“Daddy,” I started to say. “You don’t understand...”
“I understand perfectly,” he said as he looked at Tank. The disappointment in his eyes must have cut Tank to his very soul.
“No, you...” I began.
“Do what he says Marla,” Tank said as he gently pushed my lower back.
I looked up at him. Unable to believe he was sending me away.
“Please,” he said. I could see how important it was to him. His eyes pleaded with me not to make things even worse.
Biting my lip to stop myself from crying, I slowly made my way to the door leading into the house. My dad stepped aside so I could get by but never took his eyes off of Tank.
“Daddy...” I started to explain, but he quickly shook his head and nodded towards the inside of the house. “We’ll talk later. Get inside.”
I swallowed hard and looked back at Tank. The guy looked like his world had just come to a sudden end. He glanced at me and nodded for me to go inside.
This was ridiculous. I was a part of this. It was all my fault, I should be there to deal with the consequences.
Once I was inside, my dad slammed the door behind me. I turned to listen, but I couldn’t hear a word. What were they doing? Were they circling each other ready to fight? No, impossible.
What would my dad do? We hadn’t done anything but kiss. This was stupid.
“What’s going on?” my mother asked as she came out of the living room with a book in her hand. The look she shot me was only curious. “Why is your father slamming doors?” She had no idea how my world had just come apart.
I lost it. I completely came apart. The weeks of tension. The letter, the fear, and joy. Everything had built up to this moment, and I lost it.
I began crying. That deep, ugly cry where you can’t catch your breath. “You have ... to ... stop him,” I blubbered. “He doesn’t ... understand.”
“Who,” my mother asked with a furrowed brow.
“Daddy ... Tank ... me. Please, you have to stop him. He will ruin everything.”
My mother was an intelligent woman. It didn’t take her but about a half-second to figure out what was going on. The creases in her brow relaxed as she pulled me into her arms.
She didn’t say anything. She just rubbed my back as she held me.
We stood like that for almost a minute. My head buried on her shoulder. I couldn’t stop crying, my heart was breaking with every sob.
Suddenly, my father opened the door and stormed past us.
“Jim?” my mother said.
“Not now, Molly,” he replied as he kept walking away from us.
“Tank?” I asked weakly, my voice barely working.
My father halted in his track but didn’t turn around.
“He’s gone,” he said simply then finished walking away from us.
Noooo, he couldn’t be. Not like this. Not now. Not without saying goodbye.
I pulled away from my mom and started to go outside. She gently grabbed my shoulders and said, “Not now, Marla, give it time.”
“But mom, you don’t understand. No one understands. All we did was kiss. I kissed him, he never ...”
She smiled sadly and nodded. “Go to your room for now. Give it time. It will get better, I promise.”
I looked into her eyes and saw that she really didn’t understand. She thought this was some silly crush. Some simple flirtation that had gotten out of hand. She would never understand the depths of my love for Tank. The life I had spent wanting his love.
I ran up the stairs, crying again. My life was over before it began.
Throwing myself onto my bed, I buried my face in my pillow and screamed. Nothing would ever be right again.
How could this happen? What must Tank be going through? Where would he go? Where would he stay? I couldn’t imagine him going back to his mom’s house, not as long as his father was there. He’d die first.
My mind filled with visions of him roaming the streets of Everton. Of him cursing the day he had ever met me.
I spent the night, hiding in my room. Avoiding everyone. I was relatively sure I was never speaking to them again.
Mom sent Michael up to my room with a plate of food. He shot me a look of empathy. Something you didn’t see from Michael very often. Like he was looking at a terminal patient with only one day to live. Obviously everyone knew what had happened.
“Mom said to bring you this,” he said softly. Obviously afraid he was going to upset me and start another crying jag.
I ignored him and turned to stare at the wall.
He mumbled something under his breath and silently left my room.
I lay there, falling into a deep hole of despair. Hating the world and my parents in particular.
The next morning I snuck out without seeing anyone. I had to get to school and talk to Tank. I had to find out what happened. How much did he hate me?
He had been within a heartbeat of breaking up with me. I knew we weren’t officially boyfriend and girlfriend. But it had felt like we were. That tender special feeling that existed between us. I thought we were there.
But then, I had seen it in his eyes. He was going to end it before it could really get started.
I had ruined everything by kissing him. It wasn’t his fault. I thought that if I could get him to feel what I felt, he wouldn’t end it. He couldn’t.
Sighing, I tried to hold myself together. The bus took forever. The kids gave me strange looks. I thought at first that they had heard the sordid tale. But then I realized, they were just surprised to see me there. I’d been riding with my brother.
Once a person found a way to avoid the bus, they never came back.
They didn’t know I was keeping away from Jason. I didn’t want to see that accusatory stare of his. The one that told me how upset he was with me for hurting his friend. Pissing off Dad. And generally screwing up again.
When I got to school I made a beeline for Tank’s homeroom. My mind was working at a mile a minute. He might not even stop at his locker. But he couldn’t avoid his class.
Parking myself outside the door I waited, scanning the hall, not worried I might miss him. The guy sort of stood out.
My heart raced as I fought to stop my hands from sweating. What had my dad said? What did Tank think? A dozen different questions kept running over and over through my mind.
But he didn’t show?
The bell rang, and still, I didn’t move. His teacher shot me a look but didn’t say anything as he closed the door. And still, I didn’t move from that spot.
It was at least five minutes before I started for my own class. My stomach lost in a whirlpool of doubt and questions. Where was he?
I took my tardy slip and filed it away. I was probably going to have a few more before the day was done.
After each class, I would race to his next room and wait. Out of breath, I would search the crowd. Hoping, praying. But nothing.
For three days I did this. My life revolved around looking for Tank and avoiding my family.
I skipped dinner. I wandered the neighborhood. I even stopped at his mom’s to see if he was there.
Nothing, the guy had disappeared and taken my heart with him.
It wasn’t until lunch on Friday that I finally accepted that he wasn’t coming to school. Where was he? Was he alright.
I suddenly got a flash of him jumping onto a freight train and riding out of town. Out of my life forever. I could see Tank doing that. Thinking he was saving me pain by leaving. Ashamed that he had disappointed my father. He would think the only solution was to leave.
Couldn’t the boy see? Wasn’t I worth fighting for?
At lunch, I decided to hunt down Jason and confront him. He might know where Tank was. I would take the look of disdain from my brother if it meant I could learn that Tank was okay.
“Where’s Jason?” I asked Amber as I came up behind her in the lunch line.
She looked at me with sad eyes. She smiled sadly. I kne
w she wanted to help me. But no one could.
“Oh, Marla,” she said as she slowly shook her head. I could tell she was feeling my pain. But that didn’t matter, I needed to talk to my brother.
“Where is Jason?” I asked again. Focused on finding out what had happened to Tank.
“I don’t know,” she said as she slid her tray down the row. “He dropped me off this morning then said he had to do something and he wouldn’t tell me what.”
My heart fell. Jason was my only path to Tank. Nick and Luke wouldn’t tell me anything. They’d circle the wagons and wouldn’t spill a thing. I had hoped that my sibling might feel some of my pain and share with me.
Sighing, I left my tray of food there on the line, turned and walked out. Hanging my head, my shoulders slumped in defeat.
That afternoon, I raced home from the bus stop and slid to a halt. Jason’s truck was parked outside our house.
“Jason,” I yelled as I stormed into the house. My heart racing, my hopes starting to go up. I was done hiding. I was done feeling guilty.
“Jason,” I yelled again.
“He’s not here,” my mother said as she stepped out of the kitchen, stirring something in a bowl.
Three little words and my world came to a complete stop again. Where was Tank! I wanted to yell. Didn’t anyone care?
“Where is he?” I demanded.
“I’m right here,” Jason said as he stepped in the front door. My hands clenched up as I turned to face him, then my insides turned to soup when I saw Tank follow him into our house.
Chapter Fifteen
Tank
The girl looked like an angry angel. Her eyes flashed like she wanted to hit something. Then they found mine and a soft, silky look came over them. As if she were finally able to relax.
I swallowed hard. It took everything inside of me not to go to her and pull her into my arms. I had been so worried about her. What she was going through. How upset her family must be. It had pulled at me for three days.
Gathering myself, I looked at Marla’s mom and said, “Mrs. T can I talk to you and Mr. Turner.”
She looked back at me for a long moment. A sudden surprise washed over me when I realized she wasn’t staring at me with pure hate. Maybe I could do this.
“What is it Molly,” Mr. Turner asked as he stepped up next to her. He saw me and his eyes instantly took on a hard look. Like he’d just spotted a rat in the pantry.
“Jim,” Mrs. T said as she gently laid a hand on his arm. I could tell she was silently holding him back from saying something he would regret.
Marla kept glancing back and forth between us. Fighting desperately to understand what was going on.
“If you have a minute,” I said. “I need to explain.”
Her father looked at me for a long second then nodded and said, “In here,” as he turned and walked to the living room.
“Michael,” Mrs. T said to her son doing his homework on the couch. “Go outside and play.”
“Oh, Mom,” he whined, obviously upset at missing all the action.
“Do what your mother says,” Mr. Turner growled as he turned and watched me follow him into the room.
“Marla,” he continued, “you go to your room.”
She put her hands on her hips and stared back her father. Pure lioness, I thought.
“If you think I’m letting you talk about me without me being here, you’re crazy,” she said as she dared her father.
I noticed that the corner of Mrs. T’s lips twitched. Almost as if she was trying to hide a smile.
“Sir,” I said hoping I could avoid a big blow up between the two of them. “This will only take a moment.”
He looked at me, his eyes penetrating and steady. He slowly nodded his head, giving me a chance.
I took a deep breath and tried to hold it together. Everything was going to turn on these next words.
“Sir,” I began. “I am in love with your daughter.”
Marla’s gasp behind me made me hesitate for a moment. In the thousands of scenarios that had run through my mind as I prepared for this. I had never thought about Marla being in the room.
Jason stepped forward. “Listen to him Dad, this is Tank we are talking about.”
“Did you know about this?” his dad demanded.
Jason laughed. “What, that Marla’s been in love with this idiot since she was six years old? Sure, I knew. I also knew that eventually, at his own pace, he’d figure out how special she was and fall for her too.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Mr. Turner asked, as his brow creased in a heavy frown. He looked as if Jason had betrayed him somehow.
“Because it is their business,” Jason said. “Besides, I figured that with Tank, I didn’t have to worry about Marla ever getting hurt. Tank would die before he ever hurt her. Think about it. You can’t keep her locked up in her room for the rest of her life.”
“If I could figure out a way, I would,” Mr. Turner mumbled under his breath.
Jason ignored him and said, “Be honest, can you think of a person you would rather she be with?”
I hadn’t expected Jason to stick up for me.
“She’s too young,” Mr. Turner said as he shook his head.
“Jim,” Mrs. T said as she stepped up next to him and slipped her arm into his. “They are the same age we were when we met.”
He looked down at her and said, “Exactly.”
Mrs. T. blushed slightly, but she didn’t back down. She continued to stare at him, silently demanding that he give in.
Swallowing hard, I continued, “I promise you, I didn’t plan it. It just happened. I never wanted to disrespect you or your family. But, I can’t stop the way I feel.”
He looked at me for a long moment. The silence dragged on forever, and I knew that he wasn’t sold. Not yet.
“I realize that I can’t stay here anymore. I’ll move over to Nick’s. At least until I can find my own place. But that isn’t going to change the way I feel about Marla. Nothing will ever change that.”
“She is sixteen. I am her father,” he said, his voice rising. “I still have some say in what happens to her.”
“Dad,” Marla said as she stepped forward. I could feel the two of them staring at each other. Neither willing to back down.
I gently touched her shoulder and shook my head. I didn’t need Marla sticking up for me. This was my fault, my problem. She had to let me deal with it.
Her eyes got soft for a moment as if she understood what I was trying to tell her. She nodded slightly and stepped back, but not so far that I couldn’t feel her, right there next to me if I needed her.
“Yes, Sir,” I said. “And, I will respect your rules.”
“Ha,” he said. Obviously thinking about the times, we had gone behind his back.
“I will respect them. I will not talk to her. I will remove myself from her life.”
“No,” Marla whispered.
“But,” I continued, “you will be ruining any chance of either of us finding true happiness in this life. I know in my heart that we are meant to be together. I think I’ve always known it.
“If we are not together. Or at least not given a chance to find out. There will always be a cloud hanging over us. A question of what if.”
I held my breath, everyone held their breath as a heavy silence fell over the room. This was the moment. My life hung in the balance.
Mr. Turner stared at me for a long minute, then over at Marla. My heart pounded in my chest.
At last, his shoulders slumped, and I was able to exhale.
“You are living at Nick’s?” he said.
“Yes, Sir.”
“And if you get her pregnant ...”
“Daddy,” Marla gasped as her face turned redder than the city’s new fire truck.
“ ... I will shoot you, you understand?” he finished. Giving me a hard stare to let me know that he was deadly serious.
I exhaled slowly.
Marla look
ed back and forth between her dad and myself. Her forehead scrunched up in a row of furrows as she tried to understand what it meant.
“What it means,” I said to her. “Is that if you will have me, I get to be your boyfriend.”
Her eyes got as big as a harvest moon as a wide smile broke out on her face.
“That is what I have always wanted,” she said as she buried her head in my chest and hugged me like I was the most important thing in the world.
I hugged her back, making sure my hands stayed where they belonged.
She smiled up at me and I knew to my very soul that she and I belonged together. Like long lost halves that finally come together to make a whole.
Epilogue
Marla
My heart fluttered as I walked down the hall holding Tank’s hand. Everything was so different. So new and wonderful. The jealous looks. The surprised faces. Priceless, each and every one of them.
Even Ruby Miller gave me a smile and a small nod of approval.
Tank smiled down at me, and I knew he was thinking the same thing. We didn’t have to hide. We didn’t have to pretend. We could just be ourselves. Two young people very much in love with each other.
He stopped at my locker and waited for me to get my books for the next class.
“You know,” he said, “this means we will probably have to go to the prom together. I know it’s like four months away. But a guy’s got to build up to something like that.”
I laughed. “Don’t make it sound like a death sentence.”
“Just so you know,” he continued, “I don’t dance.”
I looked up at him and said, “Tank Gunderson, you will dance with me at the prom or forty years from now, I will tell your grandchildren that you were too chicken to dance with their grandmother.”
He laughed and said, “Okay, you win. Just this once. But don’t think you’re going to win all of our arguments.”
I smiled up at him and silently told myself, what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.
Grinning at each other like two love sick puppies, we continued on to my class. Where we stopped, and he pulled me into a quick hug.
Mr. Thompson gave us a quick frown, but he didn’t say anything. I think he knew that there wasn’t anything that could ever come between Tank and me.
My Brother's Best Friend (The Lakeland Boys Book 3) Page 9