by Horst, John
But it would not do for them to stay there. They ate breakfast and listened to the man as the pretty assistant moved about, completing various tasks. The man held court and lectured them on being bandits and on the various dangers they would encounter. The girls sat, wide-eyed, as they’d not considered the many things the man spoke of to them. They could not begin to imagine how much danger was involved and it made Maria wish she’d never done any of it.
The assistant sensed it and moved up behind Maria’s chair. She stroked her head gently and Maria got a flutter in her stomach like she’d never known. She sat, frozen. She didn’t want the woman to stop stroking her head. She started to ask why they couldn’t stay here forever when the man started speaking again.
“You two could go up north.” He lit a cigarette he’d just finished rolling and then regarded the assistant who was becoming too attached to the girls. The fence was not an old man and he didn’t want the assistant distracted with young girls. Besides, he’d grown up in a house full of girls and didn’t want that right now. He continued. “With the money you two have, you could go up to Texas or even Arizona or California and live well for a while. No one will try to find you.”
Maria could see it in his eyes. She and Juana were not wanted or welcome here. She glanced over at the pretty woman, now keeping busy with something at the stove. She looked back at the man smoking. It wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t like the mean man at the village, and he wasn’t like the rurale, Pendejo Pedro, and he wasn’t like Sanchez. He was just a man who did not want to take in two girls and she couldn’t fault him for that.
“Gringos are all assholes.” Juana looked at the man and then at Maria. She was pleased with herself for such a bold declaration. She sat smugly finishing the food on Maria’s plate.
“What are gringos?”
Juana laughed and looked at the man. “Maria is from the country. I think she lived under a rock. She knows almost nothing.”
The man nodded, knowingly. “The Americanos, the ones up north. They’re not all assholes, just most of them.”
The pretty assistant came back and wanted to know what they were talking about. She blew air between pursed lips. “No, this is not a good idea. They would not do well up there. They have no English and they are too dark. The Americanos don’t like Indians. Look at what happened with Custer.”
The man ignored her and stood up. “Well, maybe so.” He was not really interested in what they would do next, as long as they were not living with him. He wandered outside and left the three of them alone.
The assistant took them down to the shoreline and they swam in the big water for the first time in their lives. Maria loved the saltiness and they stayed in the surf for the rest of the day. The pretty woman watched them.
“You two are very lucky young girls.”
They stopped and looked at her. They wondered if she meant because of the money and it was if she read their minds.
“You have each other and that is a good thing.”
They pulled themselves out of the water and sat down next to the assistant. She had something to tell them and they respected her. She was a kind young woman and they wanted to please her.
“What will you do?”
Maria spoke up, automatically, before Juana could open her mouth. She was not convinced that Juana had given up on the brothel idea and didn’t want her to tell the assistant about it. “We’re going to get goats.”
“I see.” She liked this idea. Maybe they’d go into a village and out of the path of the bad men. She continued. “I want you two to remember some things.”
“Yes?” She had their attention.
“You both have a big fortune now, much more than children should have. Guard it. Don’t flaunt what you have. Don’t buy fancy things: clothes, or jewelry or even guns. Don’t show the money you have when in public, don’t eat in fancy places.”
Juana thought this very silly. “Why have so much money if you can’t enjoy it?”
“Because it wasn’t really for you to have, little one. This is not your money, really. It is not money for a poor Indian to have, and you will be found out. You’ll be found out by the rurales or other bandits.” She looked at her hands and then out to the sea. “My girls, you’ve known many hard things, but the worst of all the hard things is not having enough to eat. You know this.”
Maria nodded solemnly.
“You now have enough money to ensure that you will eat well for many years. You have enough money to live in a comfortable home for many years. Do this, girls, and keep quiet. Be invisible.”
Juana looked up at her. “Be invisible?”
“Yes, invisible. Don’t attract attention. When you are old enough, perhaps in six years or so, find men. Find good hardworking men, not bandits. Put the money to good use. Get a farm or buy horses or cattle,” she smiled at Maria, “or goats. Make certain your family never goes hungry.” She stood up and stretched her back into a beautiful arch. Maria had not, until now, realized just how beautiful the woman was. She now knew and also knew that she was a good person. She was happy to have met her and resolved to take her advice.
“How long may we stay here with you?”
“Not long.” She pointed in the direction of the house up on the hill with her head. “He’s not a bad sort, but he doesn’t want you here. No offense intended, but he likes to be alone.”
Maria suddenly had a thought and it made her nervous. “He is good to you?”
The assistant smiled. She knew what Maria meant and it upset her and made her sad to know that the child had knowledge of such horrible things. She put a hand to Maria’s face. “He is, child. He’s good to me.”
That night they lay in bed together but were not sleepy. They’d eaten well now for three days and Maria was no longer exhausted all the time. The sheets smelled good and she hoped that it would be okay to buy a bed and sheets with the money. The assistant didn’t say anything about that, but surely buying a good bed and sheets would not be flaunting. She thought it would be okay. She looked over at Juana who was looking up at the ceiling, forming words with her mouth.
She smiled at what the assistant said and felt happy to be with Juana. Maybe they’d be friends forever. She didn’t see why not. She spoke automatically. “Juana, we should leave tomorrow, but I don’t know where we should go.”
Juana stopped forming the words and looked over at Maria. “I have an idea. Back near the town but outside of it, there’s an old settlement with caves where the old people used to live many years ago. No one lives there anymore and we could live in the caves. There’s good grass and things up there. I think goats could live there.”
Maria liked this idea. She could get goats from where she used to live. There was a man who would sell them goats and if it was close to the town, it would not be far from her village. “Juana, that nice lady, she was right, you know.”
“I know.”
“I know you like nice things and I know you want to buy good food and things.”
“It’s okay. She’s right. Anyway,” she turned on her side to face Maria. “in a couple years, I’ll be bigger and then I’ll just look like a rich whore. I can dress and wear what I want and go where I want. No one will know it was Sanchez’s money or from Sanchez’s things. They’ll think I made it on my back.”
Maria suddenly felt ill. She didn’t want Juana to be a whore. Without thinking she began to speak. “Juana?”
“What?”
“Don’t talk about that anymore. Don’t talk about being a whore.”
Chapter IV: Going Home
They were on the road and Juana looked at Maria a little doubtfully. She looked down at her peasant clothes and was disappointed. The dress she got from Sanchez’s shop was so much prettier. They rode along in silence, both thinking the same thoughts. Maria was sad to ride the burro. It was a nice burro and it listened to her well, but she wanted—dreamed of—a beautiful horse. She even had it picked out in her mind. It would have a fancy
saddle with a big wooden horn and conchos all over it.
It was better this way, of course. The big prize was secreted in a pack under Maria’s seat; a pile of money, a king’s ransom. The fence and his assistant took good care of them and they knew doing it this way was right, it just seemed so ordinary. But they had three days to travel and they were, for all intents and purposes—thanks mostly to the lady—quite invisible.
Juana was chatty. She rode up next to Maria and pulled out the cross on the necklace around her neck. “It was nice of her to give us these.” Maria had one to match.
“Yes it was.” She wondered at it. It was a pretty pewter cross with a little man attached. Maria pulled hers up and looked at it as well.
“You don’t even know what it is, do you, Maria?”
Maria looked on. “No.” She didn’t mind. It didn’t bother her when Juana spoke of Maria’s ignorance anymore. Juana wasn’t being mean and Maria knew that she wasn’t stupid, just ignorant. Ignorance could be cured by knowledge and she was resolved to learn many things. She had a good mind.
“That’s Jesus.” She nodded her head like a donkey when she said his name.
“Why do you do that?” She mimicked Juana’s nod.
“You’re supposed to do that whenever you say Jesus’s name.” She nodded again and Maria found it very amusing. She nodded to herself and it felt a little silly.
“So, teach me of Jesus.”
Juana laughed. “I cannot believe someone doesn’t know of Jesus.” She grinned and moved her head from side to side and Maria realized that she’d forgotten to nod. But all this nodding would likely knock one off balance and she didn’t want Juana falling from her burro, so she didn’t say anything to her about forgetting the nod.
“He is the son of God and his mother is Maria, like you. But she’s the Virgin Maria, not like you.”
“Can you not talk of that?” Maria felt sad when Juana brought it up and it made her feel funny and hurt a little down below.
“I’m sorry, Maria.” And Juana was. She’d been so casual about the act for so long, living around the whores, that she didn’t realize how hurtful it was to talk of such things, especially to a person like Maria, who’d been abused. Juana had seen many bad things in her young life and known much depravity, but she’d never been abused.
She tried to change the subject away from the virginal properties of the Virgin Maria. “So, God and Maria had Jesus and he is the son of God and he was made into a man, but he was still God and he did a lot of nice things and then he died for our sins by being nailed to a cross.”
“Oh, that’s terrible.”
“Yes. You can see it at any church. They have big statues of Jesus nailed to the cross and he got stabbed in the breast and he had a crown made from thorns and it was pressed into his head so the blood ran in his eyes. It was really quite terrible.”
“Why’d they do such a thing to him? Was he a bandit?”
“No, no. He was good and nice.”
“And they did that to him?” Maria was confused and wondered if maybe she didn’t want to wear the crucifix anymore. She didn’t know if she wanted to be named after the poor woman Maria whose son was so terribly abused.
She didn’t want to talk about it anymore and looked off in the distance. She pointed at some high hills a few miles away. “Let’s camp there.” She looked up at the sun and reckoned they’d be there with an hour of daylight to spare.
She was pleased that they had good food to eat and she wouldn’t have to hunt. She didn’t have a rifle now because the assistant told her it would not be a good idea. It would not be normal for young girls to have a rifle so they didn’t keep one. She did have a little six shooter tucked under her rebozo but that was supposed to be used only if she had to defend herself or Juana. The assistant told her that she shouldn’t fire the gun as that would also make them not invisible.
Maria thought a lot about the assistant. She was so good to them. Maria decided to start remembering every person who was ever good to her. She’d remember them and keep them in her mind and someday she’d go and visit every one of them and do them some kindness. She’d buy them a gift and visit them.
So far, she had the nice woman with the mean husband in her village, the whore with the yellow hair in Nuevo Casas Grandes, Juana, of course, and now the assistant. This made her feel good.
And there was the man. The fence. He was good to them. She didn’t know why she didn’t think of him right away and she thought it was queer that she didn’t think of him as nice. Maybe she’d known so few men who were nice that she didn’t think of any man as being nice. But they could be nice. He was and she thought she’d add him to the list.
It wasn’t really his fault that he didn’t want them to stay there, by the beautiful sea with the beautiful lady assistant. She thought about that some more. Well, actually, it was his fault, but he was not to blame. There was a difference in that. He had his own life to lead. He couldn’t take in every poor person or child. That would not do. So, yes, she would add him to her list.
Then she had another thought. Should she have a list of people who did her wrong? Should she get back at them? Should she take revenge? That didn’t seem a good use of her time and she resolved that she would not have such a list.
Anyway, the only ones who would be on it were the mean man from the village and the pendejo, Pedro, the rurale. But they were just rude to her. Of course, had he lived, Sanchez would definitely be on the list. But he was dead and she wasn’t sad at all about that. It actually made her feel better to know he was dead. He could never make her dreamy and sleepy and do that to her again and, more importantly, he could never do that to a child again. That was the best part of it and she was again pleased with her performance. She was pleased with her rock throwing ability.
All this thinking got her to the hills. It was time to stop. Maria pulled up ahead of Juana and then turned to the south. She rode a ways until they hit a gully and were out of sight, invisible.
She slid off her burro and Juana settled the beasts down as Maria made a fire. She then took their treasure and hid it some distance from the camp. If anyone attacked them, they’d likely take the burros and leave them alone. At least they’d have their money. She thought of this on her own and was pleased with herself for being so careful and clever. She kept her gun tucked in her rebozo. She had it with her always, even when she was asleep. No one would get them as long as she had her gun.
They ate and settled down under the blankets and stared up at the clear night sky. The stars were so tightly packed together and brightly lit that it almost hurt their eyes. Maria was feeling very happy now.
“Tell me the bad words, Juana.”
Juana was pleased at the thought. “Okay, let’s see.” She concentrated. “What do you want to know?”
“I don’t know. How about pendejo?”
“A pendejo is a big jerk, a dumb ass, an asshole.”
“Oh.”
“What do you want to know next?” Juana felt important. She was the great professor now.
“I don’t know any others.”
“Hmm, let’s see.” She stroked her chin. “How about cagada?”
“That’s shit.” Maria was pleased with herself for knowing cagada.
“Yes.” She smiled. “Okay, how about mierda?”
“That’s shit, too.”
“How about hijo de tu puta madre?”
Maria did not know.
“Son of a bitch.” Juana liked that one. “How about boca de pedo?”
Maria did not know.
“Fart mouth.”
“Really?”
Juana laughed out loud. “Yes, fart mouth, especially when someone has stinky breath. You call them boca de pedo.”
Maria laughed now. “That’s not nice. Some people cannot help if they have stinky breath. I wouldn’t ever say that to someone.”
Juana grinned and snuggled under the covers. She was getting sleepy. She rested her head on
Maria’s shoulder. “You are too nice, Maria. Too nice.” She slipped off to sleep.
By midday they could see the hills off in the distance that held the cave dwellings where the old people lived. Maria was happy as they were far away from the town and far enough away from her village that no one from there would ever run into her.
Juana was riding steadily along, dozing, not paying attention when Maria saw him. He was alone and on a horse sitting on a rise about halfway between them and the caves. She watched him but didn’t say anything to Juana. When they were hidden from his view by another little rise she slid off her burro and let the animal plod along following his companion carrying Juana. She ran up alongside her burro and pulled the bag of money from under the blanket. She scurried off into the brush and hid it there.
Juana was brought out of her trance by the man’s deep voice commanding her.
“Alto.”
She stopped and looked at him. He was an older man with dark skin and long moustaches. He wore a rurale’s coat and striped vaquero pants. On his head was a smallish sombrero made of straw with a fancy band all around it. He had a six shooter stuck in his pants. He did not have a gun belt or holster and his knife was smallish and stuck in the top of his boot.
Juana looked him in the eye and waited.
“Where’s the other one?”
Juana looked behind her and saw only the burro. Maria was gone but Juana pretended to not be surprised. She looked back at the man and shrugged her shoulders. She did not speak.
“Don’t shrug your shoulders. Where is she?” He was angry and rode close to Juana, rode around her and the other burro, surveying them, calculating what they’d be worth. He didn’t wait for her answer but instead ordered her off the beast. Juana complied.
The man dismounted and grabbed Juana by the forehead. He pushed her face all around to look her over. He looked down at her poor dress and grunted, then turned his attention to her animals. They were good burros. He dug around the blankets and found her food and water. He took the bags of food and threw them over his saddle skirt and then turned to her once again.