Oh, no. Oh, please, no.
“Marry me!” she said, clutching at the one thing he’d wanted. “I love you, so marry me.”
His features softened a fraction and her heart lifted. He stepped forward, captured her hands within his own and lifted her fingers to his lips. “Serenity, if you’d said that to me a week ago, I’d have jumped at the chance.”
She shook her head. “Don’t say no.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
She burst into tears.
“I knew you’d do this,” she cried. “Deep down, I always worried you’d leave me again. How can you do this to me? To Elizabeth?”
He cupped her face, kissing away her tears. “I love you both more than anything. That’s why I need to leave.”
She shoved him in the chest, a bright spark of rage igniting within her. But her anger couldn’t obliterate the shards of pain cutting her heart. “No, no …”
He caught her wrists and held her back, focusing her attention to his face, his whole expression tightened in pain.
“Do you think I want to do this, Serenity? Do you honestly think I want to leave you both? Can’t you see how hard this is for me?”
“So, don’t go.”
“I have no choice. You both mean the world to me. I can’t put you in danger.”
She fell against him, sobbing, her face pressed against the solid muscle of his chest. Her mind couldn’t handle what he was saying, every part of her wanting to deny it, but she couldn’t. Because deep down, she understood what he was saying was right. How could she have him in the house knowing the potential danger he posed to them? He’d always believed he was in control, but on this occasion he hadn’t been. If it happened once, what would stop it from happening again?
He held her until her sobs subsided.
“I need to say goodbye to our daughter.”
Serenity wiped her face and nodded, not trusting herself to speak again.
She followed him into the living room where Elizabeth sat on the floor, a couple of books open around her. In the background, the television was on low. Elizabeth wasn’t reading the books or watching the screen, but instead sat with her legs crossed, her hands in her lap, her face pale. She’d obviously overheard their conversation.
Sebastian crossed the room and switched off the television. He went back to their daughter and crouched to her level. “Elizabeth?” The girl looked up. “I have to go now, baby. Do you understand why?”
Elizabeth’s lower lip trembled as she tried not to cry. “It’s because you think you might hurt us.”
He reached out and ruffled her hair. “That’s right. And I love you both way, way too much for me to ever risk that happening. I’ll stay in touch, okay? I’ll write letters and call and I promise never to forget your birthday or Christmas.”
Elizabeth lost control, tears spilling down her cheeks. “But I don’t want you to go, Daddy.”
He reached out and smoothed her tears from her cheeks. “I don’t want to go either, sweetheart, but I have to. I’m a danger to you and your mother. I won’t ever let anything cause you harm, especially not myself.”
“But you won’t hurt us. I know you won’t!”
He shook his head. “You don’t know that, baby. The choice I’m making now is to protect you, but I’ll miss you every second of every day.”
Serenity stood back, one hand clamped over her mouth to stifle her sobs, the other held against her body for comfort. She felt the pain of him leaving twice-fold—once for herself and again for her daughter.
Sebastian picked Elizabeth up, hugging her tight. He kissed the top of her head and then carried her over and placed her on the couch. The little girl curled up in a tight ball of misery in the corner.
“I’m so sorry, baby girl. I never meant for things to come to this.”
Elizabeth didn’t answer.
Sebastian turned to Serenity. “This doesn’t mean I don’t love you,” he said, his eyes filled with a deep, soul-wrenching sadness. “I’ll still watch out for you. You and Elizabeth will go wanting for nothing. I’ll just make sure I’m a long way away from you both. There’s enough of my blood in bags in the chest freezer to keep you going, you only need a matter of drops. If you need more, I’ll send you some.”
“I don’t care about your blood.”
“You need it, Serenity, to keep yourself well for Elizabeth.”
“So good of you to realize she needs at least one parent in her life,” she spat back. Her emotions were in a whirl of torment, knowing deep down his leaving may be best for their daughter’s safety, but also hurt and angry that he could even consider an existence apart from them.
Sebastian sighed. “I’ll take Bridget’s car,” he said. “I’ll dump it somewhere a long way from here.”
“People are going to know she’s missing. The police are going to be around asking questions again.”
“Then it’s even better that I leave. Tell them I’ve left you and you’ve no idea where I am.”
She scowled. “The cops are going to start getting suspicious about how all the men in my life like to hurt people and leave.”
“I’m sorry, Serenity.” He reached for her, but she pulled away.
“Don’t be. I don’t need your pity.” She stepped away from him. “Just go,” she said, her voice hard. “If that’s really what you think is for the best, then go.”
Hurt rippled across his face, but she had no room for sympathy for him in the barrage of emotions she was experiencing.
His eyes flicked between Serenity and Elizabeth, hesitating for a moment, and then spun from the room, a howl of pain escaping his throat.
Serenity ran to her daughter, enveloping the little girl in her arms. They clung to each other, and she tried not to hear the sound of the Prius starting or the big gates of the property sliding open. Though she wanted to go after him, she refused to watch him walk out of her life for a second time.
She needed to focus on Elizabeth now, on helping her daughter through this. Though she understood Sebastian’s motives, she struggled to come to terms with the idea that he’d actually left them. The thought of not having him in her life broke her heart, but the idea of him hurting Elizabeth sickened her. To have him back would mean forever living in fear.
They would come to terms with not having him as a part of their lives, though it might take months or even years. But despite knowing all of this, Serenity couldn’t help wonder …
Would she ever see him again?
Do you love Serenity and Sebastian? Fear not! Their story will continue in Book Five, ‘Endless’, which will be released Spring 2013.
Want to stay updated about Marissa Farrar’s new releases? Sign up to her ‘new release’ newsletter on her blog!
http://www.marissa-farrar.blogspot.co.uk/
MARISSA FARRAR
THE DARK ROAD
What starts as an adventure for Sasha Mills turns into a terrifying fight for survival...
Emotionally blackmailed by the cold-footed fiancé she hasn’t seen in a year, Sasha abandons her life in London to track him in Siem Reap, Cambodia, where he’s teaching.
While in Bangkok, locals react strangely to her request to travel the following day, insisting it is a not a good day to travel despite numerous posters advertising buses running every day. Ignoring the warnings, Sasha assumes some kind of bank holiday and offers a large amount of money. She secures a seat on the solitary bus heading for Siem Reap.
Thrown together with a random group of international backpackers, including the handsome Josh, Sasha is no longer certain of what lies ahead as they cross the Cambodian border and the roads turn into dirt tracks.
Soon after, a storm like none she’s ever witnessed before descends upon them. When one of their group disappears off the side of the road, Sasha realizes she has more than just the warnings of land mines to worry about.
One by one, the travelers lose their minds as they are plunged into the terrifying secrets of
the Dark Road.
MARISSA FARRAR
UNDERLIFE
Thomas Young has no idea where he comes from.
Found living on the streets as a child and put into foster care, he’d always dreamed of having a family of his own. Now a grown man, he has his much longed for family, but his life is tinged with sadness. His son, David, has leukaemia.
One night, as he's driving home from the hospital, he hits a homeless man, Mack, with his car. Mack claims he knows Tom from his childhood. He tells Tom he was once part of London's underground homeless and his son's leukaemia is not all it seems.
In a desperate bid to save his son's life, Tom heads down into the miles of abandoned tubes lines and stations. But he quickly discovers there is something far more sinister than giant rats, drug addicts and fast trains below London’s streets.
There is also something dark and shadowy, and it wants out...
Also by Marissa Farrar
The Serenity Series:
The Vengeful Vampire
Alone
Buried
Captured
Dominion
Coming Spring 2013, Book Five in the ‘Serenity’ Series, ‘ENDLESS’
UNDERLIFE
(Please note, the prequel to Underlife, Go Back, is now free to download from Amazon)
THE DARK ROAD
WHERE THE DEAD LIVE
IN THE COMPANY OF THE DEAD
THE BODY FARM
About the Author
Marissa Farrar is a multi-published fantasy and horror author. She was born in Devon, England, has travelled all over the world, and has lived in both Australia and Spain. She now resides in the countryside with her husband, two children, a crazy Spanish dog, two rescue cats and six hens and ten goldfish. Despite returning to England, she daydreams of one day being able to split her time between her home country and the balmy, white sandy beaches of Spain.
Even though she’s been writing stories since she was small and held dreams of being a writer, her initial life plan went a different way.
In her youth, inspired by James Herriot, she decided to become a vet, and would regularly bring home new pets to her weary parents. Upon discovering her exams were never going to get her into a veterinary degree, she ended up studying Zoology. Once she completed her degree and realised she’d spent the majority trying to find time to write, she decided to follow her dream of being an author. Seven years later, she was published and two years after that she was able to say goodbye to the day job.
However, she’s continued to collect animals!
Marissa is the author of four novels, including the dark vampire ‘Serenity’ series. Her fifth novel, Underlife, a dark fantasy set beneath the streets of London, will be published September 2012.
Her short stories have been accepted for a number of anthologies including, Their Dark Masters, Red Skies Press, Masters of Horror: Damned If You Don’t, Triskaideka Books; and 2013: The Aftermath, Pill Hill Press.
If you want to know more about Marissa, then please visit her website at www.marissa-farrar.blogspot.com. You can also find her at her facebook page, www.facebook.com/marissa.farrar.author or follow her on twitter @marissafarrar.
She loves to hear from readers and can be emailed at [email protected].
To read interviews with Marissa, just follow these links!
Talking Supe
The Paranormal Romance Party
Writers and Authors
Stacey Eaton.com
fReado
MadSheep Reading
Dominion Page 23