by A. J. Downey
The weather abated and we rode until just after dark, I didn’t want to subject her to any more today which meant we stopped somewhere near Panama City in Florida, being that I cut into the panhandle to get us back into our home state sooner rather than later. We were about halfway to Bobby’s but I wanted to get her a shower, a change of clothes and a little rest before we took on more people. She looked like her rope was about ready to snap.
We hit a cheap motel, one of the big name ones that had locations all across the country. I tended to like them better when I was travelling solo, because they were cleaner and had higher standards. This time it was because I had higher standards too. I didn’t want to bring Faith into some fleabag place. She’d probably seen enough of them for twenty life times. I regretted having to bring her to a motel at all, but the need for rest and a shower outweighed the desire to press all the way on down to Bobby’s.
I doubted she had it in her to make the ride as much as I doubted she’d had any kind of restful sleep when she’d been locked up the night before. She stumbled with fatigue when she got off the bike and I’d had to reach out an arm to steady her. I got off myself, and we checked in, the chick behind the counter eying us suspiciously. She took both my driver’s license and Faith’s ID, which it was a good thing her sister Hope had had her passport; it’d made replacing Faith’s ID weeks back much easier.
She handed over her shiny, new, Florida identification and the clerk glanced between it and Faith several times until Faith tucked herself into my side from the scrutiny. Ironically, that seemed to satisfy the clerk and I realized that the scrutiny wasn’t likely what Faith had thought it to be. The well-meaning clerk had seen a fragile looking woman with the big bad biker and had leapt to the conclusion that she wasn’t with me of her free will. It’d happened to a few of the guys and their women before. We were just another casualty of citizen preconceived notions and judgment, until she’d taken shelter in my arms. It both filled me with resignation and elated me at the same time. A weird mix of emotions that I shoved into a footlocker and kicked aside.
I wanted to get my girl a shower, and some restful sleep. I made it a point to be extra polite to the motel’s clerk in an effort to speed things up and prove the bitch wrong in equal measure. She seemed unnerved by my smile, and by the quiet use of ‘Ma’am’ to address her and I was glad for it in a twisted kind of way. Any time you could kill that kind of negative with a positive was a good thing in my book. The world was a shitty enough place without adding more to the dung heap.
I put an arm around Faith’s shoulders when the clerk slid the key card across the counter at us. I took it and tipped my head, picked up my bags at our feet, and made a point to say thank you one more time before I steered Faith back out the glass doors. I steered my girl up the stairs to the right of us and down the long line of tightly shut doors to the one that would be ours. She was trembling lightly, and I had to imagine that motels and hotels in general weren’t the best place for her to be in light of recent events.
I made a strong mental note, that if I ever took her on the road or on a trip somewhere, that a bed and breakfast would be the way to go about lodging. There were plenty of ‘em in Ft. Royal which is what gave me the idea.
I shut the door firmly behind us and shot every lock and bolt available. Faith stood by the bed, staring at it, though her gaze was far away, someplace else. I sighed inwardly, and considered what to do, what to say to bring her back.
“Baby Girl,” I tried gently, and she startled.
She turned those beautiful aquamarine eyes up to mine and I lost whatever else I was going to say. Turns out I didn’t need to say anything. Those eyes of hers filled to the brim, silently, and she dove at me. I caught her, and she buried her face in my chest and the wave crested. Faith crashed onto my shore, the sobs shaking her, wracking her still too-thin frame and it turned out, she didn’t need any words. She just needed me to be there. She just needed to be held and to empty it all out, and that? That I could do.
Chapter 32
Faith
“Shhh, it’s okay, Baby Girl, it’s okay.”
He was always so gentle with me, and this was no exception. He held me close, fingers buried in my hair, massaging my neck at the base of my skull. I expelled my anxiety, sadness, fear, and anger in the form of tears and shuddering sobs against him and he simply held me fast and let me do it. He let me cry it all out and sooner rather than later the storm was past.
I looked up at him, into his kind and caring eyes while he slicked the moisture off my face with his thumbs. He searched my eyes and whatever it was they held and finally smiled. He looked as tired and drawn as I felt and I realized the depth of his worry, and how hard it had been for him while I’d been… away.
“I don’t know about you, but I could use a shower and some decent sleep. Can I interest you in both?” he asked gently and I nodded, too drained to speak.
“Okay,” he murmured and unzipped my leather vest for me. His blunt fingers were gentle as he divested each of us of clothing, one piece at a time. Always keeping us even, one piece from me, one piece him, back and forth until he was just in his boxers and I in my bra and panty set.
He led me gently by the hands into the small bathroom and started the shower, smiling gently, but also a little sadly, he asked me, “Do you want to shower alone?”
I shook my head. After yesterday, I wanted to be close to him, he made me feel safe like nothing and no other, and I craved that almost more than I had ever craved the drugs they’d put in me.
“Okay, Baby Girl, okay,” he murmured and drew my forehead to his lips. I collapsed my body into his arms, my hands resting against his chest, my ear over his heart. He was so warm, and the room was cool from the air conditioning unit. He let me go to start the shower and slipped out of his boxers before gently undoing the catch on my bra at the back. He let me hide against him, stepping into the tub before me so that he might steady me as I stepped in. As soon as he jerked the curtain closed he let me resume my hiding by tucking myself close into his body, though he turned me into the hot shower spray to keep me warm.
“No, let me,” he murmured when I reached for the little packet with the bar of soap in it. He picked it up and tore the plastic with his teeth, sliding the sliver of a bar into his big hands. He soaped them and ran them gently along my throat, across my chest and shoulders, down my arms until my fingertips grazed his palms. My eyes had drifted shut at his pleasurable touch and they opened to a sparkle of joy in his eyes, a mischievous little boy smile on his lips.
“I love that I can do that,” he said.
“What?”
“Make your eyes close; make you lose yourself a little…”
“Make me forget?” I asked, his smile grew into a pleased grin.
“Do I?” he asked.
“You know you do.”
“It’s still nice to hear it, Baby Girl, it’s still nice to hear it.”
He turned me so my front met the spray and massaged the soap into my shoulders and back. I very nearly melted beneath the soothing touches designed to ease my tension and fear. He was purely comforting and yet sensual without being overtly erotic. In short, he was being oh so careful of me and I both loved him for it and became extremely frustrated with myself over being so… broken.
I sighed under his gently prying fingers as he worked out the stiffness, kinks, and knots of the tension I very nearly always carried with me lately and found myself wanting for a deeper, more significant exchange between us. I turned, of my own volition this time, and kissed him fiercely, the rough stubble of his few days’ growth tickling my palms. He pulled me tight against his body, the water sluicing through my hair, slicking it back from our faces.
I sighed out, comfortably, happy, and safe and Marlin did everything right, right up until he stopped me from wrapping my fingers around his length.
“Easy, Faith. I don’t want that right now, not here anyways.”
His cock was hard and
hot where it was trapped between our bodies and I looked up at him, confused.
“Your body says otherwise,” I said and he chuckled.
“Yeah, well my dick has a mind of its own, and he likes to forget that I call the shots.”
I pursed my lips and breathed in, remembering my promise to communicate and to ask and answer… I took the leap, afraid of the possibility of rejection, “Why not?” I asked. His answer surprised me.
“When I make love to you again, it’s not going to be in some cheap, crappy, motel room, Faith. You get me?” he asked softly. I stared up at him, shocked by the vehemence of his tone. “You deserve better than this, and tonight isn’t about sex. Tonight is about me taking care of my woman after the shitty night you had last night and the even rougher day you had today. Tonight is about getting that place off of you and out of your hair, of holding you close and keeping you safe.”
Tihe shower was suddenly loud in the resounding silence that ensued, echoing off the tile walls in the small space we were in. I stared up at him, mute with shock, his hands kneading lightly up and down my back. I was glad for the water, disguising my tears. I didn’t want him to think I was sad or unhappy. It was quite the opposite, actually. I couldn’t ever remember a time I felt so happy. What I didn’t expect was the overwhelming sense of guilt that came with it.
All I could think was this man deserves so much better than me, and it broke my heart that I couldn’t provide him with that. That all I would ever be was this broken, sad, pathetic, hopeless thing. That he would eventually grow tired of me and my bullshit baggage.
I pulled myself close to him and he held me, and I took a little solace in the here and now. Shoving all that down and aside as a problem for another day. I knew I would have to face the music eventually, but for now… I could let myself have this for just a little while, couldn’t I?
Marlin took his time with me and I my time with him. We bathed each other, gentle and careful, kissing when the urge overtook us, but he remained steadfast that there would be no sex tonight, and though I found myself aroused, I was grateful for his fierce adherence to simple tender care for tonight. I didn’t think I could bear to have sex in a motel room. His perception was dead on in that case. I’d felt a creeping nausea when we’d first come through the door though it’d melted away beneath his touch and had, I think, gone somewhere down the shower drain.
When he’d turned off the water, it had begun to run cool, and coupled with the air conditioned ambient temperature of the room, I had begun to break out in goose flesh from the chill.
He dried me with equal consideration and care with which he’d washed me, wrapping me in a towel and holding out one of his clean tee shirts for me to slip into. It barely grazed the tops of my thighs below my panties, which he held out a clean pair of those for me to step into as well.
He quickly pulled on a pair of his boxers, adjusting himself with a slight grimace, which I don’t think he realized I caught. I felt bad for him, but he made no further outward signs of discomfort, nor would he let me do anything to assuage his frustration. Instead he kissed my forehead and gently steered me to the bed, turning out the lights before climbing in after me.
Marlin gathered me back, against his chest, wrapping me in his strong arms before burying his nose in my hair, behind my ear. A sweet, gentle, kiss he placed there before letting out a contented hum. I fell asleep far faster than I wanted to after that. So tired that I was very nearly out the moment my head touched the pillow.
Chapter 33
Marlin
I let Faith sleep late, hell, I slept late, too. I still woke up before her, but she was sound asleep and lying on my chest so sweetly, I wasn’t about to move her. Instead, I relaxed and simply enjoyed the sensation of her soft warmth against me. Her body was snug up against mine, in that way that was so trusting, so beautifully, innocently, sweet; that I could hardly believe my luck. I’d wanted this since forever, had almost had it a time or two, so I’d thought. Really only came close once. God, I loved her belief in me. It made me feel like a man in every way that counted. It made me want to fight hard and harder to be the man she believed me to be. I thought I’d done a pretty good job up to this point, but there was always room for improvement in anything a man did and taking care of his woman? Well that was no exception; so, I let her sleep.
I let her dream, and I smoothed my fingers through her hair while she did it. Didn’t seem like it was one of her bad ones and the good was few and far between for her, so why not? I lazed in bed and relaxed and neither one of us had stirred until the phone had gone off with the ‘get the fuck out’ disguised as a curtesy call. We’d dressed in fresh clothes, had geared up for the ride and had gone as far as the nearest Denny’s for breakfast before hitting the road again.
That’d been a little over five hours ago. We’d stopped once for fuel, and again a time or two for Faith or myself to use the restroom, and truth be told, I wasn’t exactly pushing us hard. It was hot, and I don’t care how much citizens thought the wind cooled a rider, you wear that much black leather in Florida heat and humidity, you started dyin’ in a big damn hurry. The stops to pee were just as much stops to hydrate and try to cool down as much as they were anything. I saw another long shower in our future when we got to Bobby’s; a cool one this time.
We pulled down the dirt lane leading through the orange grove and to his house, sometime around dusk. He heard the bike, and met us out on his wraparound porch. His country house was the real deal and had been in his family for something like four generations now. A bright, cheery yellow with white shutters and trim. It’d been in magazines a time or two when his parents had been in it, and his dad had been alive. His mom lived with her sister somewhere out near Tampa now. Bobby’s siblings had long taken off for other states. He’d been the only one to get his dad’s farming genes and loved this place like nobody’s business.
I pulled off to the side of the front steps leading up onto his porch while Tango, Bobby’s yellow Lab did his best imitation of bounding down to see us. Dog was so old, I was surprised he was still kickin’.
Faith got down, and I could tell she was road weary. Bobby caught it too, eying her carefully before setting his jaw in that way, arching an eyebrow in my direction, asking without words if it’d been a rough day. I turned down my mouth and cocked my head to the side to let him know that just about every day lately had been a rough one, but this one hadn’t been overly so. I took off my helmet and stood up, swinging my leg over the seat and groaning a bit. Sometimes I felt like I was getting too old for these long rides, today was one of those days.
“Jimmy,” Bobby greeted and we clasped forearms and pulled each other in for a hug and a slap on the back.
“Hey Bobby, thanks for taking us in on such short notice.”
“It’s not a problem, hi Faith,” he stuck out his hand, “I’m Bobby. We haven’t been formally intro’ed, but this here is my farm and you’re welcome to sleep inside the house while you’re here this time.”
Faith blushed to the roots of her hair and shook Bobby’s hand quickly before letting go and taking a half step back, both of her arms winding around one of mine in one of the most adorable displays of shyness I don’t think either Bobby or I could hardly stand it.
“Thank you,” she stammered awkwardly, “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” he smiled at her, his best most genuine good ‘ol boy smile that usually had the girls dropping their panties saying they wouldn’t be needin’ ‘em anymore. Instead, the smile earned him Faith tucking herself closer into my side. I smiled at that and Bobby grinned.
“Y’all hungry?” he asked and I nodded.
“Starved.”
“Well, c’mon in! I’ll get somethin’ goin’ on the grill out back.”
“Sounds good,” Faith said and smiled in an attempt to not seem rude. I’d filled Bobby in, and he didn’t pay no never mind to her being so shy. I’d told him it’d take a good long while for her to warm u
p to him, if she ever did.
We had dinner and beers, made some small talk, but Bobby could tell we were wore out and didn’t push it. Instead, he cleared plates and told us he was going to watch some TV before hitting the hay, and we were welcome to join him. Faith smiled wanly, and I declined for us before she had to.
“Right then, see y’all in the morning, then. Jimmy, you know where the guest room’s at. Make yourself at home.”
“You got it, Man. Thanks again.”
“No problem.”
Faith very nearly sagged with relief when I took her gently by the hand and led her upstairs. I took her down the hall to the bathroom and got the water running in the tub, stripping us down a piece at a time like the night before. I didn’t know about her, but I was up for a soak, and Bobby had these giant ass old fashioned copper tubs in the house. The kind that were deep, and big. The kind that they just didn’t make anymore, and apparently they were something Faith had never seen before because she couldn’t stop staring at it, as if it were too good to be real.
“Never seen a woman fall in love with a bathtub,” I said casually.
“What, am I looking at it the same way I look at you, or something?” I froze and looked up from where I was gathering her fitted tee in my hands to draw it over her head. I felt a slow, lazy grin overtake me, but I chose not to say anything. Instead, I undressed us and got into the tub, shutting off the tap. I held a hand out to Faith and she climbed in after me, situating herself in front of me, laying back against my chest carefully.
God, this must be what heaven is like.
My arms around her, she trailed fingertips beneath the warm water along my arm, and I had to smile to myself. Yeah, I was pretty sure this was heaven. I heaved a long sigh and I’m not sure why, but I sang to her; her song, Hope Never Dies.