.
"I have to thank you again, Chase," she said as he walked down the front steps. "I don’t know what might have happened tonight if you hadn’t been there for us...it seems like you’re always there when we need you.”
Chase stopped, standing silent on the lawn with his back toward her, his body hard and rigid. She nearly didn't recognize him as the same man who'd held her so tenderly just moments before.
She thought for a moment he wasn’t going to respond. Then he looked over his shoulder at her and muttered, "Nobody’s always there, Claudia. Nobody.”
Without another word, he stalked away. She watched him, amazed that his terse words could cause her a nearly physical pain. It hurt her to think of the life he had led...a life which would lead him to trust no one, and to never allow anyone into his heart.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Sarah slept late the next morning, allowing Claudia to stay in bed a little longer than usual. She really was exhausted. Sleep had proved extremely elusive the night before. When she wasn’t tossing and turning remembering the close call on the stairs, she was replaying Chase’s words, his bitter avowal that nobody’s always there.
Claudia had known from the night they met that Chase Paxton was a caring man who hid his gentle side beneath a harsh exterior. She'd gotten used to it, certain she knew him better than just about anyone else. But hearing him so utterly contemptuous of tenderness made her wonder at her own judgment.
At around eight, Claudia heard Sarah yelling from her room, and went to get her out of bed. After breakfast, Claudia wrapped the small photo album she’d been putting together for Dorien. Today, of all days, she felt, the woman would be especially grateful to receive it.
Claudia bathed the baby, and dressed her in a sweet little pink outfit with a white and pink sun bonnet and carried her to Dorien’s house. Though it was only ten, she knew the other woman would be up getting ready for church.
“Claudia, Sarah,” Dorien exclaimed when she opened the front door. “What a lovely surprise. Come in, come in.”
“I hope you don’t mind us just stopping in like this,” Claudia said as she entered the house, “but we wanted to come say good morning, and give you a present.”
Dorien smiled brightly and led them into the living room, saying, “Just having you both here is a treat.”
Claudia kept the baby on her lap while Dorien opened her gift, then watched with pleasure as the elderly woman examined each picture thoroughly. Her delight in the gift was evident.
“Thank you so much, Claudia. You couldn’t have given me anything that would have pleased me more.”
“I’m glad. Considering you’ve given this child half her wardrobe, I figured you deserved to see her model it.”
Dorien laughed and then asked if she could hold Sarah. Claudia handed her over, and Dorien tickled the baby under the chin until she giggled aloud.
Glancing around the living room, Claudia noticed several wood carvings on a low end table. She’d seen them once before, crowded on the mantle when she’d brought Sarah over, but hadn’t looked at them closely. Curious, she crossed to the table and picked them up, piece by piece, studying them closely.
There were probably a dozen pieces in all, several animals, from a grinning monkey to a wise-faced owl sitting on a tree limb, as well as a mystical looking dragon, a winged horse and a small castle. Claudia marveled at the precision of the artist. The sculptures looked as if they’d been molded perfectly, with no nicks or visible imperfections. Each piece must have taken hours and hours of painstakingly patient work.
“They’re lovely, aren’t they?” Dorien asked softly.
“Exquisite,” Claudia replied. “This unicorn is amazing. I can actually see the shy expression in its eyes.”
Carrying the baby, Dorien walked over to stand next to Claudia. The older woman reached up to the mantelpiece and picked up a carving Claudia hadn’t even noticed.
“This one is very special," Dorien said softly.
Claudia held out her hand as Dorien offered her the piece, then started in surprise. The small carving was of an ugly, misshapen toad. It had none of the mastery of the other pieces, yet even in this rough work, the talent of the artist was evident. The toad’s eyes bulged over its squat face, and a large lump distorted the proportion of its back. But the way its head was slightly cocked to the side, and its mouth pulled down into a tiny frown, seemed to reflect sorrow in the little creature.
“There’s a story here," Claudia murmured. “You know the artist?”
“Of course," Dorien replied. "So do you.”
After a heartbeat, Claudia said, “Chase?”
“Umh-humh. This little monstrosity was the first piece he ever carved.”
Claudia looked down at the piece in her hands, then at all the other carvings she'd already seen. Somehow she felt no surprise that Chase was the artist.
Claudia glanced up as Dorien returned to the sofa to sit with Sarah. Not letting go of the toad, Claudia followed and sat across from Chase's grandmother.
“My husband was wonderful with a knife," Dorien explained. "Hal learned to whittle from his father, and some of those pieces you were looking at were his. Most of the wildlife.”
“And Chase?”
“When he came to us he was only ten. A wilder boy you’d never see. He had barely attended school, was a little thief, smoked cigarettes and cussed like a sailor. And he hated everyone.”
Claudia nodded, not really surprised considering what she knew about Chase’s childhood.
“He told me about his mother,” Claudia admitted.
Dorien looked startled, but only for a moment. “Well, as you can imagine, he was a very unhappy child. Nothing we did reached him, but once in a while, you’d see those big brown eyes soften, and tears come to them, and he’d let me run my fingers through his hair or wipe a smudge of dirt from his cheek. He’d scowl at me, and duck away, but didn’t protest too much. But the one thing he’d never hide was his interest in his grandfather’s whittling.”
Sarah tired of sitting still, and wriggled on Dorien's lap. Claudia was about to reach over and take the baby when the older women placed Sarah on the floor. Smiling, Claudia watched as the child quickly crawled over to the end table and began pulling off magazines.
“Hal used to sit outside in his rocker working away and talking out loud about what he was doing," Dorien continued after a few moments. "He knew full well that Chase was hiding under the porch listening to every word. Finally, one day, he handed Chase a little knife and asked him if he’d like to give it a try. Chase was skeptical, but did it, anyway, and the child had a natural ability just like his grandfather."
Claudia nodded. There was no denying Chase's talent. She still held the proof of it in her hands.
“Anyway," Dorien said, "after Hal taught him as much as he could, he gave Chase a hunk of pine. Chase wanted to know exactly what he should make, but my husband told him to carve whatever was inside him, to look in his heart and carve whatever he was feeling, about himself, about the world...anything.”
Claudia tightened her fingers around the ugly toad in her hand, knowing full well what Dorien was telling her. She said softly, “This is what he saw when he looked inside himself?”
Chase’s grandmother nodded, and Claudia saw the tears rise in the older woman's eyes. Claudia stared down at her hands. A tear of her own fell from her cheek, landing on her finger a
nd sliding onto the toad’s misshapen head. She idly rubbed it away.
Dorien cleared her throat and nodded briskly as if to shake off the sad memory. She smiled as she said, "Things started changing then. He came to us, showed us what he’d done, and practically dared us to laugh or criticize it. My husband very carefully examined it, and told him he’d done a fine job while I hid my tears. Chase seemed different after that. He trusted us more, confided in us even, and within a few years, he was a typical exuberant teenager.”
“Exuberant?” Claudia asked doubtfully.
“Well,” his grandmother admitted with a wry laugh, “maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration. But at least he seemed happy. Chase worked on his carving and pretty soon he was even better than Hal. A few months before my husband died, when his arthritis was so bad that he couldn’t work more than an hour at a time, Chase gave him that owl. He said this time when he went to carve a block of wood, he looked inside his grandfather’s heart and saw the wisest, deepest person he knew.”
“I think your husband must have been a wonderful man,” Claudia said.
“He was indeed,” Dorien replied with a smile. “After he died, I’m afraid a part of Chase died with him. He hasn’t carved a single piece since.”
“That's a shame. He has real talent."
“Someday,” Dorien said. “He’ll come back to it someday.”
A quick knock sounded on the front door, and Claudia glanced around.
“That will likely be him,” Dorien said as she stood. Claudia quickly got up and put the little toad back in its special place near the mantle, not wanting Chase to know she and his grandmother had been discussing him.
“Well, looks like you had the same idea,” Chase said to Claudia as he entered the room.
“What’s that?” Claudia asked, forcing a note of brightness into her voice.
“Checking up on Dorien,” he explained.
Claudia nodded then watched as Chase hurried past her to where Sarah was preparing to stuff a wad of paper into her mouth.