After 30 minutes of slow quiet walking Stephanie sat down next to large tree trunk that was lying on its side in the dry sand. It had washed up a few weeks earlier as things tend to do along the Lake Michigan shoreline. And this was one of the spots she usually liked to sit. She opened her backpack and pulled out a large towel for her and Shadow to sit on. But usually her dog preferred to lie sprawled out in the sand soaking in the sun. Stephanie sat down and rummaged through her backpack again looking for the dog treats she kept in it for Shadow. The large and now very wet dog wandered up after shaking the water off of her and plopped down in the sand next to the towel, only laying her head on it. Stephanie gave Shadow a long scratch on the head and laid some dog treats next to her mouth that she ate instantly, causing Stephanie to laugh a little bit.
“Good girl,” she said.
Stephanie smiled and leaned back against the log and closed her eyes, and let the heat from the setting sun warm her skin. As she sat there her mind wondered to Thomas and far off places, places she had never seen except in pictures. She wondered what he was doing at that moment. If he was looking across a different much larger expanse of blue water and what he was thinking about. She wondered who he was with, if he was alone, and if he was happy. She wondered what his friends were like too; Derrick never said much about their friends. Sitting there staring out over the lake she wondered also if he missed her, if he ever thought of her. Somewhere deep inside although she didn’t know how, she knew that he did miss her.
Some things never change, and she knew Thomas very well, at least the Thomas from five years ago. But for some reason she felt the love that Thomas had for her never died. She assumed he moved on with other women, or tried at least, she expected that. But deep down she knew he still loved her, someway or somehow that love still existed in his heart. She knew how much he had loved her, and she knew how hard it was for Thomas to allow himself to love someone as much as he loved her. She thought of the five years that she had been without him in her life, and all that she had been through. She wondered what he had been through, how much had he and his life changed since he left Michigan. She pulled her knees up to her chest and laid her chin on them.
She looked over at Shadow who had fallen asleep in the sun, then looked over at her backpack that was lying next to her and thought about the envelope inside. “Well no time like now” she said out loud to herself as she reached inside the bag and grabbed the envelope and pulling it out. She held it in her hands and thinking about everything Karen had earlier said and had inferred. Karen was right this was a big deal, this was turning point and she couldn’t take it lightly. She thought quietly for a moment or two wondering about the pictures inside and what they were of. Without even thinking Stephanie slowly opened the envelope and gently pulled the first of the three pictures out. Her hands were shaking as the top of the first picture came out the top of the envelope.
She pulled the first picture out and held it in her still shaking hands and just stared at it smiling. Stephanie’s heart felt like it was beating a thousand miles an hour. She put her hand over her mouth, and a tear ran from the corner of her eye and down her cheek.
The first picture was of Thomas walking on the beach, with two dogs in front of him. She recognized one of the dogs; it was Harley a large yellow Labrador. Thomas had her back when he still lived in Michigan. Stephanie couldn’t believe she was still alive after all this time. The other dog she could tell was a mastiff and must have been a new addition. The picture was in color and showed every detail, every line and feature. Stephanie looked at every little thing not wanting to miss any detail. He appeared to be looking directly at whoever was taking the picture and saying something. Thomas was wearing tan cargo pants that were rolled up to the calf, and a long sleeve button up black shirt. The shirt was only buttoned half way and revealed his chest hair; the sleeves were rolled up just below the elbows. He was wearing sunglasses and had a big smile on his face, she loved his smile.
She noticed that Thomas’ hair was a little longer than it was before he left Michigan and had a large amount of grey on the sides. She realized immediately that he had lost weight and firmed up, he was still a big man and always had been, but he looked fantastic. He was barefoot as he was walking on the beach and his skin looked tanner than she remembered it ever being. She could see a tall rocky cropping going out into the ocean behind him that was surrounded by large waves and mist. The beach Thomas was walking on was lined on one side by large trees, greener than anything Stephanie had ever seen before. Even five, six, or seven years ago she thought Thomas was attractive for an older guy, whether she ever told him or not. But now he looked more handsome than she ever had thought before, more than she could have imagined. Thomas used to say to her that “we get better with age” and he was right again. She ran a single fingertip of hers over his face and chest, as another tear ran down her face. She set the picture down on a dry part of the towel and wondered how in the hell Karen managed to get such a good picture of him. She looked around to see if anyone else was around and reached one hand out and began petting Shadow behind the ears.
“I think you would have liked him, Shadow, and Harley too,” she said to Shadow who raised her head slightly and licked Stephanie’s hand.
Stephanie sat for a moment running her hands through her hair. Periodically glancing down at the first picture and smiling. Seeing Thomas again, even just in a picture made her heart beat fast and wildly. She was expecting to feel that way but she wasn’t fighting the feelings either. Even just seeing him in a picture made her feel happier than she had in a long time.
Stephanie took a sip out of the bottle of water that was resting next to her. Then, slowly she reached for the envelope in her backpack and grabbed it. She was still nervous, but not as much this time. She pulled out the second picture and looked at it. This next one made her smile also; it was a picture of Thomas and Derrick sitting on a deck of a grey building. There was a door in between the two of them. They had their feet up on the top of the railing and were holding coffee cups. They were both wearing sunglasses, and were waiving at the person taking the picture. Derrick had a cigarette in his mouth but Thomas did not. Before Thomas left Michigan he was a heavy smoker, Stephanie wondered if Thomas had quit finally, he obviously was taking better care of himself now. She was surprised at how much older Derrick looked now, but he also looked good. He had seemed to be a little more built than he had been before. Thomas was wearing the same thing he had been in the other picture so this one must have been taking that same day. Derrick was wearing jeans with black chaps over them and black boots. He had a t-shirt with a leather vest over it. Derrick was a motorcycle fanatic and seemed to be dressed for a day of riding. The two of them seemed very happy and looked like they were enjoying themselves, just sitting having coffee and enjoying the day. Derrick didn’t send her pictures all that often and it had been a while since he had. She loved seeing the two of them together it made her smile.
Stephanie set the picture down on top of the first one. She was starting to get hungry and imagined Shadow was getting there also. They would have to leave soon and the sun was beginning to set anyway. She pulled out the last picture and almost dropped it as she took her first long glance at it. She started shaking again and she could feel her heart start to beat faster than before.
Thomas was sitting on the rail of a pickup truck with one foot resting on top of the wheel well. He was wearing blue jeans that had holes in them and black boots. He had a white long sleeved shirt on that again had the sleeves slightly rolled up. She could see the muscles in his biceps through the shirt. He didn’t have sunglasses on this time like in the other pictures, and she could see the short beard that lined his jaw line and cheek. She remembered that Thomas had always had either a well-trimmed beard or a goatee. He was holding a white cup in his hand that had a spoon sticking out the top of it. He had a big smile on his face and appeared to be laughing. Seeing his smile made her heart beat faster, she always loved hi
s smile. Sitting across from him on the opposite wheel well of the truck was the biggest shock. It was something she wasn’t expecting to see and brought her even more questions than answers.
It was a young boy; he looked like he was around 6 years old or so. He had shorts and a striped polo shirt on and he wore sandals. He was wearing sunglasses and had messy blonde hair. His knees were bent and he was holding an ice cream cone in one hand and was pointing at Thomas and laughing. It was sunny out and the truck they were sitting in was parked on the side of a street. She could see people walking past the truck and down the street, signs for different business’s hanging from above. Stephanie put the picture down and tried to control her shaking. She sat quietly for a minute, watching the sunset dip slowly beneath the horizon. A hundred different thoughts and feelings were going through her mind and heart. She already had a lot of questions to ask Karen. The first question was obvious and was the thing she wondered about the most, was who that little boy was?
She reached over and started picking up her things and putting them into her backpack. Shadow had gotten up and was staring at Stephanie and waiting patiently with her tail brushing across the top of sand. Stephanie stood up and began her long walk back her SUV, quietly in thought the entire time.
A short while later Stephanie was heading east down the dark highway and back towards her home. Shadow was already asleep and stretched out in the back seat. The picture of Thomas and the boy was sitting on the front seat. Stephanie had the window down slightly and was resting her head on her left hand as she drove, periodically looking over at the picture.
“Who is that boy…it can’t be his son; he’s too old to be Thomas’ son,” she said to herself.
She reached for her cell phone and quickly typed out a text message to Karen letting her know she was on her way home and when she would be there. Before she even got a response she was already typing a second message:
IS THAT HIS SON KAREN??
She kept driving and was trying to be as patient as she could while she waited for a response from Karen. She tapped her finger nails on the steering wheel as she waited and kept looking down at her cell phone that was between her legs. A few minutes later the response came she was waiting for, but not the answer she wanted:
Just calm down, I’ll meet you at your house!!
Stephanie took a deep calming breath. The shaking had finally stopped, hopefully whatever Karen had in that folder would give her some answers to the questions she had. She reached over and picked up the picture and looked at it again. She set it down and rolled her window all the way down and let the wind hit her face. She glanced at the clock on her radio, it was about 9:30 there was about 15 minutes left of driving to do, and passed the time in silent nervous thought.
Eight
Thomas sat on the couch in his living room. The brown coffee table in front of him was completely covered with playing cards. On the other side of the table sat Tracie on the floor next to Daniel. They were playing Five Card Draw using chips, and at this point Tracie was beating both Thomas and his son. Of course, Thomas was losing on purpose but he was still having fun while doing it. He reached over to the table in front of him, grabbed the glass of wine sitting there, and took a sip from it. His son was having a great time, and loved seeing Tracie at their house again.
Dinner went better than expected despite a few kitchen mishaps. After Thomas picked up the dogs from the veterinarian and Daniel from school, they went to the grocery store. Thomas and his son were fussy about dinner, and they switched ideas more often than either had the patience for. Daniel wanted crab legs, but Thomas knew Tracie was not a huge fan of seafood. After a couple of different tries, they settled on chicken fajitas. Daniel made sure his seat was closest to Tracie while they ate. Daniel had a huge crush on Tracie, which she was well aware of and thought very adorable. He got all dressed up and even wore a tie during dinner. Tracie told him several times how handsome he looked and made his tiny ego even bigger. Since Thomas cooked dinner, Tracie insisted on cleaning up and doing the dishes and Daniel insisted on helping her. The one benefit of having Tracie over for dinner was that Daniel on his best behavior. Even more than usual, he acted very gentlemanly. Some women would get annoyed very fast by a 7-year-old boy being this overly flirtatious and clingy. However, Tracie did not at all she played it off with an amazing amount of grace and humor. In many ways she was, and had been as close as family to both Daniel and his father, they were all very comfortable around each other.
Thomas looked at his cell phone that was sitting on the table; it was almost 9:45. Normally his son was in bed around nine but he let him stay up a little bit longer since they had company. Thomas realized the fire in his old stone fireplace was getting a little low, so he got up and threw two more logs on it. Then he turned around to talk to his son.
“Hey little man, I’m sorry but it’s time to get ready for bed,” he said looking down at the boy.
“Dad, please just a little bit longer?” the boy replied.
“I’m sorry Kiddo, but it almost ten. I already let you stay up later, don’t pretend you didn’t notice.”
Daniel got a sad look on his face, but seemed to be thinking about what his father had said. Tracie saw the familiar sad look come across Daniels face and leaned over and gave the little boy big hug. “How about I tuck you in tonight Danny, does that sound okay. Then you can see me for a few more minutes, as long as it is okay with Tommy…I mean your dad at least “she said to the boy. That made the boys ears perk up a little bit. He liked it when Tracie called him Danny; she was the only person that he was okay with using that name.
“Okay, Dad it’s cool; but only if Tracie tucks me in tonight,” he said as he stared down his dad, making Thomas laugh a bit.
“Yeah that’s fine why don’t you go brush your teeth and change for bed all right?” Thomas said, making his son beam with excitement; Daniel literally jumped up and ran down the hallway and into the bathroom.
Thomas sat down and looked over at Tracie who was looking at him and sort of biting her lower lip like she does when she had something to say but won’t. She stood up and sat on the couch next to him and rested her head on his shoulder and rested one hand on his forearm.
“Thank you for this Tommy,” she said. Tracie only called him Tommy when they were outside of work. It was something Thomas never minded and actually liked.
“For what Darlin?” he said slowly not sure what Tracie meant.
“For dinner and just tonight I guess, I really needed it. I like seeing you outside of work, sometimes I forget you’re a normal person when you’re not at work.” she said as she looked up at him.
“Well I do my best, I hope Daniel wasn’t being too clingy with you,” he asked her
“No, not at all, he’s great. I love that kid. You were kind of fun to hang out with tonight too, you old man. And you’re an okay cook I guess,” Tracie said with a cheesy smirk as she gently poked Thomas in the rib with her finger.
Thomas looked at her, smiled and said, “Well us single guys do what we can,” as he stretched his arms out to his sides.
Thomas and Tracie sat quietly for a few minutes relaxing and just stared into the fireplace. Neither one said a word to the other. A few minutes later Daniel came walking into the living room smiling all dressed and ready for bed.
“You ready to hit the hay bud?” Thomas asked his son
“Sure am Dad, brushed my teeth and everything. Is it still okay if Tracie tucks me in tonight?” Daniel asked quietly
“It’s okay with me Kiddo, I think she’s kind of looking forward to it anyway,” his dad answered as he looked at Tracie and smiled.
She smiled back and slowly stood up and reached out her hand towards Daniel. “Come on handsome, let’s get you in there,” she said to him.
Daniel turned and gave his father a hug goodnight and grabbed Tracie by the hand and started toward the hallway that led to the bedroom.
“Good night Kiddo. Tracie when yo
u’re done I’ll be out on the deck okay?” he said smiling.
“Okay, see you in a few,” Tracie said with a wink and a smile, then flipping her long black hair as she walked away.
All Thomas got from his son was a small wave as he walked away.
Thomas picked up the poker cards and chips and put them in a drawer in the coffee table. He grabbed the empty wine glasses off the table and set them on the counter next to the sink. Then he walked out the slider door in the kitchen and out onto the deck. He leaned his large frame on the railing causing it to creak and got lost in thought.
It was a nice night out and not all that cool. The wind was light and Thomas could, in the moonlight see the ocean in front of him. The waves weren’t terribly big; it was somewhat calm by Pacific Coast standards. Thomas decided to start a small fire. He walked over to the stone fire pit and threw some logs into it. He shoved some small pieces of wood and newspaper underneath. Deciding to cheat he squirted some lighter fluid onto the paper underneath to get it going faster.
As he stood there waiting for the fire to improve he thought about his son inside. Daniel was only nearly eight, but he had daringness with the ladies that made him seem a few years older when it came to maturity. For only being a 7-year-old, the boy was an incredible flirt, something he may have picked up from his father. Thomas wasn’t sure whether to be nervous or proud of that learned attribute. Although in many ways Daniel was just like his mother Sarah. But occasionally bits of Thomas would show through in Daniel’s personality and attitude. He briefly wondered if his son would try and plant a big kiss on Tracie’s lips and he laughed hard at the thought of it. He couldn’t be mad if he did though, and Tracie would know how to handle Daniel if he did try.
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