by Joyce Meyer
Love people with your thoughts, and as you do you will build them up and add strength to their life.
The Power of Words We have discussed how we can use words to build others up and to encourage and edify them, but I want to drive this point home as a way to love people. We all have the ability to use words to demonstrate love to others. Just yesterday I met a real estate agent who had beautiful blue eyes so I told her that her eyes were beautiful. I could tell it made her feel good about herself. And it cost only a moment of my time and a tiny bit of effort. I saw another agent who was unusually attractive so I told her she was very pretty, and she also responded in a very appreciative and pleased manner. I used my words to build two people up, and it all took place in the course of regular business activity. As Love Revolutionaries, we must use the power of words throughout each day to love and encourage those around us.
My husband came home from playing golf yesterday, and within five minutes he had told me that he loved me and that I looked nice and worked hard. I had been working on this book for about seven hours and was ready for a break, so his kind words made me feel loved and valuable. We went to dinner last night with our son and his wife and baby. I told Nicol that she is a good wife and mother. Right before that I saw my son whisper in her ear that he loved her. These are the kinds of things we should be saying to one another throughout the day as a way of loving and inspiring confidence.
The power of life and death is in the tongue. That is an amazing thought. We have authority to speak life or death to others and to ourselves. What we speak to others has an effect on our own lives. The Bible says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (Prov. 18:21 NIV).
Words are containers for power, and they can carry either creative or destructive power, as we choose. Choose your words carefully and speak them with caution. They convey messages that can be life altering. With our words we build or tear down a person’s image of themselves. We can ruin someone’s reputation with words, so be careful what you say about other people. Don’t poison one person’s attitude toward another.
Let’s imagine your words are kept in a warehouse, and each morning you go there and peruse the shelves, selecting the words you will take with you that day as you go out into the world. You probably already know some of the people you will be with so you can select words in advance that will make them feel loved and give them confidence. Take words with you for everyone you run into throughout the day, and be prepared in your heart to be a blessing to every one of them by loving them with what you say.
Every day I want to see how many people I can lift up with my words. I’ve certainly wasted enough words in my life by speaking vain, useless things that either did nothing or made people feel badly. I am sorry for those wasted words, and I use my words now to undo the damage I have done in the past.
The tongue is a tiny muscle, but it can start destructive fires if we are not careful. King David prayed about the words of his tongue on a regularly basis. He said, “I will take heed and guard my ways, that I may sin not with my tongue” (Ps. 39:1). He prayed that the words of his mouth and the meditation of his heart would be acceptable and pleasing to God (see Ps. 19:14). He clearly knew the power of the tongue and realized he needed God’s help to stay on the right path. We should follow David’s example in that.
The Power of Possessions We all have possessions. Some have more than others, but all of us have something we can use as a tangible blessing to others. Thoughts and words are both wonderful and they help us show love, but possessions and material goods do the same thing, and for some people that is very important.
The Bible says if we have two coats we should share with him who has none and the same principle applies to our food (see Luke 3:11). The early Christian church that we see in the book of Acts was an amazingly powerful church that was growing daily. All kinds of supernatural signs and wonders and miracles were normal in their midst. The power of God was with them, and they showed love to one another with all their heart, mind, strength, and possessions.
“Now the company of believers was of one heart and soul, and not one of them claimed that anything which he possessed was [exclusively] his own, but everything they had was in common and for the use of all.”
Acts 4:32
Are we owners or stewards? Everything we have came from God, and in reality it all belongs to Him. We are merely stewards of His property. Too often we grasp onto things too tightly. We should hold them loosely so if God needs them they are not difficult for us to let go of. Let’s keep reminding ourselves that possessions have no eternal value. What lasts is what we do for others. Paul told the Corinthians that their gifts to the poor would go on and endure forever throughout eternity (see 2 Cor. 9:9).
God wants us to enjoy our possessions, but He does not want our possessions to possess us. Perhaps a good question to ask ourselves regularly is: “Do I possess my possessions or do my possessions possess me?” Are you able to use what you have to bless people, or do you find it difficult to let go of things… even things you are not using?
I receive perfume as a gift quite frequently, and since I recently had a birthday the perfume bottles were abundant on my shelf. One day I felt an urge to bless a friend who had done me a favor and I remembered that she really liked one particular type of perfume that I wore. Of course I had a new bottle with body lotion, and of course it was the most expensive one on my shelf. I had to have a short talk with myself, but within a few minutes I was able to get it off the shelf, into a gift bag, and into her hands. It made her so happy and all it cost me was a possession that could be replaced.
I implore you to start using your possessions to love people in tangible ways. Gifts are a wonderful way to show love. For example, once a friend told me my birthday gift would be late because it wasn’t finished yet. When I finally received it I was surprised to find it was a hand painting of my dog, something I can look at and enjoy for many years. I am blessed by the painting, but even more blessed by the effort she made to finish it for me.
All giving is good, but as often as you can, make a special effort to get something into someone’s hands that you know they really want. Just the fact that you listened enough to know that they liked and wanted that particular thing will bless them immensely. A friend of mine had a very special dog that died while still a puppy. She was heartbroken and could not afford to replace the dog, so I was able to get her one and surprise her. If we ask Him, God will enable us to provide for people as a means of showing love to them. He always provides plenty for us to keep and enjoy and plenty to give away, if we only hold things loosely and watch for opportunities to give.
Sometimes I go on what I call a giving rampage. I have a desire to be a blessing and want to use my possessions as a tangible way to show love so I go through my house, my drawers, my closet, and my jewelry chest to find things I can give away. I never fail to find things. It amazes me how I am tempted to hang onto them even though I may not have used an item for two or three years. We just like to own stuff! But how much better to use our possessions to be a blessing to someone else and make them feel loved and valuable.
If you are having difficulty seeing what you have to give, ask God to help you and you will quickly find that you have a wealth of things that can be used to show love to hurting people. As we use what we have for a good purpose love always increases, and other things are added to us as we show ourselves to be good stewards of God’s possessions.
[Remember] this: he who sows sparingly and grudgingly will also reap sparingly and grudgingly, and he who sows generously [that blessings may come to someone] will also reap generously and with blessings.
Let each one [give] as he has made up his
own mind and purposed in his heart, not
reluctantly or sorrowfully or under compulsion,
for God loves (He takes pleasure in, prizes
above other things, and is unwilling to abandon or to do without) a
cheerful (joyous, “prompt to do it”) giver [whose heart is in his giving].
2 Corinthians 9:6–7
When you are on your death bed, you will not ask for your bank account balance or an inventory of your possessions. You will want to be surrounded by family and friends who love you. Start building those relationships now by using all your resources to show love to people.
LOVE REVOLUTIONARY
Pastor Tommy Barnett
Revolution, n 1: the action by a celestial body of going around in an orbit 2: cycle 3: rotation 4: a sudden, radical, or complete change; esp, the overthrow of one government and the substitution of another by the governed.
Any and all of the dictionary definitions of revolution apply to your personal invitation to become part of the Love Revolution that God is expanding throughout the world.
In fact, the dictionary defines a revolutionary as one engaged in a revolution, or an adherent or advocate of revolutionary doctrines. The Love Revolution is truly a revolutionary doctrine, because the world views love as something that it must get and have, while Jesus is trying to revolutionize our thinking and our actions to define love as something that flows through us and that we must give away.
So, you are invited to participate in a unique circle of love! An ever-expanding circle with the center and circumference encompassing one goal: loving and encouraging people to follow Jesus Christ as we seek to welcome the world into God’s family.
Our radical circle of love and encouragement includes the homeless, victims of natural and man-made disasters, victims of abuse and abusive relationships, women who are dealing with abortion issues and relational hurts, those who are economically disadvantaged or lack jobs, substance abusers and a multitude of those whose hurts are too vast to enumerate! So often in the past, churches have considered people such as these the dregs of humanity, but we are looking at them as the future treasures for God’s kingdom.
The Love Revolution is simple: it begins with each one of us enlarging our circle of love to include those around us who are hurting. For many years, churches have emphasized programs to bring in new people. In alarming numbers, programs have come and gone, unsuccessful in creating enlargement. To the contrary, churches’ spheres of influence have often become circles of diminishing size. Emphasizing programs over people has not accomplished the challenge of Jesus, who declared that we must love one another.
The Challenge of the Revolution
The cycle, the circle, or the Revolution of living like Jesus for other people is a challenge the apostle Paul set before us: “Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma” (Eph. 5:1–2 NKJV).
This is the call of the Love Revolution: to walk in love, not just to decide to love. Many people know it’s the right thing to love, but how do you enlarge your circle of love? It happens in a daily walk.
We all have a circle of influence, and we all belong in a circle. Most of us enjoy a circle of friends. What is the size of your circle? How inclusive or exclusive is it? I meet many well-meaning people who appear unaware of the minuscule size of their circle. If we are living out “the Christ mentality,” and the mind of Christ is within us, each circle must exclude no one and include everyone.
Important to me, and defining my personal circle, is the issue of sinners I’m challenged to bring into my circle. I find it easy to get my hatred of sin mixed up with the sinner, causing me to hate the sinner because I abhor the sin. I have learned that God intends me to hate the sin, but love the sinner. Sometimes, our attitude toward sin can be like an encounter with a dangerous rattlesnake confronting a child. The snake is coiled and ready to strike. We hate the snake, but love the child and want to rescue the child from the fangs of potential death.
We are compelled to warn people of the consequences of sin, but we also must move in the compassion of the Lord to include sinners in my circle of love. Besides, most sinners are aware of the negative effects of wrongful choices in their life. And they don’t need someone else to come along and condemn them. Many are already tormented by the belief that the church, let alone God, will not welcome them because of their lifestyle, addictions, unfaithfulness, or gross mistakes.
People in leadership often ask us why our church in Phoenix and the Dream Center in Los Angeles purposely work with the disenfranchised, the unlovely, and the unwanted. They have made poor choices. I have never doubted God intended everyone to be in His circle of love.
If we are what we profess to be, true expressions of Jesus Christ, no one can be excluded. That includes people of different doctrines, denominations, and experiences. We must be encouragers, heralds of hope, that point people toward the unconditional love of God, and then become an evidence of it ourselves toward them.
I am not responsible for those who exclude me or include me. I’m responsible for myself, and whom I exclude. Jesus, in that universal statement when He hung on the cross said basically, “Father, forgive them because they don’t know what they are doing” (see Luke 23:34). His circle included those who crucified Him. Even His critics who mocked Him and spit on Him and cruelly offered vinegar when He asked for water are included in His circle of love.
Our circle exists to include even those who wronged us. I have learned to never fight with people in my circle. There is no battle. I am safe as long as I include all in my circle of love. Then I will not be hurt.
You cannot make too many friends, but if you have an enemy, you’ll encounter that enemy wherever you go. What you hate, you’re tied to. By accepting everyone, you begin mastering what the love of God is about. Whoever is outside your circle of love can hurt you, but whoever is inside of your circle of love will not hurt you.
The legalistic standard of religion that some often hold high is narrow and exclusive. The standard of the Love Revolution is universal. Love heals! Love restores! Love illuminates! Love lifts! The larger my circle of love gets, the happier I am and the more I can exhibit the love of God to others.
A Love Revolution in Action
When we first started the Los Angeles Dream Center, we purposefully went into an unloved area that government, churches, and even the police had abandoned as hopeless. Because we enlarged our circle of love to include gang members, runaways, the homeless, prostitutes, hardened criminals, and rejected young people, our circle of love has been enlarged to the point that Dream Centers around the world reach out to the unwanted and the unloved, displaying the love of Christ through acts of service.
Every week, hundreds of volunteers from the Los Angeles Dream Center’s Adopt-a-Block outreach (one of hundreds of aspects of the Love Revolution going out from the Dream Center) go out into the neighborhoods and simply serve their neighbors by cleaning up their yards, painting over graffiti, and serving them in a variety of ways. It’s just serving people they don’t even know to show the love of Christ.
And at a time when crime and social degradation has increased throughout the city of Los Angeles, the neighborhood near the Dream Center has seen a drop of over 70 percent in the crime rate, while multitudes have come to faith in Christ. The Rampart division, a neighborhood notorious for its corruption, crime, and sin is now a shining example of people walking out the love of Christ. That’s a Love Revolution!
Forgiving and For Giving
Have you been forgiven? Then forgive others. Love is forgiving, and love is for giving.
Giving love is one of the most difficult things to do. In many ways it’s more difficult than giving money, because love has to come from an open heart. There is no way to just make it a cold business transaction.
But many of us misunderstand what love is. We think it’s something we can receive and possess like a gift or something owed. But that’s not what love really is.
Love is something you can only give, not something you possess. None of us own love—we use love. The biblical word for love is in the active v
oice, meaning that love not given is not love at all.
Have you ever met someone who is always needing love, but never getting enough? The more they focus on the love they feel they deserve, the less love they seem to have. They are so focused on their lack that their supply is never enough.
When helping hurting people, we meet people all the time who tell us they just want to be loved by someone. I have discovered the opposite is true: we don’t need to be loved as much as we need to love someone.
When we love unconditionally, we can never become imprisoned to a man or woman. But when we demand that somebody love us, we become their slave and are easily imprisoned by their lack of love toward us.
More Important to Give Than to Receive
I believe it’s more important for people to show love than to receive it. When you show love, it turns on the heavenly faucet from which God pours love continually on us; the more love you show, the more you have and the easier it is to leave the tap on and let it flow to others.
The amount of love you have is directly influenced by how much love you give. It’s a paradox, but it’s true: the only way to hold on to love is to give it away.
The only way to hold on to love is to give it away.
If you constantly give love away, you’re always focused on what you have to give, and that supply will grow. Even if no one loves you back, you’ll have an endless supply of love through Jesus, and your life will be full of love.
When I was young, I loved people less than I do now. But I tried giving love away and found that my own supply expanded. As long as I keep using the love I have, God continues giving me deeper love.