“Yes, Jetah.”
Vunseleh’s footsteps left the room. Pur Sonaan stood silently for a moment. Then it moved, and Nicole felt a cloth in a hand drying her lap, drying the tears from her face.
“Why did you keep my uniform? Why?”
“It belongs to you. We need your permission to dispose of it.”
“Throw it out! Throw it out!”
Nicole pushed the drawer shut and let her hands fall to her lap. “Pur Sonaan, you are a Drac. You have to hate humans, don’t you?” She let the words hang in the air as she let her mouth form for the first time the words her mind would not allow herself to think. “Give me something.”
“Something, Joanne Nicole?”
“Anything that will kill me.”
She sensed the Jetah stand upright. Pur said nothing for long, strained moments; its breath coming in rapid hisses. Then it answered. “You think this to be a small favor you ask? You ask me to soil myself, Joanne Nicole! Never do so again!”
She felt its hands beneath her shoulders as it easily lifted her to her feet and led her to the bed. Nicole sat on the bed, her feet on the floor, her eyes dribbling more tears. “Pur Sonaan?”
“Yes?”
“If I am so important to this Tora Soam character, why does it never come to see me?”
Pur Sonaan snorted out a brief laugh. -“Tora Soam is Ovjetah of the Talman Kovah. The demands on its time, especially because of the war, are tremendous. But Tora Soam asks about you when it can… as does Sin Vidak, the child you saved. Did you know… that Sin Vidak has now entered training for the Tsien Denvedah?”
Nicole sat back, stunned. “The Tsien Denvedah? That little child?” Did I pull its narrow yellow ass out of the flames to provide fodder for the Drac meatgrinder? To hit the dirt in a little red suit and kill humans? “Sin Vidak has to be too young!”
“Joanne Nicole, Dracs reach adulthood in approximately a fifth of the time it takes humans.”
“I know, but still…”
“Sin Vidak is an adult now.” Pur Sonaan paused. “It has been a long time since you were in V’Butaan.” A long time.
“How long? In my time?”
Much later, Mitzak was sent in with the information. It had been twenty months since V’Butaan. Twenty months.
How could… how could I have lost almost two years?
She felt folds of cloth placed into her hands. “Here is your robe. Do you want me to help you put it on?”
“No.”
Mitzak left the room to be replaced by Pur Sonaan. Nicole used the palm of her right hand to wipe the wetness from her face.
The Drac spoke. “There is something I must say. Joanne Nicole, your life is your own property, and ending it is your right and your choice. But should you choose to end it, you must realize that the exercise of such a right is your own task. Never ask another to perform it for you.”
Pur Sonaan’s heavy footsteps left the room, and Joanne Nicole placed her face upon the bed.
She damned herself for her tears. But there was a little yellow child who was earning the right to proudly wear the red of the Tsien Denvedah, and there had to be tears.
SEVEN
“Curse the mistakes, rail at them, regret them, learn from them. But do not wish for the perfection of time when mistakes will no longer be made, for that is what we call death.”
The Talman
The Story of Cohneret. Koda Tarmeda
The next day on the floor, as Nicole tried to exercise, she listened to Mitzak reading the news.
“This is strange.”
“What’s strange, Mitzak?”
“The Ninth Quadrant study committee voted down the invitations-”
“Just as you said they would.”
“-but the vote was very close. Much closer than I expected. And Hissied ‘do Timan-delegate from Timan-was the only abstention.” Mitzak was silent for a long time.
“What are you thinking about?”
A pause then the sounds of Mitzak rearranging himself in his chair… I don’t understand the reason for this abstention.”
“Who can figure a Timan, Mitzak? Most of them are so wrapped up wheeling and dealing I doubt if they know themselves what they’re doing half of the time. After straining herself to do another situp, Nicole flopped flat on her back. “Mitzak, is there any news on the war?”
“Always.”
A silence, then he continued reading. “This day Het Kraakar, First Warmaster of the Dracon Fleet, announced through its representative that the Planet Ditaar has fallen to the forces of the United States of Earth. Figures on military and civilian casualties…”
Nicole heard him stand. “Excuse me.” His footsteps left the room.
Alone, listening to footsteps. It was cleaning. Nicole sat up. “Are you allowed to speak to me now?”
“Yes. Yes I am.” The voice was quiet, nervous, meek. “I would have talked much sooner-I have so many questions-but silence here is the rule.”
“I understand.”
“Joanne Nicole?”
“Yes-what is your name?”
“Vencha Eban. Joanne Nicole? Could you get up on the bed so that I can clean?”
“Of course.”
Nicole nodded, reached to the bed, and pulled herself to her feet. She retrieved her robe from the bed and pulled it on over her head, letting the cape wrap around her left arm. Sitting on the bed, she pulled up her feet.
“Vencha Eban, where can I take a shower? Clean myself?”
“There is a place attached to this room.” More footsteps, going to her right. “The door is locked. Perhaps you are not to wash until the healing of your skin is complete.”
“I would still like to stop using the bedpan. I can get around sufficiently.”
Nicole heard a door open. “The waste room is open for you.”
“Good.”
A series of bruises and barked shins had discouraged her from exploring that portion of the room very far, and all that she had found was the door that was locked.
“Jetah Pur Sonaan said it was very important that I talk to you, Joanne Nicole. Is there something is particular you wish to hear?”
“No. Anything.” She thought for a moment about Mitzak’s self-righteous attitude concerning talma. “Do you know anything about The Talman?”
“Of course. Reciting it is part of the right of adulthood.”
“Reciting it? The entire thing?”
“Yes. Would you like to hear a recitation?”
“Yes.”
“Is there any particular part you would like to hear?”
“No, Vencha Eban. Pick whatever you want. I just want noise.”
“It is not just noise.”
“I know. I meant no offense. Go on.”
“I will recite The Story of Shizumaat while I am cleaning. It is one of my favorites. You must remember that I speak this story as Namndas, the narrator of Shizumaat’s story.”
“I understand.”
As the tinny hum of cleaning continued in the room, Vencha Eban recited:
“I speak these things of Shizumaat to you; for I am Namndas, the friend of Shizumaat; the one who stood and waited at the mark.
“And this is my teacher’s story: The firstborn of Sindieah Nu was Sindieah Ay. After its parent had retired from the servants, and during Sindieah Ay’s rule of the servants of Aakva, the Temple of Uhe was completed.
“The cut-stone walls of the temple were as tall as eight Sindie and they enclosed an area of sixty by ninety paces. The roof of wooden beams and slabstone was supported by square stone columns arranged in six proportionate rectangles.
“At the center of the smallest rectangle was the great stone tomb that covered Uhe’s ashes. The eastern wall of the temple was an open row of stone columns. Northern and southern walls each had center doorways only two paces wide. The wall facing the Madah had no opening…”
Madah, Nicole thought to herself. What is the Madah? “During the day, light was provided b
y Aakva. the Parent of All; during the night, light was provided by the nine hundred oil lamps that were suspended from the temple’s great ceiling.
“The shelters around the temple were separated by narrow streets, and were made of both stone and wood. In one of these houses, covered by the afternoon shadow of the temple, a Sindie shaper of iron that was in Butaan to perform its duty to Aakva through labor gave birth to a child.
“The shaper of iron’s name was Caduah; and Caduah named its child Shizumaat.
“On the beginning of Shizumaat’s third year, Caduah entered its child in the temple to perform before the servants the rites of adulthood. Shizumaat recited the story of creation, the laws, and the story of Uhe; and then Shizumaat recited its family line from its parent, Caduah, to the founder of its line, the Mavedah hunter called Limish…”
Madah, again, thought Nicole. Except this time it is not vemadah; it’s Mavedah. The same name used by the Drac terrorists on Amadeen.
“And when the rites were completed, Caduah applied for Shizumaat to become a servant of Aakva.
“Ebneh was the servant who had heard the child’s recitation, and Ebneh was sufficiently impressed by the performance that it enrolled Shizumaat into the Aakva Kovah.
“The nights Shizumaat would spend in its parent’s house; the days Shizumaat would spend in the temple learning the secrets, signs, laws, wishes, and visions of the Parent of All.
“I, Namndas, had entered the Aakva Kovah the year before Shizumaat, and was placed in charge of Shizumaat’s class. I drew this duty because the servants of the temple considered me the least worthy of my own class. While my companions sat at the feet of the servants and engaged in learned discourse, I would chase dirt-”
Vencha laughed. It was not hard to see who Vencha identified with. Tail-End Charlie; the hind teat; the ten percent that never gets the word.
Nicole smiled. Namndas was a creature of the Universe, and it had lots of human company.
Vencha Eban, as Namndas, continued:
“My charges were assigned a place in the darkness next to the Madah wall of the temple, where my own class had begun the year before. On the morning of the first day of their instruction, they sat upon the smooth stone floor and listened as I spoke the rules of the temple.
“I, Namndas, am your charge-of-class. You are the lowest class in the temple, and for this reason, the care and cleaning of the temple is left to you. I tell you now that I will never find as much as a single fleck of dust in the temple while I am your charge-of-class. You will clean the filth from the air before it lands upon these stones; you will wash the dust from the feet of those who enter the temple.
“I pointed toward the soot-blackened ceiling. Every evening it is your responsibility to trim and fuel the temple’s lamps. Through all of this, you will keep clean yourselves.
“Shizumaat stood. It was tall for its age, and there was a strange brightness to its eyes. Namndas, when are we to be given our instruction? When will we learn?
“I felt my face grow hot. Such impudence! You shall be allowed to receive instruction when I inform Servant Ebneh that you are worthy. Sit and be silent! Shizumaat resumed its seat upon the floor, and I issued a glare that encompassed all nine of the students. You will not speak except in answer to a question from me or from one of the servants. You are here to learn, and the first thing you must learn is obedience.
“I narrowed my glare to Shizumaat and saw it carrying an enigmatic expression upon its face. I spoke to Shizumaat. I cannot read your face, new-charge. What does it say?
“Shizumaat remained seated upon the floor, but looked at me as it spoke. Does Aakva, then, judge its servants by how well they imitate the dumb animals and their skill at wielding a scrub rag?
“Your words court disaster.
“Namndas, when you asked your question, did you want from me lies or truth?
“This is a temple of truth. What are you called?
“I am called Shizumaat.
“Then, Shizumaat, I must tell you that I see little hope for your graduation from the Madah wall to the center of the temple.
“Shizumaat nodded and looked toward Uhe’s tomb. I think the truth serves you at last, Namndas-”
Nicole heard Pur Sonaan’s heavy footsteps enter the room, and there followed a delightful, horrified little gasp out of Vencha Eban. No words were exchanged, but Nicole’s skin virtually tingled with what she sensed to be highly meaningful glances between the Jetah and Vencha Eban.
“Do you have cleaning to do?”
“Yes, Jetah. I was just resting for a moment.”
“Emmm.”
The sounds of vigorous cleaning began.
Nicole spoke to the Jetah. “Is there anything new concerning my eyes?”
The Jetah sighed. “The more we learn, the closer we get; and the closer we get, the more there is to learn. The anatomy of the human eye is considerably different than ours, and human eyes for experimentation are not easy to come by.”
She sat up. “What?!”
“No! No! The kovah takes them only from the dead. I assure you. And we have been getting more information from captured medical texts, and from the USEF itself through the provisions of the war accords.” The Jetah paused for a moment. “I must tell you that we have an instrument that we can use on Drac patients who have been blinded. Implants are placed into the vision centers of the patient’s brain, and this enables the patient to see using gelatinous receivers that fit over the eyes.”
Nicole heard Vencha Eban tum off its equipment and steal quietly out of the room.
“Can you… can you do this for me?”
“As a last resort we might try. The procedure is well-established and quite common. However, we only use it when the sensory nerves leading from the eye have been destroyed. We have no reason to believe that yours have been damaged.”
“Pur Sonaan, would making those implants injure my optic nerves?”
“Probably. And the brain scans we have made have shown us that the differences-chemical, electrical, and structural-between human and Drac neural systems are considerable. Not only might not the procedure work with you, it might damage your vision centers beyond any repair. It might even kill you. We are planning nothing at present; I am just keeping you informed.”
Time for a new subject. “Pur Sonaan, I heard the word Madah and Mavedah used in that story Vencha Eban was reciting.”
“Yes?”
“Both Mavedah and vemadah mean of the Madah. But what is the difference between sticking the of in front or in the middle of the word?”
“It is the difference between modern usage and ancient formal usage. Vencha was reciting the Nuvida. You should begin earlier, with the Koda Sinda, The Myth of Aakva. Go straight to The Talman itself.”
Nicole smiled. “How do I do that?”
“Emmmm. I have a player. If I bring you my personal player will you use it quietly? I cannot have the other patients disturbed.”
“Yes. Yes, I’ll be very quiet.”
Sindie was the world.
And the World was said to be made by Aakva, the God of the Day Light…
…And Aakva was said to make on the world special creatures of yellow skin and hands and feet each of three fingers. And it was said to make the creatures of one kind, that each could bear its young, or the young of another. And it was said to make the creatures stand upright, make thought, and give voice that the creatures could worship the Parent of All.
It took very little time for Nicole to realize that The Talman began with the oldest written document known to the Drac race. The Myth of Aakva and The Story of Uhe both predated the Drac ancestral planet’s year dating system. Sindie was the ancestral planet, and year dates on that planet began with the birth of Shizumaat eleven thousand eight hundred and seventy-two of Sindie’s years ago. When Nicole asked, Mitzak informed her that Shizumaat was born in 9679 BC.
The Myth was a Book of Genesis for hermaphrodites. It described the creation of the r
ace and Aakva’s reason for the creation. In addition, it placed a priesthood firmly in control of everything.
…And the first chief of servants was named Rhada.
Rhada had the servants go among the Sindie and learn all of the signs and visions that were known. And the servants gathered this knowledge and gave it to Rhada.
For twelve days and twelve nights, the chief of the servants studied the signs and visions, and sorted the false from the true, the tribal lays from the true Laws of Aakva.
And on the thirteenth day, Rhada spoke to the servants what it had learned…
And Rhada ordered the servants to go among the Sindie and teach the Laws. And it was promised by Rhada that for just so long as the Sindie listened to Aakva’s servants and followed the laws the God of the Day Light made, there would be peace and plenty.
And the Sindie listened to the servants, learned the laws, and followed the laws. They made sacrifice to Aakva through its servants…
An old political structure: theocratic despotism. Pay your way into Heaven. But there was something about the verb tense used in The Myth of Aakva.
“And the world was said to be made by Aakva…” “It was said that Aakva called its children the Sindie…”
It was not stated as fact; it was stated as theological heresay. It was there to show beginnings. Nicole continued listening. There were many stories within the Myth: Summat, the doubter Daultha, Aakva’s curse of war upon the Sindie, Aakva’s division of the Sindie into the four great tribes.
She thought upon the universality of certain things: explanations, ideals, hopes. She picked up the tiny player, pulled herself out of bed, and began to walk the room as she listened to the Koda Ovida. The Story of Uhe.
It began with an explanation of the tabus that kept the four tribes from war. It continued with a story that began in a land… a land called the Madah.
Almost twelve thousand years ago, in a patch of hilly desert, before the world of Sindie was known to be a world, there was the Madah. It was a land of drought and famine.
The tribe of the Madah, the Mavedah, had been reduced to eating its own dead…
She heard Vunseleh’s footsteps enter the room, and moved to turn off the player. “Please, Joanne Nicole. Leave the story run. The reciter is Higa Tidanoa. Get on the bed, I shall apply your ointment, and we shall both listen.”
Enemy Papers Page 25