Sashaying over to him, I work up all the courage I can possibly muster as I place a hand on his shoulder. He turns around to face me, and his eyes widen as chokes on a breath. I grab hold of his tie, pulling it so that it loosens, and then untying it. I push his jacket open, and he takes it off completely, but he doesn’t say a word. I start unbuttoning the buttons on his shirt, and before I get all the way down, I run my fingers lazily over the ridges of his chest and abs. His eyes dart to mine, and I give him a reassuring smile. He’s shaking his head no, but I’m nodding my head yes. Backing up until I’m sitting on the edge of the bed, I extend my index finger and give him a “come hither” motion.
He follows, staring at me with scores of questions lighting up all his features. When he’s in front of me, I take a steadying breath.
“Colin,” I say, reaching for his hand. Once our hands are intertwined, I bring his up to my face, closing my eyes and leaning into his touch. “I’m ready.”
He doesn’t say a single word as he drops to his knees before me. His arms circle around my waist, and his face buries against my stomach. I close my eyes as I recall earlier this year when he’d been in this exact position, and how different the circumstances were. Rather than wrapping my arms around him, I let my fingers find his hair, pulling it backward so that he’s forced to look up at me. When he does, the fire in his eyes is unmistakable.
“Are you sure about this, Nickayla?” he asks.
Everything that we’ve done and everything that we’ve said over the course of our relationship has led to this moment. I have two choices: I can continue running scared, never taking a chance on anyone or anything, or I can break free of my demons by finally fighting back against them.
I don’t want to fight with Colin. Hell, I don’t want to fight for Colin.
I want to fight beside Colin, always.
He said it best. Apart, we’re nothing. Together, we’re everything. And together we can do everything. There’s no reason to be afraid.
I nod, taking his hand. He arises slowly, his gaze locked on mine. He climbs on to the bed, placing a hand on the small of my back as he eases me backward. He’s now above me, and we’re pressed pelvis to pelvis. His hands roam my body in a slow, agonizing torture. I close my eyes as he plants a kiss there. He trails kisses along my abdomen and up to the valley of my breasts. I lean forward, ready to kiss him, ready to sate the burning desire within me, but he places a finger to my lips, not allowing me to move or say a word. A soft kiss grazes my neck, then my jawline, then the corner of my mouth.
“Baby, you are so beautiful,” he whispers, crashing his lips against mine as though he can’t hold back a second longer. I reach up, twining my fingers in his straight locks as I draw him closer to me. With a small moan, I open my mouth, allowing his tongue entrance. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”
I sit up, reaching behind me to unfasten my bra. When I let it drop, Colin’s lips descend upon mine once more, and then he pulls away, simply staring at me. He guides me back down, and he runs a hand through my hair as he fans it out on top of the pillow, and he sits up, straddling my hips as his eyes drink me in.
“If you want me to stop, baby, all you have to do is say the word,” he says.
“Don’t.”
He shakes his head. “I swear, Nickayla, just say—”
“Don’t stop,” I clarify. “I want this. I want you.”
He takes that as his signal to keep going, so I close my eyes. He runs his fingers up the inside of my thigh, and my back arches. A kiss lands on my hipbone, and then my belly, each of my breasts, my collarbone, my neck, my cheeks, and then finally, my lips.
“Open. I want you here.”
His tone is demanding as his lips crash into mine, sliding, feeling, taking, wanting, needing… I open my eyes just as his tongue touches the entrance to my mouth, and I open, allowing him in. My hands come up to wrap around him, but with one of his hands, he grabs the both of mine and moves them so they’re above my head. He sears me into place with just one look, and pure lust and desire builds within me. With a feather-light touch, his hand roams down my body, and his thumb hooks on the hem of my panties.
My heartbeat quickens beneath that touch, and his gaze locks on mine. Unblinkingly, he moves my panties over my hips with just one hand. His movements are slow, and he never breaks his stare, like he’s waiting for any indication that I’m not ready. But I am. With a touch of his hand on my lower back, I lift slightly, and he tugs my panties down my thighs, over my knees, and completely off. Holding them in his hand, he gives me a wickedly seductive grin before tossing them onto the floor. He unzips his pants, climbing off the bed and taking them completely off. He resumes his place on top of me in just a matter of seconds.
At the sight of him, I bite my lips and my hands start to tremble. As Colin leans over me, his hands roam up the length of my arm and one of them slides over mine until our fingers are twined together. He places a kiss on my forehead, and I close my eyes as a tear falls at the tender movement.
Every hair on my body is standing on end, my heart racing with each touch of his skin against mine. His touch does to me what I never thought was possible. His touch, feather light, graceful, and pure, replaces the only ones my mind has ever known. His hands aren’t rough, clammy, aggressive, taking what he wants. They’re gentle, soothing, tender, as he erases the bad memories and leaves new ones in their wake. They take only what I am willing to give him. Everything.
Kyle’s hands become his hands, Kyle’s unwelcome kisses become Colin’s feverish ones, Kyle’s prodding touch becomes Colin’s healing touch, burning into my heart and soul so that I’ll never forget this experience, never forget this day.
It’s now when I see my wall, the one I worked so hard to build and keep upright, tumble to the ground one brick at a time. I watch myself scramble out of the tower I’d erected, scars at the ready, giving myself over to Colin completely so that he can heal me once and for all.
With my free hand, I reach up and grab hold of his hair. I pull him down to me. Placing my hand on the side of his face, I gaze at the man who loves me like no one ever has, into the eyes that see me like none ever have. Someday, I’ll break down his barriers, and I’ll heal his scars, too. Someday, it’ll be my turn to be the strong one, the one to tear through his heart and put the pieces of him with the pieces of me until the both of us are whole.
Colin gives me a crooked smile, and I damn near come undone at the sight of that alone.
“I love you,” I whisper to him, knowing that the moment has finally come.
“I love you,” he echoes, a whisper over my mouth before he leans down and presses a kiss to my lips.
…
Colin’s eyes are closed, but he’s not sleeping. He’s on his back, and I’m somehow nestled between his legs, my head on his chest. One of his hands is playing in my hair, and the other simply rests to the side of us.
His chest rises and falls, and I listen to his heart as it beats beneath my ear.
We made love twice, before I was too spent both emotionally and physically to do much of anything else. Both times were slow, sweet, innocent, and Colin made sure that every moment was as special as the moments leading up to it. Before I gave myself to him, I wasn’t sure how I would feel afterward. Now, though, I feel surprisingly whole. I feel lighter. Like I can conquer the world as long as Colin’s by my side.
Colin’s breathing steadies beneath my ear, and I’m almost certain that he’s finally fallen asleep. But then, his arm comes up to drape around my waist. His free hand snakes along my body until it reaches mine, which is laid on his bare chest. He laces our fingers together, and for the first time since he put it in place, I admire my ring.
The platinum band that now sits on my ring finger is constructed with a thin, tapered band. Nestled directly in the center is a half-carat, single round diamond. It’s beautiful in every single definition of the word.
“How are you, Nickayla?” he ask
s, his voice thick with emotion.
I turn my head upward as I gaze at him. His cool green gaze locks me into place, and I admire him in stunned silence. I exhale, giving him a lazy smile.
“I’m grand,” I say. “I don’t know what that was, or why I waited so long to do it. But I’m so glad I did it with you. I couldn’t have pictured a more perfect prom, a more perfect proposal, or a more perfect first time with a more perfect man. I love you so much.”
I can see the emotions brewing behind those green eyes of his, and he lets out a ragged breath. His hand that was in my hair comes down to rest atop my waist, and he nuzzles his face into my hair.
“Speaking of prom…do you want to go back?”
I shake my head, laughing.
“’Course not. I’m so exhausted, I couldn’t imagine moving from this place, ever.”
We lie in each others’ arms, neither of us able to move or speak. I close my eyes and start to listen to the sound of Colin’s heartbeat again when he lifts my hand up to his face. I look up to watch what he’s doing, and he’s just staring at my ring, much like I was doing before.
“It’s beautiful, Colin,” I tell him.
He looks down at me. “Yeah?” He pauses. “I’ve saved up my salary since I started working at Little Sicily so I could buy you that ring.”
I cock an eyebrow. His statement strikes me as odd. He has loads of money. He’s not hurting financially. With his grandfather’s will, and being next in line to head up Westwick Enterprises, Colin should never have to want for anything—or work for anything. The will stated that once he was eighteen, he was to inherit his grandfather’s fortune, and, should he wish, he had the opportunity to run his grandfather’s business. W.E., it took me a while to figure out, is pretty much an enormous company with focuses on architecture. Colin’s uncle Benson also opened up a few bed and breakfasts in North Carolina, and the company is highly successful. Now that he can touch his inheritance, I wonder why he bothered to save, when it would take no more than a phone call for him to get whatever he needed.
“Why?” I ask.
“I didn’t want to touch my grandfather’s money for your ring. I wanted to work for it. I wanted to know I put my own blood, sweat, and tears into earning the money to afford it. It’s no big deal.”
At that, I sit up, grabbing the flat sheet and wrapping it around my torso. I hold it so it covers me, because I want him to be able to focus on my face and the words I’m saying the minute they leave my mouth, not anything else. I lean back on my heels, resting atop Colin’s legs. His questioning gaze travels from my legs, up toward the sheet, at my hand holding it tightly against my body, and up to my face.
His words fill me with an immense sense of pride. He didn’t have to do any of that. He doesn’t have to work if he doesn’t want to. But he chooses to, to keep himself grounded despite his newfound fortune. He knows the value of hard work, and that makes me admire him. He may be young, but I know already that he’s going to be an excellent CEO of Westwick Enterprises.
I want him to know how proud I am of him, how much I admire him for who he is, when he has had every reason in the world to be a totally different kind of human being.
“Colin, don’t say it’s not a big deal. It’s a huge deal. If you chose to, you would never have to work another day in your life because of your Granddad’s inheritance. But you decided to work for this?” I hold my left hand up, showing it to him. “That’s huge. And I love you for it.”
His hands extend, and he pulls me down so I’m flush against him once more. Plunging his hands into my hair, he leans down to give me a kiss.
Being with Colin has always been as easy as breathing. Tonight, being with him came to me just as naturally as my own heartbeat. I have no control over how I feel about him, or how I feel when I’m with him. He’s my reason for breathing. He’s my heart. He’s my home. He’s my everything. And with all he’s done for me tonight, it’s easy to see that he feels the same way about me.
The grip he has on my body tightens, and he presses his lips to the top of my head. “Nickayla,” he says.
I’m so tired, I’m surprised I can muster enough strength to mutter, “Mmm?”
“I can’t…keep my eyes open.”
I laugh, completely surprised that he hasn’t fallen asleep before now. I’m exhausted, and have been since we finally laid down to recuperate. He sounds how I feel. It’s so fucking adorable, though, and it takes all I have in me to keep from turning over and starting round three with him.
I disentangle my limbs from his, rolling over so that I’m lying on the side of him. He glares at me, like he wants to know why I’ve moved. I grab hold of his arm, draping it over my waist. He takes my cue and turns onto his side. He rests his head between the valley of my breasts, and I watch as he closes his eyes. I place my hand in his hair, running my fingers through it because I know how much he loves that. He emits a moan, and then he gazes up at me momentarily.
“We have almost the same heartbeat,” he muses. “Nice.”
Before I know it, we’re both knocked out.
Thirty One.
“I love you, Nickayla Quinn,” Colin says, taking my hand and kissing the engagement ring that now rests on my ring finger. Instead of letting it go, though, he holds my hand in his lap as he continues to drive.
Checkout was an hour ago, and Colin took me to breakfast before we hit the road. The last thing that he wanted was for us to be hungry today once we got back home, because once we hit Harlow, we’ll be on the “We’re Engaged” tour, telling all our friends and family. I’m excited to tell everyone, particularly my friends, because I know they’ll be happy for us after the turmoil of this year.
“I love you, Colin Westwick,” I reply, leaning over and kissing him on the cheek. I stare over at him, at the smile the seems like it’s permanently etched on his face ever since last night, and I sigh. “I’m excited to go home. To tell everyone our news.”
He raises an eyebrow, merging into the left lane of the street. That eyebrow quirk is one of the sexiest things he does. “Oh, yeah? You eager to let people know that you’re spoken for?”
“I’ve been spoken for from the moment I met you. But yeah, I’m pretty anxious to show off my shiny, new fiance.”
He laughs, and I close my eyes to revel in the sound. I could listen to him laugh every day for the rest of my life.
It’s so amazing how statements like that have changed since Colin and I got engaged. Suddenly, the rest of my life isn’t so far away. It’s right now. It’s right here. It’s sitting in the car with me, singing along at the top of his lungs to We Are the Champions. It’s nestled on my finger. It’s in the beat in my heart, in the smile on Colin’s face, in the pep that was in his step after we made love for the first time. It’s staring me in the face. In two weeks, we’ll be graduating high school. In two months, we’ll be driving away from Harlow for good, and headed for college. We’ll be planning a wedding. Working. Being adults and in love. Who knows, two years from now, we’ll either be married, or getting ready to be. The rest of our lives is right now, and everything we do today, tomorrow, and from this point on will shape everything we’ll ever be.
My heart begins to race, and as a result, I tense up and my hands go completely clammy. They start sweating profusely, and I struggle to yank my hand out of Colin’s grip. However, that proves to be entirely pointless, because he only clasps my hands harder when he feels me trying ot pull away.
“What’s wrong? Are you nervous?” The look on his face that follows those two questions is enough to tear my heart in two.
“A bit. About everyone’s reactions. Especially my dad’s.”
When I turn to look at Colin to try and gauge his reaction, a smug smirk is the very last thing I expect to see. He drives with one hand on the steering wheel, and his crooked smile is knowing, and that makes me curious.
Before I have the chance, though, he explains. “I’m not worried about your dad in the slightest.�
�
“Why not?” I ask.
“Because I already talked to him about the engagement. I asked for his permission to even ask to marry you.”
Immediately, my right hand comes up to clutch my heart as I close my eyes. I try to push the tears from my eyes, to hold my emotions behind the levee. I don’t want it to break right here. There are no words in the English language to describe what I’m feeling right now. I feel everything ten times stronger than I would have before, and before I know it, I’m crying. I bite my lip and then I turn to face Colin.
“Why would you do that?”
“Nickayla, I asked for his permission to take you on a date, over a year ago. Did you really think I was going to propose to you without his blessing? Your dad means the world to you. He’s the only person whose approval you don’t crave…you need his approval like you need a heartbeat. If he had said no, I wouldn’t have asked you. His opinion means everything to you, therefore it means everything to me to have it. I would do anything for you, because I love you. I always will.”
What happens next happens in the blink of an eye.
Colin puts his blinker on, merging into the turning lane. I place a hand on the side of his face before kissing his cheek. He waits for the turning light to turn green. When it does, he pulls off and proceeds to turn into the street. Squealing tires come from somewhere near us and Colin’s arm darts in front of me as if he can stop whatever’s about to happen. A car comes speeding into the intersection just as we’re turning, and slams right into me before everything goes black.
…
Colin
The bloodcurdling scream that came out of Nickayla will haunt me for the rest of my life.
However long that is.
When I open my eyes, all I see is her head, bent forward, blood trickling slowly down her smooth, porcelain skin. All I feel is her hand, suddenly limp in mine. The seatbelt has held her in place, thankfully, but that didn’t do shit to protect her fragile body from the air bag that deployed. Despite the blood on her face and her unconscious form, she looks perfect. Her lip gloss, the peach kind that tastes like Heaven when I kiss her and she’s wearing it, is still intact, her skin still perfectly polished, and not a hair on her head is out of place. I think that’s the worst part.
Almost Everything (Nickayla Quinn Trilogy Book 2) Page 26