by Laura Ward
The creaking of the wire gate told me I was no longer alone. I looked up and saw Daisy speaking to the lifeguard at the check-in desk, and then pointing at me. With no one swimming, the guard wasn’t in his chair.
God, she was a breath of fresh air. Wearing those hip-hugging, butt-showcasing, cut-off denim shorts and another thin tank top, she looked sinful. Her blonde hair hung straight, falling in waves over her shoulder.
She walked to me with her head down, studying the ground. I noticed years ago that Daisy avoided eye contact unless directly addressed. Having Dean and Damian as brothers, it struck me as especially odd. Every member of the Goldsmith clan was confident and self-assured.
Everyone but Daisy.
“Hey, Sunshine.” I grinned as her eyes followed the path of my body, lingering on my shirtless chest. When she finally met my eyes, hers were hooded. I pulled her into a hug, her soft body wrapping around mine. God, she felt so good in my arms.
I moved away before my body reacted to her. “Sit here in the shade. I brought a cooler of water and pop.”
Daisy sat across from me, pulling out her sunglasses and slipping them on. With her eyes covered, it was much harder to read her. She was too guarded, even around me.
“Did you check your practice test yet?” Daisy asked as she cracked the tab on a diet pop.
“Yup. I marked all the ones I got wrong and was hoping you could help me analyze them and see if we can figure out why I’m such a dumbass.” I rolled my eyes, hating that tests were a struggle for me.
Daisy sipped her soda, but her eyes narrowed as I spoke the last two words. “You’re not a dumbass, Jon. I’ve read through the study guide. The LSAT’s are incredibly hard. That’s why everyone has to practice for so long. I’m just here for moral support.”
She placed her can on the table and wrapped her cool fingers around my clenched fist. My heart tripped at the contact. I unclenched my hand and laced my fingers through hers. At that gesture, Daisy pulled her bottom lip into her mouth, sinking her teeth into the soft skin. My dick swelled. I wanted to lick that lip, to soothe the teeth marks she would leave there. I wanted to taste that mouth.
If I could have smacked myself upside the head, I would have.
Friends, asshole. We were only friends.
~~~
Two hours later, my brain was fried. Daisy was a patient and encouraging coach. She only knew the answers because they were in front of her, but nevertheless, she was level-headed and calm to my over-the-top, angry man persona.
Placing my cap on the table, I dove into the deep end of the pool, the chilly water calming my racing mind. As I broke the surface, I watched Daisy wrap her hair on top of her head in a bun. She hadn’t gotten up from the table, despite the numerous dips in the pool I had taken to cool off. I knew she had to be overheated. Her cheeks were pink and her skin damp with sweat.
I swam to the side of the pool, crossing my arms over the edge and resting my chin on top. “Sunshine, why won’t you come swimming with me?”
Daisy looked off to the side, chewing on that poor, abused lip again. Finally, she shrugged.
“Daisy? I asked you a question. It’s hotter than hell out here. Why won’t you get in the water?”
She shook her head before speaking. “It’s so stupid, Jon. Please don’t make me say it.”
I stared at her, waiting. The desire I had for her to trust me was overwhelming. Friendship with a girl like I had with Daisy was foreign to me, but I cherished it. What I wasn’t certain of was whether she felt the same.
“I hate how I look in a bathing suit, all right? Belinda and Marnie were the worst when we were at the pool. Even my brothers and sisters give me a hard time. So I avoid it, that’s all.”
My stomach churned. I clenched my molars, trying to tamp down my anger. Why anyone would ever make Daisy feel bad about herself, I would never know.
“You gotta trust me, Sunshine. But more importantly, you have to trust yourself.” I held out my hand. “Swim with me?”
Daisy seemed to space out for a minute, but suddenly stood up. Her body was stiff, shoulders squared. She looked like a sweet country girl preparing for battle. I watched as she slipped out of her flip-flops and then unbuttoned her shorts. They slid down her long, tanned legs and I held my breath.
I fucking held my breath.
Her hand clutched the hem of her tank and pulled it over the top of her head. She threw it to the side and stood in front of me, arms wrapped around her middle.
“Daisy,” my voice cracked and I cleared my throat. “Let me see you.” My stomach twisted again and the sound of my heartbeat hammered in my ears. I’d swum with Daisy countless times as kids, but it occurred to me then that I hadn’t swum with her once in the four years I had been away in college.
With a hesitant downturn to her mouth, Daisy let her arms drop to her sides and stepped back.
Holy fucking shit.
A lot of changes can happen in four years.
One being, Daisy wore a bikini like no one I had ever seen before. Her breasts were large, which I knew, but I hadn’t glimpsed without a shirt covering them. Her bikini top was a black triangle cut and the cups barely contained her. Her cleavage was deep, showcasing how perky and round her tits really were.
I wanted to touch them, to hold them in my hands, so damn bad.
My eyes traveled south, over her waist, which was small but flared out at her hips. I held up one finger and twirled it in a circular motion. It was a dick move, but I was beyond caring. Her eyes flared as she turned slowly around. Mother of God. Her backside was unequaled, again, which I knew, but seen without jeans… I’d never recover. It jutted out, was a bit fuller than the average ass, but was round and firm and Christ, I needed to feel it. As she stopped twirling, I finished my tour, traveling over her legs that seemed to go on and on and ending at her toes that were painted a light baby blue.
It was official. I was a dead man. How was I supposed to control myself around her? My dick was jutting out, the cold water doing nothing to calm it down. Dragging in a deep breath, I submerged myself under the water. I swam a lap under the surface, before coming up with my back to her. I palmed myself and thought of something unpleasant, like hanging out with Mom’s boyfriends, until my boner receded.
Only then could I turn around. I watched as Daisy walked down the steps into the water. She walked halfway to me and paused, her eyebrows pulled together and a frown on that incredible mouth.
Fuck. She thought I was like the others. As if she wasn’t everything I fantasized about filling my hands, tasting in my mouth, having in my bed. I swam to her, tilting her chin up to look at me, but she focused off to the side of my shoulder. A damp strand of hair stuck to her neck and I tucked it behind her ear.
“Sunshine? Look at me.” My voice was raw with restraint.
Big blue eyes met mine, but hers were glassy.
“You are hands down the sexiest girl I have ever seen.” She stiffened, her eyes widening with shock.
“What?” she whispered the word, those big eyes now searching mine for an explanation.
I shook my head. “If those little bitches made fun of you, it’s because they were sick with jealousy. They are stick thin, and you have curves for miles. You have a woman’s body, Daisy. And it’s perfection.”
Daisy closed her eyes, and when she opened them, a tear ran down her cheek. “You really think so? I was convinced I was a freak. Nobody looked like me in high school.”
I know, I wanted to say. Which was why I was attracted to her when I shouldn’t have been or be. She still wasn’t eighteen. I couldn’t let myself say too much or get out of control with her.
“A body like yours is rare. You gotta own it. Be proud, Sunshine.”
Daisy focused on my lips, and I pressed them together before I said or did something stupid. “Jon, I want to…” Her voice trailed off.
Wanted to what? Kiss me? God, I hoped so. Even though it was a futile wish, just knowing she suffered fr
om the same desire would make me feel better.
She slipped away from me, submerging completely under the water and then coming back up, smoothing her hair away from her face.
I crossed my arms and frowned at her. “No way. Finish what you were about to say.”
Daisy shook her head dismissively. “It was nothing.”
I swam closer to her. “One of the things I would love for you to do this next year is to not only trust yourself, but to find your voice. Don’t be afraid to say what you think.”
She rolled her eyes at me and sighed. “I say what I think.”
“Prove it.” I floated closer. “Tell me what you were about to say.”
She paused and then made her decision. “Make me.” She pressed her lips together to hold back a grin and then dove under the water, swimming quickly to the deep end of the pool.
She was having fun. Relaxing. With me. A lightness filled my chest, and I realized that seeing her look so happy was making me happy. I wasn’t sure I ever felt that around a girl before.
And if she wanted to play, I’d play. I chased after her, but she was a quick little swimmer. She evaded my capture a few times before I finally caught her by the waist.
We were breathless, taking in large gulps of air and laughing. Daisy’s hair was wild, and her hands messed with it, tying it back into a braid.
I walked her backward into the deep end and as she lost her footing, she wrapped her legs around my waist.
I stopped walking, unsure of how to proceed. Friends didn’t play like this in a pool, did they? I was sure they didn’t, especially since all I could focus on was Daisy’s core so close to me. I grunted, shifting her in my arms so she wouldn’t touch my dick. I was hard as a rock again, and not even a long cold shower would help me now.
“Well, you got me.” She placed her hands on my shoulders and smiled, more relaxed than I had seen her in a while. “But I’m still not ready to tell you what I started to say. I will someday, but not today.”
“Okay,” I agreed. “As long as we get there eventually.”
Daisy pulled out of my arms. I missed the smell of her skin and the heat of her body immediately.
“What do we do now?” Her legs and arms moved in small circles as she tread water.
“Now we have fun.” I winked and then dove below her, grabbing her feet and pulling her under. I heard her squeal right before she was submerged and I smiled.
Baby steps. Over time, I hoped Daisy would trust me and learn to love herself. Only then would she ever be ready for someone else to love her in return.
As for me, I didn’t need love. I never had. I just needed my daily dose of Sunshine.
Chapter Seven
Daisy
TODAY I TURNED eighteen. Looking back over the last few years, this was a day I dreamed about. I was finally an adult, and with that title, I hoped for the freedom to live my life exactly how I wanted. I wasn’t quite there yet, but with some work, I believed it would happen.
Today was also my first full day of employment at Amy and her roommate, Izzy’s, apartment. I shadowed Maxine Lambert for the last two weeks, learning both the girls’ routines and what would be expected of me as their assistant.
Like Amy, Izzy was born with Down syndrome. Amy was a twenty-three-year-old blonde with almond-shaped blue eyes framed by bright pink glasses, and was on the short side with a rotund figure. The almond-shaped eyes, short stature, and body shape were about the only things these roommates had in common. Izzy had recently turned thirty and had dark curly hair, brown eyes, and no glasses. She always wore bright red lipstick, and she got her nails done every week, keeping them long and painted brightly.
Training with Helping Hands of Indianapolis had been informative, but challenging. I learned a ton, but there was so much need in the community. I was glad to provide help to fill a small portion of that need, and doing it while I helped Amy and Izzy live life as fully and independently as possible seemed like a great start.
The girls’ apartment was lovely. A red velvet couch was against a wall, facing a flat screen television. Two floral patterned chairs flanked each side of the sofa, with a shared glossy wooden end table in between each. Brass lamps sat on the end tables with coasters and small knickknacks. An oval coffee table housed remotes and a half-completed jigsaw puzzle.
Around the corner was a long hallway, where the bedrooms and bathrooms were located. The kitchen, with green countertops and brown cabinets, contained a small eat-in area with a table for two.
“What should we do today, ladies?” I asked the roommates. Amy handed me a warm shirt, and I folded it, placing it in the pile in front of me. Izzy sat next to me on the couch sorting socks.
Amy and Izzy’s smiles stretched wide across their faces.
“It is September tenth, your birthday, Daisy! We need to celebrate!” Amy said.
I picked up a pair of shorts and folded them. “Okay, I love to celebrate. What did you have in mind?”
“Bowling?” They said in unison and then collapsed into a fit of giggles.
I rubbed my hands together and nodded. “Bring it on.”
Amy’s eyes widened from behind her pink frames. “Daisy, you do know we play every Saturday?”
I shrugged. “I’ve played quite a few times myself.”
Izzy knocked her elbow into Amy’s. “For the last seven years, okay?”
Well, shit. I was going down. No happy birthday mercy for me.
~~~
As expected, they whipped my butt. Even with the loss, it was a great birthday. We went out for pizza afterward, and then I taught them to cook spaghetti Bolognese for dinner. Okay, it was spaghetti with meat sauce. But no processed ingredients were used. That was a victory in my book.
My mind drifted to Jon throughout the day. Would I see him? With the title of being my only friend these days, I kind of hoped for a text or a phone call to wish me a happy birthday. As immature as that thought was, I couldn’t shake it.
I drove home late that night. Being allowed to drive a company car was a big perk of the job. Without it, I would have no wheels. My foot pressed lightly on the gas, keeping me well under the speed limit. I wasn’t particularly excited to be home. I loved my family—adored them—but with Amy and Izzy I felt needed and important. The only other person I felt that way around was Jon.
That wasn’t all Jon made me feel, but none of those feelings were allowed. Or reciprocated. Or even worth mentioning. Hopefully, both of us would leave in less than a year to fulfill our dreams in different cities. That, coupled with the age difference, and the beast that was my brother… There was no reason to even think about Jon.
Except that I couldn’t stop thinking about him. And through my obsessive thoughts, I formulated a plan. If I was honest with myself, I wanted more than a call or a text for my birthday. I wanted Jon to be my first kiss. I wanted it to be him that guided me and showed me how to trust my body to act around a boy. As challenging as it would be for us to date someday, wouldn’t it be okay to be friends that only kiss or touch every once in a while?
And did I have the guts to ask him? If I did, I had to be prepared for him to say no. Asking for freaking tutoring on how to kiss was mortifying enough, but his rejection? The thought made my stomach flip.
With it being a weeknight, my parents insisted on throwing me a big birthday party on Saturday. What was the point? I had no one to invite. The thought used to depress me. Now it almost felt like motivation, spurring me onto a new start. A new life. It could only get better, right?
I switched off the ignition and bent forward, resting my forehead on the steering wheel. The sound of knocking on my car window caused me to scream before I could squelch it.
The sight of Jon’s face brought out a combination of emotions. Immediately I felt comfort, safety, and then an ache for everything I wanted but could never have.
I opened my door and eased out, closing and locking the car behind me. Jon stood a few feet away, arms crossed, eyes
hard, lips pressed flat.
“Take a walk?” His voice was gruff.
Was he mad at me? I didn’t think I did anything wrong, but he didn’t look happy.
Not at all.
I nodded, and he turned, walking toward the lake. I trailed behind him, but as soon as we left my yard, his hand found mine, and he grasped it tightly in his. We walked in silence. The only sounds to be heard were the crunching of leaves and sticks under our feet. When we broke through the small woods that separated my house from the lake, I inhaled deeply.
I loved the lake. It was my place to reflect and feel peaceful and centered. The last time I had been here with Jon was on the night of my graduation. Now, all this times later, I felt so much closer to him, but still so lost in my own life.
Jon stopped at the water’s edge and faced me. “Where were you all day? I’ve been waiting to see you.”
I swallowed hard, my throat dry. “It was my first day at work with Amy and Izzy. I helped them make dinner and clean up after.”
Jon’s face softened. “Did it go well?” He reached out, his fingers coming close to my face before he snatched them away, shoving his hands into his front pockets.
I grinned. “They’re a riot. You have to hang out with us sometime.”
“I’d like that.” Jon leaned closer to whisper in my ear. “Happy birthday, Sunshine.” His voice was hoarse and fraught with some emotion I couldn’t quite name.
“Thank you. It’s no big deal, though.” My voice sounded like I felt right now—weak.
Jon’s eyebrows pulled together. “You’re eighteen. An adult. That is a big deal.”
“Really? I don’t feel like an adult. My parents watch my every move. They still say I can’t leave Indiana next year. I have no close friends except my family and you. Nothing in my life is changing or moving forward in any way, and it’s really pissing me off.” I huffed and stomped my foot, effectively proving I was the opposite of an adult.
Jon tried to hide his smile, but I caught him and glared back. “Okay,” he wiped his hand over his mouth and regained his composure. “How can I help?”