Loving him was probably a study in futility, and yet she couldn’t help the tiny flicker of hope that burned in her heart.
Despite his firm words to her that he had no intention of getting involved with anyone again, she knew he cared about her, knew he cared about her more than he might be willing to admit.
But did he care enough that he’d want to pursue a relationship with her after all this madness had ended? She hoped so. She was sipping a cup of the fresh brew when he came into the kitchen.
He’d showered and was dressed in a clean uniform. His hair was neatly combed, and as he walked over to pour himself a cup of coffee she couldn’t help but admire his attractiveness. But it was his inner qualities that drew her, his gentleness and intelligence, his ability to comfort and offer support under the worst of circumstances.
He got his coffee then joined her at the table, and she saw that despite the shower he looked tired. “You can’t have slept well on the sofa,” she said.
“I’m okay,” he replied.
She drew a deep breath. “You could have stayed in bed with me.”
“I didn’t think that was a good idea. I might have accidentally jostled you in the night.” He gazed at her a moment, then focused outside the nearby window—but not before she saw the flare of heat in his eyes. His mouth might say one thing to her, but his eyes told her something else altogether.
She wanted to tell him that she was in love with him, but she knew the timing wasn’t right. He had India’s murder and the attack on her on his mind. There wasn’t space for her to speak her mind to him. She had a feeling it would only add to his burden. Eventually there would be a time when she could speak to him from her heart; she just knew that time wasn’t now.
Peyton had just finished her cup of coffee when she heard the sound of Lilly awaken. She left the kitchen and went into the nursery to take care of her daughter.
Lilly greeted her with a happy smile, and as she changed her diaper, love filled Peyton’s heart. From the moment she’d realized she was pregnant with her daughter, Peyton had prepared herself for being a single parent.
She knew how to be alone. She’d been alone most of her life, but there was a difference in knowing you would be okay alone and wanting something different.
She wanted Tom in her life, not just as a sheriff protecting her but as a man loving her. For the first time in her life she felt a need inside her where another human being was concerned, and that scared her more than just a little bit.
Once she had Lilly changed, she carried her back into the kitchen, where Tom was already on his cell phone. She placed the baby in the infant seat then made a bottle as he walked into the living room to complete his call.
When he returned to the kitchen, she was sitting and feeding Lilly her bottle. As much as she felt safe with him here, as much as she wanted him here with her day and night, night and day, she was struck by the fact that as sheriff he shouldn’t be holed up in her house; he should be in his office taking care of business.
“Tom, if I had my way I’d have you living here for ever.” She felt the heat of a blush warm her cheeks as she realized perhaps her words gave too much away of what was in her heart.
“But you have a job and I know you can’t do it effectively playing bodyguard here to me,” she continued. “I have the alarm system and I feel relatively safe here. You need to get back to work, in your office. Find the man who killed India. Find the man who attacked me. That’s your job, not babysitting me.”
He walked over to the coffeepot and poured himself a cup, then turned to face her. “You’d have to agree not to leave the house for anything. If you or Lilly need something, anything, then you have to promise to call me and I’ll take care of it.”
“I can do that,” she agreed. “Trust me, after what happened to me at the park, I’m not eager to leave this house for anything.”
He took a sip of his coffee, his gaze remaining on her. “I’ve got my men working on various angles of both crimes. I’ll hang out here until noon and see where we are with everything.”
She nodded, pleased that she would have him with her for another half a day.
The morning passed all too quickly. As Lilly went down for her morning nap, Peyton made breakfast for her and Tom.
As they ate they talked about everything but the crimes. They talked about favorite foods and old movies, they spoke of the predictions of a harsh winter to come and the hot summer still here.
Each and every fact she learned about him only solidified her feelings for him. They were alike in the ways that mattered and not alike in ways that would be stimulating and exciting.
There was a part of her that believed that fate had somehow brought them together, that he was a man who needed to love and she and Lilly had all the love in the world to give to him.
But at noon as he prepared to leave, she realized it was equally possible that fate was toying with her, bringing into her life a man she loved but who would never allow himself to become a part of her life.
“I’m not entirely comfortable leaving you here alone,” he said at the front door. “I’ll make sure a squad car comes by periodically to make sure everything is all right.”
“The security system will do the job, and besides, how long can you be my bodyguard and let all the other business of Black Rock fall by the wayside?”
“You promise you’ll call me if you need anything,” he asked.
“I promise,” she replied.
“And you’ll take a pain pill if you need it?” He raised a hand, as if to touch her face, but then quickly dropped it back to his side. “You look like you need one.”
She forced a smile to her face. “I’m fine. If I need one later I’ll take one. You’ll keep me posted on what’s happening with the investigation?”
“Of course,” he replied as he opened the front door.
She wanted to tell him she had fallen in love with him, but she was afraid to bare her soul to a man who she suspected was at this very moment telling her goodbye.
“Lock the door and set the alarm when I leave,” he said.
She nodded. “I will.”
His eyes were dark, fathomless, as he gazed at her. “We’ll get him, Peyton, and hopefully very soon you’ll be able to get back to your real life.”
He didn’t wait for her to reply, and she watched as he walked down the sidewalk and got into his car. As he pulled out of the driveway, an emptiness filled her.
Maybe she’d have the chance to tell him that she loved him after this was all over. When India’s killer was in jail and Peyton’s attacker had been caught, then maybe Tom’s heart would be open to her.
Tom drove away from Peyton’s and drew a deep, long breath of relief. He’d been on edge all night after helping her into bed, and that same tension had filled his chest all morning.
It was as if his body and his brain had disconnected where Peyton was concerned. He always figured he’d spend the rest of his life alone, and yet every time he looked at Peyton, each time she was close to him, a sweeping desire soared inside him.
It was more than the desire to make love to her, although that particular want roared through him with an intensity that stunned him.
The problem was he liked waking up to her presence, to that beautiful smile that warmed him from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He liked sharing his first cup of coffee of the day with her, talking to her about everything and nothing.
If he looked deep in his heart, he’d even admit that he was charmed by Lilly, who rarely had a cranky moment and seemed to spend most of her days bestowing smiles on whoever came near.
“Crazy love,” he muttered as he pulled into the parking space in front of his office. Surely that’s all it was, a false sense of closeness induced by what they’d been through together.
He could never give her what she was looking for in a man, and in any case he wasn’t willing to try. She needed a man whose heart was unfettered by loss, a man who cou
ld make her and Lilly number one in his life.
He got out of his car and tried to push thoughts of her out of his mind. He had work to do, and there was no question he’d do it better from his office than from Peyton’s house.
What he needed more than anything was physical distance from her, and escaping into his office and work was what he did best.
Sam greeted him as he came in the door. “Hey, boss. I didn’t know you were coming in today.”
“I can’t bodyguard for Peyton Wilkerson for the rest of my life. The best thing to do is figure out who’s responsible and get them behind bars. But tell Caleb and Benjamin I want them to rotate hourly drive-bys on her house.”
Sam nodded. “Done. On that note, I’ve got two things to tell you. I managed to track down Cliff Gunther. He’s at his parents’ home in Arizona, has been there since walking out on his job.”
“So, he couldn’t be responsible for the attack on Peyton.”
Sam nodded. “Also, Benjamin is out interviewing one of Buck’s neighbors. The neighbor says he saw India Richards’s car parked at Buck’s on more than one occasion.”
“So Buck lied about hanging with India just one night. Gee, why am I not surprised?” Tom frowned thoughtfully. “Get Caleb to meet Benjamin at Buck’s place. I want him brought in for questioning. Maybe sitting in our little interrogation room he’ll feel more like telling the truth. And, Sam, I want you to do your magic on the computer and get me everything you can find on Rick Powell.” From the moment Tom had met Rick, something hadn’t felt right. Now he had a hunch that might or might not play out.
“Done,” Sam replied. He was on the phone before Tom entered his own office.
Tom closed the door and at his desk pulled out the files on both crimes that were uppermost in his mind. He opened the file for India’s murder. He’d read through it over a dozen times but hoped that this time he’d see something he’d missed.
He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting studying the files, when their guest of honor arrived. Buck Harmon filled the air with a string of expletives as he was led to the interrogation room next to Tom’s office.
A moment late Caleb poked his head in Tom’s door and offered him a grin. “He’s here, and he’s not happy.”
“He’ll be even less happy after I’m finished with him,” Tom replied as he got up from his desk.
There had been a rage in Tom since the moment he’d arrived at the park and had seen Peyton on the ground, and even though he’d managed to stuff that rage down for the last couple of days, he felt it now rising up inside him.
He couldn’t help but think that the kidnapping, the murder and the attack on Peyton were all related; he just hadn’t been able to figure out the missing link. Was Buck that link?
Time to find out what Buck was hiding and why. As Tom entered the interrogation room with Benjamin, Buck glared at him with belligerent defiance.
“What the hell, Sheriff? What’s going on?”
“We need to have a little chat, Buck,” Tom said, his voice deceptively friendly. “You want something to drink? Maybe a coffee or something?”
“All I want is to get out of here,” Buck replied. “Ask me whatever you need to so I can get out of here.”
Tom eased down in the chair next to Buck at the table while Benjamin stood guard at the door. “India Richards,” Tom said.
“We already had that talk,” Buck exclaimed as he averted his gaze from Tom’s.
“I think maybe you left some things out,” Tom replied. “You told me that you’d only seen India one night, but we have witnesses that place her car at your place more than one night.”
Buck shot up straighter in his chair. “Then they’re lying.”
“And why would your neighbors lie about you?” Tom asked.
Buck snorted, as if the answer were obvious to any idiot. “They think my truck is too loud and my place is an eyesore.”
“And so they would lie to get you into trouble,” Tom said, his voice filled with his disbelief. He stood with an abruptness that made Buck jump in surprise. “He doesn’t want to play nice, so I guess I won’t, either,” he said to Benjamin. “Book him on murder charges.”
“Whoa, wait a minute.” Buck shot out of his chair and Benjamin stepped forward, his gun drawn. Buck instantly raised his hands above his head to show he meant no menace. “Okay, okay. I’ll tell you the truth.” He eased back down in the chair and looked up at Tom.
Tom sat back at the table. “I’m listening.”
“It’s true that I met her down at Harley’s and after we left there we stopped and bought some more beer and hung out at my place. After that she’d sometimes just drop in to talk and have a beer. We weren’t having sex. It was nothing like that. She told me she had a boyfriend and wasn’t going to cheat on him. I just got the feeling she was lonely.”
“Why didn’t you tell me all this when I first asked you about her?” Tom asked.
“I don’t exactly have the best reputation around these parts,” he said dryly. “I’d heard she’d kidnapped a kid, then had been murdered and I didn’t want to be involved in any of it.”
“You are involved, Buck, whether you want to be or not.” Tom leaned back in his chair and eyed the young man across from him.
His mind filled with a vision of Peyton’s ribs, black and blue from somebody kicking her with a bone-crushing force. He looked down to the boots Buck wore, and the rage he’d been fighting rose to the surface.
“Maybe you were worried that Peyton Wilkerson knew you were friends with India.” He stood once again and leaned over Buck, invading his personal space. “Maybe you saw her the other night in the park and figured you could keep her from telling that you and India were friendly with each other.”
A red haze fell before Tom’s eyes. “Is that what happened, Buck?” Tom grabbed the front of his shirt and half pulled him from the chair. “Were you afraid that Peyton might know too much, and so you shoved her to the ground and kicked her over and over again?”
“Tom, that’s enough.” Benjamin’s voice cut through the red haze, and Tom realized he was shaking Buck like a rag doll. He released his hold on him and stepped back, appalled by his own lack of control.
“Get him out of here,” Tom said. “Lock him up until I decide what to do with him.”
As Benjamin lead the protesting Buck away, Tom sank back into the chair. He could hold Buck twenty-one hours without charging him.
That gave him twenty-one hours to try to find out if Buck was a cold-blooded killer who had not only murdered India but had also attacked Peyton, or if he was just a dumb putz who just happened to run into the wrong woman at a bar.
The day seemed endless to Peyton. She played with Lilly, cleaned the kitchen and then paced the floor, wondering if her life would ever be normal again.
What if Tom never found the person who had attacked her? What if he never found out why India had kidnapped Lilly and who had killed India?
How could Peyton hope to live a normal life if there was no resolution to the crimes? She would forever be looking over her shoulder, wondering if her attacker might strike again, this time with deadly results.
If she wasn’t thinking about the crimes, then her thoughts were filled with Tom. She wanted to believe that there was some sort of future with him, but she knew she was probably fooling herself.
At three o’clock when her doorbell rang and she peeked out and saw Rachel, she was thrilled by the distraction of a visit from this new friend.
“I just thought I’d stop by and check in on you,” Rachel said as Peyton led her into the kitchen.
“I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you. Sheriff Grayson doesn’t want me leaving the house, and even though I don’t need to go out for anything, I’m suddenly feeling like a prisoner in my own home.” Peyton gestured her to a seat at the table. “Can I get you something cold to drink? Iced tea or a soda?”
“Tea would be great. How are you feeling?”
&nb
sp; “A little rough today,” Peyton admitted. “It’s not too bad if I don’t breathe too deeply or move too fast. And God forbid I sneeze or cough.”
“And there’s still no clue as to who did this to you?” Rachel asked.
“No. None.” Peyton placed the tea on the table, then took the seat across from Rachel. “Where’s your daughter?”
“Ah, twice a week I take her to Portia’s Playpen for play time. She has a wonderful time and mommy gets a little downtime to visit friends or just sit and read a book without interruption.”
“I’ve arranged for Portia to take care of Lilly when I start teaching. I have to confess, since the kidnapping the idea of leaving her with anyone is a little frightening.”
“Portia is amazing, and she’ll love your Lilly just like you do,” Rachel replied. “Trust me, you’re putting her in good hands.”
“That’s good to know. Tom only had good things to say about Portia. He said she and Caleb dated while they were in high school.”
“Everyone just assumed they’d get married and live happily ever after, but I guess not all high school romances can go the distance.”
“I didn’t have time to have a high school romance,” Peyton said. “I was working two jobs in high school and living on my own.”
For the next hour the two women visited, sharing pieces of their past, talking about their present and their hope for the future for their daughters.
It was just after four when Rachel stood to go home. “I need to get dinner started. David likes to eat at five-thirty on the dot, and I’m trying a new chicken recipe tonight.”
Peyton walked with her friend to the door. “I really appreciate you stopping by,” she said as she unarmed the security system. “I’m eager to make lots of friends here in Black Rock.”
Rachel offered her a friendly smile. “Consider Dawn and me two of your first.”
Peyton was still smiling after Rachel left. Once Tom solved the issue of who had attacked her and life returned to normal, she knew she was going to like it here in Black Rock.
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