by J D Abbas
Shattered by Shadows
The Innocence Cycle
Book 1
by
J D Abbas
© 2015 by J D Abbas
Editing by P.N. Hopkins
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Tamak Books.
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A Pacific Northwest Company
For more information about the artist who created the cover design, see her Facebook page:
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Dedicated to
the enslaved innocents around the world
who continue to be shattered
by the greed and appetites of the ruthless.
May you one day find freedom
and love.
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
Names & Pronunciation Guide
Foreign Words
Trigger Warning
Literary Warning
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Acknowledgements
About Me
Names & Pronunciation Guide
Alsimion – Al-SIM-ee-on – magical forest in the central Shalamhar Valley, offshoot of the ancient forest of Yabwana
Anakh – AH-nukh – female survivor of an ancient race that has turned evil
Athebria – Uh-THEH-bree-uh – in prophecy, a leader who would stand against evil
Bardulah – Bar-DO-luh - realm to the east of the Shalamhar
Borok – BORE-ahk – the trade tongue of the Shalamhar
Braiden – BRAY-duhn – Celdorn’s healer-in-training. Youngest of Celdorn’s group. Rogaran
Bria – BREE-uh – Celdorn’s older dog. Like a Great Dane. Black and white
Celdorn – KELL-dorn – Lord Protector of the Shalamhar. Rogaran.
Celebriana – Kuh-LEE-bree-ah-nuh. Second name given to Elena
Dahmid – DAH-mid – Silvandir’s second in command at Kelach
Dalgo – DAHL-go – Celdorn’s healer. Rogaran.
Domar – DOE-mhar – Elena’s father
Drahmil – DRAH-muhl – Guardian serving at Kelach
Drendil – DREN-duhl – Elbrion’s Ilqazar
Dussendor – DO-sen-door - Guardian stronghold in the western part of the Shalamhar
Elbrion – L-bree-uhn – the prince of the Elrodanar people. An empath, who left his people to partner and travel with Celdorn
Elena – L-EE-nuh – Giara’s new name, given by Celdorn. It means “little light.”
Elnar – L-nahr - language of the Elrodanar
Elondhur – L-ohn-dhur – the realm of fullest light, a final realm
Elrodanar – L-RAH-duh-nar – the light-infused race of empaths that live in Queyon
Farak – FAR-ahk – a race of mountain people in the western part of the Shalamhar. Cave dwellers
Garan – GAR-uhn - language of the Rogaran
Giara (Gia) – Ghee-R-uh (GHEE-uh) – Elena’s given name. It means “useful.” Wallanard
Giyon – Ghee-YOHN – a Guardian at Kelach
Greenholt – Guardian stronghold in the eastern part of the Shalamhar
Guardians – the overseers and protectors of the Shalamhar, mostly of the Rogaran race
Haldor – HALL-dur – Travels with Celdorn. Former priest. Close connection with the hidden realm
Ilqazar – ILL-kah-zar – an ancient equine species that serves with the Guardians
Kelach – KELL-ahk – southernmost Guardian stronghold
Khazamir – KAH-zuh-meer – mythical winged horse
Khradak – KRAH-dahk – language used by Anakh and her followers
Kyola – KEYE-oh-luh – Celdorn’s former love
Lanar – LAH-nar – language of the Wallanard people
Lazhur – LAH-zer – Mikaelin’s Ilqazar
Liora (liorai, pl) – Lee-OR-uh (Lee-OR-eye) – woodland spirits, part of the middle realm
Malak – MAL-ack – Celdorn’s Ilqazar
Malqor – MAL-kor – a Guardian at Kelach
Marach – MAR-ahk – Northernmost Guardian stronghold
Mikaelin – Mi-KAY-lin – Serves at Kelach
Morah – MORE-uh – derogative and misleading name for the Guardians
Nandhur – NAHN-dur – the middle realm between Elondhur and Umbradhur
Nasara – Nuh-SAR-uh – the renewal. When Yabwana was destroyed and Queyon created
Neldon – NELL-dun – sister village to Rhamal
Penumbra – Peh-NUHM-bruh – the realm south of the Shalamhar
Qabara – Kuh-BAR-uh – the earth
Qarhelon – Kar-HEY-lun – the written laws of the Shalamhar
Qho’el – KOH-el – personal name for the Source of all Light
Queyon – Key-YOHN – realm of light in the northern Shalamhar
Raka – RAH-kuh – language spoken by the Farak
Raphar – RAH-far – language of the Alraphim, from which Elnar developed
Rhamal – RAM-uhl – Elena’s home village in the Wallan Valley, southern part of the Shalamhar
Rogaran – Row-GAR-un – Race of people in the northern part of the Shalamhar
Sasha – SAH-shuh – Celdorn’s younger dog. Like a Great Dane. Bluish black
Shalamhar – SHALL-la-mhar – the realm governed by the Guardians and Council of Elders
Shatur – Sha-TOUR – Serves at Kelach. Rogaran. Develops ability to see through guises/glamours.
Silvandir – SIL-van-dur – castellon of Kelach. Rogaran. Can read Ilqazar’s thoughts.
Tobil – TOE-bull – Celdorn’s weapons’ master, a bard. Rogaran
Toreno – Tor-EE-no – Wallanard priest that serves in Rhamal
Umbradhur – UM-brah-dhur – the realm of deepest shadow, a final realm
Wallanard – WALL-uh-nard – the people living in the Wallan Valley. Giara’s people.
Wharndon – WARN-duhn – Guardian stronghold in the northeastern part of the Shalamhar Valley
Windham – WIN-duhm - Silvandir’s Ilqazar
Yabwana – Yuh-BWA-nuh – ancient land filled with light, destroyed by the first Nasara
Yolena – Yo-LEE-nuh – one of the liorai
Zhalor – ZHAH-lore – prince of the Ilqazar
Foreign Words
in Elrodanar, unless noted otherwise
Ada (adai, pl) – daddy, informal form of Adamar
Adamar, Adamari (pl) – father
Alianthar – healing ointment
Barah – ability to sense emotion and connect with the Jhadhela
Barqhel, Barqhelon (pl) – brother(s) of the light
Briella, Briellai (pl) – angels, bearers of light (brion – bear, el – light)
Briochella, Briochellai – Elrodanar women, descendants of the Briellai
Chiamad – Elrodanar brewers
Diagmatz – presentation day, the naming ceremony for a child
Doqajh, Doqajhi (pl) – little temple, a smaller, simplified version of the Qajh in Queyon
Gille d’Zhajh, Gille d’Zhajhi (pl) – pleasure girl/giver
Jhadhela – the power of the light, literal translation: straight toward the light
Nasara – renewal, referring to a time when volcanoes and floods destroyed the world, due to evil
Qabara – the planet, the earth they live on
Qadhar – the council of elders in Queyon
Qajh Dhorhelon – the original temple of Augmented Light in Queyon, appeared after Nasara
Qarhelon – the law of light
Qho’el – personal name of the Source of all Light - Jha Qhon - the source; Elon- of light, their deity
Rahim (m), Rahima (f) (Raphar) – shifters, first race of Guardians
Rakshad (Khradak) – stay
Rhulmhon, Rhulmha – like godparents
Sheya – precious
Sheyshon – precious one
Silothani – peace
Tamag - elixir made by Chiamad in Queyon
Yabeha – dear one
Yadar – father (for a priest)
Yaena – little one
Zhadhar (Raphar) – life force
Zhekhum – the power of darkness, literal translation: twisted or bent
Literary Warning
If long novels, prologues, and multiple points of view cause you stress, you may want a self-care plan in place before proceeding. Please do not harm your electronic reading devices. I am well aware of the controversies surrounding these literary choices. I’ve been in critique groups and Milford-style writers’ conferences for years, and my work has been the catalyst for heated debate. This series has been thirteen years in the making and been through dozens of drafts. In the end, the characters would have it no other way. And, yes, I am blaming my characters. I’ve tried to change their points of view. I’ve tried eliminating characters. I’ve lopped off sections of the story only to have them grow back. So love it or hate it, it is what it is. My ardent hope is that you will come to love the characters and their stories as much as I have and even see the wisdom in their choices.
Trigger Warning
On a more serious note, this novel series deals with what is now referred to as human trafficking, specifically child sex trafficking. There were no such labels or designations until somewhere around the year 2000, so you will not find those words in this series. But the construct is there. And it’s ugly. I exerted great effort to ensure there is no gratuitous violence or sex, but I did not shy away from truth. Well, I did at first, but my characters would not let me get away with it. This is their story, and it had to be told their way.
So, I warn you, if you are a survivor of abuse—physical, sexual, verbal or emotional—this novel may trigger PTSD or rouse buried memories and emotions. If you choose to continue reading, please have a self-care plan in place—a soothing activity, a friend you can invite to sit with you, or a therapist you can call.
While The Innocence Cycle, like life, is dark in some ways, it is also filled with light and love. It is my hope that the story will ultimately be empowering and healing for survivors and anyone else who may read it. Please know that every word was written with that intent.
*Please read trigger warning before continuing.
Prologue
An evil lurked in the heart of the great Forest of Alsimion, gem of the Shalamhar, scion of Yabwana, an evil that devoured innocence, an evil that could not be allowed to leave—or live.
The trees shivered. Musical leaves clacked discordant notes as white-barked giants bowed their heads to watch the mysterious pale creature, curled in pain, scarcely breathing.
Hours before, this same creature, then dark and fierce, snarled and fought with skill and prowess. Surrounded by a pack of ten ravenous beasts, the swarthy creature eventually yielded, overpowered and subdued.
The silent wail of her defeat sent a shockwave through the wood—a force so potent new-formed leaves tumbled from branches, tears for the fallen.
Humans all. Humans devouring human. Not since the Nasara had the wood witnessed such atrocities.
Rumors spread among the trees. Rumors of a darkness returning from the south. A darkness that consumed. Beckoning a second Nasara. Calling for the advent of Athebria.
Chapter 1
It was time for an Awakening in the Shalamhar—or so the specters had said.
Their words taunted Giara as her mind tumbled, fighting to find its way back into her body. A familiar wave of vertigo washed over her, and she rolled to her side in case she got sick. Her eyes slid open, searching for clues as to how long she’d been gone this time. It was near morning, so at least half a day. Maybe more. Lost time was difficult to measure.
In the silence of the predawn forest, she stretched her stiff limbs against the cold, unyielding ground, inch by inch, terrified of waking her captors. Everything ached from the top of her chilled head to her bare feet that found no warmth beneath the sparse wool blanket, which reeked of Farak sweat. Throbbing pain and the salty, metallic taste in her mouth confirmed the events of a night she couldn’t recall, nor did she want to.
Instead, she focused on the reverberating words of the woodland spirits, whispers of a second Nasara, the overturning of evil. They’d told her this as if it were good news, an exciting promise, but the first renewal had destroyed half of Qabara. The thought made her stomach squeeze into a fist.
Giara scanned the perimeter of the glade, looking for a sign, something, anything. Days had passed since the apparitions whispered their cryptic message, and yet nothing had changed—except for the unfurling of more spring leaves and the emergence of new baby birds. It shouldn’t have surprised her; she knew better than to believe in empty promises. The seventeen years of her wretched life had taught her well. Hope was not only futile, it was deadly.
And yet...some part of her kept getting swept up in the magic of the great Forest of Alsimion, in the music of the trees, the odd dancing lights, and the mist-like specters who greeted her each morning with a dance, almost as if they were trying to distract her, help her endure. The apparitions had been kind to her, and it made her chest ache with a longing she didn’t understand.
It’s a trap. They want something from you.
Giara started to argue with the cynical voice that hounded her, but her left calf cramped, pulling her attention away. When she extended the leg, flexing her foot, her hip scraped against something lumpy and hard. She wiggled her forearm toward it, but with wrists bound behind her, the movement was limited, awkward. As she uncovered the object, her eyes went wide, and she sucked in a silent breath. It was a knife. A Farak knife.
This is our way out. Kill them.
A shiver ran through her, and the ground rippled
throughout the clearing as if it shared her fear. Her eyes widened, and she shot a glance over her shoulder at her captors. They hadn’t moved.
She can’t kill eight of them.
They’re asleep, and drunk. Slit their throats. Quick and quiet.
Giara wished she could cover her ears, though it never helped. When the voices in her head argued like this, she felt as if she tottered on the edge of madness.
No, cut the bonds and run.
We can’t run. We’re leagues from any village, and Anakh has people everywhere. She’ll catch us, and we’ll wish we’d never been born.
I wish that now. There’s only one way out. I don’t want anyone else’s blood on my hands.
But is she strong enough to do it?
Giara didn’t know where the voices came from, why they were always in her head, but sometimes they guided her well. The despondent one was right; there was only one end to this. She wouldn’t kill; it was useless to run. But she wasn’t sure she had the courage to slit her own throat.
Giara’s gaze swept through the trees. She hated to desecrate this sacred forest with more blood, but it had been six days. The Farak would return her on the seventh. If she didn’t seize this opportunity, there might not be another.
Bile rose in her throat as she turned her back to the blade. With her hands behind her, she’d have to do this blind. Keeping her eyes on the nearest Farak, her stiff fingers felt for the hilt then turned the long, curved knife upward toward the leather thong binding her wrists. In tiny motions, she sawed at the strap, trying not to crackle the leaves beneath her.
Just as the first coil of the thong gave way, shafts of sunlight penetrated the forest canopy. The morning specters would be coming soon. Giara hesitated as the ache of loneliness overwhelmed her. She searched the clearing again, yearning to see them one last time, to feel their gentle touch, to be embraced by kindness and peace as her life’s blood drained away.