He gaped at her. “I’m fine. Listen, I can’t send you back out into this weather, but once it clears you need to go back. I’ll call my parents once I can get a signal.”
“They want you to—”
“I know what they want. Mom wants me home, thinks I’ve fallen off the deep end because of work, and she wants to hover over me. No thank you.”
“Was it something at work that brought you up here? For months?” She didn’t know how much he’d share with her, but she had to try to discover what troubled him. With their past, and their history, she should have thought her decision to invade his privacy through, but helping his parents was important to her.
He leaned forward, elbows on his knees, and glared at her. “None of your damn business.”
Angry energy rolled off his body. It shattered the cozy calmness of the room and caused her to shiver. She thought back to the last time she’d seen him like this. A young girl had been killed and left on a roadside like a piece of trash. He’d suffered the loss of that little girl a lot.
Right afterward had been the last time they’d had sex. He’d used her body then left without a word. Why couldn’t things ever be easy with this man?
Her addiction. A drug. She craved him when he wasn’t around, hated herself for wanting him regardless of how often he left her. Oh, he’d always been respectful and made sure the sex had been satisfying. But she wanted more. She suspected he knew her true feelings for him, but he’d never said anything. Probably why he kept his distance.
He always put up a fight with her before he’d give in and open up, but she knew him too well not to try. When he became defensive—something was bothering him.
“Talking about it might help.” She slid closer to him, laid a hand on his shoulder. “Did something happen at work?”
Head hanging, he drew in a shuddering breath. “A lot of things have happened.”
Shanay’s heart surged as he spoke. This time seemed to be a bit easier. He did need someone to talk to.
“Did Mom tell you about my partner?”
She nodded. “Alicia, yes. So heartbreaking. She survived the kidnapping though, didn’t she? She is all right?”
He leaned back against the sofa, eyes on the ceiling. “She came back to work too soon, didn’t take precautions as she should have, made some serious mistakes. I had to…” His jaw clenched, and she placed a hand on his thigh, squeezing encouragement, “I had to report her to the chief. She got suspended.”
“Oh,” she exclaimed. “I’m sure she knew you had to do it for her own well-being. And for yours.”
“Yeah, but partners don’t snitch on one another.”
“You were protecting both of you. You had her back by doing so.”
His face blank, she couldn’t tell what thoughts ran through his head.
“I’m worried about you being up here all alone. For months. Something is obviously troubling you. Why can’t you tell me?”
His lifted his head and frowned. “Always willing to help me out, aren’t you?” he said, anger and sarcasm in his tone.
She sidled away from him a few inches, reached for her cup, and took a sip of her tea while she collected herself. His tone—more emotionless than she’d ever heard it—worried her. She had to continue battling with him. He needed help.
“Of course I am,” she said as pleasantly as possible. “We’ve known each other most of our lives. What kind of pal would I be if I didn’t try to get you talking?”
“I wouldn’t call us pals, sweetheart.”
She shivered but lifted her chin and met his gaze, unflinching, as her heart plummeted. Yes, they had a fucked up relationship, but she’d hoped he considered them friends, too.
“Is that how you think of us?”
Shanay refused to let him bait her. “When do you think you’re coming down off this mountain? It’s not like you to hide from things.”
She would convince him to return to the land of the living. Kicking and screaming, if she had to. She refused to think of him, rage bottled inside, hurting without an outlet to break free.
Annoyance swirled in the depths of his grassy-green eyes. Good, she was getting to him.
“Go to hell,” he ordered.
“Tsk, tsk. Come on, sweetheart, that’s not nice. I’m trying to help you.”
He laughed, but it held little humor. “You want to help me, do you? Oh, honey, I can think of better ways.”
He wanted her. She recognized the husky warmth of his tone. She hadn’t buried her head in the sand about what might happen when she came up here. His mother had mentioned someone named Isabella. Had Ethan found someone he wanted to spend the rest of his life with? Was it time to give him up and move on?
Forcing back her nerves, she goaded. “What, no woman to take care of those needs for you?”
He leaned forward, and her heart raced. “If there were a woman in my life, you can damn guarantee she’d be up here with me and I’d be fucking her every possible way. If you have a question, spit it out.”
She damned herself for falling in love with this man years ago, knowing he might never feel the same. Helpless and unable to fight him, as well as herself, she whispered, “Then let me help you.”
Sex wouldn’t solve any problems. Oh, how well she understood that. But for a while she could find the fire she craved in his arms and the loneliness would ease. Hands bracketing her head, he held her in place and sought her lips. His glorious taste filled her mouth, intoxicating. The taste of coffee and Ethan captured her heart and soul.
Tugging the top of the blanket lower, he exposed her breasts and palmed her flesh. Weak-kneed, she clutched at his gray T-shirt for support, reveling in the feel of his fingers pinching and flicking each nipple.
He pulled away, stared deep into her eyes, and smoothed his thumb over her lips. “You make me lose control. No matter how hard I try not to want you.”
She tugged his shirt over his head, admiring how his bronze skin glistened in the dim light. “Losing control is good in my opinion.”
He grinned at her then reached for the blanket bunched at her waist and gave it a hard tug, and dragged her naked form into his lap. His hardness pressed against her pussy. She shivered, thrilled at his take-charge attitude. His lips sought her nipple drawing it into his warm mouth. Her head fell back. A deep moan escaped when he pressed both mounds close and moved his tongue from one to the other.
Her inner muscles clenched, heat pooling in her core. She wanted him deep inside her, to drown in everything he had to offer.
Grasping a handful of his hair, she dragged him up where she could kiss him. She bit at his lower lip, hands gliding down to grip his shoulders as she rubbed against him.
His hand slid down her body, as the other clasped the nape of her neck, and rolled her clit between the thumb and index finger. She spread wider to grant him greater access, needing his touch.
“Christ, you’re so hot.”
Her skin sizzled with the heat of his fingers circling her clit, playing in her wet pussy. She climbed toward release, but she struggled to prolong the moment, keep his touch on her longer.
She needed him. Now. Light and easy wasn’t an option. Not this time. It had been so long….
Easing from his lap, she crawled toward the ottoman in front of the fireplace and draped herself over it. Ass in the air, she eyeballed him over her shoulder, and waited. It wouldn’t be for long.
Ethan stood and approached her, gaze smoldering. Oh yes, just what she liked. That predatory look in his eyes. The hunter seeking his prey. And she was all his.
He dropped his pants to the floor, kicking them aside.
“Raise your ass higher.”
She didn’t hesitate. She understood his preference for being dominant. “Yes, sir,” Shifting, she pulled her hips higher on the ottoman. Her fingers curved around the arms of the chair in front of it. She knew exactly what he liked. Juices flooded her pussy. She’d give him whatever he wanted.
“
I don’t have condoms here.”
Her head lifted toward him. “I’m still on the pill.”
He nodded.
He knelt behind her, caressed her ass cheeks. She smiled at him before facing forward again, lifting her butt higher, legs spread, open for him. She imagined his pleasure at the sight, her juices glistening, showing her desire for him.
She shrieked when a hand came down on her cheek. Her nipples grazed against the fabric of the ottoman sending sparks of electricity along her skin. She lifted her ass further. He slapped her again. Once. Twice. A third time. A harsh cry escaped her.
Lightning flashed, illuminating the cabin. His palm skimmed her pussy, making the skin burn. Her heart beat in rhythm with the thunder claps from the storm raging outside. He stirred a whirlwind of emotions. Ups and downs, shivers and passion, a never ending gale-force wind circled.
He sank rough, calloused digits inside her and grazed her sweet spot. She rocked back against them, grinding, demanding more.
“You love these inside you, don’t you, baby? Three of them stretching you, hitting that wild spot I love so much.”
“Yes. God, yes.”
He slapped her on the ass. “Yes, what?”
She jerked, reminded of her place in their games. “Yes, sir. Yes, I love it.”
“Good girl.” They moved in and out of her, powerful and relentless. She rocked her hips, and they went deeper. She gasped. The need to come rushed against her fast and hard.
But he withdrew and chuckled, enraging her. She pushed back toward him, desperate for his touch.
“Damn you,” she growled. He always tied her up in knots playing with her like this.
He gave her ass a swat. “Settle down.”
Surprising her, he clasped her waist. His cock nudged against her swollen pussy and slid inside. Her walls twitched and tightened around him. They both grunted when his dick hit home.
She curled her arms under her. Her body moved in time to his thrusts, ass smacking against his stomach, his balls slapping against her folds.
“Fucking Christ! You make me crazy,” he snapped.
His hand slid into the hair against her neck. Fisting the dark tresses, he pulled her head back and hammered against her. Over and over, unrelenting. Ruthless. She loved when he was like this with her.
She pulled and tweaked her nipples. Goosebumps spread over her heated skin.
“I love when you play with yourself. Reach down for your clit.”
Shanay shifted and slid her hand between her legs. She purred as liquid coated her skin. She rolled them over the flesh, shuddering at the added sensation. Her pussy clenched around his cock.
“That’s it, baby. You’re so tight. Fuck.”
His left hand slid from her hair and pressed against her back, forcing her breasts into the cushion. His right hand clasped her waist with bruising force. She didn’t mind. She loved when he pummeled her like this, lost in the passion taking him.
He belonged to her alone in these moments.
Butterflies fluttered in her stomach as she rushed toward release.
“Come for me, baby. Shit, you feel so fuckin’ good.”
“Yes. Sir, yes. More please. Fuck me. Faster.”
His hips battered her, and the hand at her back pinned her in place. Her breath pitched and a keening cry escaped as the flood of ecstasy swept over her. She jerked and arched her back under the onslaught of release. Pistoning against her ass, he thrust deep. He smacked one cheek, and her pussy muscles squeezed around his shaft. Hot cum poured inside her.
Their loud, guttural breathing filled the room.
His hands swept over her back. Her skin tingled. Having those hands and that body on her equaled heaven.
Too soon, he withdrew from her and stood. He eased her one leg, then the other, off the ottoman and helped her to her feet. Before she could say a word, he swept her up in his arms. Her head spun. Silent, he strode down the hall with her safe in his embrace. Gentle. Kind.
Damn, she loved him.
He entered the bedroom, laid her amongst the ruffled bedding, and eased in beside her. He covered them with a thin sheet and tucked her against his chest. Cuddling close, she searched his face, for what she couldn’t be sure. His green eyes shone in the flickering shadows of the oil-lamp on the dresser. He lowered his head, took her lips with his own. Longer, deeper, as if his mouth expressed emotions he couldn’t say out loud. He’d never kissed her that way before.
“Why do you keep coming back to me?” Ethan whispered, his forehead against hers.
Her heart stuttered, and tears pricked her lids. She gave a small shake of her head. She’d never tell him until she felt sure he reciprocated her feelings. He may want to have sex with her like a madman on speed, but he’d never fall for her. He didn’t want the happy-ever-after that she did. And she hated herself for settling for less, but she couldn’t walk away. Though she questioned her own decisions, when she knew a future with him didn’t exist, she couldn’t stop loving him. Her one addiction had a name. Ethan.
No twelve-step program existed to fix her. Until he began a forever with someone else, Shanay had to keep trying. She was helpless to do anything but love him and hope for a future she didn’t think would ever come.
No other man compared to the one lying beside her. If the rare times like these were all she would ever have, she had a lot of lonely years ahead. But she would do it of her own free will.
Many career driven, strong women she knew would ridicule her for the choices she made. However, when it came to matters of the heart, she had very little willpower to fight against what mattered to her body and soul.
She laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes. “Let’s just sleep a while.”
His arms wrapped around her, and pulled her close. As his breathing eased, she drifted.
She’d hold onto him for dear life.
As if it were the last time.
Ethan awoke, blinking against the sunlight pouring through the window beside the bed. What the hell?
Damn, the storm had stopped. He’d have to check for damage to the cabin. But not just yet. He wanted to spend more time in bed with the woman beside him.
He stretched and shifted to his right, searching for the body that should have rested beside him. Surprised to find the bed empty, he surveyed the room. Not seeing her, he pushed the blankets off and stood up. He grabbed a pair of boxers and stepped into them then headed toward the kitchen, sure he’d find her there.
He glanced around the empty room then at the living area. Strong sunlight filtered through the curtains. He couldn’t concentrate on that right now. His gaze swept the room further.
Blankets folded on the end of the couch, the mugs they used last night no longer on the coffee table…. The intangible knife to the heart was unexpected. She couldn’t be….
Her clothes in front of the fireplace…gone.
He cursed and moved toward the front door, heart pounding. The cool breeze washed over his bare skin as he leaned on the porch railing. The weather had cleared, but dampness clung to the grass and puddles lined the driveway.
Shanay was nowhere in sight.
Slamming into the house, he returned to the kitchen to grab his cell. He’d text her, beg her to return. With the storm cleared away, he had four full bars of service. When he hit the screen, a note popped up.
He stared at it for a few seconds, then read what she’d written again.
Ethan,
Don’t worry about me. I’ve called a tow truck and will meet them at my car.
I hope you’re feeling better. You should call your parents to ease their worries. I know our being together in the past has always been tumultuous and crazy, but please do know that I care about what happens to you. Nothing is worth shutting everyone who loves you out of your life. Problems come and go. It’s how you deal with them that shows how strong you are.
You need to get off this mountain and get your life back. Go back to work.
Oh, and please know that I didn’t mean to pry, but your phone kept vibrating this morning as I made coffee. You missed over a dozen messages from Alicia. Read the last one. It’s the most important…at least to me.
I’ll see you when I see you.
Shanay
He glared down at his phone then scrolled through the messages from his partner. When he came to the nineteenth, he stopped.
Ethan, damn it. I wish you’d answer me. Listen, Isabella needs to talk to you. It’s important. She wants to reconcile your differences. Brady wants to see you, too. Text me. Let me know when you’ll be back and talk to her.
Setting the phone on the counter, he read the message again. He waited for the seething anger and resentment to come at seeing Isabella’s name, but it no longer seemed to matter. All he could think was that Shanay had the wrong impression. She didn’t know his past with Isabella and had to assume they had a relationship and would reconcile.
He blew out a shuddering breath and growled.
Waking up without her had been like a punch to the gut. In the past, he’d been the one who left her bed and regretted causing her such pain. To wake up without the one woman who’d been there for him countless times, someone who’d come to mean more to him than he’d realized….
She gave him more than he ever deserved. He’d always suspected she had deeper feelings for him, but she hadn’t brought it up, and he’d been too self-absorbed to do so. He owed her more than he could ever repay.
Grabbing his phone, he called up her name in his contact list and hit send. He listened to it ring at least a dozen times before he pressed end and slid it back on the counter.
Damn it. Whether she would ignore him or not, he couldn’t be sure. He wouldn’t blame her if she wanted nothing to do with him.
He moved into the bedroom and pulled clothes from the drawers.
She’d offered her heart, body, and soul to him. And he hadn’t taken care of the gifts she’d given. Never worshipped the woman who’d always been there for him.
Wild Thunder Page 2