There were no farm houses at this intersection, only fields stretching off in each direction. Sharon began to shake as she realized if she went the wrong way, she might end up walking all night.
Car lights again appeared out of nowhere, washing her in light and nearly blinding her. She jumped back from the intersection and into the safety of the field. The car slowed enough that she could make out the music drumming from the radio, and then it sped off.
What if they had stopped? What if they had tried to force her into the car? What was she doing out walking this road alone?
Her hands shaking so badly she resembled her grossmammi, Sharon huddled over her purse, unzipped it, and pulled out her cell phone. Turning it on, she waited for the signal that would tell her if she had service.
As she waited, she prayed. Finally, the screen displayed the words, “Entering service area.”
She pushed the number 3 and held it.
Number 1 was for voice messages, and she didn’t have any.
Number 2 was the preset number for James.
Number 3 was for Joana.
As her best friend’s phone rang, she remembered speaking with her mother as they had hung laundry on the line. Her mother had talked about falling, about how it hurt, and about how she wanted what was best for her.
Staring into the darkness, waiting for Joana to pick up, Sharon didn’t have any answers to all the questions bouncing around in her mind, but she did know that this was not the best her mother had in mind.
Chapter 14
Tuesday dawned sunny and crisp. Julia glanced out her upstairs window. The sky sparkled blue, trees blazed with color, and Pebble Creek glittered in the distance. It was the perfect fall day for a wedding.
Her wedding.
Was this actually happening to her? Was she ready for all the changes that would take place? Sitting back on her bed, she glanced around her room. Soon it would be their room. Soon everything that was hers would be theirs.
She ran her hand over the quilt—a double wedding ring pattern. Ada had pieced it long ago, well before her hands became misshapen by the arthritis. Julia could remember coming in from helping her father in the barn and seeing her mother sitting in the front room, quilting the layers together.
It had gone in the blanket chest at the foot of her bed, buried there with her hopes and dreams. This week they had pulled it out and aired it on the line, and last night they had placed it on the bed.
Had Ada known, years ago, that one day this moment would come? Had she actually believed God had a plan for Julia’s life and that it included an October wedding to a man she barely knew?
Julia blinked back tears which threatened to fall and reached for her Bible. This was a joyous day, not one she should begin by weeping.
It was no surprise that when she opened the old, worn book that had been hers since she was a child, it opened straight to the Psalms. Of course it would. Ada had been reading to her from that book’s one hundred and fifty chapters since she could remember. Julia often found herself searching other parts of the Old Testament for answers and relying on passages from the New Testament when she needed to feel closer to her Savior. When she needed comfort, though, when she felt joyous, or even when she was afraid—she turned to the Psalms.
She turned to them now.
Her gaze landed upon the fifth verse of the thirty-seventh chapter. “Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.”
She could do that.
She might not know how to be a good wife, but she knew how to pray and turn things over to the Lord. She’d been doing that all of her life. How was a marriage any different?
Trusting in Him was the one thing that made sense. Marrying a man she barely knew didn’t. Even if he did seem kind and compassionate and—she allowed her mind to caress the word—loving. Trusting Caleb she could learn to do, but trusting God? She had been doing that all of her life.
She’d done it as her parents aged. She had done it while she stood beside her father’s grave. And she could do it this morning, as she took Caleb’s hand.
A confident peace filled her heart as she finished her prayer, shut her Bible, and rose from the bed. Straightening the quilt, she realized—not for the first time—how interconnected the rings were.
So their lives would be—from this day forth.
Thirty minutes later, after a quick breakfast with her mamm, she went to the barn to feed Missy and found Seth King there. A grin spread across his youthful face. He seemed amused that she was surprised to see him.
“Can’t have you tending to a mare on your wedding day. No worries here, Julia. I’ll take care of anyone arriving and see that Missy is comfortable too.”
“Danki. I didn’t even know you were here.”
“Caleb sent me. He asked me two days ago if I would come and tend to things. I don’t think he’s leaving anything to chance today. He wants to make sure you make it downstairs and to your wedding with no mishaps.” Seth tilted his head toward Pebble Creek. “We need to make a bridge. If we did, he could walk over here.”
“Gut idea. Maybe not today though.” Julia hurried back toward the house to change into her new dress.
It was Plain, but it was beautiful nonetheless. She hadn’t bothered with new dresses in quite some time, and the bright blue wedding material practically sparkled as she slipped it on. She tried to imagine wearing it to special occasions—others’ weddings, Christmas services, maybe even when they went into town for a dinner like the day they purchased their marriage license.
She knew whenever she wore it she would think of this morning, of her new life with Caleb, and of all the hopes and dreams that filled her heart—though there was a small amount of fear there as well. This moment wasn’t the time to focus on fear. She closed her eyes, remembered her morning prayer time, and tried to will away the nervousness.
There was no point in being afraid. There was no reason to listen to doubts. And it was too late to back out now anyway.
Her mother waited for her in the kitchen. When Julia reached her side, Ada reached up to touch her face.
Today was indeed a good day. Ada’s eyes were clear behind her glasses, and she was able to open her hands and place her palms against Julia’s cheeks. Her mother’s hands against her skin felt like the softest lamb’s wool.
“The blessing of the Lord be upon you, my dear.”
Julia had been on an emotional buggy race since the morning Ada had first told her about the decree, but she had never doubted her mother’s love. Tears filled her eyes as she realized, once again, that her days with her mamm on this side of heaven were numbered. Soon she would be all that was left of her family—or at least the family she knew.
As if reading her thoughts, Ada added, “By this evening we’ll be a new family—a family of three again.”
Hooking her arm through Julia’s, they moved toward the front door, where Miriam and Lydia were walking up the porch steps. Though it was not yet eight in the morning, and almost everything had been readied the day before, the two women had arrived early to help with last-minute preparations.
“Perhaps soon after this day, if Gotte sees fit, we’ll grow beyond three.”
Julia didn’t think there was much chance of that. She was thirty-seven years old. While it wasn’t unheard of for women her age to have children, it seemed she’d probably missed those years. She’d been worried enough about it to overcome her embarrassment and bring up the subject with Caleb. His response was a pause, followed by a slow smile.
She was learning that was typical.
“We’ll have children if Gotte wills it. Ya?”
“But didn’t you want—”
“I wouldn’t have children at all if I’d stayed single. The way I look at it, my chances are much higher now.”
“If you married someone else, someone younger, your chances would be higher still.”
They had been sitting down by the creek, watching the fish rise to the top
of the water, catching insects for their dinner.
“But I’m not marrying someone else.” He’d turned to look directly in her eyes. “I’m marrying you, and we’ll have children if Gotte wills it. If not, I’ll be grateful for the family He’s given me.”
She hadn’t brought it up again, but Ada’s comment reminded her of that conversation and sent her thoughts scurrying toward the evening ahead.
Now her stomach churned with worry. She had no idea what to expect as far as her wedding night, and she hadn’t brought up that subject with her mother. There were some things she was going to have to learn on her own.
They opened the door, and the quietness of the morning was shattered as Lydia and Miriam oohed and ahhed over her dress. Grace asked if it would be all right for her to draw before the wedding—though no portraits, of course. Soon other women from their church were arriving, bringing box after box of food.
Lydia and Miriam corralled her back upstairs, which they had decided would be the wedding staging area. After one look at Julia’s face, Miriam hurried to the bathroom next door and drew a cup of tap water.
“Are we sure everything’s ready?” Julia walked back and forth in front of the window in her room. “Maybe I should go downstairs and see if they need a hand.”
She felt as if she couldn’t pull in a deep breath, as if she’d been running, trying to catch Missy in the pasture—only Missy always came now when called. Besides, Seth was with Missy. Her mare was fine.
Miriam walked in, holding the glass of water. “Here, drink this. It will help calm your emotions. You might be hyperventilating.”
Lydia rubbed her back in light circles.
“Why would I do that?”
“Nerves,” Lydia declared. “Most people have them. You should see Caleb. He was certain you were going to change your mind. I had to stop him from driving over here last night.”
“Me? Why would I—”
“Why would you? Caleb mentioned to Gabe that you might wake up and realize he wasn’t good enough for you.”
“Good enough?” Julia was starting to feel dizzy from looking back and forth between Lydia and Miriam.
“Men can be insecure, same as women.” Miriam took the cup away and pulled her toward the bed, insisting she sit for a moment. “And they aren’t always gut at explaining their emotions. They’re adorable, especially when they’re nervous.”
The word “nervous” reminded Julia of her worries regarding the evening and what was to come when she and Caleb were alone. She glanced right, left, and finally down at her hands before asking the questions that had plagued her the last week.
Both women alleviated her fears, explaining what she needed to know and promising to be there for her in the future in case she needed to talk again about such personal matters.
“My mamm had the one talk with me, before Gabe and I married, and that was it. I felt as if I were consulting a textbook from school. Of course, we don’t have anything remotely approaching the subject in our Amish schools, but there are several good books in the public library in Cashton.” Miriam walked to the window.
Julia turned to Lydia. “She didn’t.”
“She might have. Teachers think they can find the answer to anything in a book.”
“Where did you learn what you needed to know for your wedding night?” Miriam turned back toward them and pinned Lydia with a stare.
“Oh, my mamm will talk about anything. We have a houseful of girls, and she believes we need to be well prepared. I’ll admit it’s a matter she refuses to speak of unless she is sure no man is within several buggy lengths of the house.”
“Excellent!” Miriam clapped her hands. “Three gut sources of information—myself, Lydia, and Ella. And the Cashton library, if you’re so inclined.”
“I would never. And I barely know Ella—”
“You’ve known her all your life,” Miriam reminded her.
“Yes, but—”
“She made your wedding cake. It’s a simple frosting design, two layers, and beautiful. You’re going to love it.”
“Did she make the fruit pies?” Julia allowed herself to be distracted by the thought of food and her guests and what was to take place over the next few hours.
“She did.” Now Lydia was standing, rubbing her stomach. “Plus cream-filled doughnuts that she had to practically hide from my bruder, Stephen. You’ll have plenty of sweets for your guests.”
Together they stood at the window, looking down at the lawn where the church pews had been arranged. It seemed everyone she and Caleb had invited—the extended list of guests—had arrived. From upstairs, the women’s dresses looked like a sea of rainbow colors, and the men were all dressed in black coats, black pants, and white shirts. They had all arrived early and worn their best. For some reason Julia was surprised. She had thought…
What had she thought? That perhaps they would find an excuse not to come. That her wedding couldn’t be an important event in their lives.
There was a light knock at the door, followed by her mother’s voice. “Bishop Atlee is ready to meet with you, dear.”
Miriam and Lydia each gave her a quick hug before pushing her gently away from the window. She pulled in a calming breath, squared her shoulders, and went to the door. Praying that her stomach would calm, she walked out of her bedroom.
Her life had certainly changed in the last month in nearly every regard. She made her way down the stairs and into the sitting room. The shades had been partially drawn for privacy. Bishop Atlee and Caleb both turned toward her as she entered the room. She tried to decipher the emotions playing across Caleb’s face, but it was impossible. She didn’t know him that well.
Was he excited? Frightened? Regretting this bold decision they had made?
The bishop suggested they all sit, and then he opened his Bible and began to counsel them. Slowly Julia’s fears calmed to a manageable flutter. It was good that together they would begin this day with Atlee’s words of guidance and silent prayer.
Julia had been to dozens of weddings in her life.
She had heard the traditional Scriptures read to the members of the church before the two were announced as one—the Scriptures Bishop Atlee would use in a few moments.
But while they had this time alone, he opened his Bible slowly to the book of Genesis. His hand, aged and work worn, moved slowly down the page until his finger stopped at the twenty-fourth chapter and he began to read. He read to them of Abraham, of a father’s love and concern for his son. How he sent a servant to do what he couldn’t. “‘Go instead to my homeland…and find a wife there for my son Isaac.’”
And then the servant trusted that the Lord would guide him. “‘O Lord, God of my master Abraham…give me success today.’”
Julia had heard the story before. She recognized it as the verses Ada suggested she read a few weeks ago. This was different, though.
She had never heard the story of Isaac and Rebekah while sitting in her wedding dress, sitting across from Caleb. She had not heard it moments before she was about to be married. As Atlee spoke, it seemed he was stitching each word into the fabric of her heart.
“‘Before he had finished praying, he saw a young woman named Rebekah…’”
Rebekah, who woke and walked to the spring not knowing that act would set off a chain of events that would lead to her marriage.
As Julia had not known that day she’d run to her garden, run seeking a place of refuge, that Caleb would be sitting across from her now, the man she was going to marry.
“‘Here is Rebekah; take her and go. Yes, let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord had directed.’”
A lump formed in Julia’s throat as she realized for the first time the role Rebekah’s and Isaac’s fathers had played in their marriage.
Atlee had stopped reading, and Julia thought perhaps they were done. She heard the singing from outside—their guests, raising their voices in celebration as she and Caleb and the bishop shared the
se special moments alone. Atlee glanced up at them, this man who so often had a smile playing across his lips, and he had such a serious expression that Julia wondered what could be wrong.
“Your marriage, it is somewhat different, ya? It is starting more like the old ways. You did not court or date or choose each other in quite the fashion our young people do today. The world has moved on, and even though we cling to the old ways as best we can, Amish communities have moved with the world in some regards.”
He patted his open Bible, and then he gently closed it and set it on the table next to the couch. “There may be days where you have your doubts because of this strange and wunderbaar beginning. When you do, remember Isaac and Rebekah.”
Reaching out to her with his left hand and to Caleb with his right, he spoke softly. “‘Isaac brought Rebekah into his mother Sarah’s tent, and she became his wife. He loved her deeply, and she was a special comfort to him after the death of his mother.’”
When he bowed his head, Julia found herself staring into Caleb’s blue eyes. The moments ticked by, and she realized they were to be praying. She tried to look away, to look down, but she couldn’t.
She didn’t know how this would all end. She couldn’t define the emotions dancing through her heart. She certainly didn’t know if she would have the kind of love Rebekah experienced.
But the expression in Caleb’s eyes gave her hope—hope for their future together.
As they moved outside to be wed, her stomach still quivered and her hands still shook. But those things no longer worried her. As Lydia had said—most people were nervous. The time with Caleb and Bishop Atlee had convinced her that the new life they were beginning would most certainly be one God would bless.
Chapter 15
Caleb tried to focus on the sermon, but his thoughts kept turning back to the moments he, Julia, and Atlee had spent in the sitting room.
The bishop’s words weren’t lost on him. Though their parents hadn’t selected him and Julia for each other, they had approved of their decision. Ada had told him so twice, both in front of Julia and privately. She explained she had been praying for years that God would send someone to care for and love her daughter. She was certain he was the answer to those prayers.
A Wedding for Julia Page 10