Being with Rand is making me a better person. I’m trying hard not to put so much value on a person’s outward appearance. I’ll always love my designer labels, but I realize now that the love I’ve found with Rand and my friendship with Tobi are so much more important. I mean, I wouldn’t turn down a Dooney, but tell me a girl who would? Besides, there is no twelve-step program for fashion addiction so I’m completely on my own. I might just fall off the wagon and fondle a Choo here and there. I’m only human.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Six months have passed since I saved the day. Lulu’s trial was like so long and boring that I thought I would lose my mind. There was no Law & Order stuff at all. Just endless hours of boring testimony from pretty much every person who had ever met her. The jury was unanimous. Lulu Hott would spend the next seven years in Comfort Seaside Sanitarium. I’m not sure where the seaside comes in being that Comfort is located in the middle of a cornfield, but it makes it sound better, than say, Comfort Loony Bin. Besides, Lulu likes seaside décor.
I’ve had my fifteen minutes of fame and then some. I can’t go anywhere without being recognized or asked for an autograph. An awesome picture of me was on the front page of the town newspaper with the caption of “Stylish super sleuth saves the day.” It’s been totally fun getting all of this attention.
Detective Malone tapped into some junior detective fund and gave Angel and me scholarships to State University. I can’t believe I have to put up with her for another four years. We have formed a tiny bond since the kidnapping though. I’m not talking best friends or anything, just a bit of a truce on trying to completely destroy each other.
State University wouldn’t be my first choice, but now that my parents don’t have to pay tuition, I’ll be able to rush a sorority. Heck, when they find out how famous I am, I won’t even have to rush. They’ll be begging me to join. I’m even thinking about going into law. I think I’d like to defend people like Lulu.
Rand even turned down Northwestern to follow me to State. He is absolutely smitten with me. I’m so glad we are going to be together because I don’t think I could bear to be without him. I’m not talking marriage at eighteen or anything, because that’s just setting yourself up for a midlife crisis. But we do have something special so who knows where it might lead someday.
I’ve even kept in touch with Lulu. I didn’t think it was right to just dump her so she added me to her visitors list. I’m pretty much the only name on the list. I visit her at least once a week. She is so grateful that she gave me all her shoes and purses. Jackpot! Of course that isn’t why I did it, but it was a total bonus.
I’ve tried to use my newfound fame to make her stay easier. The sanitarium requires that patients wear jumpsuits just like in prison. They are these hideous green rags that make everyone look totally washed out. I proposed a petition agreeing to let patients choose their own color jumpsuit. I mean, what the hell does it matter if they wear green or pink, if it makes them feel better about themselves? I circulated the petition around Comfort and collected 750 signatures. I hand-delivered it to the warden, who is going to take the issue under serious consideration.
Lulu is enrolled to get her cosmetology license through the local community college. Sometimes I even let her do my hair. She still does killer updos even with her hands being restrained. They had to cut off all her hair after the hot glue incident, but she’s wearing it in a shaggy bob and it looks really stylish. I even talked to the cafeteria workers and they agreed to specially make her meals. Lulu is forever grateful. Between the eye drop diarrhea incident and her new diet, she’s already lost thirty pounds. She’s going to be fabulous by the time she gets out of here. She already told me that one of the guards has been flirting with her. I wasn’t sure this was such good news, but she was so excited I didn’t want to bust her bubble. The warden won’t let her pass the time doing seashell art. I guess he’s afraid she might file one of the seashells down into a shank and try to escape. They are letting her continue making dolls though. After seeing mini-Aspen, Mattel and Dooney & Bourke teamed up to create a line of Dooney-toting Barbies. They are even thinking about creating a line of purses with Lulu’s tiara design. I better get the first bag since I was totally the inspiration for the design. Anyway, for the first time ever, Lulu is getting the positive reinforcement that she so desperately craves. Hopefully she can pull it together in the next seven years and come out a normal, functioning member of society. Not that you really have to be that normal in Comfort.
So right now I’m waiting in the backstage of the gymnasium. Tonight is our prom. Every year the school puts on a show called Grand March. The normal sweat-smelling, sneaker-streaked gymnasium is turned into a balloon-and-streamer induced paradise for one night. One by one the couples parade across a stage and their names are announced. The entire town shows up to see how great they look together and reminisce about their own prom. This is kind of like Rand and my coming-out party. Everybody knows we’re together, but we’ve never done an actual formal event until tonight.
I am looking fabulous in a custom-made Vera Wang (she couldn’t resist once she heard what a hero I am) gown. It’s the same petal-pink color as the first roses Rand ever gave me. It’s a flowing satin and taffeta confection that cascades all the way to the floor. The fitted bodice is strapless and the entire dress is covered in the tiniest silver stars. This is the most glamorous piece of clothing I have ever owned. I feel like a princess. My feet are adorned with strappy silver heels that match the stars to perfection. My blonde hair is swept into a perfect updo (thanks, Lulu). My silver Tiffany heart tag charm bracelet dangles from my wrist. I don’t think this night could get any better.
I’m still a teensy bit fashion obsessed, but I’m really working on it. I did buy my sandals at Payless. I wouldn’t have been caught dead in Payless a few months ago. So this totally proves I’ve grown.
“Okay, this is it. Hopefully I won’t trip,” Tobi says, grabbing my hand for last-minute support. She’s dressed in an adorable banana-colored form-fitting evening gown. She and Pippi decided to “come out” at the Grand March tonight. Her parents just think that she and Pippi really like having sleepovers. Tobi figured that her parent’s wouldn’t kill her if she comes out in front of so many people. I’m so nervous for her.
“Good luck. I love you,” I tell her, settling for air kisses instead of the real thing so neither of us gets our faces messed up. I can’t believe how stupid I was for ever thinking Tobi might hurt me. I’m so lucky to have such an awesome best friend. I’m so happy that she’s going to State and will be at my beck and call for another four years.
She takes a deep breath and gathers her courage, then steps onto the stage. I peek around the corner to see Pippi coming from the guy’s side dressed in an identical banana dress. Mr. Lowe announces the girl’s names. A hush falls over the crowd. I spot Tobi’s parents giving each other a glance that tells me they already knew their daughter’s secret. Slowly her parents rise from the bleachers and start clapping. Soon the entire gymnasium is on their feet yelling in support of Tobi and Pippi. Tobi is beaming and looks fantastic. My best friend is getting her dream come true and I couldn’t be happier.
It’s almost my turn and I keep peeking to try to see Rand. The only person I can see is Lucas clowning around. He’s waiting for Angel. They finally officially hooked up after the kidnapping incident. I think they might actually be good for each other. Lucas couldn’t get into State so he’s staying in Comfort to attend community college. I guess they’ll have to see if their minuscule attention spans can survive a long-distance relationship.
“I think it would be safe to say that our next couple is the closest Comfort has to royalty,” Mr. Lowe says. “Aspen Brooks and Rand Bachrach, come on out.” Mr. Lowe has been really cool about not holding a grudge especially since Harry confiscated his entire porn collection. Hey, I wonder if Angel’s dad has any he can spare? I gave a brilliant speech to the school board convincing them that while Mr. Lowe ma
y be a total freak in his spare time, he is still a really great teacher. They decided to make him principal.
I take the steps to the stage carefully. I may look fabulous, but these heels and gown are not the easiest things to maneuver. Once I reach the stage I see Rand entering from the guy’s side. Handsome. My caring, supportive, smart, rich boyfriend is so handsome. He’s wearing a black Ralph Lauren tuxedo with a light pink tie and cumberbund. The tux is great, but it’s not what makes him handsome. It’s the way his evergreen eyes are taking me in. It’s the way his perfect smile turns up at the edges just for me. It’s the way he just mouthed, “I love you.” I wouldn’t even care if Rand completely reverted back to his old look because I love his insides way more than his outside.
As we get close enough to each other to touch he takes my hand and we turn to face the crowd. Everyone is whistling and yelling. But as I soak up every detail it’s quiet in my mind. I’ve found someone who truly loves me. Oh, yeah, and I look totally fabulous. My life is perfect.
I can see my parents, who are both blowing us kisses. They haven’t been apart for a second since the kidnapping. Mom confessed her shopping addiction to Dad and we are helping her work through it. Her therapist says her shopping addiction was a residual effect of her D-list high school social status. Even though she transformed herself into a total hottie with a fabulous life she still felt unfulfilled. She’s totally getting it under control though. Just the other day she turned down an invitation to a jewelry party. I’m so proud of her! We even found a website called Bag Borrow or Steal. It’s like Netflix for purses. We are saving so much money. Now if we could just find one for shoes. Ew … on second thought I don’t really want to share somebody else’s toe jam.
As much as I love the spotlight I figure we’ve hogged it for long enough. I step forward to climb down from the stage, but Rand gently pulls me back. I turn to look at him confused when Mr. Lowe starts to make another announcement.
“Well, folks, it looks like they really are a royal couple. After counting six hundred unanimous votes, I’m happy to say that this year’s prom queen and king are Aspen Brooks and Rand Bachrach. Congratulations!” Cheers erupt throughout the gym.
I’m stunned. I was so absorbed in Rand that I completely forgot about the nominations. Someone places a tiara on my head, perfectly I might add, not a hair out of place, and hands me a silver wand with a star of the end of it. It matches my ensemble perfectly. Rand is fitted with his crown and then leans over and gives me one of those delicious kisses of his. It is so good to be me. Now, this is a movie moment.
ABOUT STEPHANIE HALE
Stephanie Hale is the author of Revenge of the Homecoming Queen, Twisted Sisters, Spring Breakup, and The Alpha Bet. She lives in Illinois with her husband and two sons. Visit her at www.stephaniehale.com
THE COPYRIGHT STUFF
Revenge of the Homecoming Queen is copyright Stephanie Hale, 2007. This ebook edition is copyright Stephanie Hale, 2012.
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Credits
Cover design and ebook conversion by 50 Seconds North Ebooks: www.50secondsnorth.com/ebooks
Table of Contents
Title Page
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
About Stephanie Hale
The Copyright Stuff
Revenge of the Homecoming Queen Page 21