Shoving my stupid thoughts aside, I got out of my Volkswagen and headed for my front door, stopping for a moment to gather my composure, what I was about to do scaring the hell out of me. How would Markus react? Would he yell at me or try to talk me out of my decision? I had no idea, which just showed how much I’d lost touch with him.
Scraping up some courage, I opened the front door and stepped inside, stopping at the sight of Markus sitting on the couch. He had his hands in his blond hair, and was glaring down at the floor, his blue eyes burning holes in it, his angry mood amplifying my nerves.
“What’s wrong, Markus?”
His head snapped up at my voice. “You,” he spat.
I blinked in surprise. “Why?”
He pushed to his feet, his body practically vibrating with fury. “After everything I told you, after everything I went through, you’ve been having an affair with a student?”
My eyes widened, shocked he knew. How did he find out? The sight of him walking away from...
Syn!
Since my father knew about my affair, Syn probably did too.
Markus walked towards me, the tautness of his body almost threatening. I backed up, my heart slamming against my chest.
He stopped a few paces away, glaring down at me with disgust. “All this time I’ve been talking about this girl who’s been harassing me, you,” he pointed a finger at me, “have been fucking a fifteen-year-old boy.”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.
He looked at me incredulously. “You’re not even gonna deny it?”
My mouth moved, but again, nothing came out, shock muting me.
He shook his head, his bright blue eyes a thunderous storm of emotions. “I thought maybe it was a lie, slander like what was done to me, but this,” he waved a hand at me, “your behaviour, it all makes sense now. All that time you stayed behind at school, insisting you preferred to work at your desk, you were fucking that kid.”
“I...”
“Don’t talk!”
I jolted.
“I can’t believe anything that comes out of your mouth. You’ve been lying to me this whole time, going behind my back, neglecting me, not giving a shit that it was screwing with my head. And what happened today ... the assault,” he said, flooring me he knew about it, my mind in a whirlwind of confusion. “That was the boy you’re having the affair with.”
“How do you know?” I croaked out, wondering whether Principal Sao had rung him.
“The boy’s uncle.”
I blinked at him. “What uncle?”
“A massive gang member.”
“Mr. Rakete?”
“Don’t ask questions when you already know the answer!”
“I didn’t know he was Dante’s uncle, and that man doesn’t understand—”
“He understands plenty!”
I jolted again, my body now a livewire.
He continued, his voice filled with venom. “He saw you leave his nephew’s house. He said he approached you, catching you out on a lie as to why you were there. He also said he tried to get you to stop seeing this kid, but you refused to. That’s where you’ve been all afternoon—with this boy.”
“Yes,” I pushed out, tears prickling at my eyes. This was it, this was what I’d been fearing. It was out. There was no way of denying it now.
“He’s fifteen!” Markus yelled.
I dropped my gaze, the last word sending shame through me.
He continued, “And now Child Welfare’s going to take him away from his family, and all ’cause of you.”
My head whipped up. “It’s not because of me.”
“It is! This kid’s uncle said he tried to tell the principal it wasn’t an assault, but the man refused to believe him. Which means, this boy’s going to be ripped away from his family, and all because they think he forced himself onto you.”
“It was a misunderstanding. I told the principal that.”
He sneered at me. “The only misunderstanding is that I thought you were a loving wife, a fantastic person, who cared about kids, not abused them.”
The word abused slapped me in the face. “I didn’t abuse Dante!”
“He’s fifteen!”
“He doesn’t look it.”
He shook his head, his expression incredulous. “You’re unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable.”
“I’m telling you the truth. He doesn’t look his age. He’s taller than me, looks closer to twenty than fifteen.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes.”
He stormed over to the cabinet and snatched up the framed photo I took of the juvie class. He returned, the anger radiating off him causing me to back up into the door.
He shoved the photo in my face. “Which one is he?” When I didn’t answer, he yelled, “Which one?!”
I started crying, my whole body shaking.
He turned the photo around and scanned it, probably trying to guess who Dante was. His attention returned to me a few seconds later. “Black hair, beautiful, that was what Syn said,” he muttered, his words confirming my suspicions about my father’s partner.
Markus tapped Dante’s image. “It’s him, isn’t it?”
Dante stared back at me from the photo, with his finger raised in a fuck you. And I was fucked, good and proper, Markus’s knowledge stripping me bare.
I swiped a hand across my eyes and nodded.
“He doesn’t look twenty to me!” Markus threw the photo at the wall, making me cry out. The picture fell to the floor, the glass spraying over the carpet.
“You’re telling the principal,” he spat.
I started shaking my head, a new line of fear racing through me. “No, no, I can’t, I’ll go to jail.”
“You’re telling the principal!”
“I-I can’t. I can’t. Don’t do this to me.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Don’t do this to you? You’re the one letting this kid take the fall.”
“He doesn’t want me to do anything.”
“’Cause he probably loves you, like I stupidly do... No. Did. ’Cause it wasn’t you I loved, it was an image you hid behind. The sweet loving wife, so nice and pretty, not this fucking child abuser I see now.”
“I’m not a child abuser,” I snapped, my hands shaking like crazy. “Dante chased me, not the other way around.”
“Like Joelene chased me. Yet I didn’t give into her, and you want to know why? ’Cause she’s a child! And I’m married!” He shoved a hand through his blond hair, giving it a tug, making it stand on end. “I went through hell ’cause of that girl, absolute hell, while you were fucking a male version of her, not giving a damn what I was going through.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Your sorries ain’t fucking good enough! They won’t stop this kid from being taken away, or change the fact you abused him.”
“Stop saying that! It wasn’t abuse!”
“Then what is it? ’Cause from where I’m standing, I see a pathetic woman willing to let a child take a fall they don’t deserve, all ’cause you’re too much of a coward to admit to what you did. They’re going to put this kid in juvie, then foster care.”
“I won’t let that happen. I’ll fix it.”
“You can’t fix what you did. The only thing you can do is go to the principal and admit this kid didn’t assault you.”
“I told Principal Sao that.”
“Liar, otherwise Mr. Rakete wouldn’t be scrambling to stop Child Welfare from taking his nephew away.”
“I’m telling you, he’s not going to be taken away.”
“’Cause he’s run away instead. His uncle said he’s gone missing. Where is he?”
“He hasn’t run away, I dropped him off at their compound.”
“Which means Child Welfare will eventually get him.” He snatched his mobile phone off the side cabinet. “Call the principal,” he said, thrusting it out at me.
“School’s finished.”
“You can leave
a message.”
I shook my head.
“Do it!”
“I can’t!”
“Then I will.” He spun around and headed for the shelving where he’d gotten the photo from. He grabbed the phone book and dumped it on the coffee table, flicking through it.
I rushed over and snatched the book away from him.
He straightened, hitting me with a venomous glare. “Coward.”
“I’ll go to jail!”
“Where you belong!”
I shook my head. “You can’t do this to me, you can’t. It’ll ruin me.”
“Like you’re ruining this boy’s life?”
“I’m not ruining it. You don’t understand his life, what’s happened to him. What I did is the least of his worries.”
“He’s going to be ripped away from his family!”
“I said I won’t allow that to happen!”
“How?”
“I’ll talk to the principal.” I snatched the phone out of his hand. “I’ll make him understand that Dante didn’t attack me. That he’s overreacting.”
“He’s not overreacting, ’cause you lied to him about the attack.”
“I didn’t! A girl saw Dante kiss me and got the wrong idea. She thought he forced himself onto me.”
He sneered at me. “But it was mutual.”
“Yes!” I yelled, shaking. “Because I love him.”
He took a step back, banging into the couch, his expression disbelieving. “You can’t be fucking serious?”
“I am. I love Dante and was going to ask for a divorce.”
“You can have it! I don’t want to be with you. You disgust me! And you can’t love this kid, otherwise you’d defend him instead of hiding behind your fear with lies.”
“I do love him.”
“Until the next pretty boy comes along. You’re just like your old man.” He grimaced at me. “You’re such a fucking hypocrite cutting your father off for all those years, when you’re doing the exact same thing. No. You’re doing worse, ’cause at least Syn is legal.”
Unable to handle it anymore, I spun around, just needing to escape.
“Yeah, run, let your lover take the fall. Let him go to juvie, at least he’ll be safe from you.”
I stopped in my tracks and turned to face him. “I’m not letting him take the fall!” I yelled, although I knew I was. Markus was right. I was allowing Principal Sao to believe what Lindy wanted him to, because it was better for me if he did.
Markus sniffed. “You really believe that?”
I didn’t reply.
“I thought so,” he said. “You’re not stupid, Clara, you know what will happen to this kid if you don’t confess.”
“What do you care?” I snapped. “He chased me. Wanted to have sex with me, all the while knowing I was married.”
“Of course he did, he’s a fifteen-year-old boy. What boy wouldn’t want to have sex with you. You’re gorgeous. Though, all I see now is ugliness. You fucking repulse me.”
I didn’t reply.
He continued, “You deserve to go to jail for this. It’s where you belong.”
“Are you going to tell the police?”
He shook his head. “No. But I’ll back this boy’s uncle if he decides to press charges against you, especially now I know everything he said is true.”
I looked down at his phone, then back at him, my hand trembling uncontrollably.
“So, what are you going to do?” he asked.
My eyes dropped to the phone again. I took a deep breath and pressed Principal Sao’s number, forcing my hand to stay still as I raised it to my ear. Isaac’s recorded voice came over the line, asking to leave a message.
I willed myself not to back down, telling myself that Marcus was right, that Dante would suffer if I didn’t confess. When the beep sounded, I started talking, “This is Clara. Dante didn’t assault me, the kiss was mutual. You can’t let CYFS take him away from his father. You can’t expel him either. This is all my fault. I allowed it to happen.” I hung up and dropped the phone like it was burning hot.
Without a word, Markus bent down and picked up his phone, then walked past me, snatching his keys and wallet off the cabinet by the front door.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“As far away from you as possible.” He disappeared out of the front door.
I followed him outside, seeing my father steer his BMW into his driveway.
Markus stopped by his Ford and looked over the lavender hedge at my father as he got out of his car. “Your daughter had sex with a fifteen-year-old!” Markus said loudly.
My father’s eyes widened, his shocked gaze moving to me. I stared back at him as Markus jumped into his car, unable to look away from my father’s horrified expression.
29
Dante
“You bastard!” I yelled, lashing out at Hemi, furious he’d told Clara’s husband about me. “She did nuthin’ to me, nuthin’!”
Hemi grabbed my arms again. “She did! She’s a fuckin’ paedo.”
“No, your sister is, not Clara!”
He tensed. “What the fuck did you say?”
I sneered at him, knowing my words would hurt more than my fists. “I lied when I said Ngaire wuzn’t creeping on me.”
His hands whipped away from me, his expression almost scared, as though I was diseased. Which I was. Ngaire’s touch had sickened my mind, making it eat into itself, trying to find ways to fight the memory of her touch, of being inside of her, of her body covering mine. I started to shake, the overwhelming sense of helplessness and revulsion I’d felt returning full force. I dropped my gaze, staring at the floor instead of his horrified eyes.
“Why didn’t you tell me when I saw her in the men’s bathroom?” Hemi said. “I did ask you.”
I looked back up, surprised he believed me, especially after Jasper’s reaction. I’d told Jasper his auntie was creeping on me, yet he’d kicked me, treating me like I was a lying bastard.
“Please answer me,” Hemi said, his voice soft, not accusing like Jasper’s had been.
“I couldn’t,” I croaked out, realising I’d fucked up majorly, the consequences of my words finally dawning on me. I’d spoken in anger, not even considering what it would mean for my cousin. Because Ngaire would tell Hemi what she’d been blackmailing me with in retaliation for me ratting her out.
“Why?” he asked. “I would’ve made her stop perving on you.”
“She wuz blackmailing me.”
His brows pulled together. “With what?”
I shook my head, not willing to tell him, because he’d tell my dad.
He placed a hand on my arm. “Don’t be scared, son,” he said, the word son making me think of what Kapo had mentioned—that Hemi saw me as one. I’d been a complete shithead to him, yet he was speaking to me like this, treating me in a way I didn’t deserve, believing me over his own sister.
I looked up at the ceiling and blinked rapidly, my eyes welling up with tears. I’d been so angry with him over what he’d done to Clara, but now, I wanted to hug him like I hugged my dad.
Hemi gave my arm a gentle squeeze. “Please, Dante, tell me.”
I forced back my tears, because I needed to be calm, needed to protect my cousin. “You can’t tell my dad,” I said, lowering my eyes to his.
“Are you scared of what he’d do to Ngaire?”
I shook my head, panic starting to well up again. “No. What he’ll do to Hunter.”
Hemi’s expression turned confused. “What’s your cousin gotta do with this?”
“Ngaire said she’d tell my dad I whored myself out and sold drugs if I didn’t do as she said. I don’t care ’bout the ho shit anymore, everyone thinks I’m one anyway, but if she tells my dad I sell drugs, he’ll know it’ll be Hunter who supplies me. He’ll go after him. But it’s not Hunter’s fault. I begged him for the drugs. The power wuz gonna be cut off and we barely had enough money to cover food and rent. I didn’t have a
choice. But Dad wouldn’t understand that. He’ll go nuts if he finds out. Please, I’m begging you, don’t tell him.”
“Did Ngaire do more than perv on you?” he asked.
Bile rose at the back of my throat, both fear and disgust fighting with each other for dominance. “Yes.”
“What did she do?” he croaked out, looking like he already knew the answer, or at least suspected it.
“She...” I stopped talking and wrapped my arms around myself, not wanting to say it, because if I did, it would make me a victim like my brother. I didn’t want people to look at me like that.
Hemi’s chest started to rise and fall fast. I’d never seen fear in his eyes before, the man one of the toughest people I knew, but right now, he looked utterly terrified. “Just tell me,” he said. “Please, just tell me.”
“She blackmailed me into—” I took a big breath in, then said it, “—fucking her.”
His face fell.
I pushed on, afraid he’d change his mind and blame me for doing his sister, since I had to get hard to fuck her. “I didn’t wanna do her. I had to close my eyes and think ’bout my teacher, or I wouldn’t have gotten hard. You gotta believe me. Ngaire grosses me out. I puked afterwards—”
He cut my babbling off. “When did this happen?”
I screwed up my face, knowing he was going to turn on me. I could see disgust twisting his mouth, darkness brewing behind his eyes. Because, although my words were true, they still sounded like pathetic excuses.
“When?!” he yelled.
I jolted and instantly dropped my gaze, feeling nothing but shame.
“I’m sorry,” he said, taking hold of my shoulders. “I didn’t meana yell at you.” He continued babbling, saying I could tell him anything, that I had nothing to be ashamed of, that this wasn’t my fault, that it was all Ngaire’s.
So relieved I’d misread him, I looked back up. “A coupla days before the fight at the auditions,” I replied, answering his question about when I’d fucked Ngaire.
He stopped babbling, his expression surprised. “That wuz a while ago. Even if you didn’t think you could come to me, why didn’t you at least tell Jasper? He could’ve helped you.”
Shattered Poetry (Broken Lives #2) Page 30