by Kayla Oliver
“Trusting?” he replies, and I nod.
“That’s nicer than I was going to be,” I say, and he laughs. Looking up at him in shock, I see him struggling to calm down.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “You’re just so young. This really will blow over, okay? I know it seems like the end of the world now, but it will pass. One day you might even look back and laugh or tell your kids about the crazy things that you did when you were young.”
“Thank you,” I say as we step on the dock. “That makes me feel better.” And it does. Because he’d also said he did some stupid stuff as a kid, but he’s obviously not suffering right now.
“Well, I’m glad,” he says, “I’d rather see you smiling. Now, I propose a contest. He or she who catches the bigger fish doesn’t have to clean them.”
“Oh, you’re on,” I say, and he laughs. We cast our lines into the water.
“Tell me about Cliff,” I say, and his father is quick to respond.
“What do you want to know?” he asks, reeling a bit to keep his line taut.
I think a moment before speaking. “Was he always so intense?” I ask, unable to help myself.
“Yeah,” his father says. “He’s always been observant and quiet.”
“You’re not kidding,” I say, thinking about how little Cliff actually says. But everything he needs to convey is. Even when he’s not using words, he’s pretty good about letting everyone know what’s on his mind. That or I’ve just gotten good at reading him.
“I was actually worried,” his father says as I place my pole in the pole holder and cross my legs to get more comfortable on the wooden dock, “that he’d never find a woman willing to put up with his silence.”
“I like it,” I muse. “I know he’s never just talking to fill the time. He speaks when something important is on his mind.” I’ve never been a fan of small talk. I reel in and recast my line, trying a different spot.
His father does the same, taking a spot off the end of the dock. We sit in silence a while, each waiting for a nibble on our lines while we just enjoy the crisp air and the pretty water. The lake gives way to thick trees and pretty greens before mountains slope away from the bank.
It’s picture-perfect, the kind of place I’d love to wake to every morning. It’s amazing how, not all that long ago, I’d wanted to wake up to the bustle of the city. Now I want nothing more than the quiet. Maybe I’d just never known what I was missing.
I feel a bite and jerk my pole back, before reeling in the fish. His father is quick to grab the net and gently scoop the fish out of the water. It’s a nice bass, at least nine inches long. We slip it into the basket, and I put another worm on my hook and cast again.
“Nice one,” his father says, and I tell him I’m going to make sure to catch us all dinner.
“You better quit slacking,” I tease, and he’s quick to smile.
“Hey, you go ahead and do this. I’m going to nap.” He feigns snoring, and I glance over my shoulder at the house.
“What do you think they’re talking about?” I ask, curious.
“You,” his father says, and I glance at him. He arches an eyebrow at me in a manner that’s all Cliff. “What do you think they’re discussing?”
“That Cliff should see someone who’s not going to outfish him,” I joke, but there’s an uncomfortable ring of truth beyond the humor. I do worry his mother is going to warn him against me, especially now that I know they know about my naked pictures and all the drama in my life.
“I doubt it,” he says thoughtfully, staring at the house. “I bet she’s telling him he’d better not let you go.” He winks at me, and I can’t help but worry. “Look,” he says, and I look at him as he speaks. “Even if she didn’t like you—which she does; trust me, you’d know it if she didn’t—do you really think anyone could sway Cliff away from something he really wants?”
Well, no.
I shake my head, and he laughs.
“Shh,” I reprimand him. “You’re going to scare away the fish.”
He’s quick to quiet down, and we return to fishing in a companionable silence once more. I find myself thinking about my dad. I miss him. And I feel like these two men would get along really well. Because Cliff’s dad reminds me of my dad. They’re both so easygoing and friendly, and quick to humor.
I miss my dad. And my mom. It feels like it’s been forever since I got to talk to them, but I don’t want to drag them into the shitstorm that is my life right now. And I don’t want to face them right now, knowing they’ve also seen the naked pictures of me.
They’re likely disappointed in me, and I don’t want to see that in their eyes when they look at me.
“Do you think my parents are disappointed in me?” I ask, the words practically bursting out of me.
He doesn’t answer for a moment. “I’m not really sure,” he says finally, “You’d have to ask them. But I can’t imagine they would be.”
“Thank you,” I say, the words burning like fire in my throat.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Cliff
“Yeah, your dad’s out fishing with her,” Mom says, peeking out the window. I grumble.
“He better not get any ideas,” I say, and Mom looks at me, laughter in her eyes. She sits down in a chair facing the fireplace, and I stretch out on the couch at an angle where I can see Addie sitting beside my father on the dock. She’s amused, judging by the set of her lips, and I know they’re having a grand old time as they fish.
“I wanted to talk to you,” Mom says, her expression thoughtful, as if she’s remembering something from a long time ago and wondering how to explain it to me. Giving her my full attention, I wonder what’s on her mind. It’s not like my mother to be unsure. So whatever it is, it must be important.
“Earlier I asked what you were going to do about it,” she says, her lips pursing.
I nod, remembering the flash of panic I’d felt that I had to do anything about it. Because all of this is so new, I haven’t really thought ahead, not yet. For now, I kind of want to see how Addie feels before I do anything that might scare her off.
“I had a reason,” Mom says, still sounding rather hesitant. She pulls something from her pocket and studies it, but I can’ t see what it is. “You remember your great-grandma Mona, right?” she asks, and I nod. Of course I remember her. I’d been a child when she’d passed, but the memories I do have are warm and filled with love and unconditional acceptance. She’d been a kind soul, someone who was loving and sweet right up to her last breath.
Mom seems lost in her thoughts as she continues. “Well, she left an heirloom and told me to pass it to you when the time was right.” Mom looks up at me, her eyes damp.
“All these years I’ve been waiting, but you never brought any girls home, never mentioned a special someone, and while I have to admit this was an odd route to take, this girl seems perfect for you,” she says, finally taking a breath as she studies the thing in her hands for a moment more in silence.
“I’m sorry,” I say, realizing how hard this has been on her. I’ve never been someone who’s just casual letting people meet my parents. I see now that I’ve shut her out of a part of my life she wanted to be more involved in though never knew how to ask.
She looks up at me with a gentle smile. “Don’t be. Anyway, I think it’s time to pass this on.” She reaches the item out to me, and I see it’s a ring. I take it and study the exquisite craftsmanship.
The band becomes two leaves that create a bed for the center diamond that’s set to look like it’s floating. Around it leaves close around, giving it the appearance of a rose cast in white gold. A rose bud opening to reveal a diamond.
It’s perfect.
“Thank you,” I say softly. I never even knew that this heirloom existed. I look up and see Mom’s smiling. Joy shines in her eyes, and there’s a curve to her lips that’s all pride and excitement.
“Don’t mess this up,” she teases, and I can’t help but grin. “She
’s a wonderful girl.”
“I’m glad you like her,” I say, and I truly am glad.
“She’s been through a lot,” Mom says, looking over shoulder and out the window at Addie and Dad, still fishing and clearly talking about something much more serious than they had been before.
I nod.
Mom glances at me again, her expression unreadable. “I also saw that her ex got attacked by some guy. Would you happen to know anything about that?”
Leave it to Mom to make me feel like a kid who’s been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “Of course not,” I say, feigning innocence. I know she’s not buying it for an instant, though, and her lips curve upward a little more.
“Well, good. Whoever attacked him should get a medal, though.”
I feel my eyebrows lift. “My mother is condoning violence on an innocent man?” I ask, my tone falsely incredulous.
She shakes her head. “There was nothing innocent about that man. What he did was criminal, and he deserves to be locked up.”
I nod in agreement as I look out the window at Addie and my father again. She’s pulling in a fish, and he scoops it out of the water with a net. And I realize she needs her dad. And her mom. She needs her family, the people who love her, who support her no matter what.
“Thank you,” I tell Mom as I look down at the ring again. “What are you going to do now?” I ask, wondering if they’re planning to stay for a while or if they’re going to go back home.
“I think we’ll head back and give you kids some time to yourselves,” she says, her meaning all too clear. I glance sharply at her and see the twinkle in her eyes. “I’m getting old. Don’t make me wait too long for grandkids,” she says, and I shake my head.
“You’re not old,” I say, “and don’t count on grandkids anytime soon. We haven’t had those discussions.” But I have to admit, the thought of Addie big and pregnant makes me smile. I imagine she’d be fucking sexy with a swollen belly.
But Mom is giving me a look that says she’s not buying my excuses. The door opens, and I tuck the ring in my pocket really quick as I see my father and Addie come in.
“How was the fishing?” I ask, recovering quickly.
“Not biting,” Dad says, sounding sullen as Addie grins and tells us she caught one.
She elbows my father. “They weren’t biting for you,” she teases and looks at me. “So what’s up? You going to come fishing with us?”
My mom clears her throat.
“We were actually going to head home and give you guys some time to enjoy yourselves.”
Addie seems genuinely sad. “Well, it was a pleasure meeting you, Robin.”
My mom stands up and pulls Addie into a tight hug. “Call me Mom,” she says, winking at me over Addie’s shoulder. When she backs off, she takes Addie’s shoulders and looks her in the eyes. “You’re part of the family now, hear?”
And I realize the ring was more than the passing of a family heirloom. It was my mother giving me her blessing. It was her way of telling me she approves of Addie.
Addie nods, and Mom continues talking to her. “No matter what happens. And I need you to keep this guy in line.” She nods at me without ever taking her eyes off Addie.
“I’ll do my best,” Addie says, and I hear the humor in her voice. She looks over her shoulder at me, and I see the sparkle of amusement in her eyes. “It’s not easy,” she says out of the corner of her mouth to my mother, and I arch an eyebrow at her.
We walk out with my parents, and Addie seems sad to see them go. “They’re really sweet,” she says as they get in the car after hugs and goodbyes.
“I like them a little,” I tell her as my parents pull away. I think about the ring in my pocket and the fact that I wanted her parents to come see her.
“I’m scared of my parents,” she confides, her voice low. “I’m scared they’re disappointed in me, that they’re going to be upset and ashamed of me.” Her voice sounds broken, and I pull her into a hug as we wave at my parents and they disappear down the drive.
“They’re not going to be ashamed or disappointed,” I say, and she looks up at me, her face trusting.
“How can you be so sure?”
I shrug. “I just am,” I say, deciding now is not the time to tell her I’ve already talked with her parents and they’re only worried about her and love her. I decide that I’ll put off the proposal and will have them come down to see her before I ask.
Because she needs them. She needs them like I’d thought she did, but it’s more dire than I’d even considered. It cuts like a knife that she’s worried what her parents—who love her unconditionally—think of her.
I wish I could tell her that no one blames her. Arlo is a bastard, and no one thinks she’s what he claimed. Well, no one other than stupid people on the internet who’ve never met her and don’t know the real her.
I pull her into a hug, and she tilts her face up.
Lowering my head, I press my lips to hers, thinking about how sweet and perfect she is. And I decide I can wait. I’ll wait for her forever if I have to.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Addie
We walk back in the house, and I glance up at Cliff, wondering what his plans are now. I’m dying to try out the bathtub.
“Mind if I take a bath?” I ask, and he shakes his head.
“I’ve got some phone calls to make,” he says, and I nod before rising up on tiptoes to give him another kiss. His lips are gentle on mine, and I find myself hungry for more of what we’d done last night.
But I’ve got a date with the bathtub first.
Cliff takes his phone out of his pocket, and I almost ask him if I can use it to call my parents. But I just don’t feel able to face them right now. I love them dearly, but I just can’t right now.
But he pushes it into my hands and closes his around mine so I’m cradling the phone. “Call them,” he says, but I shake my head.
“I can’t yet,” I say, looking up at him and pleading with him to understand. “I will, soon. Give me some time to think about what to say.”
I pull my hands away, leaving the phone cupped in his hands, and head up the stairs toward the master bathroom. It was a sweet gesture on his part, but I just need a little time to figure out how to swallow the embarrassment I feel.
Because everyone else is so sure my parents will still love me and not be ashamed, but I have to come to terms with the thought of them seeing naked pictures of me. I’d told them I wasn’t going to be that kind of model. That it was a legitimate job. I’d screwed up. And now I have to face that, and I’m just not ready.
I run the water and undress with shaking fingers. While part of me is certain it’ll all work out just fine, I can’t turn off that nagging doubt in my mind. And the embarrassment is going to take time to fade, I’m sure.
When I settle into the hot water, I feel the pain and worry subside and I sink in deep and relax.
***
I wake to find Cliff nearby with a book in his hands. He looks up at me as I sit up a bit more. “Just making sure you’re okay,” he says. “But you were sleeping, so I just sat by to make sure you didn’t drown.” He gives a smile that softens his words.
“Thank you,” I say, and he nods.
“You must have needed it.” There’s a gentle concern in his voice that brings me fully awake.
“I’m okay,” I say, smiling at him as I lift my hand and make a face at my wrinkled fingers. “Except for looking like a prune.”
I let the water out and stand up as he walks over and wraps me up in a towel. With him holding on to me, I step out of the tub, and he grabs a second towel and places it over my head before twirling it around my hair. With his help, I dry off, and he hands me fresh, clean clothes. I can’t help but smile at him. He’s thoughtful.
When I’m dressed, I head out of the bathroom with him in tow. I hear voices downstairs and freeze. But he steps in front of me and takes my hands and leads me down the stairs.
I see my parents sitting on the couch, talking quietly as he walks me toward them. And I’m furious. “How could you?” I ask. He glances over his shoulder at me, but his expression is unreadable.
My parents look up and see us. Mom stands up and brings her hands to her face. I see tears in her eyes as I walk up to her. Then she pulls me into a tight hug as Dad stands up and wraps his arms around us both.
“You’re okay,” Mom says, her voice breaking as Dad whispers that he loves me.
“I’m okay,” I say, feeling my voice choke up around a painful lump in my throat. “I missed you guys,” I say, and their arms tighten around me.
“We missed you,” Mom says, and she looks over my shoulder. I follow her gaze to Cliff, who’s watching us with a slight look of satisfaction. But I still feel anger. He shouldn’t have done this. He should have listened when I told him I needed time. He should have respected my wishes.
But I’m glad to see my parents.
When we finally let go, Mom and Dad sit down and I take another seat with Cliff standing and watching careful, like a guardian. And I realize the embarrassment I thought I’d feel is nonexistent.
“I’m sorry.” The words burst out of me, and I feel them and tears coming as I speak. “I’m sorry for everything—”
But Mom holds up her hand, and Dad begins to nod as if he agrees with her even though she hasn’t said anything yet.
“Don’t apologize for that monster!” Mom sounds mad, and I see anger in Dad’s face.
I feel confused. This isn’t what I expected. And Dad seems to see that. “Look,” he says, his face turning a little red. “We know what happened. We know that what happened between you and Arlo was supposed to be private.” He and Mom exchange a glance that tells me more than I’d like to know about similar things they must have done.