by Fleur Smith
When Clay ushered me into the seat, Ethan rose and kissed my cheek lightly. Testament to Clay’s good mood, he didn’t even flinch when Aiden copied the action.
“We’ve been discussing the future of the Rain,” Ethan said. “Clay thought you might be interested in learning more about it.”
Clay smiled smugly at me when I glanced over at him. I’d been asking him questions about the Rain as often as I dared, but each time he’d simply told me that he didn’t know what was happening. Obviously he’d planned this reunion.
“Dad has gone into hiding,” Ethan said. “And so has Abe.”
I wasn’t certain how I should feel. Relieved that neither of them would pose an immediate threat? Sad that they’d escaped and might potentially hurt us another day? Both emotions played out within me, but overwhelming both of them was apathy. Even though both Troy and Abe had been key players in the U.S. branches of the Rain, their absence didn’t really change anything. The Rain would still exist—and they would still hunt me.
“Isn’t there someone else who has stepped up and taken Abe’s place?” I asked.
“There is.” Ethan grinned, and I thought it was ridiculous that he seemed happy at whoever the new leader of New York was. “Ben has taken over in his father’s absence.”
I nodded; it didn’t surprise me at all. He seemed to share his father’s hatred for all things other. It was easy to recall the hatred he’d shown me during the journey into the Rain.
“It might surprise you to know that he’s—” Aiden’s words cut off when a peal of bells and trumpets signaled the arrival of a guest of honor.
There was a commotion at the door to the banquet hall, and I gasped as I recognized the newcomer as the very person we’d just been discussing. His rich skin stood out in the sea of opaque white fae, but when he smiled at Louise and moved through the crowd, there was an ease about him that suggested it wasn’t his first visit.
“—coming tonight,” Aiden finished.
“Why?” I asked with a horror-struck tone. A chill raced through my body as I recalled the last time I’d seen him—cocking his fingers like a gun at me moments before we’d turned the tables during the rescue we’d staged at the Bayview Hotel. The chill was an odd experience; I was so used to my veins heating with fire each time I was afraid. “Why would he come here?”
Aiden laughed. “It would appear that he was not so much dedicated to the cause as he was committed to supporting a particular person’s plight.”
He nodded toward Fiona’s table, and I glanced up to see Louise leaving her chair and making her way through the crowd to meet Ben. A pink blush stained her cheeks as her mouth stretched into a wide grin, and, for perhaps the first time ever, she looked utterly stunning despite the scarring over her cheek.
“You mean Louise and . . .?” I trailed off as I watched Ben pull her into his arms and press a soft kiss against her lips.
Clay’s body stiffened beside me, and I glanced at him to figure out what his problem was.
“I still don’t understand why on Earth she would want to be with him,” he seethed. “He tried to kill you.”
“He also helped free the rest of the prisoners in Bayview,” Ethan said. His words were clearly a warning and possibly something of a reminder to Clay.
“Why would he do that?” I asked, still feeling slightly lost in the conversation. He’d threatened to kill me two weeks earlier. Aiden’s words played in my head, but how could that affect such a huge turnaround? “Like Clay said, he tried to kill me.”
“I don’t think he’s cared about the company line for a long time now,” Ethan said.
Clay rolled his eyes and huffed.
“Lou helped him after one particular case,” Ethan continued. “Since then, he’s cared more about impressing her than about the specifics of his kill sheet.”
“And what’s that got to do with me?”
“Lou hated you, ergo Ben hated you. If she wanted you strung up on the wall and torn into pieces, he’d have done it for her.”
Clay’s hold on my hand tightened in response to Ethan’s words. A shudder ran through me. It was always disconcerting to hear them talk so plainly about murder. Ethan gave me a look that seemed to indicate he understood.
“Will he still do that?” I asked, feeling the chill of terror in a way I never had with the fire that used to run in my veins.
“Not unless Lou asks him to,” Ethan joked.
“Which she won’t,” Clay reassured me after shooting Ethan a glare that could kill. “Lou doesn’t hate you, Evie. In fact, I think she’s starting to understand the struggle you’ve faced more than Eth or I ever could. She’s got these new powers and abilities she still doesn’t understand.”
“And Ben’s helping her,” Ethan added.
I sat back and considered what he was saying. A new Rain willing to consider that not all others were evil. It seemed too good to be true, and I wasn’t sure how much I could trust it.
“So Ben’s really on our side now?” I asked, glancing over to watch him and Louise talking and smiling as I said the words.
Ethan laughed. “I’d say he’s on her side.” He nodded toward his sister.
Clay gave another grumble about Ben not being good enough for his sister.
I stifled a laugh as it became abundantly clear that maybe I hadn’t fractured the relationship quite as much as I’d originally thought—not now that the us versus them nonsense was behind the two of them. I also didn’t remind him that Louise had tried to kill me too for a time, even if that hadn’t been entirely her own choice.
“I don’t know,” I said thoughtfully. “I think they make a cute couple.”
Ethan and Aiden laughed with me as Clay sat and stewed.
“So you were saying about the Rain?” I asked when the commotion the arrival caused died down.
“I think it’s changing,” Ethan said.
“Changing how?”
“It’s been coming for a long while, Evie,” Ethan added. “Ever since the information Cl—”
A bang echoed out under the table and Ethan glared at Clay, who glared right back.
“Ever since certain information came to light around a year ago, some operatives started whispering about their discomfort in the indiscriminate killing. There are pockets all over the world that have been running that way covertly for years. It’s never been something that’s been openly discussed, but in the last few months, it’s been the worst kept secret in the Rain.”
“Okay?” I wasn’t sure exactly what that meant, or why he’d kept the information hidden.
“It’s been hard to know who could be trusted to discuss the shifting loyalties and who might turn people over for retraining as soon as possible. But there have been fractures forming. What happened at Bayview caused them to splinter. Battle lines have been drawn. Those wanting the new way are streaming to our side in support.”
“He held up his hand to ensure he got continued silence. “Before you go getting too excited, I don’t think the battle is over yet. After all, there are some very old traditions in place, some of which the controlling members have warped to suit their own needs, but I think a more open-minded approach might start to filter through the ranks everywhere. Bayview is now firmly in the camp heralding a new direction.” He glanced over at Louise and Ben with a smile that told me he was happy to see her happy and not consumed by her hatred and jealousy for once. “In fact, there’s even talk of an alliance now.”
I tilted my head to the side in question.
“Without having to spend so much of our time trying to protect our family and others from the Rain, we will have additional time to assist,” Aiden said. “At least with anything that may endanger the court. It will provide us with the opportunity to work together to eliminate the real threats.”
“There’s probably even room in the new, improved ranks for half-fae, ex-Rain operatives with phoenix fiancées if you’re interested, bro,” Ethan said to Clay.
; For an instant, Clay’s face lit up like a beacon before he tampered it back down. Although he’d tried to keep it hidden, I knew he missed certain aspects of the job. Not the mindless killing, but the saving lives. Glancing at his doubtful expression, I hoped he wouldn’t say no just for my sake. I was happy for him to do whatever he needed to do.
After witnessing the destruction of the wendigo and Caelan, I understood more than most that some supernatural species did intend to harm humans. The protector inside me was more than willing to do whatever I could to help.
I placed my hand over Clay’s and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “There just might be.”
His mouth twisted into a frown. “We’ll see.”
CHAPTER SIX
IT DIDN’T TAKE long for Clay and me to settle into the routine of court life. Because I was still recovering, and also—according to both Fiona and Aiden—a guest at the court, I wasn’t required to help with any tasks. However, Clay was the son of the matriarch and new to the life, so Aiden often took him away for hours at a time to learn the ways of the court. During these times I found myself alone, almost like I had been the first time I lived with the fae.
To fill my alone time, I visited the places that had once held comfort for me. The classrooms and the library mostly. Wherever I went, though, Louise seemed to be there. Whenever I saw her, information Clay had relayed to me over the past few days and weeks came to mind. As the eldest daughter of the queen, she had to learn every aspect of the court—decades of training—in as short a time as possible. Her birthright was to one day claim the rule of the court, unless she elected to pass the title on to Mackenzie. Fiona wouldn’t allow her to make that decision until after Louise had completed her training though.
The first few times our paths crossed, we’d done little more than nod in acknowledgement of each other. Over a handful of weeks, we finally worked our way up to saying polite hellos as we passed each other. I didn’t think we’d ever be friends, but if my life so far had taught me anything, it was to never say never. At least half the time I saw her, Ben was a fixture at her side. At least, he was there as often as his duties as the new head of the New York division of the Rain would allow.
Clay had taken to splitting his time three ways. He spent every night and as much of his days as he could with me. When we had that time, we would lock ourselves away and find new and creative ways to use all the furniture and various surfaces in our bedroom. A few days a week, he would help with the fae court. Mostly, he spent these days shadowing Aiden. He never spoke of what they did, but sometimes came home refreshed and happy, and other times drawn, pale, and visibly upset.
The rest of his time, he spent helping Ben and Ethan with the Rain. It was a monumental task trying to institute a new order—one where beings like me weren’t deemed evil just because we were more than human. So many wanted to cling to the old ways, so Clay used his influence to sway them to at least try the new method. It worked better for some operatives than others. Some simply refused to listen because Clay and his siblings were now others themselves—the rumors and gossip surrounding their fae nature had spread like wildfire through the ranks.
Because of how busy he was, I didn’t mention my own worries to him. On top of the unfamiliar chill in my body caused by the absence of the sunbird, an array of other symptoms had made an appearance. At first, I thought the dizzy spells were just my body’s reaction to the sudden change in my body temperature, but then the nausea started.
It was almost the middle of March, almost six weeks after I’d woken in the court to find the sunbird gone, when I finally gathered up the courage to send for Mackenzie. Because she was a healer, I hoped she’d be able to reach a diagnosis. I hadn’t expected her to find it quite so quick though. In fact, seconds after she’d touched my aura, she’d told me exactly what was wrong. Then she left, promising to go fetch Clay for me while I sat on the bed to come to terms with her news.
While I waited for him to arrive, my mind spun with the possibilities and implications. What was already a complicated situation was about to get a hundred times more complex.
And God, what would Clay think when I told him? He didn’t even know I’d been feeling off. It had probably been foolish keeping my symptoms hidden from him as long as I had. After all, it was no different than him keeping quiet on the fae sightedness before our Bayview visit. At least by waiting, I had an answer to give him rather than just a list of complaints.
“Evie, what is it?” His voice filled the room before the door was even fully open. I wondered what Mackenzie had said. “Mack said you needed to see me and impressed on Mom that it was important I come right away. Is everything okay?”
His concern made my heart race.
“Clay,” I said, wringing my hands together in a feeble attempt to stop my nerves. We’d discussed the possibility, but . . .
What if he isn’t ready? A wave of nausea rolled through me. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it?” he demanded. He’d already been on edge when he’d come charging into the room, and my nerves weren’t helping.
“I didn’t tell you, but I’ve been feeling off since a little while after the sunbird left.” The moment the words escaped, his body grew rigid and his eyes widened with concern. I reeled off my list of symptoms. “I didn’t want to worry you when you’ve got so much going on. But I didn’t want to ignore it either. So I saw Mack.”
“What does she think it is?” he asked. “Is it something serious?”
“It is,” I said before swallowing hard. It was everything. “Incredibly so.”
He clutched at my hand desperately, stilling my anxious motions, as tears pricked the corners of his eyes.
I realized I’d selected the wrong words and had only added to his concern.
“No, it’s nothing like that. It’s nothing bad,” I said. When I met his gaze, I found the words I hadn’t even admitted to myself. “Clay . . . I’m pregnant.”
“Really?” he asked. Disbelief colored his voice, and his eyes were wide and unsure.
It was a reaction I understood—I’d been feeling it myself since Mackenzie had told me. For so long, I’d been certain that I’d never have a baby. While the sunbird warmed my body, it was impossible. The only way I would have borne a child then was through my death.
Even though Clay had mentioned the remote possibility that I could have a child the conventional way when he shared what he learned about the sunbird, I’d never believed that I would live to see it come true. There was too much we’d faced. Too many battles. Now that it was happening, it still felt more than a little surreal.
I would actually get to hold my daughter in my arms in a way my mother, and her mother before her, had never been able to.
A chuckle escaped Clay’s lips. “Wow. Evie, I . . . I don’t know what to say.” The corner of his lip twitched upward, and his hands left mine to brush at the back of his neck. He pushed himself off the bed and started to pace.
I wrung my hands together as I watched his nervous reaction. “Are—are you happy?” I asked, the words burning my tongue. What if the answer was no? The baby wasn’t expected, or planned for, but I was beyond happy about it. Still, I wanted—needed—Clay to be on board. I’d need his support.
He spun to face me. “Happy?” His breathing sped and a grin stretched across his mouth. “I’m over the fucking moon. I just . . . I can’t believe it. Wow. We’re going to have a little girl!”
His statement echoed my own assumption that we’d have a girl. After all, the sunbird passed through the female line. He didn’t stop grinning as he raced back to the bed and kissed me until I tumbled backward.
When my back hit the mattress, his hands were on my body. He lifted up my shirt and pressed a kiss just below my belly button.
“Hi, baby,” he whispered against my skin, drawing a giggle from me.
“I don’t think she can hear you yet.”
“I don’t care.” He pressed another kiss ag
ainst my stomach and then climbed my body. “I won’t let a day go by where she doesn’t know how special she is.”
I snorted. Special was right. She was going to be part-phoenix, part-human, and part-fae. Who knew what that meant? I certainly didn’t. In that moment, though, I didn’t care. Now that the anxiety over Clay’s reaction was gone, a burst of excitement raced through me. It was amazing, beautiful, and massively unexpected. My only hope was that our daughter would be healthy and happy.
Clay and I wore matching smiles as he lay down beside me and guided me to straddle his hips.
“I still can’t believe it,” he said.
“I know,” I whispered back as I placed my hands on either side of his face and brought his lips to mine.
While our lips were locked, Clay’s hands made short work of my blouse. When I sat up to catch my breath, his teeth found his bottom lip, and he pressed his hand over my pelvis. His gaze found mine and he grinned.
Wordlessly, I placed my hand over the top of his and grinned in response.
We’re going to have a baby!
“I love you, Evie,” he said as sat up to claim my lips.
We moved as one to shed our clothing and then found the same position again—wrapped tightly against one another while connected on every level. Our pace was slow and steady, barely moving but with every motion in perfect sync with each other.
Clay’s gaze shifted between my eyes and my stomach as he moved within me. After a moment, he wrapped his arms around me tighter than before and rested his head against my heart.
“I’m going to be a daddy,” he murmured, using words that I didn’t think were meant for me.
Something told me we were going to be celebrating long into the night.
CHAPTER SEVEN
“WE SHOULD GET married,” Clay said, propping himself up on his elbows. It was a little after midnight, and he hadn’t left the room to return to his duties yet. I figured Mackenzie must have let Fiona know that he’d likely be gone for the night because no one came searching for him.