Fail Up

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by Tavis Smiley


  Consequently, Bruce, even with his infinite authority, could not make the woman in his life love him for life.

  She alone has the power to choose love. Or not.

  That’s heavy. The underlying message: You can’t fade free will. We have all been granted the divine privilege to choose our destinies.

  But our gifts don’t end with free will. We also have the benefit of claiming our blessings. It’s not about how educated, connected, popular, wealthy, or attractive you may be—God grants grace and mercy to all. You can’t buy it, steal it, or sell it. You can, however, put yourself in the position to receive it, but you can’t earn it. He chooses who will be extended grace and mercy. It is an unmerited favor.

  I wrote earlier about the advice Mayor Tom Bradley gave me—“all things being equal,” the person who looks the best will win out. Although I understand the societal implication of his advice, thankfully there is no “all things being equal” clause when it comes to God’s grace and mercy. The fact is, even when things aren’t equal, if it’s meant for you to receive God’s grace, you’re going to get it. The world can’t give it, and the world can’t take it away. I know because I’ve been the recipient of countless blessings that I didn’t deserve or earn.

  Talk about meritocracy; grace is the ultimate example. It is gifted to all.

  Now, as the Parable of the Talents demonstrates, you can give your talent away or let it go to waste, but no one can take from you what God has for you.

  Success in some ways is what each of us determines it to be. To me, success is the rock-solid knowledge that your gifts are in motion, that you are an engaged, activated, and organic part of God’s universal plan.

  Concentrate on You

  In the movie, Bruce, as God, has to sift through millions of prayers and is burdened with the responsibility of deciding who receives blessings and who’s left out.

  In real life, a lot of us feel left out or denied. It doesn’t seem fair. Especially when we see certain folk who appear to be advancing beyond us economically, socially, or culturally who we believe can’t possibly be walking in the favor of God.

  Well, I can tell you two things. One, I feel you. I too have looked at God a little funny at times and said, “You can’t be serious! Him? Her? Oh, c’mon, Lord!” And yet, two, I know and accept that “God reigns over the just as well as the unjust.” In other words, some folk act a fool and God still bestows grace upon them, too. Remember, grace is an unmerited favor.

  So, what to do? Here’s where we cue Jeffrey Osborne and a group called LTD: “Concentrate on You.” When you’re busy concentrating on you and making your own creations in the world, you have less time to be distracted by what other folks are doing or saying.

  Each morning I revitalize and reenergize my soul with this sustaining prayer, courtesy of my dear friend, Dr. Gardner C. Taylor:

  “Lord, when the evening comes and the night falls, let me be able to look back on this day and find something I have done which I can present to you, that might not make me feel so ashamed.”

  Every time I pray this prayer, I get reminded of who I am and whom I’m trying to please. When it looks like other folks are advancing ahead of me; when it looks like others are blessed instead of me; when nothing seems to be going right and the world seems cruel and upside down—I concentrate on me. And I recommit myself to doing the best I can, with what I have, right where I am. This, I believe, is all that is required of us.

  Something Bigger

  The decay of our civilization and the devolution of our culture are constant concerns for me. Yet in the midst of all the madness, there are signs, small signals that we are perhaps evolving in the right direction. Some people do understand that power is not the path to peace, and money is an artificial substitute for happiness. Some people do understand the difference between success and greatness. Said Dr. King, “Everybody can be great because anybody can serve … You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.”

  It’s not always easy, but I choose to look for the light in this world full of darkness. Most often, against myriad obstacles, this light is being shined by everyday people. But sometimes, even by the rich and the lucky, too.

  The “Giving Pledge”—the brainchild of Bill Gates and Warren Buffett that so far has received commitments from 40 billionaires to donate half their fortunes to charity—is an encouraging sign. The movement has so many potential benefits. It may persuade other wealthy individuals to utilize their wealth in holistic ways to promote the power of philanthropy.

  I adhere to the Biblical edict that “to whom much is given, much is required.” I have been blessed beyond measure in my life. Trying to give back is reciprocity for my many blessings. It’s the rent I pay for the space that I occupy. I’m convinced abundant blessings will continue as long as I strive to bless others.

  I pride myself on my discipline and being in tune with myself. I’m not a vacillator, nor do I waffle; I know what I believe in and what I want. But there have been times when I really didn’t know which way was up or which way to go. That’s why having my relationship with God is so vitally important.

  I just don’t know how people navigate through life without having somebody or something that they can believe in or call upon in those moments when they’re stuck. When friends and family have abandoned them. When everybody has turned against them. When plans go so terribly awry. When there’s no place to turn. When we fail and fall flat on our faces; what gets us through?

  There was no clearer answer than the story of 33 Chilean miners trapped some 2,000 feet underground for nearly ten weeks. For 17 days, no one knew if they were dead or alive. Once found, the world watched with bated breath as intricate plans were made to lift the men from dangerously fragile surroundings. Finally, on Wednesday, October 13, 2010, the miracle survivors were lifted from the San Jose mine. One by one, each testified to the powerful force that cradled them throughout the ordeal:

  “I held on to God’s hand. At no point in time did I doubt that God would get me out of there,” said Mario Sepulveda, 40, the second miner lifted to safety.

  Jimmy Sanchez, 19, felt a need to correct those who insisted 33 souls were trapped beneath the earth: “There are actually 34 of us because God has never left us down here,” Sanchez said.

  Miner José Ojeda had a hard time explaining his feelings. There was no doubt in his mind that God had sustained them for a reason; he just wasn’t sure what that reason is … yet.

  “Here we have different faiths, all brothers in God … If God allows us to live, it is because of something he has prepared for us when we come out.”

  I love Ojeda’s acceptance of the unknown. There’s no need to sweat the whys or the wherefores. He understands. It’s the score of a song I adore, “I Understand,” performed by Smokie Norful. He does understand. We can trust His plan even when we can’t hear His voice.

  Now that’s blessed assurance!

  All I know is that I could not have survived 20 years in this chaotic, fleeting, ever-changing world of mass communications without something bigger than me to sustain and guide me.

  I have not arrived at this blessed place with a contented sense of contribution and peace of mind because I’m the smartest, the most talented, the most connected, or the luckiest.

  Big Mama used to say all the time in her broken English, “It ain’t no good luck; it’s a good God!”

  Thank goodness, there is something in the universe bigger and greater than Tavis. Because I know this, I’m okay with the fact that I’m not human and divine—just human. As such, I know I’m going to fail from time to time. Here then is the question I’ve learned to wrestle with daily: How good is my failure? I’m okay with this formulation because I know that my Father always knows best and wants only the best for me. And that’s really all I need to know to keep it moving. To keep working every day to get better.

  And that’s why the words of Samuel Beckett resonate so with me: “Ever tried. Ever failed. N
o matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.”

  GRATITUDE

  With deep gratitude, I first thank Denise Pines for encouraging me to share the stories in this book.

  A very special thanks to Sylvester Brown, Jr. for his insights and hard work in the completion of this project.

  Much appreciation to Cheryl Woodruff and the team at SmileyBooks for shepherding this project through to completion on time.

  To Louise Hay, Reid Tracy, and all the good people at Hay House, thank you for being such a great partner.

  Finally, to my staff at The Smiley Group, Inc., thanks for everything each of you did to help me deliver a book of which we can all be proud—most especially, Danny Miles Davis, Dawn Fong, Kimberly Logan, Kimberly McFarland, Rhonda Nelson, Patrick Thomas, and Darryl Wesson.

  ABOUT THE

  AUTHOR

  From his celebrated conversations with world figures, to his work to inspire the next generation of leaders, as a broadcaster, author, advocate, and philanthropist, Tavis Smiley continues to be an outstanding voice for change. Currently, Smiley hosts the late night television talk show, Tavis Smiley on PBS, The Tavis Smiley Show distributed by Public Radio International (PRI), and is the co-host of Smiley & West (PRI). He is the first American to simultaneously host signature talk shows on both public television and public radio. In addition to his radio and television work, Smiley has authored fourteen books, including the book he edited, Covenant with Black America, which became the first nonfiction book by a Black-owned publisher to reach #1 on The New York Times bestseller list. He is also the presenter and creative force behind America I AM: The African American Imprint—an unprecedented traveling museum exhibition celebrating the extraordinary impact of African American contributions to our nation and to the world. In 2009, TIME magazine named him to their list of “The World’s 100 Most Influential People.” This year, 2011, marks his 20th year in broadcasting.

  NOTES

  NOTES

  SMILEYBOOKS TITLES OF RELATED INTEREST

  BOOKS

  THE COVENANT In Action

  Compiled by Tavis Smiley

  AMERICA IAM LEGENDS:

  Rare Moments and Inspiring Words

  Edited by SmileyBooks • Introduction by Tavis Smiley

  NEVER MIND SUCCESS … GO FOR GREATNESS!

  The Best Advice I’ve Ever Received

  by Tavis Smiley

  HOPE ON A TIGHTROPE

  Words &Wisdom

  by Cornel West

  PEACE FROM BROKEN PIECES:

  How to Get Through What You’re Going Through

  by Iyanla Vanzant

  BLACK BUSINESS SECRETS:

  500 Tips, Strategies and Resources for African American Entrepreneurs

  by Dante Lee

  BRAINWASHED:

  Challenging the Myth of Black Inferiority

  by Tom Burrell

  DVDs/CDs

  STAND: a film by Tavis Smiley

  ON AIR

  The Best of Tavis Smiley on the Tom Joyner Morning Show 2004–2008

  4-CD commemorative set with booklet

  All of the above are available at your local bookstore,

  or may be ordered online through Hay House

  (see contact information on next page)

  We hoped you enjoyed this SMILEYBOOKS publication.

  If you would like to receive additional information, please contact:

  SMILEYBOOKS

  Distributed by:

  Hay House, Inc.

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