“Do you know what that woman’s into? How do we know she didn’t ask him to beat her up?”
Cam tilted his head and reminded himself this was Frisco’s mom. “Clemente cracked her cheekbone, messed up the connections at the back of her jawbone, dislocated her shoulder, broke some ribs, and she needed stitches in her rectum. No one would ask for that, and especially not Cass.”
“You like this girl?”
“She’s one of my best friends. I love her, but…not romantically.”
God, Frisco needed to get out here now, before he stuck his foot in his mouth so far he couldn’t get it out.
* * * *
“Mama!” Frisco said as he glided out, leaned down to hug her, and then sat beside Cam. “You’ve met Cameron?”
“I have. He’s your friend?”
“Well, mama, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”
He’d thought he would do this in the restaurant where she was less likely to scream and make a fuss, but he suddenly doubted his logic and wished he’d decided to do this somewhere more private.
However, he’d started it and would never get the nerve again, so he put his arm around Cam and said, “I need to let you know I like boys and girls, mama. Cam’s special to me. I love him.”
His mother looked from Frisco to Cam and back at least twenty times without saying anything. A waitress brought out their chips, salsa, and cheese, and Frisco thanked her and took a bite. He’d brought their drinks when he came, so they were set until their entrees arrived.
His mother sighed, picked up a chip, and ate it without dipping it into anything.
“Mmmm. Fresh. I ate at your big sister’s restaurant yesterday and she was serving chips they’d made the day before!”
Frisco squeezed Cam’s shoulder and took his arm back. “I’m glad you approve, mama.”
His mother laughed and said, “My not saying something doesn’t mean I approve. You’re hardheaded — you know God doesn’t approve, you know I don’t approve, and yet you’ve decided to live a life of sin anyway. You’re my son and I’ll love you no matter what, but I can’t approve.” She shrugged. “I like the boy, and I’ll accept him at family functions if it means you’ll be there, but never mistake my silence for approval.”
Frisco breathed a quiet sigh of relief and said, “Thank you.”
“Why are you thanking me?”
“For not disowning me? I was worried.”
“Oh, I have a feeling there’s much you haven’t told me, and I’ll tell you now, I don’t need to know details. If you and this boy and that girl are all doing things together? She can come to family stuff, too, but don’t feel the need to talk to me about it. God knows what you’re doing, and it’ll just have to be between you and him.”
Frisco didn’t think a loving God would have made him bisexual and then punish him for it, but he decided not to bring that point up with his mother. Not today, anyway.
* * * *
When Frisco’s mom left, Cam leaned against the wall of the kitchen and thought he might puke.
“Come to my office a second?” Frisco asked.
Cam nodded and followed him. “I’m never doing that again,” Cam said the second the door closed. “I had to come out to my own family, and I’m done. You need to come out to anyone else, you do it without me.”
Frisco pulled him into a hug and said, “I’m sorry. I won’t have to tell anyone else. Mama will tell everyone, and they’ll all come to me to either point out I’m going to burn in hell, or to congratulate me for having the balls to be myself.”
Cam let Frisco hug him, and gave him a brief kiss, but pulled away when it got too intense.
“Oh, come on, Cam. What do I have to do to…I’m glad you’re hugging and kissing me, but when do we go farther?”
Cam shook his head. “I don’t know, but right now the thought of letting you have power over me again makes me sick to my stomach.” It’d worked out okay when he’d kneeled for Frisco in the middle of the night, but part of him was terrified he’d be rebuffed and tossed to the curb once more if he kneeled for him again.
But, it was more than that. Frisco had wounded him, emotionally, when he’d thrown him out and deleted Cam from his life. He’d hurt him bad, and the thoughts of submitting to more pain from the man was too much. He’d once begged him for it, but…he just couldn’t submit to it, and sex with Frisco meant he had to submit his soul to him again.
He knew Frisco was trying, but the thoughts of surrendering his will to his former Master brought something close to a panic attack to the surface.
“I thought showing you how serious I was, by telling my mom and coming out so you and I can be together in public…” He shook his head and sank into his chair behind his desk without trying to hide his anger. “I hoped it’d make you trust me.”
Cam turned to the door, too hurt and confused to say anything.
“Where are you going?” Yeah, Frisco was pissed, but so was Cam.
“You want to put distance between us?” Cam asked. “Make a point of walking behind your desk to remind me you’re the boss? I’ll put distance between us.”
Frisco was on his feet and around the desk in no time. “I’m sorry, Cam. It wasn’t my intention, but you’re right. You hurt me when you rebuffed me again. I don’t know what else to do.”
Cam leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t know what to tell you, other than to ask for more time. I worked so hard to turn my emotions off and convince myself you were bad for me and I needed to move on…” He shrugged. “Just give it some time, please? I love having you hold me, but as soon as my cock responds it’s like I panic or something.” Or want to go throw up.
“When’s the last time you had an orgasm?”
“This morning, in the shower.”
“What were you thinking of?”
“You forcing me to fuck Cass, caning my ass when I didn’t do it the way you wanted me to.” He took a breath, focused on the floor, and added the rest. “A tight cockring, and I didn’t know if you’d let me come or not, though I had orders to get her off over and over.”
Frisco sat heavily in one of the guest chairs on the same side of the desk this time. “Nice to know I rank in your fantasies, but I wonder if you really want me, or just want someone who can facilitate your relationship with Cassie.”
Cam saw the pain in the other man’s eyes and something inside of him shifted.
Frisco was truly doing everything he could to apologize and make things right, and tonight had been a huge deal.
Cam stepped to him and ignored his racing heart and shortness of breath as he went to his knees in front of his Master. “I’m sorry, Sir,” he said with tears threatening to spill. “I don’t want you to have that impression. I love you, but I don’t know what comes next.”
Frisco leaned forward and tousled his hair. “I love you, too, boy. When’s the last time you had a good spanking or flogging?”
“Almost a month; when Cassie was in Vegas.” He looked up to see Frisco’s reaction before adding, “I went to a club in Atlanta.”
“If you need it again, promise you’ll let me know? I’ll give you what you need without sex; I just don’t want you going anywhere else.”
“Isaac said he would, too. I promise it’ll be one of you. I won’t go somewhere else.”
“Are you okay now?”
Cam shook his head. “I’m itchy for it, but I have to leave Cass too long already — for school, rehearsals, and work. I don’t want to leave her any longer than I have to.”
Frisco’s strong hand cupped his cheek, and Cam closed his eyes to try to keep from crying. “I like having you on your knees. I’ve missed it, but I don’t want you to go farther with it than you’re comfortable. Would you rather lean against my legs, or sit in a chair?”
Cam had been about to get up and sit in a chair, but when Frisco gave him the choice, he suddenly wanted nothing more than to lean against his Master’s
legs. No matter Frisco wasn’t his Master anymore.
He shifted to his bottom and leaned sideways, propped against Frisco’s legs, and it felt so damned right, a few tears spilled over and then dried up. This was where he was meant to be.
Frisco’s sigh above him told him the other man felt the same.
“I’m getting the feeling I need to fix things with Cass before you and I are going to be okay again.”
“I don’t know, Sir. Maybe?”
“She was pissed at you, at first, when she found out you’d semi-forgiven me.”
Cam nodded. “Not exactly pissed, she just couldn’t deal with it. She’s worried I’ll get hurt again, though.” Cam was terrified he’d get hurt again, but didn’t say that part.
“So, do I need to win her back before you’ll take me back all the way?”
Cam wasn’t sure what it would take, and changed the subject. “What kind of contract will we have this time, Sir?”
“I’m never going to get tired of hearing you call me Sir.” Cam’s heart slowed even more as Frisco’s hands ran through his hair. “As for your question, there are a few things I’ll want in it, but you’re trained now so our contract this time will be more of a negotiation than last time.”
“What are the things you’ll want?”
“Twenty-four / seven power exchange, with the exception of time needed for your job once you’re no longer working for me.”
Cam’s cock throbbed in his pants, but he said, “Umm, once you have the twenty-four / seven thing, it doesn’t really matter what I want.”
“Not true. You weren’t allowed many hard limits before because I needed you to experience everything. You’ll be allowed to list them this time, and make demands on whether I can play with others or not.”
“Really?” Cam looked up. “You’ll agree to only see me, and no one else, if I ask?”
Frisco nodded, his face solemn. “I will. I hope you’ll include Cass, but if she won’t have me it may not matter.”
“She isn’t ready for you to try to win her back yet.”
Frisco’s hands on his scalp felt so damned good, and Cam turned his face into his Master’s leg and started to cry for real this time. He didn’t know why, but the tears came and he didn’t want to stop them.
Frisco leaned forward and stroked his arm, and then slid to the floor and wrapped both arms around him.
He didn’t tell Cam to stop crying or to man up, he just held him and let him cry.
Cam didn’t know how long the two of them sat on the floor, but when his tears finally stopped he realized Frisco’s shirt was wet. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m glad you finally trust me enough to see your emotions. Do you want to talk about it?”
Cam shook his head against the larger man’s chest. “I love you. It terrifies me, but I want to be yours. I want Cass to be part of it, too, but if she won’t, I still want you.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Cassie wore her favorite business suit for her first day back to work. So far, the board of directors were standing behind her even though two guests had relocated to other facilities.
She had no illusions about them standing behind her on principle, though. They were keeping her because so many other guests and family members rallied around her and threatened to move to whatever facility she went to, should she be fired. Cassie had always treated patients and family members with respect and compassion, and it made her feel good to have them stand up on her behalf, now.
Oddly enough, Clemente had done her a favor by breaking into her house. The media had been hounding the BDSM angle, but had turned it into a huge gun control debate and taken the focus away from her.
Still, everyone on the planet with a television knew she’d gone to a BDSM club of her own free will. She couldn’t think about it for long without getting nauseous, but she was getting better at facing it.
At any rate, she had a huge day ahead of her and needed to keep her focus on the employees and guests. She figured there was much she’d need to address and fix on her first day back, and she had to be ready for whatever came at her.
Marcus promised he’d have a donut cushion in her seat so she wouldn’t have to walk into the building with it.
She wasn’t sure she’d last the whole day, but it was time she tried. They’d planned it for a day Marcus would be in residence, in case she couldn’t handle it and broke down.
The morning went well, and Cassie remembered she enjoyed solving problems and making sure everything sailed along on smooth waters. Marcus joined her in her office for lunch, and the two talked about how the day was going so far. She was grateful he didn’t press her to talk about the difficult stuff, and when he left to return to his office, she called Cam.
“Hey, you wanted me to call to let you know how things are going.”
“I did. Are you okay?”
“Yes. Coming back to work was exactly what I needed. How did you do on your test this morning?”
“I’m pretty sure I aced it. I knew the answers, but I’ll have to wait to get it back to know for sure. I have rehearsal until nine o’clock, maybe we can chill out and watch a movie when I get home?”
* * * *
Cam finished the call, tossed his phone into the passenger seat beside him, and wondered why he hadn’t told her he was on his way to Isaac’s. He had no secrets from her, and would tell her later, so why hadn’t he told her now?
Maybe because he didn’t want to give her anything to stress over at work? But why would she stress?
Damn, the four of them needed to sit down and talk, figure out some ground rules.
But today, he needed.
His pulse raced as he pulled into Isaac’s driveway. He’d been told the entire afternoon would be in power exchange, with the same rules he’d had during his time here when Frisco had been out of town.
With the exception of his chastity device, of course, since there was no one to lock him into it before arriving.
He had it with him, but he didn’t know if Isaac would require it or not. He hoped not, but would accept whatever the Dom decided.
Cam went to the back door, stepped into the kitchen, and removed his clothes. He’d left his gun locked in his glove compartment so he didn’t have to worry about dealing with it.
He stepped into the living room and stayed quiet as he kneeled at Isaac’s feet without looking him in the face.
Isaac ignored him for several long minutes, but finally leaned forward, his presence sucking the oxygen from the room as he said, “Look up, boy.”
Cam’s heart skipped a beat as his gaze met Isaac’s. He had no idea how Isaac managed to look so kind and so damned scary at the same time.
“What do you want? Why are you here?” Isaac asked.
Well, that was different. He’d never asked those questions when he’d taken care of him for Frisco. Cam considered his answer, licked his lips, and said, “I want pain, Sir. I need to be dominated, and used. I need to belong to someone in every way, even if only for a few hours.”
“When you came to me before, Frisco gave me permission to use your ass. I need your consent today.”
“I’m yours, Sir, to use however you wish.”
“Tell me your hard limits.”
“No blindfolds or complete darkness, no scat, no permanent marks or actual injury, no gun play, and if you draw blood please take precautions against infection.”
“I’ll agree to all of those today. Anything else?”
“No Sir.”
Isaac smiled, and Cam saw the sadist peeking out. “Good. It’s been a while since I had a blank canvas to mark up. Go to my bedroom and put on the wrist and ankle cuffs. If you aren’t sure of your control, please wear a cock ring. You don’t want to give me a reason to punish you today, so decide carefully.”
Cam swallowed. “Yes, Sir.”
“If you finish before I make it in there, kneel and wait for me.”
Cam considered Isaac’s direc
tives as he buckled the wrist and ankle cuffs, but in the end decided to trust his training. True, he hadn’t been in an intense scene in a while, but Frisco had thoroughly trained him and he trusted the education would stick.
Anticipation had him rock hard when Isaac entered the room, looked as his cock and asked, “You’re sure?”
Cam nodded and Isaac tossed him a condom. “Put this on, then. If you have an accident I don’t want it on my carpet or bed.”
Isaac situated him standing at the bottom of the bed, arms stretched and bound sideways between the two supports, his legs spread wide, and facing towards Isaac. He’d hoped to get his back and ass flogged, but would accept whatever he was given.
Restrained, out of control, and at the mercy of someone he trusted? Such a rush, and he didn’t want to be in control.
And the condom to remind him an orgasm would be seen as making a mess?
His cock was fucking throbbing, and he was so hard it hurt.
He closed his eyes and let himself sink into the sensation as Isaac ran a finger from Cam’s chin to his belly button, and then traced the spaces between his ab muscles. “Tell me your safeword again, boy.”
“Arabesque, Sir.”’
Isaac kept tracing the lines of Cam’s muscle and sinew. “I’ve always considered myself heterosexual, but flexible about who I topped. I’ve never been interested in sex with a man before, other than as a way to Dominate them, but my mindset’s changed as I’ve gotten to know you.”
He cupped Cam’s chin, waited until he’d opened his eyes. “I don’t know what’s going to happen. It’s been a while since I’ve had a submissive I could turn loose on, someone capable of taking what I want to give, so it may be rough. You said you wanted pain, though, and I’m taking you at your word.”
“Thank you, Sir.”
Isaac flogged Cams chest, abs, cock, balls, and thighs. He tore the condom off with the flogger and said they’d put another one on later.
Safeword: Arabesque (Safewords Book 9) Page 23