Methods of Madness

by Ray Garton

  Over coffee, Dani had explained about the rollerskate and told April how terribly worried she and Richard were about their son. That was all she’d told her, all she’d needed to tell her. For now. If it was necessary later, she would come up with some explanation for this Dr. Kru… Dr. Krusa… whatever his name was.

  “He’ll be fine,” April assured her. “Kids bounce back fast, you know. You just watch. But you… you seem a little, you know, upset about something else.”

  Dani shrugged, heaving nonchalance from the gesture with constipated effort.

  “Richard and I had a fight. You know, just before… the accident.” Careful, she thought. Don’t tell one you can’t cover later. “I think it upset Jason. You know, made things worse.”

  “I’m telling you, don’t worry about Jason. He’ll be fine. Kids’re tough. Like Timex watches. Remember last year when my little Kenny fell off the monkey bars and broke his ankle? He hardly noticed it. Even enjoyed it, I think. All the attention, you know? They’re like TV evangelists, kids,” she giggled. “They keep coming back for more. Wish I had a little of what they’ve got in ‘em.”

  April pulled into the hospital parking lot and stopped in front of Dani’s car.

  “How about I park and go up with you?” April suggested.

  “Oh, no, hon, that’s okay. I know you’re busy.”

  “Busy? Hell, I’m bathing the dogs today, f’Christ’s sake. Ill park the—”

  “No, no. I can’t stay anyway. I’ve gotta go pick up his school-work.”

  “Oh. All right,” she conceded. “See you later today? Got some wine coolers in the ‘fridge.”

  “This afternoon. Thanks for the ride.”

  Dani smiled until April’s station wagon was out of the parking lot, then she leaned against her car and sighed, looking up at the gray hospital building.

  She couldn’t go up and see Jason. Not yet. She wasn’t ready.

  Dani could not get out of the parking lot fast enough.

  5.

  Jason was groggy, but not too groggy to laugh. He was propped up in bed, the new cast on his arm resting in his lap as he watched a Donald Duck cartoon on the Disney Channel. He’d never seen the Disney Channel before and was nearly happy enough to jump out of bed when he learned the television in his room had cable.

  Dr. Saunders had said his arm wasn’t as bad as they’d thought and would probably heal nicely. He’d told Jason to rest in bed until his mom came to get him.

  Jason didn’t want to think about that. He hoped she was late.

  Ramona, his nurse, a squat woman with big smiling eyes and a musical voice, bustled into the room; she held a styrofoam cup with a straw sticking through the lid.

  “Here you go, sweetie pie,” she said, handing it to him. “Chocolate, just like you asked.”

  “Thank you, Ramona.”

  “Not supposed to have milkshakes this soon after breakfast, but I smuggled it outta the kitchen for you.”

  Jason was laughing at the cartoons again.

  “You gotta roommate coming in a coupla hours. But your momma’ll probably be here by then, I’m sure. Bet you can’t wait to get outta here, huh?”

  Jason’s laughter crumbled as she fluffed his pillows. He sipped his shake, frowning, and whispered, “I can wait.”

  6.

  The fourth grade class at Millhouse Elementary School was at recess when Dani arrived and the teacher, Miss Carmody, greeted her on the playground.

  Miss Carmody was a tall, svelte woman with a pleasant face but a timid, breathy voice. She clicked her tongue sympathetically as Dani told her of Jason’s accident.

  “We’ll have to work on that boy’s coordination,” she said good naturedly, walking to the classroom. “He seems to fall a lot.”

  Inside, Miss Carmody gathered up the week’s remaining assignments, put them in a folder, and gave them to Dani.

  “You can take this, too,” she said, going to a long table in the rear of the classroom. On the table were several stacks of large rectangular sheets of heavy duty paper; they were rumpled from dried watercolors. Miss Carmody lifted a sheet with a red ribbon taped to the cover and held it before her. “Too bad you missed last night’s art show,” she said. “Jason won second prize.”

  Dani clung to her smile as if for life as she stared at her son’s painting. Acid began to sizzle in her stomach.

  She knew, suddenly, why Jason had kept the art show a secret.

  Miss Carmody said hesitantly, “He’s very… imaginative. Don’t you think?”

  “Oh… yes. He is. Imaginative.”

  “You know, some of the other faculty members found this very interesting.”

  “Yes. Interesting.” Dani stepped forward and took the painting, clumsily rolling it up on the table.

  Miss Carmody joined her hands before her, fingers fluttering like moths. “We thought there might be… well, some… significance to Jason’s painting. We thought maybe you’d—”

  “I have to go to the hospital now, Miss Carmody. Thanks for your help.” She started for the door, dropped the folder, and papers hissed over the floor.

  Miss Carmody hunkered down beside her to help gather them up and said quietly, nervously, “If you ever need to, Mrs. Campbell, you can come talk to me. Or the school counselor. He’s—”

  “Thanks again.”

  In the car, Dani wrung her fists around the steering wheel until she caught her breath, then she unrolled the painting again.

  It was very good, bright with colors, even dark with shadows in most of the right places.

  A pretty green long-necked bottle stood in the center of the picture with fire and smoke bursting from the top. Peering from the flames were two hideous, monstrous faces. On the left, a scaled reptilian face glared with fiery eyes, a gaping mouth lined with needle-like fangs, and, on the top, a tuft of wavey curly brown hair. The fangs dripped with red-black blood. The other face seemed softer, somewhat feminine, more human, with gold worms coming from the head instead of hair. A big black padlock pierced the thin lips, locking the mouth shut and, worst of all, the creature had no eyes.

  Written at the bottom in red pencil was: THE MONSTERS FROM THE BOTTLE.

  Dani almost tore it up into small pieces. She knew she’d have to sometime because if Richard ever saw it, he would… he would…

  She didn’t want to think about it.

  She wanted a drink.

  Dani rolled the picture back up, started the car, and drove away.

  7.

  Dani stopped a few feet away from the open door of Jason’s hospital room when she heard an unfamiliar sound. She stood in the busy corridor and listened, took a cautious step forward and craned her neck to peer into the room.

  At first, she thought he was in pain, then thought perhaps he was crying because he’d been left alone in a hospital.

  She was wrong.

  Jason was laughing.

  Dani started into the room but spun around when someone touched her shoulder. She looked into the stern face of Dr. Saunders.

  “Dr. Krusadian will call you at two this afternoon,” he whispered. “Don’t let me hear you weren’t there. Understood?”

  He went into the room ahead of her.

  “Well, Jason,” he said, smiling, “ready to go home?”

  Jason turned his smiling eyes from the television.

  “Your mom’s here.”

  When he looked at Dani, Jason’s smile disappeared as if it had never been. His eyelids dropped half way and his brow creased slightly.

  “Yeah,” he said in a low monotone. “I’m ready.”

  Once again, he was the Jason Dani knew.

  8.

  They drove home in complete silence.

  Jason usually spoke little anyway, but his silence in the car was a nervous one, cautious. He kept eyeing the rolled up painting on the seat between them.

  When they got home, Dani said, “Your teacher gave me this,” handing him the painting as she sat down on the sofa
. “Jason, is there anything… well, would you like to talk about this picture?”

  He stared at his cast silently, reading some of the nurses’ inscriptions. Finally, without lifting his eyes, Jason shook his head.

  “It’s… well, you know, it’s good, but—”

  “Thank you.”

  “Um, look, Jason, there’ll be a man coming here tonight. A doctor. He’s coming here to… to talk with us.”

  “Is he gonna talk about my arm?”

  “Well, sort of. See, this doctor might be able to fix it so… so your dad… doesn’t get so mad… you know, like he does? He’s… I don’t know, he’s just gonna talk to us, that’s all. To your dad and me. I think he might want to talk to you, too, okay?”

  He nodded.

  She looked at him for a while, waiting for him to look at her, just lift his head, anything. But he didn’t. Dani touched his chin with a forefinger and he raised his head first, then, a moment later, his eyes, and looked at her.

  “You’re… you’re so pale,” she whispered. “You wanna go to bed, sweetheart?”

  He nodded again.

  “I’ll bring you a bunch of pillows. And how about a popsicle?”

  Another nod as he started up the stairs, holding the rolled up painting.

  “Um, Jason? Um, your painting… well, just for now, could you, um, you know… “

  “I’ll put it away,” he said without looking back.

  Before getting the pillows and popsicle for Jason, Dani went to the car for the groceries she’d bought earlier. She took them to the kitchen and opened the day’s first bottle of wine.

  It was one of her last.

  9.

  The phone rang at exactly two o’clock that afternoon. Dani’s hand trembled as she reached for the receiver; her other hand was wrapped around a glass of wine.

  “Hello?”

  “Mrs. Campbell? Dr. Krusadian calling.”

  His voice was deep as an arthritic ache and curled by an accent of some kind. Jamaican, perhaps, but she wasn’t sure. He was definitely black.

  “Um, yes, this is Dani Campbell.”

  “Good. I’m calling about this evening. I will be there at seven. I wanted you to know so I wouldn’t interrupt your supper. I’m very prompt.”

  “Well, Doctor, I appreciate that, but… well, it would be much easier if we could come to your office.”

  “I don’t have an office.”

  In the dead silence that followed, Dani wondered about Dr. Krusadian.

  “I see,” she said. “Well, if you don’t mind my asking… if you don’t have an office, what kind of doctor are you? Exactly?”

  “A very good one, Mrs. Campbell. I’m calling to verify your address.”

  After he recited their address succinctly, Dani said, “That’s right. Do you know where that is?”

  “Exactly. Seven o’clock. Good afternoon.”

  He hung up.

  10.

  Richard didn’t say a word when he came in from work that evening. By that time, rain had begun to fall outside and, occasionally, thunder rolled in the distance. Dani had gotten to the bottom of a large cheap bottle of chenin blanc and was relaxed on the sofa watching M*A*S*H when he arrived. She’d managed to stack the newspapers by the fireplace and do the laundry, but she hadn’t quite made it into the back yard for firewood.

  After changing his clothes, Richard opened a bottle of wine, got a glass, and sat in front of the television to drink and read the paper during the commercials. He did just that for a long time without saying a thing or even acknowledging Dani’s presence.

  When she could take the silence no longer, Dani said, “Dr. Krusadian’s going to be here at seven.” “Mm-hm.”

  “Do you think he’ll want to talk to Jason, too?”

  Richard made a little humming sound, like saying I don’t know without bothering to open his mouth.

  “Richard?”

  “Hm?”

  “You… you’re making noises. Why won’t you talk to me? What have I done?”

  “Nothing. Just don’t feel like talking. Been talking all day. We’ll do plenty of talking later, probably. When he comes. He say how much this is gonna cost me?”

  “No,” she sighed. “He didn’t say.”

  “Probably plenty. What’s for dinner?” He didn’t look up from the paper.

  “Soup and sandwiches. Is that all you can think about? How much it’s gonna cost? I mean… Richard, I’m scared.”

  “So’m I. I just don’t want to talk about it.”

  They didn’t.

  11.

  The ringing of the doorbell mingled with a growl of thunder.

  Richard seemed not to notice; he was still reading the paper.

  Dani leaned forward and ran a hand over her hair, patting. She took one more drink of wine and her hand froze with the glass half way back to the coffee table.

  My God, she thought, we’re drinking. He’s here and… how much wine have we had?

  There were two bottles on the floor beside Richard’s chair. Empty.

  “Richard, put those bottles away. Please?”

  “Why? I’m not drunk. I have nothing to hide. S’only wine, for Christ’s sake. Answer the door.”

  Dani walked through ankle-deep mud to get to the door. It sucked at her feet, making each step an ordeal as the doorbell rang again. She looked down, actually expecting to see the mud, but there was only carpet. She stood with her hand on the doorknob for a moment, took a deep breath, and pulled the door open.

  Dr. Krusadian filled the doorway. Only a small amount of light from the porchlight squeezed past him over his shoulders. Below that, there was only Dr. Krusadian in the doorway from side to side, all the way down to the threshold.

  He wore a black raincoat, open in front. Beneath that, a black suit, narrow black tie, white shirt, and, on his head, a black fedora tilted forward slightly.

  His face was as black as his clothing, coal black, so black it was like looking into a night sky that held only two glittering stars: his eyes.

  Dr. Krusadian smiled; his lips pulled back to reveal a bit of their chocolate brown and pink undersides and two rows of enormous pure white teeth.

  “Hello, Mrs. Campbell. I am Dr. Krusadian.”

  Dani realized she was nibbling on a knuckle nervously and dropped her hand suddenly.

  The thick meaty fingers of his left hand were wrapped around the handle of a black bag, a doctor’s bag, just like in the movies. His right hand held what looked like an overnight bag.

  Dani covered her mouth to hold in a nervous giggle; it surprised her, bubbling up from her chest like an unexpected belch.

  “My goodness,” she said, “it looks like you’re moving in.”

  He was still smiling as he said, “Only for the night.”

  Dr. Krusadian moved forward, turning his bulk slightly and easing through the doorway shoulder first.

  Horrified by the thought of being in his way, Dani stumbled backward, gasping so suddenly she choked and coughed.

  Dr. Krusadian put his bags down, took off his coat and hat and handed them to her, then closed the door behind him.

  And locked it.

  Without taking her eyes from him, Dani draped his coat over a chair and put down his hat.

  “And where is Mr. Campbell this evening?”

  Dani stammered before she finally got her reply out of her mouth; she was suddenly very, very uncomfortable.

  “He’s in the living room.”

  “Well, why don’t we join him.” He gave a little half-bow as he picked up his bags and said, “After you.”

  She was reluctant to turn her back on him but walked quickly and didn’t stop until she was standing beside Richard’s recliner.

  Richard folded up the paper and started to stand but froze with hands on the armrests, elbows jutting and shoulders hunched, frowning at the doctor’s suitcase. He muttered, “What… what’re you… “

  “Mr. Campbell? I am Dr. Krusadian.”
He put his bags down again, filling the room with his smile. “I’ve come to help.”

  12.

  Dr. Krusadian lifted his cup of cafe mocha from the kitchen table to his lips, which were waiting, stuck out and puckered, as if he were about to whistle. He sipped carefully, loudly, eyes closed and sausage pinky delicately cocked.

  Richard stood by the refrigerator, hands in the back pockets of his jeans, gawking at Krusadian as if the man had just come up through the floor.

  When Richard realized earlier that Krusadian was planning to stay the night, he’d begun to show signs of smoldering anger that had set off alarms in Dani’s head. She’d quickly suggested they go to the kitchen for coffee, hoping to hold Richard’s anger back a while longer.

  Now Richard was setting off her alarms again by the way he looked at Krusadian. He stepped forward and leaned against the table.

  “Look,” he said, “if you don’t mind my asking, I’d like to know—”

  “Many things, I’m sure, Mr. Campbell. But first, why don’t you sit down and let me explain what we’ll be doing together and perhaps that would answer some of your questions.”

  Dr. Krusadian’s voice was creamy, rich, and his accent covered his words like a dark chocolate coating.

  Dani stood by the counter watching both men. Richard didn’t move and Dr. Krusadian rolled his eyes slowly upward to him.

  “Sit down,” he said, his big lips moving slowly around the two words and coming to rest in an expression that was almost, but not quite, congenial.

  Dani and Richard each took a seat at the table.

  Dr. Krusadian’s cup disappeared between his mit-like hands as he began, his words accompanied by distant thunder and rain on the windows.

  “You have a problem. Both of you. All of you. Three people with one single problem. I am here to help you deal with it. I am here to help all three of you, but my foremost reason for coming is Jason. I will focus on your son. Through working with him, a solution will most likely… reveal itself. That has been my experience.”