by Jordan Marie
“Damn straight I am,” he says, as I feel his fingers separating, stretching me, readying me for what comes next. I bring my legs up opening myself to him, because I need it.
I need everything Gavin O’Leary will give me. All of it…and more.
God help me, I need much more.
13
Casey
“Uh no. You cannot wear that to dinner,” Gavin all but growls. I turn away from the mirror to stare at him. He’s standing at the door to his bedroom looking better than any man has the right to. He’s wearing dark jeans and a buttoned-up white, dress shirt that has a couple of the top buttons undone.
We’ve been “dating” for a full week now. It seems longer. It feels longer. The time I’m with Gavin is special. I’ve never had this connection with anyone else in my life. He makes me laugh, he makes me feel stronger, he makes me feel safe and he makes me happy. Really happy. He feels like what I imagined being home should have always felt like, but never did. A safe place that you come to every night to regroup, breathe and enrich your soul.
That’s crazy talk, I know. Especially considering I essentially slept with him on our second date. Even crazier if you add in the fact that in the week since we’ve slept together I haven’t left his house. He hasn’t let me and admittedly, I haven’t tried very hard. I had every intention of leaving the next morning. Gavin followed me home, came inside for lunch and instead of leaving helped me pack an overnight bag—a very large overnight bag. An overnight bag that we went and refilled tonight. I say refilled because he wouldn’t let me pack any of my things to take back home. Again, I realize I didn’t try very hard to fight him. What woman would? I’m happy and whereas before I ignored Gavin’s over the top flirting, now I’m starting to think he’s serious. He likes me…he more than likes me. Tonight he’s taking me to dinner with his best friends to show me off and he told me that with…pride.
“What are you talking about?”
“You are not going to dinner looking like that Casey,” he says, his face completely serious.
“What’s wrong with the way I’m dressed? Are you afraid I’m going to embarrass you?”
“Quit being stupid Moth-girl.”
“Then quit being a moron, dude.”
His face breaks into a slight smile as he walks to me. My heart starts beating faster.
“Do you know how fantastic this week has been, Casey Langley?” he asks, bending his head down to rest it against mine.
“It’s been a crazy week, that’s for sure,” I answer.
“It’s been the best week of my life,” he says pulling my hands into his and holding them loosely. “Do you know why?”
“Why?” I ask, softly.
“Because of you. Because you’re in it, because you’re with me, and because we’re together.”
“Quit trying to make me cry, I just put on my mascara,” I grumble gently, my heart feeling full.
“I think I need to remind you of all the reasons you belong to me,” he tells me and I know that look in his eye. I know it too well. It’s the look that tells me if I give in—and I really want to—he’ll make us very late.
“We have to meet Aden and Titan at the restaurant in less than an hour. We don’t have time to do what your eyes say you have in mind.”
“There’s always time to do what I want to you. For that, Casey, we make time,” he whispers, kissing me. I lose myself in his kiss and when we draw back I look up at him, trying to remember why I was telling him no.
“Gavin,” I whisper, melting into him.
“I love it when you say my name.”
“We’re going to be late,” I warn him half-heartedly.
“Do you care?” he challenges, but he knows my answer. I can tell by the way he’s grinning. Plus, he’s unzipping the back of my dress. “Besides once we’re finished you can get dressed…differently.”
“What’s wrong with my dress?” I laugh, taking my arms out of the dress, once he has me unzipped.
“Not a damn thing, I don’t want my buddies looking at this gorgeous body of yours.”
“You’re being ridiculous,” I tell him, shaking my head. He is. My dress is very modest, the most it shows is my arms. It does hug my curves in a flattering way and gives the briefest hint of cleavage. It’s black silk with a lace overlay and I know it looks good on me. I should be upset with the way he’s acting, but I’d lie if I didn’t admit I like it. I’ve never had someone be jealous over me, or who thought I was beautiful—to the point his friends might like me a little too much.
“We’ll argue about it later,” he mumbles in my ear. “After I remind you that you belong to me.”
“Quit talking,” I demand. “You have too many clothes on,” I tell him spinning around and gathering the ends of his shirt up, pulling it up his body. I smile with satisfaction as he bends down and helps me yank it over his head.
He really is perfect.
14
Gavin
“There they are,” I sigh, half wishing they hadn’t showed. “Damn it.”
“Oh will you stop. You’re acting like a little kid,” Casey laughs.
She doesn’t understand. Hell, I’m not sure I understand. I keep my arm around her, pulling her close to my side, my hand lying blatantly on her hip. If I could tattoo the words “Taken! Back off,” on her, I would. In fact, that might not be a bad idea. People get tattoo’s all the time.
“You really should have worn the outfit I picked out for you,” I mumble right before we get to my buddies table.
“It’s ninety degrees outside!”
“So?”
“You picked out a long sleeved sweater that came to my knees and a long skirt that came to my ankles.”
“It was a pretty outfit,” I lie.
“The shirt was forest green and the skirt was florescent yellow!”
“Well, I liked it,” I sigh. Then I look up at my boys and sure enough they’re both checking Casey out. I may not get out of this dinner with my friendships in tack.
“Bout time,” Aden says, the first of the two to drag his eyes away from my woman to look at me.
“Yeah, yeah. Titan man, if you don’t quit looking at my woman I’m going to punch you,” I growl, when it becomes clear the asshole is going to keep his eyes on my woman’s ass.
“Will you quit being a moron?” Casey exclaims. “Sorry, I think Gavin forgot to take his medicine,” she says reaching out her hand to Titan.
“Nah, babe. He’s right. I was totally checking your ass out,” he says smoothly and then to prove he has a death wish brings her hand to his mouth and kisses it.
“I’m going to punch those perfectly capped teeth,” I mutter under my breath. Casey laughs and then elbows me in the stomach.
“What the hell was that for?”
“You’re being annoying,” she says sitting down.
“I see you two are getting along as well as ever,” Aden jokes. I flip him off, while resisting the urge to pull Casey into my lap—barely.
“Hey, Aden. Good to see you again.”
“Hey Casey, you still hanging around with this loser?”
“Fuck—” I start, which gets me another elbow by Casey.
“For now,” she interrupts.
“Damn it, Moth-girl that hurts.”
“Moth-girl?” Titan laughs.
“It’s a horrible nickname he insists on calling me. You know, like I call him moron.”
“I liked dude better,” I tell her mournfully, to which she sticks out her tongue. This causes my buddies to laugh.
“I do believe you’ve met your match O’Leary,” Titan says and he’s not wrong.
I truly have and I’m keeping her.
15
Casey
I’m feeling out of my depth. I won’t lie. The past week with Gavin has been wonderful. But, for the most part it has only been the two of us. We don’t even see each other at work. Because of our hours we don’t even drive in together. I leave way before
he does most times, and there are days he doesn’t even have to be on set. This is the first time that I’ve been with Gavin socially and I feel myself panicking a little bit.
I’m sitting at a table with a huge movie star and a football player that gets paid millions of dollars. People are coming over to the table asking for autographs and things and here I am feeling way out of my depth. These men each look like they belong on a runway. You expect that with Aden, being practically Hollywood royalty, but Titan is the same. He’s got the athletic build of a football player, or sexy stripper… he could definitely be a stripper. His skin reminds me of milk chocolate and he has a smile that makes you want to sin. If I wasn’t in love with Gavin, I’d be like the other women swarming the table flirting.
Truthfully, the hardest thing is the women. They come over wanting napkins signed, pictures, hugs…one girl even asked Titan to sign her boobs. He did without blinking. They asked what Gavin did and when they found out he was a stuntman they flirted with him too—admittedly not as much as they did with Aden or Titan, but it was still there.
I became invisible.
Which is great. That’s not what is bothering me. In this instance, I prefer to be invisible. What’s bothering me is the fact that this is Gavin’s life. I don’t fit in. It’s the same old story of the nerd and the football star in high school, only it’s worse now. Gavin’s circle is freaking famous. This would be my life no matter where we go.
The women looking Gavin’s way are beautiful, skinny, with perfect figures and some of them are in pants that I couldn’t put one leg in. Why is he even fooling with me? Why am I here? He seems possessive. He makes me feel beautiful. Could he truly be that attracted to me? Is it possible? Me? Plain, Casey Langley has caught the eye of Gavin O’Leary? It seems like that’s what is happening, but why can’t I shake off the nerves and doubts?
“You okay, honey?” Gavin asks, noticing that I’m distracted.
He’s smiling down at me and his blue eyes are warm. He brings his hand to my face brushing it gently and his face is etched with concern. I do my best to shake off my concerns. Gavin cares about me. He has to, there’s no other explanation for everything that’s happened. I’m allowing my past and the things my mother drummed into my head to affect me.
“I’m good. Lost in my thoughts, I was—”
“Gavin O’Leary is that you?” my head jerks around, because I know that voice. I’ve hated that voice.
“Bella,” Gavin says getting up and confirming my worst fears. “How have you been?”
“Busy as ever. I start shooting in St. Croix next week.”
“Congratulations on the Oscar. I read about it.”
“Thanks. I was proud of that film,” she answers. I knew of course that she got the Oscar, but I tried to forget. There’s not much happiness to be found when your high school nemesis is successful.
Okay so she wasn’t my nemesis, but she was everything I despised in school and she had Gavin. So I mean, it would be nice if she weighed three hundred pounds instead of still being a size zero. I’d at least feel better if she had wrinkles, gray hair, maybe a beard…or a wart…
She’s talking to Aden and Titan now. I can tell they’re all friends. If it was only Aden she was chummy with I’d think it was because they were all in the same business, but it’s clear she knows Titan really well too. They’re talking, the three of them and I’m here…feeling invisible, but not in a good way—not even in the way the fans made me feel. I’m invisible as if I were insignificant. It’s the same feelings I used to get around my mother and I hate those feelings.
“Oh I’m sorry! I’ve been monopolizing the men and I didn’t even see you there. I’m Bella Dupree,” she says, yanking me out of my morose thoughts. I jerk my head up to look at her, noticing she’s reaching her hand out.
“Hi, I’m Casey,” I tell her shaking her hand, feeling more and more out of my depth. When Gavin puts his arm around me, it doesn’t really help ward off the thoughts and feelings I’m having.
“Casey went to high school with us Bella,” Gavin says.
“I’m sorry, I’m horrible with names and it’s been so long,” she says helplessly. She’s actually being very nice and sounds sincere. If I could shake off my old insecurities, I would appreciate that fact.
“It’s okay, we didn’t exactly move in the same circles,” I tell her, but Gavin interrupts me before I can continue.
“This is Moth-girl,” he declares proudly as I look up at him in shock. Did he tell Bella about me? Was he being truthful when he said he thought of me a lot over the years?
“Man, I’m telling you, you have got to stop with that nickname,” Aden whines in the background and I can hear Titan talking too, but I have them tuned out. My attention is solely on Gavin and I feel this hope bloom in my chest. He told Bella about me. He told his-girlfriend-at-the-time Bella about me! That’s significant. It has to be.
“This was the girl who gave you that god-awful advice to pursue football?” Bella laughs.
And immediately my hope fades.
It wasn’t me that was significant to Gavin back then—just my advice.
Which really makes sense, but for some reason—that I don’t want to figure out, it makes me sad.
“That’s me,” I laugh, but the laugh feels and sounds hollow. I wonder how no one else notices, but I’m glad they don’t.
16
Gavin
“You okay?” I ask Casey again. It seems like that’s all I’m asking her, but something is wrong. I can feel it. She was quiet throughout dinner, even quieter during the ride home and now that we’re lying in bed she’s paying more attention to the television than she is me. That’s not exactly great for a man’s ego.
“I’m fine,” she says again for the hundredth time. It’s that pleasant tone. The one that tells you a woman is anything but fine. This is why I’ve never done relationships—well besides the fact that until Casey, I never wanted to. Why can’t women straight out tell you what’s going on?
I reach over for the remote, turning the television off. I roll to my side and pull Casey in my arms. She comes willingly, but I can’t help but feel like there’s something between us that wasn’t there earlier.
“What if I was watching that?” she grumbles, laying her head against my chest as I tuck her head under my chin, holding her as close as I physically can.
“We’re not at that stage of our relationship,” I respond.
“What stage is that?”
“The stage where you’d rather watch late night trash television instead of worshipping my body.”
“You’re such a dweeb,” she says, but she’s laughing.
“Dweeb? The love names you call me Casey are overwhelming. I don’t know if dweeb tops moron, but it’s close.”
“Hey, if the shoe fits,” she answers, but she places a soft kiss against my chest and tightens her hold on me and I have to believe that’s a good sign.
“Tell me what’s on your mind, Moth-girl?” I whisper after we’re quiet for a bit. The room is dark now, but my arms are full of Casey, her body is pressed against mine and it soothes me. I could die a happy man like this.
“What makes you think—”
“Come on, Casey. I might be new to this relationship thing, but I know when something is wrong with a woman.”
I know as soon as I say it, that it was the wrong thing to say because she tenses up briefly before sighing and it’s a sigh that is steeped in sadness.
“Maybe that’s the problem, Gavin.”
“I wasn’t aware we had a problem.”
“We…don’t fit. We never have.”
“I think we fit together perfectly. Do I need to remind you of how well we fit?”
“Not sexually, moron!”
“Yeah, I’m thinking that one is my favorite pet name.”
“Whatever. I’m trying to explain that our worlds are too different.”
I roll over on my back, and pull Casey over me. I br
ace my hands on each side of her face so we are looking at each other. There’s a faint glow of light from the moon shining in the windows, and I see the worry etched on her face. I need it gone.
“I was under the impression that there’s only one world, Casey,” I respond, using my fingers to gently push some of her hair off of her face and I’m unable to resist letting my thumb stroke back and forth along the delicate bone along her cheek to her chin.
“You know what I mean, Gavin,” she says softly.
“Look around this room, Casey. You’re here with me. We’re together. We’re the only two people in my world right now.”
“But outside of here…”
“It doesn’t matter. I enjoy my work, but since you’ve come back into my life, it’s the end of the day I look forward to the most.”
“Gavin…”
“I spend my days working, doing my job around colleagues and friends, but I’m ridiculously anxious to do nothing more than to get home to you.”
“I know. I feel the same way. We jumped into this thing head first, and at the speed of light. What if we’re rushing things?”
“As far as I’m concerned, we’re not moving fast enough.”
“I’m practically living with you now. I don’t see how that’s not fast enough.”
“That’s what I mean. You aren’t living with me. You’re still living out of a damn overnight bag and a stack of clothes in the corner. Hang them up in the closet already and let’s go get the rest of your stuff and move it in here. Having two places is a waste of time and money.”
“Now you’re talking crazy.”
“I’m being completely serious. I want you under my roof. A roof I pay for, with food I provide and…” I stop when she slaps her hand over my mouth.
“You need to stop there before you start pissing me off. This is not the dark ages. I work. I can buy my own food and…”