by Darcy Burke
She scanned the shelves full of inkwells and tried to figure out how that could be when she’d checked every other place that sold them. This store had been her last hope.
“Perhaps there is something else that will suit your needs?”
With a sigh, she shook her head. “No. It’s the only kind I want.”
“If something like that comes in, would you like me to send you a message?”
“No.” She couldn’t afford that in case the message got to Perry before it got to her. “Thank you for your assistance.”
She left the store and scanned the businesses. There was nowhere she could go. Her mission was a lost cause. She didn’t know what to do now. Her brother would never give it back, and if she stole it, he’d run straight to Perry and tell him everything.
She considered her options as she trudged down the street. She could keep pretending she had no idea where the inkwell was if Perry mentioned it. She could make up some story about losing it. She could even come out and tell him she gave it to her brother. But then he’d want to know why she’d give her brother something that was a gift from his friend. And what could she tell him? Because her brother would tell him he made a mistake in marrying her? She couldn’t bear the disappointment he was bound to feel.
So telling him the truth was not an option. That left her with the choice of acting like she had no idea what happened to it or telling him she misplaced it. Either way, she’d be lying, and she honestly didn’t see how those options were any better than the first.
As she crossed a street, she caught sight of the townhouses and paused when she recognized Nate and Claire’s. The only reason she knew it was theirs was because Perry had pointed it out to her during one of their walks. She slowed her steps and bit her lower lip. If she could ask Claire where she and Nate got the inkwell, then she’d know where to go to get it. But she couldn’t just go right up to the door and arrive unannounced. The best thing to do was to ask Claire if she could visit her.
She turned away from the steps leading to the townhouse when a carriage pulled up next to her. Surprised, she looked up in time to see Claire and Lord Edon’s wife—Catherine, if she remembered right—wave at her from the small window. She offered a tentative wave back. She wasn’t sure what she had in common with ladies who never did anything wrong. From the dinner party, she got the impression they were perfect. Perfect in their manners. Perfect in their past. Perfect on their wedding night. She hadn’t known what to say as they talked in the drawing room and had been relieved when Perry asked her if they could leave.
Now, as the footman helped them down from the carriage, she took a deep breath and told herself to relax. It would be all right. All she had to do was ask about the inkwell. Then she could be on her way to the place Claire got it from.
“Would you like to join Catherine and me for some tea?” Claire asked as she tucked a hatbox under her arm.
“Oh, um,” Paula cleared her throat, “I’m on my way home. But,” she quickly added before she lost Claire’s attention, “Perry showed me the inkwell you and your husband gave him. Do you remember it?”
“Of course I do. We had Mister Williams make it.”
“Mister Williams?”
“He’s a friend of my brother-in-law. He makes things for people that can’t be duplicated anywhere else. That’s why we wanted him to make the inkwell for Perry. We wanted to make sure no one else had something like it.”
That explained why she couldn’t find it anywhere. What were the chances Mister Williams would make it for her, knowing full well that he’d made it for someone else? Maybe she could explain her case and he’d make another one. All she had to do was tell him she lost it and didn’t want to upset her husband. It was another lie, something she didn’t want to do. But it was better than nothing.
“I’d love to go there and see what else he can make,” Paula said. “Where can I find him?”
“I can take you there.”
“No,” she quickly said then stopped when she saw Claire’s eyes grow wide in surprise. “That’s not necessary. You and Catherine,” she smiled at Claire’s friend, “are enjoying the afternoon together. I don’t want to intrude.”
“You’re not intruding,” Catherine assured her.
“Certainly, you’re not. Come on in and have some tea with us.”
“That’s very kind of you,” Paula said, “but I should get home. Could you please tell me where I can find Mister Williams when I have time to talk to him?”
Claire told her where he lived then added, “You’re welcome to stop by for a visit any time you wish.”
“Thank you,” Paula replied then hurried off before they could try to talk her into having tea with them again.
Good. Now she knew who could make Perry another inkwell and if she was lucky, he’d never find out what happened.
THIRTEEN
Perry stared at the book in his hands. He couldn’t believe he was actually contemplating whether or not to read it. But being with Paula the previous night… He never imagined she could be so passionate. There was something different in the way she made love to him. It was a surprising blend of raw need and devoted love. He had no idea such a response from a lady was possible. And it had excited him.
Not that he hadn’t been excited before. Just being near her was enough to enrapture him. But he wondered if he could seduce her the same way she had seduced him. She had him naked and enjoying her with reckless abandon, for goodness’ sakes. He had no idea anyone could—or even should—make love outside the bedchamber. The possibilities enticed him to learn more, to think beyond what he had thought about marriage before she came into his life.
Though he didn’t want to give credence to anything Christopher thought was good, he would be lying if he didn’t admit that this book might hold some promise. He studied the cover again. It was a plain blue cover. There was nothing on it that testified to its contents except for the title, How to Pleasure a Lady. Paula had said he could touch her whenever and wherever he wanted. Perhaps he should try it. See where things led. See what he might do to please her.
He glanced at the closed door of his bedchamber to make sure no one was there to see him. Assured he was alone, he opened the book and began to read it.
“You don’t mind going with me tonight, do you?”
Paula turned from the small window of the carriage so she could face her husband. “I’d go anywhere with you, Perry.”
“While I appreciate that, I also remember how much you wanted to go to the country.”
“Well, you said Nate and Claire will be leaving in a couple days, and this is the last ball they’re going to. You should see your friends.”
He smiled and clasped her gloved hand. “That’s very sweet of you. I promise that we’ll leave soon. It won’t be long before it’ll be just you and me at Blackburn.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
Even more so now than ever. Her brother wouldn’t be at Blackburn. He’d be safely away from them, and she could relax…at least until next year when they returned to London. She was as trapped as she’d been before she married Perry. It’d only been because of her hasty—albeit failed—elopement with Lord Holloway that he practically imprisoned her in his home. She couldn’t go anywhere or do anything without his permission. He’d made it so that no one ever found out about her disgraceful behavior and for that she paid a heavy penance.
She closed her eyes and released her breath. And she was still paying it, except she’d get a reprieve while at Blackburn. She could think of nothing better. How she looked forward to the moment she and Perry left London!
She tightened her hold on Perry’s hand. “You do love me, don’t you?”
Smiling, he brushed aside a few strands of hair from the side of her face with his free hand. “I believe I told you that this morning.”
“I know but I like to hear it.”
He cupped her face in his hands. “I love you, Paula. I know it sounds foolish
, but I loved you from the moment I met you. And every day we’re together, I love you more.”
“How did I end up with someone as wonderful as you?”
“It was fate.”
“You think so?”
“After all the failures I’ve been through, it has to be. It seemed every time I took an interest in a lady, she ended up with someone else. Those were never meant to be. We, however, are.”
Blinking back tears, she smiled at him. “I’m glad I didn’t end up with anyone but you.” And that was the truth. When she was with him, all the pain in her past melted away as if it never happened. He made all things new, and if she had to go through all the pain again just to be with him, she’d gladly do it.
He lowered his head and kissed her.
The carriage came to a stop, ending their kiss before she was ready to part from him. Despite her disappointment, she smiled at him and accepted his arm. They entered the ballroom, and to her surprise, he offered to dance with her.
“I thought you didn’t like to dance because of your cane,” she replied, not sure she heard him right.
“It’d be a shame to be here with my wife and not share at least one dance with her. I know all the steps of every dance since I’ve been watching how they’re done for years.” He glanced at his cane. “I’ll probably be awkward though. If you don’t want to—”
“No!” She chuckled and led him to the area where other couples were getting ready to dance. “I want to dance with you.”
She curtsied and waited for the music to begin. He held his cane as the music played, and though he limped from time to time, she was surprised at how well he knew the steps. Sure, he’d told her he knew them, but knowing the steps and performing them were two separate things.
When the music ended, she got ready to tell him he did wonderfully but a familiar voice called out, “I don’t believe it. Lord I’ll-Never-Dance-Till-The-Day-I-Die actually danced!” They turned in time to see Christopher approach them. “That just goes to show how much of a miracle worker Paula is.” He bowed to her. “It’s always a pleasure to see you.”
“Thank you, but the dance was your cousin’s idea,” she replied.
“Well, that only reinforces my point. You are a miracle worker. Maybe next time I see him, he’ll be enjoying himself.”
“I enjoy myself just fine,” Perry said. “What are you doing here? I thought you and Agatha left London already.”
“I wanted one more opportunity to talk to Paula.” Christopher turned to her. “My lady, would you do me the honor of sharing a dance with me? I’d be delighted if you’d share your secrets with me.”
Paula stiffened for a moment. Secrets? What did he mean by that? Did her brother talk to him?
Perry sighed but patted the small of her back. “He won’t relent until he does. You might as well do it. I’ll find Nate.”
“Is it wrong for me to like talking to your wife?” Though he gasped, his amused tone betrayed his humor.
Perry rolled his eyes and muttered, “There’s one in every family,” before he left.
Bowing again, Christopher said, “Don’t mind him. He has no sense of humor.”
“He has a marvelous sense of humor,” she replied as the music began. She stepped in time to the melody and added, “I should thank you for introducing us. I couldn’t think of a better gentleman than him to marry.”
He almost tripped but quickly recovered. “Good heavens. You sounded just like Claire when she talks about her husband.”
“Do I?”
“Yes. She’s blind to a fault when it comes to him. Despite his many bad qualities, she refuses to see a single one.”
Hoping he’d forget to ask her about the secrets he had mentioned earlier, she pressed, “Surely, he has enough good qualities to make up for the bad.”
“When I say she’s blind, I mean she’s completely oblivious to all of his flaws.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing, I suppose. She’s married to him. She has to see the best in him or else she’ll fall into depression. I feel sorry for her. She’s such a nice lady, too.”
She laughed. Never before had she met anyone so dramatic. “I’m sure she’s fine.”
“She’s a brave soul. But what I wished to speak about was you.”
She mentally cursed herself for not thinking of another topic. She’d been so busy minding her steps that she forgot to think of another way to distract him, and to be fair, they couldn’t talk about Claire during the course of the entire dance. “Didn’t Agatha tell you what I said about my past? That I grew up in the country with my parents who are no longer living and how my brother brought me to London to find a suitable husband?”
“Oh, yes. She relayed all that boring nonsense. I don’t care about any of that. I want to know what your secret is. How do you get my cousin to take walks and dance? I’ve been trying to get him to do those things for years, but he never listened to me.”
It took her a moment to realize that the secret he’d been referring to had nothing to do with Lord Holloway. Relieved, she laughed again. Good. Her brother hadn’t talked to him. “There’s no secret to it. Perry’s an easy gentleman to please.”
“We can’t be talking about the same person.”
“I assure you, we are.”
“I refuse to believe it. Perry has never been satisfied with any noble thing I’ve done. Well, no. I take that back. There is one thing—and only one thing—I’ve done that’s made him happy. I got married to an honorable young lady. Had it not been for that, he wouldn’t have seen fit to compliment me at all.”
“Maybe that’s because you look for ways to upset him.”
“I don’t look for ways to upset him,” he replied, his tone indignant though he smiled.
“I think you do, and what’s more, I think you enjoy watching him squirm. It’s quite wicked of you,” she teased. “You’d do well to pay him a compliment sometime.”
“But if I did that, his whole view of me might be shattered. For years, I gave him something important to do. He needed a wayward lad to mold into the image of a proper gentleman. Can you imagine how bored he would have been had I not given him something worthwhile to do? And now that I am married and cause no scandals, he can see the fruits of his labor. He really should thank me. I gave him a legacy he can be proud of.”
She giggled and shook her head. “You’re a hopeless cause, aren’t you?”
“I’d say not. I treat my wife very well. You can ask her if you want. She’s right over there.” He motioned to Agatha who was dancing with a gentleman Paula didn’t recognize.
“She looks bored to me.”
“Of course she is. I’m not with her.”
She laughed again. Christopher was an easy gentleman to like. Though she could understand Perry’s frustration with him from time to time, she also knew that Christopher had turned out to be the kind of gentleman he had hoped for, even with the mischievous side to him.
The music ended and she curtsied, still chuckling as he bid her good luck with Perry and went to Agatha. She turned to leave the dance floor so she could find Perry when someone cupped her elbow in his hand. Facing the gentleman, all the laughter died from her throat. After four years and being in London all Season, she didn’t think she’d ever see him again.
“It’s been a long time, Paula,” Daniel whispered.
It took her a moment to get over her shock. “Lord Holloway,” she forced out, glancing around them to see if Stewart was somewhere nearby, watching them. If her brother saw who she was talking to, he’d find another way to blackmail her.
“Can I have this dance?”
Returning her gaze to him, she said, “No.”
Then she hurried away from him, her heart pounding fiercely in her chest. After all this time, why did he have to come back into her life? She’d fought so hard to get over him and now that she’d succeeded, he showed up? It was like a horrible nightmare. First Stewart insisted on bring
ing up the past. And now this? Hadn’t she already served her penance for her sins?
She made it to a wall and whirled around to make sure Daniel hadn’t followed her. He hadn’t. Good. At least that was something. But he was in London, and he came to this ball tonight. She swallowed and leaned the back of her head against the wall. What was she supposed to do? She had no idea he’d be here. If she had known, she would have done anything she had to in order to convince Perry to stay in their townhouse instead.
She scanned the room in hopes of finding Perry, but too many people were in her way. She was going to have to venture back into the heart of the room to find him, and right now she didn’t want to chance Daniel catching up to her.
Why? Why did he even want to talk to her? He was the one who married someone else. He was the one who broke her heart. And now that she’d found someone much better—someone she loved more than she’d ever loved him—he stepped right back into her life to ruin it.
No. He wouldn’t ruin it. She wouldn’t let him. She was Perry’s wife. She’d do whatever it took to make sure no one separated them. Maybe she’d have to pay Daniel off like she was paying Stewart. Daniel had needed money. He’d needed it so much that he abandoned her on their way to Gretna Green four years ago. He’d married a wealthy duchess and secured his fortune.
Maybe he gambled the money away? Maybe he heard she married a wealthy gentleman and wanted some of it in exchange for his silence? Well, whatever he wanted, she’d pay it. Anything to get him to leave her in peace so she could be with Perry. Maybe she should confront him and offer him money. She’d find a way to come up with enough so he’d leave her alone.
Releasing her breath, she pushed away from the wall. She could do this. As she took a step forward, a familiar figure headed in her direction. Glancing at her brother, she grimaced. This wasn’t what she needed. Not now. Not when everything was crashing in all around her.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he said when he reached her.
“Did you know Daniel is here?” she demanded, not putting it past him to know—and enjoy—such a thing.