Christ, she was killing me. She was so genuine about her grief that some protective instinct reared up from deep within me, having been buried in darkness since I lost Addy. It was right then that I wanted nothing more than to give her what she needed. And what she needed most was a friend. In the back of my mind I questioned why she didn’t go to Eliza with everything that was hurting her, but the knowledge that I was the only one she felt comfortable turning to felt way too fucking good. I could push my own insecurities, my own demons, back in order to provide her with that.
“Lilly,” I cut in, stopping her mid-rant, “I’d love to be your friend.”
Her eyes went wide with shock. “Wait. What?”
I grinned down at her because she was too fucking cute. “I said I want to be your friend.”
She bit into that plump bottom lip of hers and my blood started to roar. “Really?”
Friends, friends, friends, I chanted to myself. She needs a friend, asshole, and you need to get your goddamned head straight. I took a step closer, lowering my voice so the sincerity of my words would shine through. “Really.”
I barely had a chance to get the word out before she launched herself at me and squeezed my neck tighter than I thought someone her size was capable of. “Thank you.”
Those two heartfelt, whispered words made my stomach clench at the same time feeling her pressed against me made my skin tingle. Slowly, cautiously, I put my arms around her and returned the hug as she continued to whisper.
“I know I probably seem crazy right now, but that means a lot, Quinn. I really need a friend right now.”
My arms clenched at that declaration. “You need me, I’m here. Any time.”
Lilly sniffled and pulled away, rubbing the back of her hand across her cheek and alerting me to the relieved tears she’d just shed. “I should go,” she said, only this time there was no awkwardness, no uncertainty. She was leaving with a smile on her face. A smile that I managed to somehow put there. That knowledge made me feel unbelievably fucking fantastic. “I’ll see you at Sophia’s next class.”
“See you then.” I lifted my hand and waved as she climbed in the car, started it up, and backed out of the space.
Friends. I could do that.
Or at least I hoped like hell that I could.
Lilly
I WAS STANDING in the café downstairs, having just ordered my first coffee of the morning, when I heard the terrifying sound.
“Ms. Lilly! Ms. Lilly! Ms. Lilly!”
I spun around from the counter at Sinful Sweets with my heart in my throat at the sound of Sophia’s screams. The first thought that popped into my head was that she was hurt, the second one was that she was dying. There was no reason for a child to scream like that unless it was a life-or-death situation.
That was, until I heard Quinn’s deep, familiar voice following right after. “Jesus Christ, Sophia. What have I told you about screaming like that?”
“Sorry. I got excited.”
My wide-eyed gaze finally landed on the two of them, just coming through the door to the café. Sophia looked chastised, but not hurt, thank God, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t just taken years off my life.
“Good Lord,” I breathed, putting my hand to my chest to prevent my heart from bursting through. “I thought she was really hurt. I almost had a heart attack.”
Quinn rubbed a hand over his face, and my eyes instantly focused in on the sexy blond stubble that covered his square jaw. “I’m really sorry about that,” he said, looking around the café in embarrassment. He put his hand on Sophia’s head and ruffled her hair. “We’re working on our inside voice… but it’s slow going. Believe me, she’s taken years off my life with that scream of hers.”
I giggled as I looked down at an unapologetic Sophia. “I bet.”
“Sorry for scarin’ you, Ms. Lilly,” she stated, not sounding apologetic in the slightest. “But I saw you through the window and wanted to invite you to my birthday party!”
I turned my smile on Quinn. It had been two weeks since we agreed to be friends, and in that time, things had been great. It really was nice to have someone around to help take my mind off things. With our work schedules we didn’t see each other regularly, but we did text. And on the days he dropped off and picked up Sophia for dance class, he always hung around to chat for a while. It was nice. That connection I felt was still there, just as strong as before, but I had a friend in Quinn so I wasn’t going to do anything to jeopardize that. We were slowly getting to know each other. He was giving me exactly what I needed during a difficult time in my life, and I was eternally grateful for that.
I wasn’t going to ruin it by falling for someone who was so clearly unobtainable, no matter how much I was growing to like him.
I squatted down in front of Sophia and took the invitation from her extended hand. “A birthday party, huh? Will there be cake?”
I hadn’t thought it was possible for her to look any more excited than she already had, but clearly I was wrong. “Yep! Ms. Chloe’s makin’ me a humongous princess cake! It’s gonna be as big as our house!” She held her hands high in the air in an attempt to show how big it was going to be.
“Wow! That’s really big.”
“Uh huh. And I’ll even let you have two pieces!”
I forced my eyes to go wide, mimicking her exuberance. “Two pieces? Well, then I have to come. I wouldn’t miss your birthday for the world, Little Miss. Even if I was only getting one piece of cake.”
She squealed loud enough to burst my ear drum before launching herself into me and wrapping her arms around my neck. “Yay! It’s gonna be so fun! I can’t wait!”
I looped my arms around her and stood up, keeping her tiny body propped on my hip for support. In the weeks Sophia had been in my class, I’d grown to adore the little girl. Her exuberance was infectious. She was so generous with her affection that it was impossible not to fall for her. “I can’t wait either, sweetie.”
She offered me up a smile that would have made her look exactly like her dad if his own smiles ever reached his eyes. I could almost picture Quinn’s full-fledged grin in my head, and it caused a pain to shoot through my chest. I would kill to see a smile like that from him.
“Great,” Quinn spoke up, pulling my and Sophia’s attention in his direction. “Then we’ll see you this weekend?”
“Absolutely.”
He smiled… and it came so close to reaching his eyes that I was suddenly determined to make it happen one day soon. “All right, Angel. It’s time for school.” He reached his arms out and Sophia all but threw herself at him. Man, seeing him with her really was dangerous to the female population.
“Bye, Ms. Lilly!” Sophia shouted, as Quinn carried her toward the door.
“By, honey.” I waved, as Quinn turned to look over his shoulder, shooting me a wink before disappearing outside and out of sight.
A wink. It was quick, there and gone in the blink of an eye. But damn if that one simple wink wasn’t potent as hell.
Friends. You’re just friends, my brain screamed.
If only my body would get on board.
AS I MADE my way to Quinn’s front door, my palms grew clammy. My fingers tightened around Sophia’s present, the wrapping paper crinkling under my touch as I held tighter to not drop it. I wasn’t sure why I was nervous, but there was no denying I was. I told myself that it was because of all the cars lining the street in front of his house; the loud sounds of the party coming from his back yard. I told myself it was because I wasn’t a huge fan of crowds since I’d always been somewhat of a loner. But I knew that wasn’t it.
For some reason the thought of seeing Quinn totally in his element, surrounded by family and friends, left me feeling off-balance. Normally our interactions took place in or around my dance school. That was my territory. Today, right now, I was firmly in his. And without Eliza, or even Ethan, here the only friend in attendance was Quinn.
Sure, I knew the people of this town pr
etty well, but, with the exception of maybe Kyle, one of my dance teachers at the school, most of them were acquaintances at best.
Pulling in a fortifying breath, I steeled my spine, shoved my nerves aside, and rang the doorbell. It took several seconds before I heard the familiar sound of the deadbolt twisting, and a moment later, the door swung open, revealing a very attractive, somewhat familiar-looking, blonde woman who appeared to be in her early-to-mid fifties.
“Hello,” she said with a kind smile. “Are you here for the party?”
I shifted the present in my arms to free up a hand to shake the one she offered. “Yeah, hi. I’m—”
“Lilly,” she finished for me. “Sophia’s dance teacher. I know all about you. I’m Eve Mallick, her grandmother.”
Well that explained the recognition. Not only did she look just like Quinn and Sophia, but I’d seen her in passing a time or two getting Sophia to and from class on the days Quinn was working at the station.
“Nice to officially meet you.” I smiled and released her hand, allowing her to move to the side and let me in.
“Nice to meet you too. Sophia can’t stop talking about how much she loves your class.” She led me down a hallway that extended from the front of the house to the back. I caught glimpses of the other rooms off the hall; the living room, a study, what looked like a little girl’s playroom. They were just cursory glances, but from what I could see, Quinn had done a fantastic job of making a comfortable home for himself and Sophia.
“I love having her in there,” I continued as we came to a stop in the kitchen, the large wooden dining room table nearly groaning with brightly wrapped presents. I placed mine down and turned to face Quinn’s mother. “She’s a lively one.”
Eve laughed. “That’s a good way of putting it. The girl’s wild. Definitely gives her father a run for his money. I didn’t think it was possible for a kid to be more hyper than Quinn was when he was a boy, but Sophia managed to top him.”
“Ah.” I giggled. “Karma at work.”
“Oh, absolutely! And well-deserved. I’ve been dying my hair since I was thirty-two because of him. It’s only fair he has a taste of his own medicine.”
“My mom says my time’s coming.”
“Smart woman.”
The sound of kids yelling and laughing pulled my attention to the back door just as it opened and Quinn appeared, looking flustered and exhausted. “Mom, if we don’t cut that cake soon, they’re going to riot.”
At that, I let out a full-blown laugh. His head jerked toward me and surprise registered across his handsome face. “Lilly. I didn’t know you were in here.”
“Just got here.”
Eve moved around the kitchen, pulling the fridge door open and unearthing a large cake box. “I had to let her in, that’s why I haven’t gotten the cake out yet. It’ll just be a few minutes.”
“Why don’t…” He trailed off and pulled in a deep breath, like he was trying to calm himself. “I’ll take care of the cake. Why don’t you go help wrangle all the kids?”
Eve gave him a look I couldn’t quite decipher but didn’t say a word as she headed out into the back yard. As soon as the door closed behind her, Quinn propped his hands on the kitchen counter, dropped his head, and sighed.
“Hey,” I said softly, coming up behind him. “You okay?”
He didn’t bother to move. “Yeah, I’m good. You should get out there. Lilly’s been asking for you.”
Those familiar shutters started to come down. I opened my mouth to speak, to try and get him to confide in me, but the backdoor opened again, letting in screams of all the kids.
“Quinn?”
His head shot in the direction of the voice, and there was no missing the way his back went rigid. For the life of me, I couldn’t understand his reaction to the pretty, middle-aged brunette woman standing in the doorway. And what was even more confusing was the fact that she looked just as uncomfortable as him. She wrung her hands in front of her as she continued speaking. “Sophia sent me to find you.”
He moved to the cake box and lifted the cake out, setting it on the counter so he could put the candles on the top tier. It was as if he was doing everything in his power not to make eye contact. “Almost finished,” he stated in a flat voice. “I’ll be right out.”
She looked like she wanted to say more, but forced herself to remain quiet. Moving her gaze to the floor, she whispered, “Okay.” It was almost painful to watch. It was so obvious that, whoever she was, she wanted to reach out to him, but he was just as closed off with her as he was with anyone else.
Suddenly Sophia’s loud, shouting voice came echoing into the kitchen. “Grandma! Where’s Daddy?” Sophia barreled up next to the woman in the doorway and wrapped her arms around her legs, causing the air to freeze in my lungs.
Grandma. Oh, God. His wife’s mother.
Quinn offered Sophia a tense, tight smile. “I’ll be right out, Angel.”
Sophia’s eyes finally landed on me, and her smile nearly enveloped her entire face. “Miss Lilly!” She disengaged from her grandmother and came at me.
I returned her hug, loving how genuine it felt every single time. “Hey, Little Miss. Happy birthday.”
“Thanks! You wanna come outside with me? I can show you my piñata!”
I looked from her to Quinn, and back again. “Give me just a second, sweetie. I’m going to help your daddy get everything ready.”
Sophia headed back toward the door, back to her grandmother. The woman smiled down at Sophia and reached for her hand. “Come on, sweet girl. Why don’t we get everyone to sit down so we can serve up the cake?”
Lilly
“I’VE GOT THIS. You can just head outside.”
I narrowed my eyes at Quinn. There was something weighing heavily on him, something he was determined to handle all by himself, even though I was standing right there, ready and more than willing to be a shoulder for him to lean on. We were friends. Friends helped each other.
And I was going to help him whether he wanted it or not, damn it!
I slid my purse off my shoulder and hooked it onto the back of one of the dining room chairs. The princess-designed paper plates and napkins were stacked on the end of the counter, so I grabbed everything and moved to hold the back door open for Quinn as he headed that way with the cake. As soon as he got close enough, just a handful of inches away from me, I lowered my voice and spoke adamantly.
“I’m helping you, so get over it. That’s what friends do. There’s clearly something wrong, and if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine, but I’m helping. Don’t bother fighting me on it because I’ll win. And I’m not above recruiting any damn person at this party to do so, you got me?”
His green eyes flickered, the dullness from seconds ago slowly creeping out of them as he gave me a tiny smirk. “You finished?”
I paused just long enough to consider his question. “Yeah. If you don’t force my hand, I’m finished.”
His smirk grew just a bit more. “No forcing necessary. You made your point and I accept it. But this cake’s pretty fucking heavy, so if you don’t mind…” He tipped his chin in the direction of the picnic table all the children were crowded around.
“Oh! Yeah, I got it.” I stepped out of the way and let him through. Just as he cleared the doorway, he turned to look back over his shoulder.
“Hey, Lilly?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m glad you’re here. Really glad.”
My knees grew a little weak, but somehow I managed to get the plates and napkins to the table without completely melting into a puddle of goo.
Quinn just seemed to have that effect on me.
THE CAKE HAD been served before any of the kids went into shock from waiting. As soon as that was over, Sophia dove into the pile of presents Quinn and his father had moved outside. A few of the mothers from the dance school came up to say hello during that time, but mostly, I stood on the periphery, comfortable enough as an observer
. I was having too much fun watching Sophia’s face light up with every single present she opened. I didn’t need to force myself into the very center of it all like some of the other mothers there.
If it hadn’t sent a spike of jealousy through me, I probably would have laughed at the number of women who were unnecessarily helpful, overly touchy. It wasn’t like I could blame them, really. Quinn was undeniably attractive. Any single, hot-blooded woman would want him, myself included. We were just friends, but that didn’t make watching those women flirt any easier.
The only good thing about it was that Quinn didn’t seem interested in the slightest. He smiled that smile that didn’t come near his eyes, laughed when the situation warranted. But it was clear — to those watching closely — that he didn’t return their attention.
Just as that thought occurred to me, I was hit with another, more unpleasant one. He wasn’t interested in any woman. Myself included.
It wasn’t like I didn’t already know that, but the reminder didn’t hurt any less.
Just friends. Just friends. Just friends.
The sound of Sophia’s voice pulled me out of my head and back into reality. “Ms. Lilly! This one’s from you!”
I smiled from a distance as she held up the wrapped present I brought. Then my heart gave a little jump when Quinn waved me over and added, “Come over here.”
My cheeks heated as I picked my way through the crowd of unhappy-looking mothers to get to Quinn and Sophia’s side. Quinn leaned in so close I could feel his breath across my neck as he whispered, “What are you doing all the way over there?”
I tried not to shiver as Sophia ripped into the wrapping paper. “Just watching. Didn’t want to be in the way,” I whispered back.
One corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk as he turned back to his daughter, muttering, “Impossible,” under his breath.
I really was going to melt into a pile of goo if he didn’t stop. Luckily, Sophia’s high-pitched squeak distracted me from Quinn’s potency and turned our attention back to her.
A Broken Soul (The Pembrooke Series Book 3) Page 7