by S. E. Babin
Katie jerked out of her lascivious thoughts. “It’s just pressing a button,” she said.
“Katie, you geek. You have a stranger lying on the couch with one thin layer between his ding dong and the world. In the movies, this is where the woman calls the police and runs out of the house screaming. Although, since we carried him inside, and now in hindsight that doesn’t seem very smart, you better hope this doesn’t turn into a horror movie and he doesn’t wake up with a giant knife. It’d be a shame for me to walk in and find your pretty blonde self in pieces on your nice wooden floor. So learn the Taser. And quick. Yes, it’s just pressing a button, but it’s a very important button!”
Katie grimaced. “Thanks for the visual. And thanks for killing any security I had. So, after that gory speech you’re just going to leave me with what could be the possible reincarnation of Jason?”
Mel tsked. “In normal circumstances, no. My ass is on the line today, Katie. I don’t have time to talk about it right now. Besides, he’s way too cute to be a spawn of Jason. Think more along the lines of Ted Bundy. Now that was a handsome serial killer.” She waggled her fingers at Katie as she headed out the door. “Keep your cell phone on and have 911 on speed dial. I get the feeling that he’s harmless, maybe just a guy who tied one on a little too well last night, but you can never be too careful these days.”
Just before the door clicked shut, Katie shouted, “If I die, I’m coming back to haunt you!”
“Why would you haunt someone? Are you sick?”
Katie screeched. Crash. She stared at the remains of her cell phone lying in pieces on the kitchen floor. Please God, don’t let him be a serial killer.
The Adonis lying on her couch was awake and staring at her with a bemused expression. The blanket slipped lower as he sat up, giving her a tantalizing glimpse of the golden blond happy trail hiding the one thing Katie couldn’t seem to stop thinking about.
“I…ummm.” Get it together. “No. Not sick.” Heat trailed up from her neck into her cheeks.
He smiled, and heaven help her, his teeth were perfect. Of course they were perfect. Maybe he’s dumb, she thought. You couldn’t have someone that pretty with a high IQ. It was against the rules of nature.
“Good, that wasn’t in the paperwork,” he said.
Katie frowned. Paperwork? She shook her head. This dude must still be hung over. “So, do you want to explain why you were outside my house without any clothes? Must have been one hell of a party.”
A wrinkle appeared between his perfect eyebrows. “Party? I did not attend a party.”
It was Katie’s turn to frown. “Ooookaaay. No party. Then how did you end up here?”
His grin lit up the room. “You created me, Katie Walker. I am here for you. To serve you. To be your perfect man.”
Katie chuckled nervously and backed toward her kitchen sink, the Taser clasped securely in her right hand. “I’m flattered, but you can’t just show up like that and say weird shit. It creeps people out, you know? And how do you know my name, anyway?”
He stood up, the blanket falling away. Katie gulped, beads of sweat breaking out against her forehead. Oh my God. Mel is right. I’m going to get chopped into a million pieces.
He paused, his hands up in placation. “I’ve frightened you. My apologies.” He bowed and stood there, naked as the day he was born, and completely unconcerned about it.
She stopped, her hands behind her back. She flipped the switch on the Taser and prayed she wouldn’t zap herself. She cursed Mel for leaving her alone.
“Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Leo. I’m a product of the List.”
“The list?” Katie was dumbfounded. There was a crazy bird in her house and she had willingly let him in.
“No. The List.” He pronounced it with reverence. “Your List.”
The only list Katie could think of involved four drunk women with too much time on their hands. “I think you need to leave.”
Leo didn’t budge. Instead he raised one clenched fist up toward his chest. “Bench Press two-fifty.” He held one finger up. “Blonde.” Another finger came up. “An orphan.” Yet another finger. “No prison history.” Another finger raised. “And no out-of-wedlock babies.” The last finger came up.
Katie stood there in shocked silence as Leo ticked off the attributes on her list that only she and her other three friends knew.
When she said nothing, Leo raised his other fist. “I shall continue. Well-endow—”
“Stop!” Katie shouted. “I can see that.”
Either her friends were playing one hell of a joke on her or some seriously weird shit happened the night they made that list up. Staring at this man, looking down at her with admiration written all over his features, she was terrified it was the latter.
“You were spying on us, weren’t you? What kind of creepy perv does that?” Katie felt anger pour through her veins. “You didn’t have anything better to do than to peek inside my house?” She clenched the Taser so tight her hand ached.
A perplexed look stole over Leo’s face. “Spying?” He cocked his head and stared at her. “Why would I need to spy? Everything is in my database.”
“Stop saying crazy shit like that!” Katie screamed. Leo’s eyes widened. He raised his hands and took a step toward Katie.
“Don’t come one step closer to me!”
Leo halted. “Katie, I—”
Katie’s hands shook with fear and anger. “There’s only one way you could know all of this. And it isn’t because you fell out of the sky. Did you bug my house?” She looked through the kitchen for any signs of protruding wires. “Who the hell are you? I’ve never seen you before in my life. Why would you care about us? And how do you know my name?”
Leo blinked at the rapid-fire questions. “I did not ‘bug’ your house. I don’t see how spiders could help me gain information about you. I’ve told you who I am.” He started to take a step toward her, but paused as Katie raised the Taser and pointed it at him. “And, I care about you because I was made to care about you.” He smiled. “I know your name because all of your information was downloaded into my database. I know your likes, dislikes, the type of underwe—”
“Whoa, buddy,” Katie interrupted in a tremulous voice. “You aren’t helping your case any.” She didn’t move the Taser down, but instead focused the laser right in the middle of his chest. “If you even think about breathing wrong, I’m going to shock you into next week.”
Leo cocked his head to the side again, reminding Katie of an owl. “I will not hurt you. I promise.”
Katie made a harsh sound of disbelief. “That’s what all the bad guys say!”
He took a step toward her. “I am not a bad guy.”
Katie’s hands shook. She was afraid of Leo, but she was also afraid of using the Taser. As much as she didn’t want to get hurt, she didn’t want to hurt someone else. He looked harmless enough, but didn’t all serial killers look that way? She racked her mind, images of all the cop shows she’d ever watched flying through her head. He smiled at her and opened his arms.
Was he going to hug her? He kept advancing forward. Katie’s heart pounded with fear and uncertainty. “Get out. This is your last chance.”
Leo frowned. “Why would I leave? I am here for you.”
That was all the creepy info Katie needed to hear. She depressed the red button and the prongs of the Taser flew out and hit Leo right in the lower chest. A look of outraged surprise flickered across his face and he dropped like a stone, blue sparks shooting out wildly from his body, lighting Katie’s home up like a 1970s disco club.
Leo’s body twitched and jerked for a moment until it suddenly stopped and fell dead still. Katie dropped the Taser and put her hand to her mouth to stifle the scream she knew was coming. Oh, God. Did she kill him? She’d never murdered anyone in her entire life. She took a couple of steps closer and peered down at him. Faint blue light flickered through his body. Something clicked in the back of her mind. It was the sam
e blue light from her computer earlier.
Katie frowned. There was no way this guy was an android. Weird Science was not actually true, and men didn’t just fall out of the sky when women got drunk and wished for them. Bad quotes from Terminator kept playing through her head. If Will showed up at her door and said to come with him if she wanted to live, she’d pee herself.
She needed to get him out of her house because the odds were good he’d be pissed when he woke up. She decided not to call the police, even though she knew it was the rational thing to do. The blue light inside of him wasn’t normal, and she didn’t feel right turning him over to the authorities if he was sick. Maybe he was one of those people who volunteered for government medical trials. Her thoughts spun wildly out of control and right down the rabbit hole.
She shook herself out of her panicked thoughts and set the Taser down on her kitchen counter. Throwing him out into her front yard didn’t seem to be the intelligent thing to do, especially since it was broad daylight outside. She chewed the side of her thumbnail. She could dump him in the backyard where no one would see and refuse to let him back in once he woke up.
If he woke up.
Shit. If Leo had made her commit her very first murder she was going to kill him.
They didn’t make supposed androids very light these days. Katie grunted and swore as she dragged Leo across the floor to her back door. She let his head clunk against the floor as she opened it and stepped outside. Sweat clung to every orifice and she wiped her face against her sleeve. Jesus. What a mess. She stepped onto her back porch and peeked discreetly over the fence to Will’s house. She had a feeling he would have a field day with I-told-you-so if he saw what was going on.
His house was silent and still, and Katie could only pray he’d left during the short time she and Mel had dragged Leo inside. She turned back to the task at hand, trying not to stare at Leo’s junk. After the last few minutes, she was now familiar with the smooth expanse of his chest and his family jewels, considering her face had been in that area several times so far. She didn’t know how murderers did it. Maybe that was why so many of them were male. Dragging a body all over the place was a serious pain in the ass.
She finally got him outside, down the porch stairs and into her yard. She stepped back and admired her handiwork. She hoped he was still alive. The blue flashes inside of him hadn’t quieted down yet, so she could only assume there was some life left in him. Hopefully he had years left of harassing other people besides her inside of him.
She rubbed her hands against the outside of her arms. It was chilly outside. Her mouth twisted as she eyed Leo’s naked body. He was going to wake up freezing. Katie shut her eyes and screamed silently at her conscience to shut up. There was no way she was going to bring him back inside.
No way.
Her shoulders slumped. She wished to God she didn’t have proper Southern manners. She stared at the still unconscious man and made a choice. She wouldn’t bring him back inside. But she would give him a blanket. She guessed it was more than most women would do. Katie hurried back inside, rummaged through her old cedar chest and pulled out a heavy flannel blanket. She flew back down the stairs, tucked the blanket in around him and rushed back inside. Katie locked the door behind her and rested her head on the doorframe. She peeked outside the curtains, expecting what? Him to get up and do the Macarena?
He lay still as death, and as much as it pained her, she felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. Not enough to go back outside and get him; she did have some sense of self-preservation, but maybe she should at least have listened to what he had to say. She flicked the curtains closed and headed back into the kitchen to make a strong cup of coffee.
Her hands shook as she pulled down a mug and filled it. What a weird-ass day, and it was only getting started. She carried her mug over to the couch, sat down and tried to organize her thoughts. Katie knew she wanted to be in a relationship. She wanted it all…the white picket fence, the ankle biters, the reliable four-door car. But she wanted something as normal as possible. Leo was handsome as sin, she couldn’t deny that, but it was probable he was either a sociopath or a super-friendly psychopath, plotting her demise while disguising his plans under a panty-dropping smile.
She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, silently freaking out and wanting to do nothing more than call Mel. She’d feel terrible when she heard what happened. But, Katie was alive and her sort-of virginity was still intact. It had been just that long since she’d felt a man against her. She groaned and clapped a hand to her face.
“What the hell is going on?” she muttered to herself. She set her now-cold coffee down and padded to the back door. She flicked open the curtains, fully expecting to see Leo still lying prone in her yard. Instead, the only thing outside was the slight depression in the grass where he lay only a short time before. Even the blanket was gone.
Katie’s heartbeat rapidly picked up. Where could a naked man go in broad daylight? She rushed to her front door, opened it and stepped out onto the porch, looking frantically up and down the street. Nothing.
Leo had gone as strangely as he’d arrived. As bizarre as the entire thing was, she couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed. And that was more disturbing to her than the scene just a little while ago.
Chapter 5
After spending the rest of the day trying to wrap her head around the earlier events, Katie finally gave up trying to understand it. Maybe Leo was just one of those bizarre occurrences she’d laugh about later. She fully expected to see him getting put into a squad car on the six o’clock news. A glutton for punishment, Katie pulled on some warm clothes, grabbed a blanket and sat in the rocking chair on her front porch, hoping against her better judgment to see him again.
She rocked for a little while, lost in her thoughts, when she saw Will crossing the yard to her house. He was wearing beat-up jeans, a flannel shirt and old work boots. Scruffy as he was, Katie couldn’t stop her traitorous heart from picking up speed. Her mouth dried out as she watched his self-assured swagger. As he got closer, he held up the six-pack of beer he was holding.
“Mind if I join you?”
Katie shook her head and gestured to the small iron patio seat next to her. Will clomped up the steps and settled his tall frame into the chair. He didn’t speak, only twisted off a bottle cap and handed her a beer. She gratefully took it and tilted the bottle up to take a long swallow.
Will twisted off his cap, took a drink and gave her a piercing look. “What happened to the naked guy?” he finally asked.
Katie shrugged. There was no way she was going to tell him about what happened. No way at all. “He left,” she said after a too-long pause.
One of Will’s eyebrows rose, waiting for her to elaborate. She didn’t.
“What was his deal anyway? Did his friends dump him out on your driveway?”
Katie couldn’t look away from his piercing topaz gaze. Good gracious, he was pretty. She cleared her throat. “Something like that. He didn’t remember much.”
“Mmm.” Will settled back into his chair, and they watched the slow traffic on their street.
Katie loved this neighborhood. She loved the people, including the nosy neighbor across the street. She loved the tall older trees and the small hometown feel it emanated. She loved the small houses with their meticulously landscaped yards. And, as much as she hated to admit it, she kind of liked the man sitting beside her. The one she had just officially met a couple of days ago, and the one she kept embarrassing herself in front of.
His voice broke through to her before her thoughts took her off on a path she didn’t want to examine too closely right now. “Have you recovered from girls’ night yet?”
Katie laughed. “Took me awhile, but yes. Thursday was pretty crazy.” She looked away from him as she felt her cheeks redden. “And, I’m sorry about climbing into your window.”
Will chuckled, the sound of it making Katie tingle all over. “I can honestly say I’ve never had a beautifu
l girl try to break into my house before.”
She stilled. He thinks I’m beautiful. Be cool. “Peer pressure,” she joked, “and plenty of wine.”
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Will put his beer on the table. “Katie?”
She shifted in her seat so her body faced him. He looked nervous. “Yes?”
He smiled then, a wide grin that took her breath away. “You still looking for that date?”
Her mouth dropped open. Was he asking her out? She blinked. Silence stretched on as her thoughts scrambled to give him an answer. It was yes, of course it was yes, but she couldn’t believe he was actually asking her out.
“I, ummm…” She struggled to get the words out. He sat there, staring at her, amusement tugging his lips upward.
“Katie?” A voice from below the steps jolted her out of her blonde moment. Will turned toward the sound and his body stiffened. Dark anger crossed his face like a shot and then it was gone. Katie looked at the cause of it and lost her breath.
Leo stood there, wearing only her flannel blanket and an apologetic look on his face.
Her attention flew to Will, still staring at Leo. “Will, I—”
He put a hand up, silencing her. “No matter,” he said and got to his feet. “I’ll leave you two alone. It looks like there might be some unfinished business here.” He gathered his empty bottle and the rest of his six-pack and brushed against Katie as he walked down the stairs and back to his home.
She wanted to scream. Instead, she looked at the cause of her problem. “So, you’re alive.”
Leo looked a bit worse for wear, but he was walking and talking, so at least Katie didn’t have to worry about a criminal record. “I am, although I have to admit that gadget you have did a number on my wiring."
Unwanted guilt and sympathy flooded her. “It’s not every day someone shows up in a single girl’s house talking about being ‘made’ for them.”
He had the grace to look sheepish. “I realize now that wasn’t the right way to ease you into this. But—” He pulled the blanket against him and shivered. “—it’s true.”