by Duncan Lay
‘Why not? Still don’t like the truth? I thought you told us you wouldn’t lie any more? You have to face it — elves are just humans with a little more knowledge and magic.’
Sendatsu hesitated. Everything he had been told screamed at him to deny Huw’s words. But all he had learned out here shouted that Huw was right.
‘But we still can’t go around saying it,’ he protested. ‘It will get us all killed.’
‘The truth has to come out somehow.’
Sendatsu rolled his eyes. ‘We have to take this one step at a time. There are bigger things at stake here.’
‘Bigger? How can it get any bigger than what your people did to mine? How can anything be more important than restoring knowledge and magic to us?’
‘Survival! Don’t forget the elves are still your best hope against the Forlish.’
‘Makes me wonder who our real enemy is.’
‘We need to keep this to ourselves. Even if it is just for now,’ Sendatsu said soothingly. ‘Think of Rhiannon and the pressure this will put on her, when she has already been through so much!’
He saw that last comment strike through.
‘Maybe I should try to help her now,’ Huw suggested.
Sendatsu held him back. ‘She has to fight, and win, this battle herself. We will only make things worse,’ he warned. ‘You wait here. I’ll go and see her.’
Rhiannon stared at Hector’s body. He was still grotesquely impaled on a long branch, propped into a kneeling position. Blood and pieces of bone and flesh had sprayed out in front, gore still dripping and oozing down the branch and pooling on the ground beneath him. The stench where his bowels had opened in death was foul and she thought how much he would hate to be seen like this. He was a big man, twice her size, and part of her was thinking she should have made Sendatsu and Huw help her — he was too big for her to hope to move, let alone bury. But she could not bear them near her now.
She walked around Hector’s body until she could see his face. His last expression was agonised, his pain frozen for all time. His eyes bulged and his mouth was full of blood, his beard thick with it. She so much wanted to say something to him, but the words would not come, only tears. Rhiannon fell to her knees and sobbed for everything, starting with her lost childhood.
The knowledge that every part of her life was a lie was too much to fit inside her head.
And it was hard to think as it was. Everything seemed strange, as though the world had changed around her — which, in many ways, it had. Her senses seemed not just alive but super sensitive. It set her teeth on edge, for it felt like roughened cloth was being drawn not just across her skin but across every part of her being.
She tried to block that out.
Her earliest memories had been of her father training her for the stage. Training me to be his willing slave, so I could restore his reputation.
He told her she was gifted, that all would applaud her as brilliant, but she had to sacrifice everything if she was to win over the king.
He wanted to be hailed as a genius, wanted everyone in Forland falling at his feet. I was just an object to get him there.
Her life had been a lie.
She had believed he cared, believed he loved her. All the sacrifices she had made, the times she had pushed herself beyond her limit to please him — they had seemed worth it when she thought it was done for love.
It was done for a lie.
He had created a dream for her, given her a path to follow. He had guided her towards Cridianton and the king’s auditions, persuaded her to show everyone her skills. He had filled her head with thoughts of applause, of a reputation as the finest dancer since the elven days.
Instead he was grooming her for his own plans. He would have succeeded too. She could recognise that. The habit of obeying him was so strong, she would have agreed to be Ward’s mistress, even though the thought revolted her. And then her father would have discarded her, like a soiled shoe, after promising her it would make their fortune.
Lies, yet more lies.
It would have worked — except Huw had overheard him and tricked her into escaping Cridianton. But Huw had also given her the story of how Hector had sacrificed himself for her. How he had laid down his life to save her from Ward’s clutches. She had wept every night, thinking it had been his last gift to her.
A lie.
So many lies, all clambering on top of each other, threatening to drown her.
Hector had lied. Sendatsu had lied. Huw had lied.
It was too much and her tears disappeared in an instant, wiped out by a blazing anger.
‘Why? Why? Why?’ She punched and then kicked at her father’s body.
Hector’s body wobbled and shook under her blows until, finally, it slumped over to the side, the branch cracking and tearing away.
‘Was everything really a lie? Answer me, curse you!’ She flung herself down, struck his familiar and loved–hated face as he had hit her not long before.
If only he was alive, so she could tell him the truth about herself …
‘I want you to listen, Father,’ she announced.
She began to talk about the things she had done, the people she had helped, the children she had saved.
‘I am not just a singer and dancer. I am more than that. I can do magic, like no other human.’
She got to her feet and looked down at his face.
‘I don’t know what I am going to do now. But whatever it is, it will be my choice. I shall never do what a man wants, ever again. Only what I want. I don’t need men to guide my life or advise me. I shall make my own mistakes now, find my own path through life. The future you saw for me is gone, now I make my own. It’s not much of a gift but I thank you for it anyway. I don’t mourn you. I regret I never had the chance to say this to your face, that is all.’
She nodded once, sending a tear down to splash onto his face.
‘That is the last thing you shall have from me,’ she said.
She stared down at Hector with mingled loathing and anguish, wishing the ground would swallow him up. She had wished it often enough for herself when he had embarrassed her beyond words.
But this time it was different. This time it actually began to happen. For a long moment she thought she was imagining it, but the plants around him were slipping away, the ground welcoming him, his body slowly disappearing. She felt tired, as though she had just run a long way, and her muscles wanted to stop but she was determined not to, until she would never see him again.
He vanished beneath the earth, all evidence of him, from the branch that impaled him to the blood and shit and bone it had painted across the ground. She fell to her knees, only partly through tiredness. She had extracted revenge for his betrayal and lies but that only made her actions worse. She loved him, she hated him, she had killed him. She felt as though oblivion would be the greatest relief. She could lie down, force herself beneath the earth the way she had with her father …
It was dangerously tempting.
Then she felt the plants above his grave, sensed not just them but every insect and animal around as well.
She could do magic. She clutched at the thought to stop the tidal wave of darkness within her.
What would she do, where would she go? How could she use this gift? The feeling of magic surging through her blood, the intensity of the sensations as she reached out to the living things around her was stronger even than the thrill of performing. But could she use it again without thinking of her father?
She jumped to her feet and thought about running then — she did not know where, she just wanted to get away, find somewhere she would not have to think.
‘Rhiannon! Are you all right?’
She’d thought she would never be happy to hear Sendatsu’s voice, or see his face — but now she was.
‘Help me,’ she begged, sinking to the ground again.
2
Once we lived in peace, worshipping Aroaril, using magic and living well, at o
ne with the land that had kept us safe for hundreds of years. But then the elves came.
Huw’s song
To the south and west, Forlish scouts raced back to Cridianton, to report to King Ward. They had spent the last quarter-moon easing their way through the Velsh countryside. All had seen the same. Village after village boasted log walls, while crude flags — a red dragon on a white background — fluttered from above. Life seemed to be going on as normal but they could not fail to notice men and women training with strange crossbows that were able to spit out bolts at a ridiculously fast rate. The other disturbing thing was the lack of Forlish. They had been told more than five hundred warriors had been loosed on the Velsh. But they saw no sign of them — or of villages cowering in terror.
The Velsh also had patrols out, men with dogs — and the scouts learned to stay away from them. They had expected an easy duty but it swiftly became as dangerous as anything Balia had to offer — and they hurried home to tell their king.
‘Are you all right?’
Rhiannon laughed, a sound without humour, which echoed around the clearing and made the trees seem to strain at the ground.
‘I shall never be all right again,’ she told him, her voice more than a little wild. ‘I have magic and I used it to kill my father!’
‘No, you used your magic to save us all. Twice!’ Sendatsu told her strongly.
‘But I didn’t need to kill my father. I didn’t need to kill any of them! I wanted to make them pay …’
‘They deserved to pay. They were torturing us, were going to rape you. I would have done the same, had I the power,’ he declared.
‘But why did I kill my father?’
He grabbed her by the shoulders. He had no idea if he was doing the right thing but she was not ready to listen to sense. The only thing he could think of was how he broke through to Mai or Cheijun when they dissolved into uncontrollable tears or tantrums.
‘Listen to me!’ he barked. ‘You saved us all. What happened with your father was an accident —’
‘No! I wanted to do it! At first I was going to bring him down but then I wanted it to pierce his black heart — and it did!’
Sendatsu paused. This was going to be both harder and easier than he thought. She had to get training and help with her magic and he was sure she would agree with him now. But getting her to Dokuzen safely looked like it might be as difficult as getting her out again.
‘You cannot change the past. But he deserved it. You are not to blame —’
‘Then who is?’
‘Hector! He brought this on. My father wants me dead and sent those elves you stopped out here to kill me. So believe me when I say I know a little of what you are feeling. But you cannot blame yourself.’
‘But I do!’
She dissolved into tears and he held her awkwardly, patting her gently, acutely aware of the last time they had been this close. He was amazed she was letting him hold her. For close to a moon she had talked about sending a crossbow bolt through his tongue or something lower down. But he guessed she needed someone to cling to and it could not be Huw.
‘It is hard, I know how much you must be hurting. But, in time, you will see you had no choice. You were not to blame. You are a special person. Your magic is a gift, not a curse. Come with me to Dokuzen. There you can find the teachers who will help you guide your magic. Join me in Dokuzen and you will understand.’
Gradually the storm of tears passed and she pushed herself away.
‘What should I do? I cannot control this magic inside me — I do not even know how it works. Can they really help me in Dokuzen?’ she asked softly.
Sendatsu had sworn never to lie to her again. But this was not really a lie, he told himself. They could help her in Dokuzen. He was sure Asami would help — his heart leaped at the thought of seeing his true love again, even if her husband and his best friend Gaibun would frown. Not telling her about the triangle of plotting and hatred between the Magic-weavers led by Sumiko, the Elder Elf Daichi, and his father and clan leader Jaken was not the same as a lie.
‘They will. And you need them. Without training, anything is possible — there is the real chance you will kill yourself. The head of the Magic-weavers, Sumiko, used to tell us that all the time, although, with me, she usually added that would make her happy,’ he said in a desperate attempt to make her smile. She did not. ‘If you come with me to Dokuzen, you will find teachers of magic. Sumiko is their leader and while I am not her favourite student, Asami is. With her aid, we can get help for you.’
‘Help?’
‘You need to learn about the magic. I know Asami will help you. With her, you can unlock your full power.’
For the first time, he saw a spark return to her eyes.
‘I could save the Velsh. I could stop the Forlish,’ she said slowly. ‘I could do anything!’
‘First you need to learn how to use it properly. Use too much magic and you might be eaten up by it.’
‘With this power, I shall control my own destiny,’ she said softly. ‘No man, not even King Ward of Forland, can make me do anything!’
Sendatsu took a deep breath. ‘That’s right.’
He met her eyes, seeing the power behind them as they bored into him. He knew she did not entirely trust him but there was nobody else who could speak to her about magic. She had been ready to fall apart; magic gave her a reason to hold herself together. Her old life was in ruins — magic was something she could rebuild around.
‘Why haven’t humans with magic come along before? Why haven’t we found magic until now?’
Sendatsu grimaced. ‘That is the real question. Are you the first, or have there been others who never discovered how to unlock their power? When did you discover it worked for you?’
‘When I felt you do magic,’ she said. ‘Something in me changed when I met you and every time you did magic, it grew a little stronger, until my father —’
‘Well, there you are!’ Sendatsu hurriedly interrupted. His mind was racing and he thought of the book he carried. Did it have anything about humans and magic? ‘We need proper help for you. I am not good enough. I did not pay enough attention in my classes, and my teacher hated me because of my father. When it comes to understanding your gift and developing it, you would be better off asking one of the village dogs!’
She did not smile at his weak jest.
‘Perhaps we can learn together,’ she suggested.
Sendatsu hesitated. ‘We can work together, certainly. But as far as testing the limits of what we can do, it is better to perhaps wait until we are in Dokuzen, and you can talk to Asami,’ he added, feeling a touch of excitement at the thought.
‘So you can’t help me now?’
‘Well, yes, I can,’ he admitted. ‘I do remember a little, of course. We can practise the few techniques I remember from my old lessons —’
‘How about now?’
He looked at her, trying to see if she was joking, but there was not a trace of a smile on her face. She had always looked so open, so trusting — now there seemed to be harder lines around her eyes and mouth. It saddened him to see, because he knew he was the cause of some of them.
Then he sighed, racking his brain for the first simple exercises Asami had taught him. ‘Why not?’
Huw managed to get Glyn across the saddle of a horse, although the effort made every muscle burn, and every burn he had taken feel as though they would rip him apart. His misery was almost complete. His only hope now was Rhiannon knowing the full truth about her father. One day, perhaps, she would accept Huw had only lied to save her.
It was a faint hope.
He told himself he had to put aside thoughts of Rhiannon and concentrate on Vales. In losing one, he had gained the means to save the other. Although it could save the lives of thousands of his people, he did not think it a fair trade. He punished himself mercilessly for not telling Rhiannon the truth earlier. How could he have been so stupid? His mind jumped from idea to idea, search
ing for a way to win back her trust. He discarded every one. There was no time, because no doubt she would go to Dokuzen to learn more about her magic.
Huw snapped his fingers, startling the horse, and he calmed it as he pursued that thought. Rhiannon needed to learn how to use her new powers but going to Dokuzen was a real risk. If the elves had managed to make everyone believe they were a different race, the only one with magic, and that humans were barbarians, then what would they do to keep their secrets? Rhiannon’s life would be nothing to them. Against that was Sendatsu’s promise of returning with both Rhiannon and an elven army.
But it had come from Sendatsu. That meant Huw instinctively distrusted it.
Sendatsu’s backers had all they needed in Rhiannon, although his enemies had everything they feared. Sendatsu was only interested in getting his children back. He would not mean Rhiannon harm but could he keep her safe?
Huw decided he had to go with them, no matter what. Rhiannon would need him, even if she did not want him. There would come a way to show her that he truly cared for her.
Decision made, he led the horses down the trail, Glyn’s body swaying grotesquely as they went. He turned away from the sight of the oak tree where he had waited to marry Rhiannon — and where her father had tortured and beaten him — only to see Rhiannon and Sendatsu sitting together, talking softly.
‘Huw!’
Sendatsu saw him first and jumped to his feet, acting strangely. It reminded Huw unpleasantly of those weeks when Sendatsu had tricked Rhiannon into being his lover.
‘What are you doing?’
‘Just talking,’ the elf said, hurrying over to intercept him. ‘I wouldn’t go and talk to her just yet,’ he warned. ‘She’s not ready to speak to you.’
‘But happy to talk with you?’
‘Well, she has had longer to get used to the idea of me as a liar,’ Sendatsu said wryly. ‘She’s still coming to terms with you being one.’
Huw winced at the words and Sendatsu pressed his advantage.
‘Rhiannon is coming with me to Dokuzen,’ he said.