“This now brings us to Ricky. His background was similar to Illea’s, although not nearly as horrific. His mother was an extreme alcoholic who abused him sexually and emotionally, although not physically. She was a sad woman and a mean drunk who dominated him completely. Her abusiveness, though, was more a result of her own mental illness and addictions than of the real evil that possessed Illea’s stepfather. But abuse is abuse, regardless of the reasons why and so, in selfish unawareness, she destroyed Ricky’s spirit in a very systematic way with her advances and extremely inconsistent behavior. Alternately, she would love him to the point of doting and then, without warning or cause, hate him to the point of despising him. He never knew where he stood with her.
“After her death, he tried to lead a normal life, but he always chose women that displayed the same patterns as his mother. It always ended badly. After a long string of short yet catastrophic relationships, he became depressed to the point of suicide and tried to kill himself with a bizarre cocktail of cheap booze, prescription drugs and chemical inhalants. The botched suicide attempt left him with permanent nerve and brain damage and he was never the same again. He became extremely paranoid and paralyzed by a host of phobias, primarily concerning women. Whereas before, his mother’s behavior and his dismal relationships had left him distrusting of women, he was now struck with horror at the very idea of allowing any woman to touch him or even to be near him, for in his madness, he was absolutely convinced and terrified that all women wished to devour him alive.
“Because of this fear, Illea was not allowed to meet Ricky until after the transformation ceremony. But once that was over and his heart and spirit were healed, the two were introduced and bonded immediately. I was so happy for Illea, because it became a union made in heaven. It’s is an odd thing, one I cannot help but notice, but it seems that those of us with similar afflictions in our first lives are those that have bonded the most strongly in this one.”
It was then that our conversation was interrupted. Three naked women clutching towels, dark hair still wet, ran laughing up the steps and onto the porch in front of us.
“Hey girls, nice swim?” Ben asked them.
“Oh, yes,” said the first.
“Very nice,” added the second.
“Most lovely,” finished the third.
“Turning in already?” he said.
“Just to play,” they said in unison.
“Well, have fun, then,” Ben added.
They giggled coquettishly and scampered off into the house.
“What’s the story with those three, Ben?” I asked. “I can’t figure them out. I mean, they’re just so strange.”
“The Three Sisters?” he laughed gently. “They’re harmless. They’ve only been here a little over two months. They are a bit odd, it’s true, but you’ll get used to them.”
“Sisters,” I mused aloud. “That has got to be the strangest, most warped nickname for that trio. Considering the way they interact, honestly, I think that’s the very last moniker that would ever have come to my mind.”
“It does make sense when you consider that we have Geoffrey to thank for that nickname.”
“It figures.”
“Well,” Ben explained. “The name just kind of stuck because those three do tend to operate as a unit. To be honest, I think it’s the only way they can function. I doubt they’d fare well at all if they were ever separated, so I just try to be as patient with them as I can be.”
“I admire that, Ben, I really do. I’d like to be able to follow your lead, but I can’t help it; they just strike me as being a little too odd.”
Ben smiled. “They’re nice girls, really, but you’re right, they can be quite strange.”
“Well, at least they’re totally gorgeous, so I’m sure that helps them get away with lots of things. Especially with men.”
“In the outside world, that’s very, very true. But here at the mansion, they’re just a part of the family.”
“I have a question.”
“Go ahead, shoot.”
“If they aren’t real sisters, then why do they have such a striking family resemblance to one another?”
“Ah, now, that’s easy to explain. When Arrosha first found them, they asked her to make them look as if they belonged together, because as far back as they can remember, they’ve always thought of themselves as family. Combine that resemblance with the fact that they tend to operate as a single unit and now you can understand why the nickname caught on.”
“Why do they do that?” I asked.
“Do what?”
“Operate together as a single unit?”
“To be honest,” he answered, “I really don’t know. I once asked Arrosha about it and she said that she had her reasons for linking them together. She told me not to worry, that when the time was right, they would be ready to be separated and then she would restore them to wholeness as individuals. I’ve accepted that and have tried to treat the girls with as much patience and kindness as possible.
“What I can tell you is that their arrival at the mansion marked the very first multiple addition to our group. Their transformation ceremony was a first as well, since Arrosha held only one ceremony for the three of them. From the beginning, they’ve functioned almost as a single entity, their bond so strong that I often suspect that the deepest desire of each of them is to become one with the other two.
“In contrast, their interactions with other people are incredibly superficial and generally sexual in nature. The only other person that they’ve bonded with at all is Geoffrey and they quite adore him.”
“I still don’t get it.” I said. “Out of all the guys here, he’s the very last one I would have picked.”
Ben smiled. “I keep telling you that there’s more to Geoffrey than he’s thrown your way. He has an unusual patience with the Sisters. Do you remember that I told you that shared afflictions in our first lives seem to result in the formation of strong bonds in this one?”
“Yes.”
“Before coming to us, the Sisters each had a very heavy drug habit. It was forced upon them by their captors, against their wills, in order to make them easy to control. The only other former drug addict in our entire group was Geoffrey, although in his addiction was entirely of his own volition. I think that might be the shared affliction that’s created such a unique bond between him and the Sisters. He’s the only one outside of themselves that they allow in at all. He’s also the only one that’s ever been able to have any kind of a real conversation with them.”
“I saw Robert conversing with them at the hot tub earlier.”
“Robert enjoys telling them stories. He has quite a talent for it and the Sisters love to hear his tales. They’re very much like children in that respect. No, trust me, Geoffrey is the only one that they have ever confided in.”
“I never would have picked Geoffrey to be the one to confide in.”
“But they have, and were it not for what Arrosha and Geoffrey have told me, I would know nothing about the Sisters at all. And the more I come to know about their first lives, the more I can understand why Arrosha didn’t want to split them up.”
“So what was their story?” I asked, hoping that if I knew, I could deal with their oddness a little better.
“I know only the bare bones of their background, that they’re originally from a former Soviet block country, were kidnaped in childhood and sold to a group of very rich, very horrible men for purposes of prostitution and white slavery. They don’t think they even knew each other before the kidnapping, but they don’t seem to remember much prior to that time. They don’t even remember their real families, if indeed they ever had family to begin with. As far as they know, they may have been orphans. For all intents and purposes, the three of them are the only family that they had before Arrosha rescued them.
“They claim to have survived their first life only by always doing as they were told and by clinging tightly to each other for emotional support
. As a result, the strength of the bond between those three women is like iron. They are inseparable and regardless of whatever comes to pass, even after Arrosha restores their individuality, I’m sure they will always be together forever.”
“Well, I feel terrible now about being so judgmental about them,” I told him. “I didn’t mean to be, it’s just that they kind of scared me.”
“It’s okay,” he said, his easy smile returning. “You didn’t know and like I said, they really do take some getting used to. But tell me, Ashley, now that you know all of our deepest, darkest secrets, do you think you might still be willing to remain with us?”
“I’d be even more likely to, Ben. Thanks for putting a human face on the group. Now that I know everybody’s story, I feel a lot less like a troll walking among supermodels.”
“Oh, silly. You don’t look trollish at all,” he said, his easy laugh returning. “You never did. Besides, you are going to be so very beautiful, so very soon. All it takes is the transformation ceremony and it’s a done deal.”
“That’s very tempting, Ben, it really is. But to be honest, nothing at this point could mean more to me than getting my memories back.”
“For that, I have high hopes, sunshine. Very high hopes indeed.”
“What makes you so hopeful?” I asked.
“Just the eternal optimist in me, I suppose,” was his answer. “I don’t know, Ashley, I can’t speak for everyone, but personally, I’ve been feeling a little sharper lately and more creative and spiritual than usual. I’ve noticed that I’ve become more patient with other people, too, of late, something Geoffrey has certainly put to the test these days. I’m only telling you this to keep in mind in case you start getting too frustrated with the amnesia. Maybe it’ll help.
“You know, Ashley, I never cease to be amazed at how good Arrosha is to us. Just when I thought I’d seen all of the gifts that she had to give us, she surprises me with more. I can’t help but feel that my new awareness is a result of her getting us ready for something really big. It’s my hope that she’s getting us ready to go public, because I’m finally ready to rejoin the world; and this time, I want to make a real contribution out there.”
I waited for Ben to continue, but instead he became quiet, once again lost in his thoughts. As we rocked back and forth in the swing, I became mindful again of my surroundings. The long afternoon had passed, and the day was coming to an end. The few clouds in the sky had become purple streaks contrasting against the oranges, reds and pinks of a setting sun in full bloom. I looked over and studied Ben as he peacefully watched the sunset. I couldn’t help but marvel at how exquisite he was. His skin was beautifully tanned, his hair and eyes so dark a brown that they were almost, but not quite, black. However, instead of looking beady as sometimes happens when the irises are so dark, his eyes were large, kind and serene, deep pools of warmth and intelligence. His mouth had great wit to its shape and set, his lips were full and soft. As he settled back in the swing to get more comfortable, the muscles of his perfect, tanned body rippled beneath the ethereal fabric of his robe. He was as impossibly beautiful as the others, but he was completely unselfconscious about it and not the least bit vain. Rather than a model, Ben reminded me more of a romantic Hollywood leading man. Incredibly manly, he was the epitome of the kind of man so many people, straight or gay, dreamed of meeting, the kind of man that could make both men and women swoon. If all the beautiful people in this group were photographed together for a high-end fashion ad, his strength of character would cause his image to be the one to command the photograph. Ben’s intelligence, humor and humanity made his beauty seem even more intense and yet at the same time more approachable. I hadn’t known him long, and yet I knew that he was a very good person, and I was certain it was destined for us to become the very best of friends for life.
“And what about yourself? What’s your story?” I asked. “Who were you before you got here? Yesterday, you said that you were nearing the century mark, but that’s about all I know about your first life. Can you tell me your story? I’d really like to hear it now.”
Ben smiled sadly and looked down at his hands. Despite his apparent youth, for the first time something in his expression seemed very old indeed.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
“You know, it’s funny,” Ben began. “Swapping stories every time somebody new joins us is so common that you’d think I’d be used to talking about myself by now. But it’s always been so easy for me before to gloss over the parts of my past that I didn’t want to remember and leave out the things I didn’t care to admit. It’s been a very long time since I’ve done any real introspection concerning my first life. There wasn’t any reason, because it seemed like such a moot point. I’m a very different person now than I was back then, so nothing of that past life seems to apply to me any more. Besides, until today, it was never really necessary.
“But then you came along. I have to say that your orientation is proving to be a bit of a challenge, and an entirely new experience for me. As I told you before, no one has ever just popped up in our world so unexpectedly, the way you did. I’ve had to explain so much more to you than I’ve ever had to explain to anyone else because you arrived so totally unprepared. It’s something that’s never happened before. Every fledging that’s ever gone before you was ready to join our group before ever setting foot one at this mansion. They’ve always been fresh from just having met Arrosha personally and after that experience, they believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that Arrosha is the true Goddess. They accept without question the awesome magnitude of her powers and benevolence.
“Before you arrived, I’ve never had to explain to a newcomer why we believe in Arrosha, how much she means to us and how much we trust in her. I’ve also never had to persuade anyone about the blessing of the transformation ceremony. It’s always just been taken for granted. But you’re so very different. For some odd reason, this time it seems that Arrosha wants you to become a part of our group more than you actually do. While I’ve done the best I could, I still don’t know exactly how to handle your situation. To tell the truth, I’ve just been starting with Arrosha’s instructions and then winging it from there. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed introducing you to our lifestyle, and taking you around has been a lot of fun. I just don’t know how good of a job I’m doing, because I’ve never had to convince anyone before that joining us was a good idea.
“Oh, well, enough procrastination. It’s time to get real, time to tell my story. Originally, I was just going to give you my standard song-and-dance routine, and tell you the bare bones of who I was without having to delve into my first life too deeply; but I can’t very well do that now, can I? I mean, I’ve been so candid about the lives of my companions, especially about Illea, that I’d feel like an absolute hypocrite if I were not equally as candid about my own.”
“Ben, that’s alright,” I reassured him. “If it makes you feel uncomfortable, you can just give me the standard fare. I don’t mind.”
“No, that’s okay. Since you weren’t transformed and since you haven’t actually met her yet, I feel like I’d be shortchanging Arrosha if I took the easy way out. In order to understand her better, you need to realize the enormity of the blessings she has given us all, the true extent of what she has to offer you. It goes beyond just looking pretty or feeling more confident, beyond the toys and perks. I’d like you to know what it feels like to be a dying schlep one minute and on top of the world the next. That’s something I can do in depth only with my own story. I owe Arrosha no less.”
I was beginning to feel awkward, as if my mere presence was forcing Ben to face a past that he had avoided as long as he possibly could. I didn’t know what to say, so I sat quietly and waited for him to continue.
“No,” he continued after a few moments of reflection. “The discomfort of renewed self-examination is no excuse for me to shirk my duty to Arrosha. Besides, maybe it’s time for me to stop denying my former self. I never liked him very
much and it’s time for me to begin making peace with him. Besides, my story is intertwined with Geoffrey’s. Despite his recent naughtiness, I’d like you to understand how far he’s come since the old days. I don’t know why I feel like I need to keep explaining him to you, but I guess the truth is that, when all is said and done, I really do want you to like him.”
“Listen, Ben,” I said. “Don’t feel compelled to tell me everything. Please feel free to leave out all the bad parts.” He was so uncomfortable I felt bound once again to give him an “out”. “I mean, if your story’s anywhere near as awful as some of the others, I can certainly understand your not wanting to tell it.”
“Oh, no, it’s not even close,” he protested. “Not at all. I came from a very good family, one which, despite being extremely conservative and strict, loved me deeply. My personal hell was strictly emotional, a result more of the restrictive society in which I lived than anything else. You see, Ashley, had been a braver man, I could have done a better job of life and lived more freely in spite of the narrow-minded constraints of the time. But that would have taken courage, and courage was a quality that was never in my makeup. I was just a nobody back then, a meaningless schlep who lived a long life with almost nothing to show for it. I was only a cog in a wheel and nothing more.”
“I can’t believe that, Ben. I’ve known you only a short time and you’re one of the most remarkable people I’ve ever met.”
“You didn’t know me in my first life. I was a very different man then, before Arrosha rescued and healed me. You see, she saved me by plucking me from the very brink of death. Out of everyone here, I was the most responsible for the pain in my own life because of what I was. I was a homely, dull little man whose cowardice, whose complete lack of courage, was directly, although not solely by any means, responsible for the overwhelming loneliness and heartache that I lived with day after day.
The Nightmare Game Page 40