by Joyce Meyer
I then went to another church where people were also enthusiastic about the things about which I felt strongly. They were heavily involved in witnessing to others about salvation through Jesus Christ. I was excited and deeply wanted to serve God, so I organized a group of women and we went out armed with gospel tracts every Friday. We handed them to people as they exited the grocery store and put them on car windshields in the parking lot. Within a few weeks, we had distributed ten thousand little booklets containing the gospel message. I also hosted and taught a Bible study in my home each Tuesday evening.
I was growing in God and so excited about serving Him, but then the elders of the church called me into a meeting and said I was being rebellious because I organized the women to hand out tracts without getting their permission. They also informed Dave and me that he should be teaching the Bible study instead of me. That church finally dwindled to nothing and is now non-existent simply because they tried to control people, and in doing so they often quenched the very gifts God had given.
For more years than I care to remember, I attended another church that taught good things, but to be honest, as I look back, I saw very little real love there. That church had minimal outreach and a budget for world outreach that was small and eventually eliminated. We also had leaders who were selfish, filled with pride, jealous, and even fearful of others’ success; some were controlling and extremely immature. I get irritated every time I think that I wasted so much of my life being involved in something so self-contained. The Church in general and local churches specifically are called to outreach, not in-reach. The mission of the Church is to be a witness in communities, cities, nations, and the world (see Acts 1:8).
The Church is to function aggressively in the reality of love, which the Bible clearly defines as patience, kindness, humility, joy over the success of others, unselfishness, giving, always believing the best, being quick to forgive, showing mercy rather than judgment, benevolence, good deeds, and helping the poor, widows, orphans, the fatherless, the hungry, homeless, and the oppressed. Love lays down its own life for the good of others. In fact, love must be actively involved or it dies. It must flow and grow!
What Will You Do with Your Heart of Compassion?
First John 3:17 asks an important question: “But if anyone has this world’s goods (resources for sustaining life) and sees his brother and fellow believer in need, yet closes his heart of compassion against him, how can the love of God live and remain in him?” In other words, this verse is saying that we can decide to open or close our hearts of compassion when we see a need, but if we decide to close them repeatedly, the love of God cannot stay alive and remain in us. The very nature of love requires that it be active because it is a living thing. God is love!
John made a startling and sobering comment when he said that “he who does not love has not become acquainted with God [does not and never did know Him], for God is love” (1 John 4:8). We can receive a quick education in what love is supposed to look like in everyday life by studying the steps of Jesus. Or, as one person said, “Perhaps we can learn more by studying the stops of Jesus.” He always had time for people! He always cared! No matter where He was going, He stopped to help those in need.
Let’s Get Practical
I have asked hundreds of people to share with me practical ways they believe we can show love. I have read books, searched the Internet, and been very aggressive on my own journey to find creative ways to incorporate this theme of loving people into my everyday life. I would like to share with you some of the things I have learned, but I also encourage you to be creative and then share your ideas with others. You can go to www.theloverevolution.com, which is the official website for the Love Revolution, and there you will find links to all the Love Revolution social network pages, graphics, downloads, and many tools you can use to help advance this movement. You can share your ideas with others as well as have the opportunity to learn from them. Remember… you are the Love Revolution! Without your active participation it won’t work.
Here are some ideas we have collected from various people and found:
When it is obvious that you and someone else want the same parking place, let the other person have it and do so with a smile on your face.
Mow an elderly neighbor’s lawn or shovel the snow in the winter.
Clean an elderly person’s house or offer to do the grocery shopping.
Give someone without transportation a ride to church or another event, even if it is out of your way to do so.
Truly listen to someone without interrupting.
Be a polite driver.
Hold a door open for a stranger and let him or her go ahead of you.
If you have a cart filled with groceries and the person behind you has two items, let that person go first.
Babysit for a single parent to give that person a bit of alone time or time to get a project done peacefully.
Invite a person who has no family in town to your house for the holidays.
Send cards and/or flowers to show appreciation.
Give a single mom a gift certificate to take her children out to lunch.
It Works!
One of the ideas we received was: “Secretly pay for someone else’s dinner in the restaurant where you are eating.” Dave and I do this often and have had delightful results. We saw two elderly ladies in a restaurant one evening. They were all dressed up and looked as cute as could be. We felt a desire to pay for their dinner and did so through the waiter. We asked him to let us leave first and then tell them someone wanted to bless them with their meal. Of course, they asked who it was and the waiter shared that I was a minister on television and that we just wanted to put a smile on their faces.
Several months later, we were in the same restaurant and one of the ladies came over to us and asked if we remembered her. We must have seemed unsure, so she quickly repeated the incident, and then told us that night we bought her meal was her birthday and how much it meant to her that someone would do that. She said she went about searching for my television program and had been watching it ever since. We not only had the joy of making them happy but were extra blessed that God had used us on her birthday. She is also now receiving regular teaching from the Word of God through our television program and God only knows what the fruit of that will be. So one tiny act of kindness and a small financial investment not only brought joy, but introduced her to the Word of God.
Another suggestion we received was: “Pay for someone else’s groceries at the grocery store.” Our son shared a story that touched my heart and made me proud to be his mother. He and his wife were at the grocery store and he noticed a woman who looked tired, stressed, and as though she had very little money. She was shopping with her list and appeared to be using great caution as she put items into her basket. He simply walked up to her, gave her a one-hundred-dollar bill, told her to get the things she needed, and walked off. I read once that love waits in the shadows for an opportunity to express itself, steps out, and does its work, then quickly moves back in the shadows to wait for the next opportunity. I think that is a beautiful thought, don’t you?
I frequently watch for people who seem to be discouraged and give them something monetary with the simple message, “God loves you.” Many times, I don’t even say anything about God, I simply show His character! I saw a young girl on her break at a Starbucks store where she worked. She was sitting alone at a table, looking very tired. I handed her fifty dollars and said, “I just want to bless you. I bet you work really hard and I want you to know I appreciate it.” She looked shocked and then said, “That is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”
I don’t think we realize how many people walk among us every day who feel lonely or insignificant and have had little or no experience with unconditional love. They are not accustomed to getting anything “free” or receiving anything they have not earned or deserved. I think doing random things for people just to be a blessing and for no other reason is a
n amazing way to show God’s love.
Don’t Forget to Do Good
Hebrews 13:16 urges us not to “forget or neglect to do kindness and good, to be generous and distribute and contribute to the needy [of the church, as embodiment and proof of fellowship], for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.” Although this Scripture speaks specifically about doing these things for those in the church, the point I want to make is that living in this generous kind of way is pleasing to God. There are many other Scriptures that tell us to be good to everybody, not just those we consider to be like-minded with or who are in our church. For example, 1 Thessalonians 5:15 urges us to “always aim to show kindness and seek to do good to one another and to everybody.”
Let me encourage you to think of things you can do for the people who serve you in ways such as picking up your trash or delivering the mail. These are people who are in our lives all the time, but we seldom think of what their jobs are like for them. I certainly would not want to smell and collect garbage all day.
My daughter once wrote a note of appreciation to her garbage collectors and gave them a gift card to get lunch. I think these things not only bless people, but can often be shocking too because they almost never happen. The world is filled with people who work hard doing jobs that are not very pleasant and yet nobody notices.
I once saw a woman cleaning the bathroom at a department store where I shop and I gave her some money and said, “You look like you work hard and I thought you could use a blessing.” I smiled and quickly left. A few minutes later, she found me in the shoe department and expressed her gratitude and told me how this act of kindness lifted her up.
She told me that she did indeed work hard and felt nobody paid much attention to that fact. You’ll be amazed at what will happen in your heart if you make a habit of noticing those who usually aren’t noticed. God watches out for them and He will be delighted to have you make yourself available as His partner in this endeavor.
Practice Common Courtesy
When we solicited ideas for showing love to others, one person wrote: “Always say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’” These are two forms of common courtesy and certainly, being courteous instead of rude is a way to show kindness and respect for others. I want to especially encourage you to be courteous at home with your family. I am trying to remember to always say thank you to Dave when he has done something I have asked him to do. It is very important that we don’t take our loved ones for granted. Having good manners in public should be an overflow of what we normally do at home behind closed doors.
Love is not rude, according to 1 Corinthians 13:5. Rudeness usually results from selfishness, and one way to fight it is to use good manners at all times. Our society is filled with rudeness, harshness, and crudeness, but this does not display the character of God. Jesus said He is “not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing” (Matt. 11:30), and we need to follow His example.
We certainly need to make a point of being thankful and expressing our gratitude. In several places the Bible makes the point that we are to, “Be thankful and say so.” We may think we are thankful, grateful people, but what is in the heart does come out of our mouths (see Matt. 12:34). If we are indeed appreciative, expressing thanks should come naturally for us.
Time Is a Great Gift—Give Your Talent
Whatever your particular talent is, offer it as a gift occasionally rather than always wanting or expecting to be paid for it. For example, if you are a photographer offer to take wedding pictures free for a friend or someone on a tight budget.
If you are a hairdresser, offer to go to a homeless shelter and cut hair once a month or more if you’re willing.
A friend of mine is a decorative painter and she recently spent three days painting free at a home for troubled young women.
God has given each of us abilities and we should use them to benefit one another.
I mentioned in chapter 3 a woman who had little money but wanted to support missions financially. She did so by selling her baked goods to raise money for missions. Her story emphasizes the point that if we will refuse to do nothing, we will be able to find the something that we can do, and when everyone gets involved it won’t be long and the good in our world will overcome the evil.
Set Some Goals
Let’s have goals! I am a strong believer in having goals and having a plan to reach them. You might suggest to your pastor that when everyone leaves church on Sunday they agree to do an act of random kindness within the next three hours. Just imagine what would happen if that got started worldwide!
In this chapter, I have highlighted just a few of the countless ways we can show love to others—ideas that hopefully help you understand the kind of things you can do. To say we cannot do anything is just not true. We may make excuses, but excuses are nothing more than a way to deceive ourselves and justify doing nothing. You will come alive as never before if you will aggressively reach out to others. Millions of people in the world feel they have no purpose, and they search for the will of God for their lives and live in confusion.
Let us not forget the words of Jesus: “I give you a new commandment: that you should love one another. Just as I have loved you, so you too should love one another” (John 13:34). Without a doubt, this is our purpose and the will of God for our lives.
CHAPTER
11
Find Out What People Need and Be Part of the Solution
I have become all things to all men.
1 Corinthians 9:22 NIV
Paul said that although he was free in every way from anyone’s control, he had made himself a servant to everyone. That is a pretty amazing statement if you really think about it. He was free enough to give himself as a servant without the fear of being taken advantage of. He knew that in order to have real life, he had to give his life away. He decided to live to serve and make others happy. In his daily life, he was following the example Jesus had given him.
Paul went on to say that he became as a Jew to the Jews, as one under the law to those under the law, and to the weak he became weak (see 1 Cor. 9:22). In other words, he adjusted himself to be whatever people needed him to be. He did whatever it took to win them to Christ and show love to them. Paul was highly educated, but I am sure that when he was with people who were not educated, he never spoke of his degrees or gave a discourse on everything he knew. He did not make a display of how educated he was. In fact, the following statement shows his humility and determination to never make others feel belittled. In fact, he wrote: “For I resolved to know nothing (to be acquainted with nothing, to make a display of the knowledge of nothing, and to be conscious of nothing) among you except Jesus Christ (the Messiah) and Him crucified” (1 Cor. 2:2).
When Paul was with people, he had to listen to them and take time to genuinely learn about them. I believe this is something we all need to do and I know from experience that doing so will enhance relationships in amazing ways. We should get to know people. We need to find out what they like and dislike, want or don’t want, what they need, and what their dreams are for the future. If they are weak in an area and we are strong in that area, we should make sure we don’t boast of our abilities.
Find Ways to Help People Feel Good about Themselves
I am fairly disciplined in my eating habits, and recently I spent a week with someone who really struggles in that area. The person mentioned several times how disciplined I am and how undisciplined she is. Each time she did so, I downplayed my ability to discipline myself by saying, “I have areas of weakness also, and you will overcome this as you continue to pray and make an effort.”
There was a time in my life when I would not have been so sensitive to my friend’s feelings. I would have probably given her a sermon about the benefits of discipline and the dangers of overeating and poor nutrition. However, I would not have succeeded in doing anything but making my friend feel guilty and condemned. When she asked me to share ideas that might help her I did so, but with an attitude that did not make her feel
that I had it all together and she was a mess. I have discovered that one way to love people is to help them not to feel worse about the things they already feel bad about.
Meekness and humility are two of the most beautiful aspects of love. Paul said that love is not boastful and does not display itself haughtily (see 1 Cor. 13:4). Humility serves and always does what lifts others up.
The Bible teaches us to have the same attitude and humble mind that Jesus had (see Phil. 2:5). He was one with God, but stripped Himself of all privileges and humbled Himself to become like a human being so He could die in our place and take the punishment we deserved as sinners (see Phil. 2:6–9). He never made people feel badly because they were not on His level, but instead He stooped to their level. Paul did the same, and we need to follow these biblical examples.
We All Need Different Things