by Kim Cormack
She pointed at a few of her friends and slurred, “I have to tell them...”
He led her through the gyrating crowd towards the door as he whispered in her ear, “I say we just sneak out.”
Kayn couldn’t even think. He was helping her walk by this point. A wave of nausea washed over her and she mumbled, “I think I’m going to be sick.” He changed directions and deposited her back at the same bar stool he’d taken her from, saying he’d be right back. Her vision wavered again. She felt unusually sedated. She could barely keep her eyes open. The bartender took one look at her and slid her a glass of water. Kayn tried to say thank you and she wasn’t sure what came out but it definitely wasn’t that. She took a sip of the water and it felt like it was going to come right back up. The cute guy came back and sat next to her. He told her she could use some fresh air. That sounded great. Kayn tried to get up and go with him but she couldn’t walk. She told him he’d have to carry her as she laid her head down on the bar and closed her eyes so the room would stop spinning. In an instant the lights went out.
She heard Frost’s voice and tried to open her eyes, “Oh honey. You’re going to regret this. Where’s Zach?” she noted that he sounded choked, but couldn’t open her eyes. It felt like someone was carrying her. Yes, she was moving. She tried to open her eyes and the room started spinning again. It wouldn’t stop and she started to gag. She threw up and heard, “Shit Kayn.” It was Zach’s voice. She blacked out again and came too poised over the toilet bowl, staring into the vomit filled porcelain god before her. How did she get here? She heard voices in the next room as she began tossing her cookies in a ridiculous way. Someone was holding her hair and rubbing her back while she vomited. She blacked out again and woke up to the sun streaming through the sheer curtains in the room. No, no… it hurts. Everything hurts. She buried her face in her pillow and groaned dramatically.
She heard Zach’s voice, “I’m so sorry.”
She lifted her face off the pillow and groaned, “Sorry about what?”
Zach questioned, “What’s the last thing you remember?”
She tried to think and couldn’t dredge up a single thought. “I can’t think. Please, don’t ask me to try.” Her head was pounding. “How drunk was I last night?”
Zach’s expression changed. He said, “You were pretty drunk but we suspect it was probably more than that. Frost thinks that guy you were hanging out with drugged your drink. I’m sorry, you looked like you were having a good time and I didn’t want to bud in.”
Her mouth felt like she’d eaten a whole container of minty vomit flavored paste. She didn’t remember dancing with anyone. Kayn mumbled, “I don’t remember any guy?”
“I’ll do better,” Zach assured as he held out a hand to help her up. “I promise.”
Kayn didn’t want to remove her hands from the either side of her pulsating head to get up. She said, “It’s not your fault. If I wasn’t that drunk maybe I would have noticed somebody drugging my drink. Where’s everyone else?”
Zach smiled as he replied, “Waiting for us in the restaurant.”
There was no way in hell she could eat.
Zach leaned closer and whispered, “Want me to go get you some runny eggs and toast?”
Oh crap, she leapt from the bed and sprinted on her legs of jelly into the washroom, barely making it to the toilet before she began to dry heave. It seriously felt like she was dying and she’d actually died on many occasions.
Zach was standing in the doorway behind her chuckling to himself. She heard the tap running and he suggested, “You should drink some water. It probably won’t stay down but it will make your throat feel better.”
She took the glass of water from him and drank it. It stayed down. Kayn stayed there for a while hugging the toilet, groaning. When her stomach felt like it had settled down, she got up and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She expected to see her black mascara streaming down a blotchy swollen face. Her face was blotchy and swollen but clean. She rewashed her face and brushed her teeth, then gargled with some mouthwash.
Zach explained, “You had a bath last night. We even washed your hair.”
Kayn paused, afraid to ask. “Who gave me a bath? What do you mean by… we?”
Zach was silent for a second before answering, “Well, I helped hold you up while Grey gave you a bath. Frost and Lexy were here too but they waited out there.”
This was so humiliating. “Why were two boys giving me a bath while I was unconscious?”
Zach cleared his throat nervously as he explained, “Frost had to have a shower first. You threw up all over him and when he got out. You were out cold but I couldn’t put you to bed like that. Nobody would’ve been able to sleep in here. You smelled rancid. Grey showed me how to bathe someone unconscious. I guess he’s done it for Lexy a few times. With your dead weight, it was quite difficult and a two-person job. You were absolutely covered in vomit. It was pretty gross. The girls slept in Frost’s room because we couldn’t get rid of the scent of bile.”
Well, that probably killed that. Puking on the guy you kind of have a thing for, was about the least sexy thing you could do. She turned around and stared at her reflection. Welcome to the all humiliation Kayn channel. I’ll be your host. Today I’m going to get roofied and puke all over the hottest guy I’ve ever seen and then just for shits and giggles, I’m going to vomit all over myself. Then, I’m going to smell so rancid that everybody has to leave the room while I’m bathed by two boys.
Zach was still standing behind her in the doorway. He came closer, gave her shoulder a squeeze and apologized, “I’m sorry. I should have been paying attention. I’m really not very good at this Handler thing.”
Kayn smiled at him in the mirror and replied, “I’m an adult. This is my fault, not yours.”
He smiled back at her and teased, “Next time I get drunk you can take care of me and give me a bath.”
Kayn started to laugh as she gave her response, “Of course.” She winked at him.
He placed his arm over her shoulder and whispered, “If you were a mortal, you would have been in the hospital getting your stomach pumped last night.” He kissed the side of her head and teased, “Come on rock star. It’s time to face the firing squad.”
They grabbed their backpacks, strolled down to the lobby to return the key and made their way to the restaurant. All eyes were on her the second she walked in the door but they carried on eating and nobody said a word about it. She ordered some toast and tea, while saying a silent prayer with every mouthful that it wouldn’t come back up. She kept inconspicuously glancing at Frost and was secretly relieved when he didn’t look at her once. Everyone appeared to be in agreement that there was no need to discuss what happened the night before. Once the group had finished eating, they left the table and made their way to the RV that was temporarily taking up multiple parking spots.
Markus called her over and whispered, “Don’t worry about it. Sometimes you have to learn things the hard way.”
“I’ll definitely never do that again,” Kayn mumbled.
Markus messed-up her hair as he teased, “Good, I’m holding you to that. This is your free one. Go find an empty bunk and sleep it off.”
She sheepishly made her way past the group already sitting at the table grinning at her. Kayn stowed her bag, climbed up onto a bunk, pulled the covers over her head and closed her eyes. She drifted off to sleep and in her dreams, she went somewhere that she hadn’t gone in quite a while.
Dangerous Things
She was standing in front of the enormous picture window at Kevin’s family’s lake side cabin, staring at the glass like surface of the lake. A long trail of shimmering light created by dawn’s first rays made the surface of the water appear to glitter as though someone had dropped a trail of floating sparkling diamonds. A fish jumped and she wondered if the fishing rods were still in the closet. Kayn wandered over and stared at the rustic cabin’s closet door. She opened it and the rods were still ther
e. Just before she closed the door she noticed the grooves on the inside of the closet. It was a growth chart for Kevin and Clay carved into the wood. She reached out and traced one of the grooves that read, Kevin, seven years old. Kayn smiled as she remembered him at seven. He’d been a goofy kid with messy dark hair and innocent eyes. Then she spotted her own name with the number seven. Kayn ran her fingertip over it and got a sliver. She put her finger in her mouth and easily nibbled the shard of wood out of the tender flesh of the pad. Kayn took one of the rods out of the closet. Had Kevin ever come back to this cabin in his dreams? A part of her hoped he had. Only through remembering his past would he recall the real reason he left with Triad. She understood why he did it. He had to save his mother and brother. He’d destroyed their relationship for a noble cause. That wouldn’t prove to be worth anything at all if he never recalled the reason and followed through with saving the surviving members of his family. She wanted him to remember the sensation of his mother’s healing kiss on a wounded knee. She wanted him to dream about sitting on the edge of that dock with his brother, with their feet dangling in the still water, while they waited for a tug on their fishing lines. A memory of them as children running barefoot down that dock and leaping into the water filled her heart with the adoration she’d felt for him back then. Shit, she couldn’t think about these things anymore. He was gone. A knock on the door startled her and her heart tightened. No, she didn’t want to see his face. The sight of his face had confused her into seeing what she wanted to see not who he really was. The door wasn’t locked and door knob began to turn. Kayn began to back away from the door. It started to open. She grabbed the rod and raised it in the air. She was ready to fight. She heard Zach’s voice echoing in the distance, “Wake up. You’re dreaming. Wake up Kayn.” Kayn opened her eyes to the sound of humming tires. She was on her bunk.
Zach scooted in beside her and began stroking her hair as he whispered, “That was quite the nightmare. Which nightmarish version of death from the Testing were you dreaming about?”
Kayn didn’t answer, all she could think about was the panic she’d felt at the slightest possibility of seeing Kevin again. They were supposed to be enemies during the Testing. It hadn’t started out that way but by the time the Testing was over, they were.
He whispered, “You don’t have to tell me. I’d imagine we’re all going to be haunted by nightmares of that place.”
She was supposed to be a Dragon, damn it!
Zach kissed her forehead and reassured, “Hey, it’s alright. You’re here with me. Your heart is pounding a million miles an hour Brighton.”
She found herself wishing they’d use something else as her nickname. Her mortal last name made her think of the other Brighton’s that hadn’t survived. Her brother Matt, her mother and father. Chloe was now as alive as she was. They were one. There was no line between them anymore. She curled up against Zach and closed her eyes. She couldn’t allow herself to be vulnerable. Dragons never cry.
She felt the warmth of his breath as he kissed her hair and whispered, “Let it out. It’s okay, I won’t tell anybody.”
Kayn allowed a few shuddering breaths to escape. This was humiliating. Some Dragon she was turning out to be. Her first acts after the Testing had been to allow herself to be a virgin sacrifice, then she allowed a drunk King to beat the crap out of her because her clan told her she wasn’t allowed to fight back. Oh, the insanity had not stopped there. She’d taken energy from Frost. Almost made out with him in a bathroom and then she proceeded to get so drunk that she didn’t notice someone had roofied her. She barfed all over the guy she had unresolved feelings for and was given a bath by two boys. Under train wreck in the dictionary there was probably a smiling picture of her. She felt Zach shift around, so he could lie down next to her and hold her. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift off to sleep again, feeling safe in his arms. She’d worry about the mess she’d made tomorrow.
When she awoke, she felt no movement. The motorhome was parked somewhere. She swung her legs over the side of the bunk and slid off, landing with the agility of someone that had not been completely wasted the night before. She was still embarrassed by her behavior but there was absolutely no point remaining upset over something that couldn’t be changed. Kayn grabbed her back pack along with her toiletries and padded down the hall towards the bathroom. The RV appeared to be empty. Where were they? She dug her toothbrush out of the bag along with her toothpaste. She brushed her teeth, washed her face and put on some fresh clothes. Feeling more like her old self she sauntered back down the short hall tossing her backpack on the bunk as she passed. Kayn could hear the others outside and when she opened the door, she was surprised to discover that she’d lost an entire day. It was already dark outside. She walked down the couple of steps to stand in the gravel. They’d already set up camp.
Lily’s voice ominously announced, “It lives.”
Kayn shook her head knowing this was only the start of her penance for her night of overindulgence.
Grey, Zach and Lexy were sitting around a fire pit roasting hotdogs over the flames. She was starting to feel hungry. They smelled amazing.
Grey sweetly offered, “If you’d like a beer there’s a six pack in the fridge.” Her eyes widened and she shook her head slowly from side to side. He chuckled, “Didn’t think so.”
She looked around for something to cook her wiener with and Lily motioned towards the bushes. “Frost is out there trying to find one for himself.”
Seven of them were missing. “Where did everybody go?”
Grey chimed in, “They’re on a job.”
Kayn nodded, knowing what that meant. Already? That was crazy. She took the hint and ventured off into the overgrown brush herself in search of a stick to roast a wiener with. The trees weren’t very tall and there was no breeze at all. Where were they? She didn’t recognize this campsite. She’d definitely never been here before. Kayn wasn’t even able to hazard a guess as to where they were. There was thick long grass, odd looking trees and as she ventured into the brush she found herself soaking her shoes when the land underfoot became swamp. Where in the hell was she? She could hear toads croaking and the dense foliage was lit up by an unusually large amount of firefly’s dancing in the air above her. She stopped moving for a second to appreciate the firefly’s exquisite dance in the sky above her. They were beautiful, like stars whirling around the sky. She batted a few mosquitos off her arm and found herself so mesmerized by the hypnotizing movement of the firefly’s dance that she almost forgot the reason she’d ventured off into the bushes in the first place. She was there to find a stick but she wasn’t in a hurry. Kayn sat on a stump and took a moment to just appreciate the foreign sights and sounds. A twig snapped behind her. Kayn knew she was in no danger. Well, not physical danger. She spoke softly in almost a whisper so she wouldn’t scare the fireflies away, “Did you find a stick?”
Frost answered with his normal tone, “Why are you whispering?” The fireflies scattered.
Her heart sank. She pointed towards the sky and said, “That’s why.”
Frost strolled around her and sat down on a stump facing her. “Was that the first time you’ve seen that many fireflies at once?”
She nodded and quietly sighed. They’d been beautiful but they were gone and she was disappointed. It was then that she noticed Frost was holding three sticks in his hand. He passed one to her as a silent apology for wrecking her blissful moment. She took it from him and noticed that he’d even sharpened the end. Kayn touched the point with the tip of her finger and said, “Thank you.”
Frost grinned, stood up and held out his hand. She took it, grateful he wasn’t going to make a big deal out of the fact that she’d vomited all over him the night before.
He kept holding it as he proclaimed, “Allow me to help you find your way out of this swamp in the dark.”
A swamp? That made sense. Kayn laughed, “My socks are already soaking wet.”
He shook his head
as he pulled her towards him and teased, “You knew I was out here. If you’d called me, you could have avoided those uncomfortable wet socks.”
He was acting completely normal. She wasn’t sure how to take it. Was this a trick? She whispered, “Zach told me I threw up on you last night. I was embarrassed.” Frost tucked her hair that escaped from her ponytail behind her ear and her heart flip flopped beneath the thin material of her tank top.
He whispered, “Don’t worry about it. It’s much faster if you learn the simple life lessons the hard way. We’ve all been there. Granted, most of us were much younger than you but it happens to everyone at least once.”
She heard the buzzing song of the fireflies and stared up at the dancing lights above them. Minus the talk of vomit this was a memorable moment. Kayn smiled as she stared at the lights dancing across the sky and whispered, “They’re so beautiful.” He was beaming at her when she met his eyes.
Frost cupped her chin gently and said, “I’m glad you found your way back.”
It took her a second to realize what he meant by that. When it sunk in, she felt it in her soul. What Grey had taught her about looking for the beauty in small moments in the years prior to the Testing had brought her back. Kayn was fully able to embrace the splendor of the repetitious croaking, chirping symphony of swamp creatures. Their musical masterpiece, made even more wondrous by the lights that flickered above her in the sky as she strolled through the brush hand in hand with him. Once they could see the flickering of the campfire through the foliage, he let go of her hand. She understood why. Once again, he was in the position of being her emotional crutch. If he was still holding her hand in front of the others they’d probably give him shit for it. She’d been holding his hand for a good five minutes without the slightest urge to take any energy from him. Had that moment of beauty tamed the Dragon within her? He started to make his way through the bushes and stopped when he realized she wasn’t following him.