by Lola StVil
“What ‘other love’? What are you talking about?” he pushes.
“I’m talking about the one thing you love more than me—distance. It lures you in and you disappear and leave me to figure it out on my own. I thought now that we are married, you would never go back to craving ‘her.’ But you love her. You love ‘distance,’ and when things get hard, you reach for her and not me.”
“That’s not true. I didn’t take off on you. Okay, I did. But I came back soon after. I wasn’t away for long,” he protests.
“You shouldn’t have been away at all. Minutes after we talked about having a child, we learn that we can’t. So what’s your solution? Take off. And just when I needed you the most. You did what you always do—run. You run as far as you can as fast as you can.”
“I needed time to process, okay?”
“No! That’s not okay. We were in it together. You wanted to set the world on fire, you wanted to shout to the heavens and cry. That’s fine, but you should have done that with me. You and I are the only ones in this relationship. Not your dad, not my mom, just us. Yet you turned away from me and just took off.”
“I wouldn’t have been any use to you,” he says.
“You were falling apart. Well, me too. But we should have fallen apart together. Instead, you did what was best for you. Not best for me or us, best for you. So maybe I am selfish, but so are you.”
“I didn’t leave you to hurt you. You know that.”
“No, I didn’t. Not right away. At first I wanted to fly after you and bite your damn head off. I mean what kind of husband flies away when his wife is devastated? And what kind of angel takes off when he’s most needed?” I ask bitterly.
He doesn’t answer. There’s so much going on behind his eyes. There’s frustration, pain, and uncertainty. He’s pissed off, but I’m not sure if it’s with himself or with me. It may be both.
“Do you know why I didn’t go after you, Aaden? Because I knew what you needed from me more than anything was my understanding. And as hard as it was to do, I gave it to you. I didn’t yell, argue, or make you feel like shit because you took off,” I snap angrily.
Again, he doesn’t say anything. I can’t tell what he’s thinking, and right now, I don’t care. He had his say and I will have mine.
“Aaden, you can say a million things about me. Omnis knows I’m not perfect. You can say that I’m stubborn, difficult, impulsive and, yeah, maybe selfish. But you have no right to say that I can’t love. You run away from us, you put up walls, and you have a short fuse. But I loved through that.
“I had to swallow that Sive. That’s who I am. I’m Marcus Cane’s daughter…he never taught me how to give up. Yes, I’ve messed up as a leader, as a daughter, and certainly as a friend. But I have loved you and that love has never faltered, even when I was with Bex. I think you said I couldn’t love anyone because you wanted to hurt me. And that is cruel.
“Aaden, today I made your worst nightmare come true. And I am sorry for that. But every time we argue or things get hard, I think to myself, ‘Is this the day he takes off again?’ That’s my nightmare. That’s my White Room…”
Diana returns to the clinic and tells us Nix is safe and that there hasn’t been any contact made with Malakaro through the newborn. Dylan returns not long after and asks us to gather in my room, which is slowly starting to feel like more like a prison cell.
The last one to enter the room is Swoop. She had a video call with RJ. I heard them earlier, singing a song that Swoop had taught him. They sounded too cute for words. It made my heart hurt a little. Even though the mark is gone, meaning I can have kids, the way things are with Aaden right now, I don’t see that for us.
“Okay, what did you learn about Apex?” I ask once we’re all together.
“Apex is an angel with an extraordinary gift—vision. He had the ability to see days into the future. It was a gift only given to Fate at the time. Granted, Apex could not see as far as Fate could; still, his gift was impressive,” Dylan explains.
“What happened to him? Can he still see the future?” Diana asks.
“No. At some point in his life, Apex grew weary of only being able to see part of the future and was envious that Fate could see so much more. He asked Omnis to expand his power and insisted that it would be for the betterment of humanity. Omnis said that the gift of foresight should go to the rare beings that understood that there are consequences for knowing things before their time. And Apex was simply too immature to understand. So he was denied,” Dylan says.
“Let me guess, Apex took it very well and let this be,” East says cynically.
“No, he went out on his own and tried to increase his powers,” Dylan adds.
“Was he able to do it?” Aaden asks.
“Yes and no. He put together a series of very dangerous and forbidden mixtures; they allowed him to see the next two thousand years for mankind.”
“Apex knows what’s going to happen to mankind for the next two thousand years?” Swoop says.
“He saw all the events that would happen. But in doing so, it scrambled his brain,” Dylan tells us.
“I don’t get it. He was a powerful angel, why did seeing the future mess with his head?” I ask.
“Think of it this way: seeing what will happen before it actually happens is like spotting a ray of sun that no one else can see or feel. It’s warm, bright, and inviting. But increase that ability and all of a sudden you’re not gazing at the sun from a safe distance. You’re actually standing right in front of it.
“So what was once warming your skin is now melting your flesh. The slightly wondrous glare of the sun is now a brutal assault on your eyes. And the awe-inspiring beam of light that you cherished is now an unstoppable surge of power that will render you blind,” Dylan explains.
“So seeing too much made him insane?” Aaden says.
“Yes. Now he can’t see the future. He can’t even see five seconds ahead. So now he’s…”
“Now he’s bat-crap crazy,” East says, helping Dylan, who was at a loss for words.
“Yes,” Dylan replies.
“But why didn’t Fate go crazy? He sees everything,” Swoop says.
“That’s a misconception. Fate doesn’t see everything. He sees more than any other being but not everything. And the reason Fate didn’t lose his mind is because Omnis equipped him with the ability to handle his power. In other words, Fate has protection. He won’t go nuts,” Dylan adds.
“What happened after that?” I ask.
“When Apex could no longer see the future, he went off the deep end. He attacked everyone—good, bad, or indifferent. They finally had to put him away. Years later they learned that while Apex is crazy, he had also gained some powers thanks to all the mixtures. He could read people’s deep desires and fears. He also has the ability to build vast make-believe worlds in his mind. And bring them to life. The fact is while Apex is insane, he’s also brilliant. He has a talent for sniffing out the pain in others. He is the ‘Omnis’ of the torture and torment world.”
“Dylan, why would they let an angel like that exist?” I ask.
“They lost track of him. After he helped build Bliss, the angel prison, he went underground. Only a few beings knew how to get in contact with him. The owner of the Center was one of those beings. He used Apex to create the Center and the White Room. He’s done other jobs. If there’s a structure designed to inflict pain, Apex is the creator.”
“So he lost his mind and turned evil,” Swoop concludes.
“No, Apex isn’t really good or bad,” Dylan says.
“Really? That’s your take on it?” Aaden says.
“Silver, what I mean by that is this: Apex is the textbook definition of insane. He doesn’t do things that are right and wrong. He does things that make sense in his head. For example, when he created the prison, all he asked for in return was a bottle of giggle-flavored Coy. That made sense in his head.
“Conversely, when he built the White
Room, he demanded everything of value that Bishop owned. Apex once went into a bar and cut out an angel’s eyes because he thought that angel was blinking curses at him in a secret language. He’s unstable and unpredictable,” Dylan says.
“So to him, building the White Room could have been the same as being asked to build a playroom?” I ask.
“Yes. His morals and his ability to gauge good and evil are seriously impaired,” Dylan adds.
“Wow…what else?” East asks.
“He’s always been hard to find, but a few years back, he went into complete seclusion. Some angels say he contracted a serious virus, some think he was held prisoner by someone he helped torture, and a few angels think he fell in love and gave up the life. I don’t know, but I think once we know what happened in those missing years, we’ll know what drives him and why he’s after all of you.”
“And I take it you have no idea where to find him?” Aaden says.
“Sorry. I passed this picture around to everyone I could find,” he says as he takes the fragile picture from his pocket and places it on the nightstand by my bed.
“So we’re back to having nothing,” I say to myself.
“I’m sorry,” Dylan says.
“Hey, you were amazing. We would not have gotten this far without you,” Swoop says as she leans in and kisses him on the cheek. Dylan blushes and tries hard to hide how much Swoop’s approval means to him.
Without warning, a being pops up in my room, on a Port. He is human but has a stern expression that could rival any demon. He is clearly angry.
“Grandpa!” I shout, overjoyed as I make my way to him.
“Not so fast, missy! We have some talking to do. Actually, I have some yelling to do. Then some more yelling,” Grandpa Julian says loudly.
“Um…I’m sorry, I have been meaning to call. Things have been really busy,” I reply, hoping my explanation is enough.
“I don’t give a care how busy you are,” he counters as he gets off the Port.
“How did you know we were here?” I ask.
“I have my ways. I didn’t think I’d need to use them. I thought my family would share information with me,” Julian scolds.
“It wasn’t intentional,” Aaden replies.
“You are not talking, demon,” he replies.
“Grandpa! What’s wrong with you? You like Aaden,” I remind him.
“I did until he went and married my grandbaby without sending me so much as an email!” he spits.
“Yeah, we got the lecture already. We’re sorry about that,” Aaden says.
“Sorry don’t mean shit. I should have your balls in a blender!”
Someone kill me now!
“Grandpa, please, we have so much to deal with right now. Can’t you just let this go?” I beg.
“Sorry, I can’t. What in the hell has been happening with this team anyway? Swallowing Sives, making deals with trash like Orkin, and going to a damn graveyard knowing your powers won’t work!” he snaps.
“We didn’t know that at the time,” Diana reasons.
“That’s why you send out a scout. You do your research. What the hell is this about going into a mission blind? Is that what I taught you? Is that what your father taught you?” he pushes.
“No,” I reply.
“What about the rest of you? Did your parents teach you to work a mission this way?”
The team mumbles no under their breaths.
“Now, Omnis knows me and Marcus have gone a few rounds, but he led his team well and he taught you to do the same. And what about Emmy? I know she taught you better than this, Carrot,” he says gravely.
“Grandpa, I’m glad you’re here. I missed you, but if you came to yell at me for…whatever, it’s gonna have to wait,” I reply firmly.
“Hell no. I didn’t come to yell.”
“Said the guy yelling,” East mumbles.
“Well, I didn’t come just to yell. You all are important to me. It makes me good and mad to see all of you in so much danger. And then—oh, great! You all decided to make things worse by contacting this psycho,” Grandpa says as he picks up the picture of Apex on the table.
“You know Apex?” East asks.
“Of course I do. That guy is crazy as hell. I’ve dealt with him before. I tell you, it’s a wonder his kid turned out normal,” he says.
“Apex has a kid?” I ask.
“He has two. One of them was as crazy as he was and the other, well, you know…” Julian says factually.
“Actually, we don’t,” I confess.
“Pry, you really don’t know who the Architect is?” Julian asks, stunned.
“No, who is he?”
“The Architect is Randy’s real father.”
Grandpa is about to fill us in when East asks for him to pause. We all look at him like he’s crazy, but he disappears into the sky and comes back a few moments later with a dozen bottles of Coy.
“You made us wait so you could get a drink?” Diana says.
“Damn right!” he says.
“That’s insane!” Swoop replies.
“Really? Who here doesn’t need a drink?” East asks. He looks around, and even Grandpa is game for a drink. East passes them out and we all drink. I’m not sure I should with the mixtures I’m taking, but hey, it’s too late now.
“Okay, before you continue, Julian, I just want to make sure we are on the same twisted page. So the Architect’s real name is Apex. He is an angel who went mad. Apex found love with a woman, who then gave birth to twins: Alfred, also known as Spider, and Randy, also known as Pry’s BFF. Is that right?” East asks.
“Yes,” Grandpa says.
“Okay, just wanted to be sure I had reason enough to drink this third bottle of Coy,” East says, then drains the bottle in one gulp.
“So why is Apex out to get us?” I ask.
“You’re asking me to explain the reasoning of a madman. All I know is that even if you don’t raise your kids, you still rain down all hell on the ones who mess with them. Your team killed his son Spider,” Grandpa says.
“Yeah, but we saved his other son. We saved Randy a dozen times,” Swoop replies.
“I know. And maybe that will count for something,” Grandpa adds.
“Or maybe it won’t and Apex picks and chooses which facts he will pay attention to,” Dylan says.
“Did he have it out for me from the beginning?” Aaden asks.
“No, he was impressed by you.”
“Julian, what do you mean?” Aaden says.
“He created the White Room, a place of pure hell, and you lasted a year. No one had ever done that before. The more you withstood, the more excited Apex was to break you. It was his twisted way of showing you respect.”
“Great, and this is the guy who has the ashes we need to save the world?” Diana says.
“Yes,” Grandpa replies.
“We can also save Randy with them. So why would he take them from us?” I ask.
“I don’t know. But something tells me he’s going to make it his mission to meet with you and your team. He went to a lot of trouble; I’m guessing he’s designing something especially cruel for all of you,” Grandpa adds.
“Or he could just as easily be planning an ice cream party for us,” East says.
“Exactly. But since you don’t need any prep work for ice cream, I suggest you all get ready for a battle.”
“So you know where he is, Grandpa?”
“I have a few ideas. I’ll check it out and get back to you.”
“The team will go with you,” I reply.
“No, I got this. There are only three places he could be. I’ll find the location and report back. In the meantime, I have a cabin in the Andes Mountains full of weapons from past battles. You should go and take what you need,” Grandpa suggests.
“Okay, but be careful, and if you see Apex, don’t engage,” I reply.
“Look at you, giving me orders,” Grandpa says with pride. He tells the team the exact
location of the cabin; then he takes me aside. “I wanna talk to you.”
“I know you hate the way I’m running this team, and I’m not the great leader my dad was.”
“That is not what I was going to say.”
“It’s not?” I reply, confused.
“No. It so happens, I’m proud of my grandbaby and her team.”
“Why? We aren’t nearly as far as we need to be on this mission. And we never would have figured out who Apex was had it not been for you. Why didn’t we just come to you in the first place?” I ask myself.
“Because all your life you watched your mom and she never involved me. So you grew up not thinking of me as an option.”
“Hey, why didn’t Mom come to you more often?” I ask.
“She wanted me and your grandmother to have a normal life. She knows how much the angel world has messed with the two of us. She wants us to be free of it all.”
“Is that what you want, Grandpa?”
“Yeah, I hate the angel world. But I love you. So if you need me, just let me know. And if anyone messes with you, you send them to me,” he vows.
“You don’t have any powers, Grandpa,” I remind him gently.
“Who needs powers? I can still kick ass, you know.”
“Yeah, I know,” I reply with a huge grin as I embrace him. He holds me very tightly and calls me Baby Carrot.
“Grandpa, you can’t do that. I’m all grown up!” I remind him.
“The hell, you are always going to be a little bitty thing to me. You okay with that?” he asks.
“Yeah, I am.”
“Good! I’ll go see what I can find out about Apex’s location. Don’t you worry, we’ll find it.”