My heart stops sinking because it hits the pit of my stomach.
“Chloe, are you still there?”
I nod at the phone, but I know she can’t hear me. I can’t get the words out of my mouth. In my gut I know something isn’t right, but I don’t know how to respond to her right now.
“I’m sorry for telling you this way, but there was an accident, Chloe. Your parents didn’t make it—“
I don’t even hear anything else that she tells me. All of the air leaves my body. My face gets wetter and wetter, but I don’t actually feel as if I’m in my body anymore. I feel as if I’m traveling higher and higher, away from my body.
I feel like I’m watching it all in slow motion as the Jeep swerves on the road and slams into a tree. My body flies forward and slams into the steering wheel before falling back into my seat. I spot Flynn and Hudson charging toward us. Oddly, it occurs to me that must have been the text Ashtyn sent.
There’s gut-wrenching screaming coming from somewhere, and I look over and notice Ashtyn crumpled at an awkward angle. It’s only then that I realize the screaming is coming from me and I can’t stop. I’m vaguely aware of someone trying to get my attention and pulling me out of the car. It’s almost as if I’m two separate people right now: the one coherent about her surroundings, and the other who can’t quite connect and is a full-blown mess.
My arm suddenly burns with a sharp pain, and my disconnect starts coming back together. Rather than stick around and watch everything unfold, I start to close my eyes, and I see Hudson’s broken face before I shut them and allow the darkness to pull me under.
Chapter 1
Chloe
One Month Later
Drinking all night long always sounds like a good idea at the time. Not so much when you wake up to the bright and fucking shiny sun to remind you of the mistakes from the night before. For example, my clumpy mascara and my black eyeliner are caked and crusty, making it difficult to open my eyes, my mouth tastes like I drank a gallon of vomit rather than expelled it, and there’s an unknown piece of man meat currently trapping my body.
I hope this isn’t going to be a coyote ugly moment.
Carefully, but not so gracefully, I attempt to wiggle free. Said man meat lets out a muffled groan and continues to spoon me even tighter. The muscular arm holding me down is hopefully a good sign of an attractive guy wrapped around me. Letting out an exasperated sigh, I turn slightly to see what kind of a situation I need to work myself out of. I hold my breath in anticipation until I see Hudson’s floppy mess of sandy blond hair.
He looks kind of cute while he’s sleeping. So innocent and not a care in the world. His entire face breaks out into a giant grin; he must be having quite the dream. If I hadn’t seen his face, the very obvious thing poking me in my butt would have let me know. And with that, I don’t even care about waking him up; I jump up and out of bed.
Grumbling, he looks over at the clock and back at me. “Chloe, it’s five in the morning. Why the hell are you up?”
Getting my wits about me, I’m suddenly a little dizzy and sit back down on the edge of the bed. “If you must know, Little Hudson decided to make his presence quite known this morning, and right into my ass crack. I don’t know about you, but that’s an exit only zone.”
He lets out a small chuckle. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t just call my dick Little Hudson. And I had no intentions of sticking it anywhere, because I was in a deep sleep. Now, please, can we sleep for a little bit longer before we absolutely have to get up for school?”
Shit. I forgot about school. First day of senior year.
It’s funny how you can have an idea in your mind for your entire life what this day would look like. Brand new wardrobe, a great tan from being beachside all summer long, and your parents to wish you luck on your first day. Of course all that went to shit the moment my parents died.
Not much matters anymore. This is just another day, in another year of my miserable life. Or at least it is now. If there were any liquor around, I’d drink to that. Instead I’ll just comply with Hudson’s wishes and climb back into bed. He pulls me toward him and wraps his muscular arms back around my body.
I sigh into his chest. “You know, one of these days, you’re going to have to stop taking care of me. You’ll start giving the ladies the wrong idea.”
“No way. And give up on sharing my bed with a hot babe every night?”
I roll my eyes. “C’mon, Hudson, I know you’d rather be getting laid than snuggling with a drunken mess. I’m not your responsibility. You can stop taking care of me.”
Leaning toward me, he kisses my forehead and gazes into my eyes. “Nobody is forcing me to do anything. I’m here because I want to be and I don’t give a shit what anybody else thinks about it. Now close your eyes and go back to sleep. We have to be up in an hour anyway.”
I have no intentions of going to sleep, but I don’t tell him that. As his breathing evens out, I contemplate how I even got here. I went from a near perfect life to a fucked up one. Life can be real hilarious sometimes; I just wonder what I did that made it want to play this game with me.
It’s mocking me and saying, Hey, Chloe, nobody gets perfection. Everyone needs a little drama and suffering in his or her life.
You know what, though? Joke’s on you, life. At this point I don’t even give a shit anymore. I’m going through the motions, but honestly, nothing even matters anymore. How’s that for a little cynical life contemplation on my first day of my last year of high school?
Happy fucking senior year, Chloe.
I don’t know when it started, but I notice tears are dripping down my face. Hudson must not have been asleep like I thought he was. He pulls me in tighter, and I let everything loose. My entire body wracks with the sobs I’d been holding back, and I don’t understand how there are any left in me.
All I’ve done is cry.
Every day since the day they died. So far, Hudson is the only person I’ve let see me cry. Not even Ashtyn knows what I’m going through. She’s my best friend, cradle to the grave and all of that nonsense. I’m sure she has an idea, but she hasn’t heard it from me. She also hasn’t seen me either. I went straight from the hospital to Hudson’s house. Her dad and sister came up from Santa Barbara after the accident, and they’re staying for good. No more divorce, just one big happy family, and I can’t bear to be around that right now.
I know Hudson’s been updating Ashtyn, but he doesn’t want me to know, so I haven’t said anything. If they want to keep it a secret from me, then so be it. I don’t care either way.
Snuggling into his chest, I hold on to him for dear life and hope he never lets me go. He’s been my comfort through the storm that is my life. I shouldn’t lean on him, but I’m so damn selfish right now. I’m falling apart and hanging by a thread. Hudson is the only one keeping me going day in and day out.
One of these days, I’ll need to acknowledge my disastrous life. Today will not be that day. Today I will take one step at a time and just try to get through it without breaking down. Maybe tomorrow or the next day, but not today. Definitely not today.
An hour later, as if on cue, the alarm on Hudson’s phone goes off. It’s blaring some song that I don’t recognize. Grumbling, he rolls over and shuts off the alarm before returning and snuggling back into me. I shouldn’t be enjoying the feel of his strong muscular arms around my body, but it’s hard not to. I feel safe and protected with him, and he’s about the only person who makes me feel that way lately. “How can you have your alarm set to music? I think that would annoy the shit out of me.”
“Well, if it annoyed you, wouldn’t that help you wake up?”
I contemplate that for a minute before answering. “Nope, I’d just shut the song off and roll back over and go back to sleep.”
“You don’t know how an alarm works, do you?”
I just giggle. I’ve never liked getting up early. I would always hit the snooze button over and over. Eventually, Mom would have to drag me ou
t of bed. It never took much effort on her part, because she’d bring with her a skinny vanilla latte from Starbucks. I push that thought to the back of my mind. I don’t want to bring that pain and emotion up right now. Instead, I change the subject. “So, what was that song that was playing? I mean, yeah, it was kind of loud and annoying, but I kind of liked the sound of it.”
He rolls over and looks at his phone. “I don’t have a song set for my ringtone. It just plays a random song from my music selection. It looks like this morning we heard ‘Right Where We Belong’ by Boymeetsworld.”
“I’ve never heard of them before.” I think about that for a minute because I never seem to know any of the music that Ashtyn or the guys listen to. “Should I have? Are they connected to that old nineties TV show or something?”
He chuckles. “No, pretty girl, there’s no reason for you to have heard of these guys. They’re an unsigned band. And they don’t have anything to do with the show, either.”
“Then how do you know who they are?”
“I saw them at Warped Tour in Portland last year. They’re pretty good. I have a feeling they’ll be signed soon though.”
“Well, aren’t you just an expert on unknown bands.”
“Something like that.”
I turn over so we’re facing each other and just get lost in his ocean-blue eyes. Some days I wish I had talked to Hudson first instead of Jax. Maybe things would be different right now. Maybe they wouldn’t be. I don’t know. I reach my hand up and run my fingers through his soft hair. He has a little bed head, but it looks so adorable on him. It’s just long enough to have something to grab on to. I tug it slightly and he lets out a little groan before rolling onto his back. “Why do we have to go to school again? We could just lay in bed all day and never get up.”
I laugh softly. Hudson is not the type to just ditch school, especially on the first day. He hasn’t said anything to me, but I know he’s excited for today. I get the feeling Hudson’s pretty popular. Then again, he and Jax did go to school together for a couple years, and I can pretty much guarantee Jax was the king of that school. It would have been interesting to know him back then. Back before that bitch broke his heart. I’m curious to know what she’s like. Apparently her older brother owns the record label they signed with, so I’m sure I’ll meet her at some point. That will be quite the conversation.
I flop myself onto his chest so we’re face to face again. Little Hudson isn’t currently present, or else this would make for an even more awkward situation. I look up at Hudson and he’s beaming down at me. “You know, I would be perfectly fine with skipping the day.” I ground myself down into him a little. “I could think of something a lot more fun we could do today. Hell, I would be fine with skipping the year. You were supposed to finish this year online anyway. Why don’t we just do that?”
After the accident, Flynn threw a huge fit, or so I hear. He told Oliver, the owner of the label that signed their band, that there was no way he would move and leave Ashtyn behind. So Ashtyn got her way and Flynn isn’t leaving, Hudson gets to finish his senior year with his friends, and I’m not really sure where that leaves me. If this were before, I would be ecstatic, but I just can’t find the desire to feel much of anything these days.
He shakes his head slightly and presses his lips together in a slight grimace, almost as if he’s in pain. He looks around the room before finally falling back onto me. “I don’t think that would be good for you. We need to get out of this room and have some human interaction. I know I haven’t talked about it, but I’m looking forward to this year, and I want to graduate with my friends.”
He’s been coddling me so much lately he couldn’t even tell me he was excited for his senior year. Sure, I’m not, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be. I’m fucking miserable and making life for everyone around me just as depressing. I should just go to Kansas and be miserable with my grandma. At least that way Hudson wouldn’t have to take care of me, and he could find himself a girlfriend and be happy.
I’m not even going to think about why that thought knots up my stomach.
Turning to look up at him, I say, “You should enjoy your senior year. I don’t know why I’m even here anymore. I’m not even talking to Ashtyn, and her parents are supposed to be my guardians. I should just go to Kansas and get out of everyone’s hair.”
He places his finger on my lip and says, “Don’t even talk like that. You aren’t in anyone’s hair. If you left, then I wouldn’t enjoy my senior year. So stop acting this way. I want you here, Chloe. I don’t want you to be anywhere else but here in my arms. I’m content with never letting you go.”
His ears turn pink with his admission, and I wish things were easier. I contemplate leaning up and pressing my lips to his. I could easily lift my hand and run it through his hair and down his face. We could both give into the tension radiating off of our bodies and let go. Biting my lower lip, I look up into his eyes and I’m blasted with the desire shooting from them. As if on cue, Little Hudson comes to attention and breaks me out of the daze I was in. “Do you want to take a shower first or should I?” The third option is hanging out there, left unsaid.
Clearing his throat, he closes his eyes as if in pain. “I’ll jump in the shower real quick. Let you relax a little bit longer or whatever. I can just get out of your hair so you can take as long as you need to get ready.”
He jumps up and rushes into his en suite bathroom and shuts the door. I roll over and throw myself back onto the pillows. My whole body smells like Hudson, and I don’t want to get in the shower and wash him off me. I’d rather walk around with him wrapped around me for the day. It will be like I’m not going at this alone. Ugh, that makes me sound like a crazy person. I guess at this point I’m pretty fucking crazy. I should just go with it.
I should shower. Maybe I can catch him by surprise and jump in with him? A way to distract me from the horrible day we’re embarking on. Plus, a little morning sex never hurt anybody. I don’t even have the chance to contemplate further. He whips the door open and comes walking out. If his hair weren’t wet, I would assume he didn’t even shower while he was in there. I can’t help myself as I sit up and trail his body from head to toe. His tight t-shirt is clinging to his body and leaving little to the imagination. Beating the shit out of drums builds up some great upper body muscles.
“Hey, I’m done. I’m going to get some coffee. Just meet me downstairs in the kitchen whenever you’re ready.” He leaves the room before I have the chance to respond. I’m left blinking and feeling like the clock skipped ahead without me noticing. I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and grudgingly tromp to the shower. The sooner this day starts, the sooner it can end. Fortunately, I’m done with the community service that I had to do after the accident. Hudson’s dad worked out a deal for me since I got the phone call while I was driving, but the fact that I had been drinking underage did not go unnoticed. His dad is a miracle worker. Besides the community service, I got off with a warning, but if I get any tickets or accidents in the next year, my license is gone. Since I don’t have a car of my own, that shouldn’t be a problem.
Chapter 2
Hudson
After the morning we had, I figure the best way to get through the day is a monstrous pot of coffee. I leave Chloe in my room to shower and get ready. Of course that was after taking the shortest and coldest shower of my life. The idea was to shock my body out of its stupor, and tame Little Hudson, as Chloe called my dick. I could deal with the only thing standing between Chloe and me being Jax. But her parents dying, I can’t cross that bridge. She needs a friend, not some horny guy wanting to get in her pants. But I’m not just a horny guy, and it’s so much more than that.
When Ashtyn brought her best friend from out of town to our house that first night, I was a goner. Of course she set her sights on Jax from the beginning, but she didn’t spend every minute with him.
“What are you doing down here all by yourself?”
I jump half a
foot in the air and fall off my stool. “Holy shit.” Turning around, I see Chloe standing by the door with her hand over her mouth, trying to hold in a laugh.
“I’m…sorry…I didn’t mean to scare you,” she spits out in between giggles.
I puff out my chest all macho-like. “You didn’t scare me.”
She nods her head in agreement, but her eyes tell me otherwise. “So, what are you doing down here?”
I rub the back of my neck as I stand up and motion her over to me. “Come here. I’ll show you.” She tilts her head to the side but walks over anyway. Sitting her down on my stool, I pick up the drumsticks and place them in her hands. “I like to come down here and play random beats. It’s fun to not focus on making anything. That’s usually when I come up with my best stuff.”
Her gaze trails up and down the sticks in her hands. With a shrug of her shoulders, she starts beating the shit out of the drums. She has no idea what she’s doing, but judging by the laughs leaving her mouth, she’s having the time of her life. After about thirty seconds, she drops the sticks and leans herself back into my chest. “How can you do that for so long? My arms are burning.”
“Lots and lots of practice. That and I don’t aimlessly hit the drums like a crazy person.”
She spins around on the stool. “You did not just call me crazy.” I open my mouth, and my words get caught in my throat. My heart starts racing and she starts grinning like crazy. “I’m kidding. I was beating the shit out of your drums.” She brings her hands up to my face and lets out a small gasp at the contact. Biting her bottom lip, she pulls my face down to hers and I lay my forehead against her own.
“You’re Jax’s girl.”
She leans back, and her ocean-blue eyes are burning with desire. “I’m nobody’s anything.” Instead of leaning back in for that almost-kiss, she gets up and leaves me frustrated, confused, and alone.
Down in the kitchen, I find Jax, luckily alone. He never cared about flaunting his latest conquests around, but since Chloe has been staying here, I haven’t seen a single one. I’m extremely grateful, and I wonder if he even knows he’s doing it. “Hey man, what are you doing up so early?”
Falling for Hudson (Marlowe series Book 2) Page 2