"I thought you had to stay on board."
"Florence is covering for me," Jason explained. "She thought I needed a break."
"That's very kind of her."
"It is," Jason agreed. "You shouldn't feel obliged to go with me, however. I'm sure your cousins have plans."
Ferran gave Jason a look. "Have I done anything to suggest I would not be perfectly happy accompanying you?"
Jason shrugged. "I just want to make it clear you have options."
"I'm aware of all my options. I want to go with you."
They left the Silver Star and took a flyer to the edge of Ishtar's capital city. There was a nature preserve there, a place that Jason loved to visit whenever he had the time. Ishtar didn't have nearly the natural volatility of his home planet, but it did have incredible fauna. The preserve was less of a zoo and more like a game park, the only enclosed section being the butterfly pavilion.
There were over a thousand varieties of butterfly there, some of them native to Ishtar, some of them imported from Earth. Jason and Ferran stood on the observation deck and watched a million bright bodies flit about.
"They're so lovely," Ferran said. "Like jewels. We have something like this on Perelan, but they have dark, simple coloration."
"There's very little wildlife in Jacksonville," Jason noted. "Nothing delicate survives. I have a butterfly house, though, as part of my garden. It's expensive to maintain, but I like to look at them, and they help pollinate the flowers."
"You have something like this in your home?"
"Much smaller," Jason said with a little laugh, "but yes, something like this."
"I wish I could see it."
There was no mistaking the sadness in Ferran's tone. They both knew he didn't have time to make a side trip, not at this point. "I wish you could, too. I'd have enjoyed taking you there."
Ferran made a noise Jason had never heard from him before, something between a sigh and a whimper. The gaze Ferran turned towards him was positively wounded. "Let's talk about something else," Ferran whispered.
"All right," Jason agreed. "Why don't we go? We have dinner reservations in an hour." Ferran just nodded, and they left the butterfly pavilion in a decidedly somber frame of mind. A little time and distance seemed to help, and when they were sitting down to eat an hour later, Ferran seemed normal again.
"It's all eaten with your hands?"
"It's traditional here," Jason said as he rinsed his hands with the help of the waiter. Ferran followed suit, and then he picked up the first appetizer. "It's kind of like a competition, keeping your fingers clean while you eat. I'm not sure why." He bit into the crudite and closed his eyes briefly.
"That looks good," Ferran said, watching Jason raptly.
"Try it." Jason held out the other half, and then started in surprise when Ferran leaned over and ate it out of his hand.
"Very good," Ferran agreed a moment later, his lips curved in a saucy smile.
Jason decided at that moment not to fight it. Ferran wanted him; he wanted Ferran. Whatever happened would happen. His new resolution fit his Zen turn of mind well, and Jason immediately felt more relaxed. "You should try some more." He lifted another, different appetizer and held it out. Ferran nibbled at it, the edges of his lips brushing Jason's fingertips. "Good?"
"Delicious," Ferran replied.
They worked their way through five plates of finger foods, finishing with things that were so sweet and sticky it was impossible not to get their hands messy. The waiter was standing by with water and towels, though, and Ferran seemed to love every second of it. Jason paid, and they walked back out to the flyer. Ferran took his hand and Jason turned toward him, bringing their bodies close. "What do you want?" he asked.
"You."
"Where do you want to go? There are some excellent hotels--"
"Back to the ship," Ferran blurted, his grip tightening a little. "Back to your rooms. Please."
"All right," Jason murmured. "We can do that."
It wouldn't have been his first choice, but he wanted Ferran to be comfortable. They headed back towards the ship. The flyer was an automatic, so neither of them had to drive, which was good since the Perel had decided that his rightful place was on Jason. He straddled his lap, light and lithe against him, and ran the soft pads of his fingers over the ridges of Jason's face. Jason looped his arms loosely around Ferran's waist, not wanting to pull him any closer because he didn't want things to be over before they'd gotten back to the Silver Star. Usually, he had excellent control, but it had been a long time since he'd been with anyone else, and Ferran was beautiful and warm and wanting.
Ferran leaned closer and brushed his lips, feather-light, over the lines that his fingers had traced. He paid particular attention to Jason's eyes and ears, and when his mouth closed gently over one earlobe, Jason moaned softly, tightening his grip on Ferran's naked back. "I want to do what you like," the Perel said breathlessly. "Tell me what else you like."
"Mmm, I like you. Everything about you."
"I would do everything with you."
"God." Jason squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. "But not here. Wait until we get home, all right?"
"Until we get back to your home," Ferran agreed. He stopped petting Jason, but he didn't move, instead curling forward and tucking his head beneath Jason's chin. His quills were lax with contentment and they hadn't even done anything yet.
They managed to board without having to see anyone else, although Jason did check in with Florence before firmly bidding her goodnight. They got into Jason's quarters, took their shoes off, and Jason hung up his jacket. Then, he took Ferran by the hand and led him back into his bedroom. It was a large bed, with a simple white comforter and two long pillows, decorated with a single red stripe down the center. He stared at it for a moment, remembering, and then decided to make a new memory. "Undress," he said, turning to look at his lover.
Ferran stepped back a bit, and then smoothly pulled his tunic over his shoulders. His pants went next, sliding down slim hips and over his dark-nailed feet. The shimmering bronze fabric lay like a pool on the floor. There was a flush of color in his milk-pale skin, especially over his face and groin. He had a familiar anatomy, which was something of a relief to Jason, and he was completely hard.
"Go lie on the bed."
Ferran cocked his head a little in curiosity, but turned and crawled up onto the bed. Seeing his body totally exposed for the first time, not just his back, was enough to make Jason want to jump onto the bed with him, but he sternly reminded himself to calm the hell down. Ferran lay down on his side, curling a little, and stared at Jason.
He unfastened his shirt and took it off, folding it on top of his simple dresser. He did the same with his pants, making a neat pile, and then pushed his underwear down and off and placed them to the side. Now comfortably naked himself, he stood at the foot of the bed for a long moment, admiring the picture Ferran made lying there, sweet and wanton at once, and committed the image to his mind. "You're so beautiful."
"So are you," Ferran murmured. He stretched out his arms and Jason moved into them, curling up against his lover so that they faced each other. "Anything you want," he said. "Whatever you want."
"Lie on your back," Jason directed. Ferran did so, and then Jason began to explore him. He started the same way Ferran had, fingers drifting over his features and the smooth lines of his body, followed by lips and tongue. His eyelids quivered when Jason gently licked at them, and the same treatment of his ears provoked a guttural grunt. Jason meandered down his body, teasing three pairs of nipples, delving into his bellybutton, and then skipped his groin and caressed his thighs and calves.
Ferran whined and panted, his breaths pleading with Jason to touch him, and when he finally did, just a glance of fingers and palm, his body curled reflexively. "Jason!"
"Too light?" Jason asked.
"Too... not... more," Ferran finally said. "Again."
Jason
had noted, in their brief hands-on interludes, that Ferran seemed to prefer a light touch. His skin was highly sensitive, his proprioception incredible. It probably had to do with them being a mostly nocturnal species, accustomed to low light and visibility. He gripped more firmly, but still gently, one hand on Ferran's shaft as the other cupped his tightly-drawn testes.
"Jason!" There was need and heat and so much affection in Ferran's voice.
"Like this?" Jason breathed. "Do you want to come like this? Whatever you want, Ferran."
"More of you," his lover pleaded. "More for you. Lie with me." He stretched his arms out again, and Jason went to him, lying between his legs and pressing their erections together. He was covered in precum, as slick as if he had used the lubricant in his bathroom, and the slightest touch between them was a wonderful pain. "Jason," Ferran hissed in his ear, slipping flexible legs over his back and pulling him closer. "Jason, Jason, yesss..." They ground together once, twice, a third time, and then Jason was coming, his semen gushing between their bodies. His groan of release blended with Ferran's high, sharp cry as he came as well.
Jason gradually regained his mind and realized he was probably crushing Ferran. He pushed his weight up onto his arms and pulled back a little, looking into his lover's face. Ferran's great amber eyes were slitted, only the darkness of arousal gleaming through. His mouth was slightly open as he panted, and before he could rethink it, Jason leaned in and kissed him.
It was their first kiss. Kissing felt more intimate than sex in some ways to Jason; it was more than lust, it was permission for a partner to claim a more substantial piece of him. Kissing, to Jason, symbolized letting his guard down in a major way, and. even as he reveled in Ferran's passionate response, he wondered if he was doing the right thing. Ferran didn't seem to share his hesitancy, opening into the kiss like it was breath and he would suffocate without it. His tongue was longer and thinner than a human's, and a little rougher, but he was careful with it, only giving Jason little licks, not curling it around his throat.
Jason pulled himself away after a few minutes of kissing, heading into the bathroom for a wet cloth. He cleaned himself off quickly, but thoroughly, and then went out to where Ferran was sprawled boneless, content, and wiped him clean as well. They lay together for a while afterward, Jason on his back with Ferran's head on his chest, arms tight around his middle.
"Was it wonderful for you?" Ferran finally asked.
Jason smiled. "Absolutely wonderful. You're wonderful."
"Good." His lover snuggled in closer, pressing his nose against Jason's throat. "You're wonderful, too." He was quiet for a moment, and then said, "I could be again."
"What, wonderful?"
"Yes." One of Ferran's hands drifted down towards Jason's cock, which was taking a decided interest. "If you like."
"Oh, I think I like."
Ferran laughed, low and husky, and shifted on top of him, kissing him again before sliding down his body. After a few moments, Jason realized that his tongue was just rough enough, and more than long enough, and so wet and so tight that it was impossible not to come for him. Jason returned the favor, they rested for a while, and then, an hour before his shift started, Ferran brought him into his body. The tight, pulsing heat was so familiar, yet so, so alien, and instead of sharply-defined human muscles beneath his fingers, he gripped the trembling, crested quills of a Perel. It felt amazing, and with the edge taken off of his need, Jason prolonged their coupling until Ferran was crying out and begging and writhing against the bed, and his abandon was so gorgeous that Jason had to give him relief. He touched him, stroked him in a loose grip until his lover came, and then he let himself go. It was glorious.
There was just enough time for the two of them to shower before Jason had to leave. "You can stay if you like," he offered Ferran as he buttoned up his uniform jacket.
"I should return to my suite to change and greet my cousins, but I'd love to come back," Ferran replied.
"I'll come find you after my shift," Jason promised. Ferran drew him in close for the Perel goodbye, but this time as their temples touched, he cupped Jason's face with his right hand.
"This is how lovers say farewell," Ferran husked. Moved, Jason copied the action, and then pressed a brief kiss to Ferran's cheek before turning to go.
It was another thirteen days to Perelan, and while Jason didn't advertise their relationship, he didn't try to hide it either. His crew seemed to heartily approve, especially Florence. The other two Perels were less accepting of things. It was strange. The first day they had seemed pleased for their cousin, almost relieved, but as the cruise went on and Ferran continued to basically live with Jason, their approbation faded. Ferran ignored it, but it bothered Jason.
"Are they disapproving of me?" Jason asked him over dinner five days out from Perelan.
"Not of you specifically," Ferran assured him. "More of me. They think I am being unwise."
"I thought sowing your wild oats was an expected part of this trip for you."
"It is. My cousins simply wish I were sowing... a little farther afield. They think I'm spending too much time with you," Ferran explained.
"Ah." There was some logic to that. "And what did you say to them?"
"That how I spend my time is my business. I'll never--" He stopped abruptly, his quills sharpening and rising. They settled as he said, "I like spending time with you. I told them that. They are satisfied."
Despite their supposed satisfaction, one of the two sought Jason out at the end of his shift the next day. "May I speak with you?" he asked with cool politeness.
Jason checked his chrono. "If it's more than a simple issue, you'll have to wait fifteen minutes."
"I will wait." The Perel retreated to the observation deck below the bridge. Florence was standing with Jason, and watched him go.
"Weird."
"I think I know what this is about."
"Yeah?" Florence sighed. "Me, too."
Jason was surprised. "Really?"
"Yeah. Parr actually asked me to bring it up with you, but I didn't feel comfortable interfering with your private life, and told him so."
"This must be a new discomfort."
"You're happy," she snapped. "I'd like to see you stay happy."
"Flo... what Ferran and I have is temporary."
"Yeah, and that's a damn shame. Fucking Perelan matriarch bitches."
"Keep that opinion to yourself, Commander," Jason said sharply.
"Yes, sir. That one's Neyarr, by the way."
Fifteen minutes later, Jason joined the Perel on the observation deck. "How may I help you?"
"You may please stop encouraging my cousin."
"Encouraging him to what?"
Neyarr's quills flared. "To intimacy."
"That's a surprising statement coming from you."
"Emotional intimacy," he clarified. "He is too close to you; it will make his reintroduction to our world much more difficult. Ferran has enough challenges facing him when we reach home again. He would have been better off accepting a betrothal before leaving; it would have kept his mind more focused."
"I don't understand what specifically you're asking of me."
"To stop seeing him. Stop sleeping with him. Stop caring for him."
Jason drew in a sharp breath at the pain he suddenly felt in his chest. Stop? Now, before Perelan? "I don't think I can do that."
"You are not good for him, Captain," Neyarr insisted. "We are sent away knowing that this is the end of our adolescence. It is to be our one great look, and afterward we put aside the frivolity of childhood and dedicate ourselves to our families and our people. Ferran comes from a powerful family, and his marriage contract will be worth much to his mother despite his sterility. He must be able to enter into a contract with a clear mind and an open heart, with the memories of this time to sustain him. If you engage with him further, I fear the memories will not suffice. He will be in love with you, and he will
not be able to dedicate himself to his home properly."
"Why aren't you telling him this?"
"My brother is, as we speak. We have tried several times already, but Ferran will not hear us. I come to you in the hopes that you can keep his best interests in your heart, and do what is right for him. You are a thoughtful man. I know you will consider my words." Neyarr inclined his head, and then turned and walked off the deck. Jason turned and stared out blankly into space. Give Ferran up. Now.
He had known it was going to end, of course, he'd gone into it knowing that, but now? He didn't feel ready. He hadn't prepared himself to let go yet. He couldn't let go yet. Even as he thought it, Jason knew he was in real trouble. "Hell," he muttered under his breath. He needed to get back to his quarters.
Ferran beat him there. He was sitting on the couch, his legs curled tight against his chest, his big amber eyes fixed unwaveringly on Jason as he opened the door. "He spoke with you."
"Your cousin? Yes." Jason took his jacket off, rubbed his aching neck. He felt far too tired.
"He told you to leave me alone."
"Yes. For your sake."
"Parrel said the same thing to me."
Jason looked straight into Ferran's eyes. "They're not wrong."
"They feel wrong."
"Feelings aren't always the best indicator of what's right and wrong."
"I don't want to leave you. Alone." The pause wasn't lost on either of them. "Please don't make me go."
"Ferran..." Jason toed off his shoes and socks, undid the top button of his shirt, and came over to the opposite side of the couch. "No, stay there," he said when Ferran made as if to join him. His lover looked wounded, but obeyed. "Can you convince me they're wrong? Neyarr didn't sound like he was making thing up on the fly. I had no idea your life would be so circumscribed when you returned to Perelan."
"I told you the fate of sterile males."
"Can't you pursue an education? Your people are well-liked, couldn't you become a diplomat?"
Ferran shook his head. "Our mothers feel the need to keep us close and well in hand. They fear another great shift in our society might lead to our extinction next time."
Wild Passions Page 19