by Pam Uphoff
After dinner, more boys started drifting in, and they all wound up outside, an unorganized and uncertain gaggle. He was shocked by the number of still-high boyish voices. He hadn't thought the wizards had been castrating their babies.
"Where are you from Dydit? Can you tell us about the Goat Wizards?" Jin started the ball rolling.
"Scoone. I was born in the town of High Top about eight hundred years ago. Both my parents were wizards—or at any rate my parents of record. Scooner high society—all wizards—had a nasty little social game. They called it birding, it was small scale teleportation—travel they call it these days. The wizard wives, once they'd produced a couple of sons for the inheritance, would try to magically steal semen from wizards more powerful than their husbands." That brought out a nervous titter. "And young male wizards would try to magically inseminate the wives of the more powerful wizards. The older wizards spent most of their time protecting their assets, and heaven help the wife of one who couldn't protect herself."
He let the snickering reactions quiet down. "So, since my mother had two sons and a daughter older than me, I don't actually know who my father was." He shrugged. "That's the way it was back then, and nobody thought anything of it. And then at ten, any of us who were showing magical promise would be apprenticed to a wizard of as high a rank as our parents could finagle. And we'd castrate ourselves." I think I'll leave out the part about splitting it with our Masters for dinner.
When that reaction died down, he explained. "There is a last bit of brain growth in the late teens and early twenties. Without testosterone the brain develops the ability to gather power and use it. With the male hormones, it can just barely hold any power." There were a lot of nods through the crowd. Someone had explained this to them before.
"There was this girl, Rustle Neverdoubt. She told us about it, and said she could do something else that might work." Jin's youngest, Aero, spoke up.
"Ah," Dydit nodded. "That explains all the high voices. Yes. A whole lot better. The oldest of the Rip Crossing Goat Boys are getting quite strong. They're twenty-two now." He gathered his thoughts. "Well. Scoone. As you might imagine, it was a rather poisonous place, the back stabbing tended to be magical, and everyone hated the Tyrant Wizard Nihility. So, a whole bunch of the other factions decided to join forces to take him down. Now sixty-to-one sounds pretty impressive, but in fact the Tyrant took out the leaders of the main factions, the seven strongest wizards, in a single long afternoon of magical battle all over the damn city. I was still an apprentice, at twenty-three I'd regrown all my parts and thought I was hot stuff. Young men who had to get someone else to help them regrow their nads were considered weaklings, failures. Anyhow, I was apprenticed to the leader of the conspiracy, and to keep him from using me and my magical abilities, I got taken out too.
"And the way Tyrant did it was to ensorcel us with a whole constellation of spells, the top one of which was a transformation spell. We were all turned into goats. Big, black, nasty, goats.
"The rest of the conspirators managed to get a chain spell on the Tyrant, and then they wrapped him up in more spells. One of the spells was a doozy. It would turn him into a drooling moron. But it started really slowly, so he could feel his intelligence leaking away, bit by bit.
"Then they threw him in the dungeon to enjoy watching his brains leak away, and got down to splitting the spoils and fighting with each other.
"Before the 'stupid' spell had time to get a hold on him, the Tyrant escaped. But instead of jumping back into the fight, he quit. He just turned and walked away from it all. And he took his eight black goats with him. The people of Scoone were so enraged by the way the new tyrants ruled that they revolted and killed the rest of the wizards." And themselves, when the city burned.
That got a fair stir from the kids.
"Now, some time before all that, some of the gods had decided that interfering with people's lives was harmful, not helpful, and they'd withdrawn to a beautiful little valley, the far side of the mountains. The Tyrant Wizard walked all the way there with his goats, to ask the gods to remove the spells from him. But they couldn't. The gods are powerful, but not much more powerful than the most powerful wizard. And they tend to study the creation of things, not destruction or magical battle. They could not break the spells put on the Tyrant by sixty of the most powerful wizards in the World.
"So the Tyrant sank down into imbecility, and he and his Black Goats herded sheep. For. Eight. Centuries." He let them think about that much time for a long moment. "Then, in the last full up war with Auralia, eighty something years ago, the other magic users, the witches and mages, were mostly killed.
"A few refugees, four witches and two mages and their wives, found the gods' valley. They were safe there, and raised families and had very little to do with the outside World.
"Now, the Wizards of Scoone were, umm, dandies. They did things artistically, with fancy flourishes, showing off, you know?" Nods all around. "They didn't realize that deflowering virgins was a useful, but crude and random, method of breaking spells. Until the imbecilic sheep herder who used to be the most powerful wizard in the World fell in love with a young witch, and won her heart and body." Close enough for a fairy tale. "The Tyrant breaking his stupid spell got them thinking about breaking their own spells. The Tyrant was no longer an imbecile, but he was still chained. The Chain spell contains magic, prevents the power from flowing in, or out, so spells have no force behind them. Fortunately the valley was fresh out of virgins, and the Tyrant was paying attention to what they were doing, so the goat wizards had to wait for their chance." Oh, yeah, he had their attention. "Now, I'd really like to skip a whole bunch of really embarrassing details. But I suppose you deserve the whole tale. Umm, briefly, there was a party. Everybody got drunk. Including the Tyrant. So the goats found two young girls, just turned sixteen, and their boyfriends, who were even younger . . . Well, three of the goats freed themselves of the spell controlling them, and the head goat also broke the goat spell. They ran off and caused some problems, and next thing you know the Church of Ba'al is organizing a small Army to burn this village to the ground, goats and witches included."
"Now gods . . . gods are strange people. They don't think about things the way we do, their memories are full of holes and . . . well, despite anything, they are people. Very powerful and dangerous people, when they go bad. And Ba'al was bad. And weird. One thing the worshipers often did was take vows of chastity. So when a hundred of these men showed up to fight, well, there were quite a few virgins among them."
"The villagers, gods, witches, mages, the wizard tyrant, four hundred stampeding sheep, and five goats who stopped to rape every virgin soldier they could find . . . Well, it wasn't your usual battle." Giggles from the audience. "In the end all the goats escaped. Now Maleth—the head goat—stuck around Ash, wanting to take revenge on the Tyrant, and got killed by the Inquisitor General of the bigger army Ba'al sent next.
"The other six wizards ran off, and Captain Genero can tell you more about what they did than I can. I ran off the other direction, and the Tyrant tracked me down and said that since Maleth was dead, and couldn't make me do things, I was free and removed all rest of the spells. I wound up going back to Ash with him, and learning proper wizarding. I'm sort-of-married to a witch, we have three children, Rustle is the eldest, and has, as you know, worked out some ways around the castration, for young wizards."
"Can you take it off?"
"Yes. I'd recommend you all wait until you're older though. Twenty-two, twenty-three, something like that." Dydit shrugged. "It is your choice. I understand how you feel about it, the other boys are bragging about girlfriends, shaving, got deep voices and all that. But in the next three or four years you can hold power in your hands." He cupped his hands and gathered a ball of light. "Will you be a strong enough wizard for it to be worth a few more years of teasing? I think so, but that's something you need to decide for yourselves.
"I'm going to drop down to Lucky Strike, an
d help set up a patrol head-quarters for the Army, make some other deliveries, then most likely I'll be back. Or you can go to Ash, or to Rip Crossing, where our Goat Boys—both male and female, by the way—have moved, along with some other people from Ash, including some witches, if you've any girls in the area that think they might have power." That brought a faint stir from the outskirts of the crowd. "Wizards collect power from Fire. We're fairly powerless at night. Meet me here in the morning, and I'll show you some basic gathering techniques. You'll have about a month to practice, to think it over, then I'll be back."
And then you'll have a bit over a year to get trained up for the End of the World.
Chapter Twenty-eight
1374 Summer Solstice
Ash
"A mother of twins needs a more civilized venue to recover in." Rustle told the new mother. "Not to mention Verse and Whoop want to be further away from the ruins. We can take the corridors to Ash, and live in the Tavern for awhile."
Ask looked relieved. "I thought I had plenty of time to get back there before . . . " She beamed down at her double armful of babies. "And this way you can get more lessons with gods and wizards."
"And Verse and Whoop can get some Half Moon training." Rustle stepped out to explain the plan to the others, and found them already packed.
The Rip Crossing witches were promptly invited to join the Mt. Frost Pyramid's Solstice celebration. Whoop and Verse walked up with the rest of the Half Moon witches. Carrying a light-weight folded metal frame attached to one end of a corridor with them.
Ask, two weeks after delivering twins, had refused to even think of the almost two week hike. And Rustle stayed behind to experiment with manipulating corridors. It was possible to pull one corridor through another, and another, and another . . . then giving it a good shake to knock it loose and have it snap into the shortest route. All without damaging the original corridors. Harry huffed and hurummed, then helped her set up a direct route, Ash to New Tokyo. "I didn't know you could do things like that with the corridors. The possibilities for setting up new routes . . . " He stomped off, muttering.
The Auld Wulf just laughed and let Xen and his three pups show him through the new corridor.
Rustle and Ask swapped grins, and they popped through Whoop's corridor to join the witches just one day's walk from the summit.
"Cheating." Answer looked at Ask's twins, and softened a bit. "But it's good to have everyone here."
With two triads of Full Moons, Rustle held down a side of the spire by herself. Below her, Ask, Whoop, and Verse were together. Ask sang the song of the new mother, Happy sang the Grandmother's song . . . it was a lovely night. Rustle stayed a bit remote from the other witches, ignored their whispers and glances. Stopped Whoop when she turned to confront someone who'd whispered something about a Black Widow.
"It doesn't matter any more. Remember the beauty of the night, and let the rest of it just . . . not touch you."
Ask snorted. "You can do that. We're a bit more ordinary, and their stupidity hurts."
"Bah. You guys ought to go off and socialize. Look at all the kids, let's see. The three year olds are Cost's and Zenith's, and they both look a lot like Havi for some odd reason." They all snickered. "The two year olds are Xanthic's and Ultra's right? Then the toddlers. You two had babies last year, plus Swish . . . Hmm, who else?"
Whoop snickered. "Ultra, Cost, and Zenith each had another baby. I understand Answer was just about as mad at them as she was with you."
"Not possible."
Verse snickered, and patted her belly. "Fortunately our little bit of vice with Oscar and Bran didn't get broken up too soon. We're both expecting again, in the fall."
The next day the witches started the hike down. Ask and Rustle slowly dropped back, and slipped quietly through to Ash. Rustle folded her end of the corridor shut, cutting off the thicker air here escaping into the lower pressure air at the far end. It made a fair breeze. I ought to be able to do something with that . . .
"Old Gods. The twins are a month old. I shouldn't be so tired!" Ask laid the babies back down in their crib and flopped on the bed. "How did you manage to carry Xen all the way up and back?"
"He was eight months old. I was a whole lot more recovered than you are. And . . . I was stubborn and angry."
Ask shook her head. "You do stubborn and angry better than me, too."
Xen had been scooped up by the grandparents, puppies and all. Rumor had it that a certain goat had been seen showing the dogs the ins and outs of sheep herding, and how to deal with wolves. Rustle thought them a bit young for that, yet. But it meant she was free to travel back and forth to New Tokyo. Lefty and Gre were now doing the surveying, and occasionally drawing outside the upside down temple.
A week later, Oscar and Bran yelled for the God of Roads, and returned to Ash, accompanied by ten beautiful women and three former Eunuch former harem guards. They told a wild (and scandalous) tale about their travels with the God of Vice, and his encounter with the God of Peace. "So Edmund disappeared, leaving us holding the bag, and we ran for it," Bran finished up, to an overflowing audience in the Tavern.
Verse had brought the news to New Tokyo, and a good part of the expedition had taken the corridor to Ash. Selano had returned, towing Gre, and after the story, had taken them all off to Karista. Women and former Eunuchs included.
Rustle noted the Rip Crossing witches fitting in with the others, and quietly returned to New Tokyo.
***
Ask had somehow been magically transformed into a respected adult witch, and was given instruction along with the other Half Moon witches. And she'd been better at channeling, metal working and prospecting than most of them.
Smugness at achievement felt wonderfully sinful. And the prospecting meant she could pay her tab at the Tavern, even though Harry laughed about it. Fine, he was a god, and probably didn't need a whole lot of money. But it felt great to be so independent.
There was failure, too. Not even Answer was able to achieve her goal of moving rocks on the Moon. But they all worked together, and could move rocks hundreds of miles away.
She walked, occasionally, up to the winery and talked to her father. Got to know him as an adult, to feel and delight in his pride at her growing abilities.
"I regret letting these father-less witches keep me from acting like a proper parent."
A soft step on the porch, the newest goddess peeked in. "It was only logical. We started from such a divided and divisive culture." The thin woman ghosted in through the open front door. Ask looked at her curiously. The Goddess hadn't been out much since her rescue . . . had it actually been three months already?
"Yes, dear. Time doesn't matter how busy we are or are not. It ticks along regardless."
"Sorry," Ask blushed. "I need to control my leakage better."
"Yes, although you are definitely better than average. Most of the witches don't even try. Oh, that's very good," she nodded approval, as Ask tucked in all her mental corners.
"I hadn't actually thought of a god or goddess of logic." Ask commented. "Why are such attributes, umm, attached to you?"
She chuckled. "Because that was what I was like before . . . whatever it was that bashed our brains. Somehow I became even more so, and . . .odd things kept happening around me. I try to tuck it in, as you did, dear, and just bring it out at need. Wasn't fast enough with Edmund."
"We're all pretty good at shedding each other's effects." The Auld Wulf shrugged. "Not that I've often tried to shed yours."
"Such flattery. I haven't often needed to affect you, you tend toward the logical instead of the emotional. The reason I came up is that I think it's time for me to see this Karista, and the Colleges there."
The Aulf Wulf studied her. "Remember that the road goes both directions."
"Indeed. I may be right back. I'm having a bit of trouble adjusting to the modern world, so to speak."
"Human nature hasn't changed. Every thing else is details. I need to check up on se
veral things in Karista. Will you travel with me? We could eschew the corridors and let you see the countryside, the towns."
"That sounds delightful."
"So it'll be horse and wagon and hope the snow keeps light. And the roads clear. I'll meet you at Harry's for breakfast."
Ask excused herself, and walked back down with Lady Logic.
"Something is bothering you."
"Yes, secondhand jealousy. A good friend of mine is enamored with the Wolf. She's been away too long, and I worry that they'll forget each other."
Logic smiled. "That would be this Rustle whose very name is enough to turn the man into a frittering mess? Fear not. I don't like emotions, and being infertile without massive inconvenience, I see no reason for sex, either."
"Oh dear," Ask eyed her curiously. "What do you think about deliberately creating magic users that are as powerful as the gods?"
"Something that I certainly hope is unique happened to us. I think these new double sourced children will simply be powerful magic users. " She peeked at the twins, sleeping in Ask's backpack. "And we completely disregarded the wizard gene. Life is just fascinating, and keeps throwing wonderful new things into ones path."
Ask blinked. "Yes, it does, doesn't it?"
Logic sighed. "There was someone, once, that I loved. I can't even remember his name. Before the Exile, I think. Well. I don't think these babies will attract the attention of the collective subconscious. The force that shapes and controls the gods."