by Lisa N. Paul
“Ry, I’m leaving in just a few hours and we won’t see each other until December. Please, make love to me. I know you want to romance me and make it special, but this is special. I love you and I want this so much. I…I…feel like I’m going to explode with want for you.”
His grin was equal parts loving and devilish, “Oh, Princess, I am gonna make you explode…again. Just hold on tight.” As he went to lower his head she stopped him, her desperate stare expressing the severity of her desire.
This time, he lifted up to his knees. “Baby, listen to me. If you think for one second that I don’t want to be with you then you’re out of your mind. I’ve been dying to sink into your sweet body since that first night we kissed in your parents’ pool. But you’re right, Ash, that would be sex, and while that’s gonna be fucking hot that’s not what I want for us.”
His eyes penetrated her as he continued, “At least not the first time. You may be a virgin but I’ve never had sex with a girl I loved before.” Ashley watched as Ryan’s face flushed.
“Ryan Baker, are you blushing?”
He ran his hands over his warm cheeks and shrugged his shoulders. “Look, I know you’re ready to take this to the next level—and trust me when I say I am too. But I love you, Ash. And, well, I guess I just want to wait until I know that we’ll have weeks or months to be able to explore this, once we finally do it. You know that I’ll give you anything. I’ll give you everything. I’ll even do as you ask—right here, right now—if that’s what you want, but I’m asking you to wait until December. It doesn’t have to be your birthday. We can do it the night I get home. But there’s just no way that I…I can finally claim you that way and then watch you get on a plane and…and leave me.”
Ashley actually felt a weight sitting on her chest. The guy who was always so smooth with the words, so quick with the comeback, was actually stumbling through his appeal. How could she turn down that request? How could she say no to that magnificent plea?
“Okay, Romeo, let’s wait. But only until the night you get home though because after that little speech, I want you even more. God, I think I almost came…again!”
“Well, Princess, I think we both know I have no problems making that happen.” Ryan shifted his weight and lowered his head, but Ashley squeezed her thighs together, preventing him from moving any further.
“Honey…” The hesitation in her voice was there but she pushed it back, hiding it underneath her bravado. “During my blow job inquiries I read about something else.”
His questioning gaze set off butterflies in her belly. She shrugged before saying, “And since we’re kind of pressed for time, why don’t I show you want I learned? We can kill two birds with one stone.”
Ryan’s brows lifted in question but it was his sexy smirk that had the butterflies taking flight in the pit of Ashley’s belly. It was one thing to read about things of this nature, but it was something completely different when suggesting them to the most devastatingly handsome man she ever met. Collecting her nerve, she pulled in a lungful of air and took a leap of faith.
“Lay on your back, Ry.” She climbed astride his broad body and faced his feet. Bending down to suck on his long, hard shaft, she nestled her core back up to his lips. The deep groan that left Ryan’s mouth assured her that he liked her suggestion. Even more so, the way that he feasted on her assured her that she had read all the right books.
Wrapping her arms and legs around him like a monkey climbing a tree, Ashley hugged Leo with all her strength. “I love you, sis.” His body shook with laughter as he placed huge kisses on the top of her head. “Hey, Ash, I’m having a hard time breathing.” He faked breathlessness as he struggled to put her down.
“Leo, I hate leaving you. I hate it.”
As she feigned her tantrum Leo turned to Ryan and said, “Always been so damn stubborn, my sister. Look how she acts when you try to take her favorite toy away.”
The two men laughed as Ashley pouted. Leo swept her into another hug and kissed her head again. She loved this gesture—a gesture that was solely Leo’s. When he did it she felt alive, needed, loved, and never alone.
When he replied, “Ash, I hate leaving you too. I do,” she knew that he wasn’t just paying her lip service. Their relationship was the strongest bond either of them had ever made and being apart was just as painful for him as it was for her. They’d already decided that he would move to whatever state she went to for college. If the band became popular he would be traveling a lot, but he wanted his home base to be wherever she was.
“This tour is only seven more weeks. We’ll talk every day and before you know it, I’ll be home.” His smile deepened when he jabbed Ryan in the chest. “I’ll even bring this guy with me.”
“Yeah, like you could keep me away,” Ryan muttered, his mouth turned up in a sexy grin. “My turn, man. You may wanna go check on your sister’s flight or something because this here will melt your eyeballs.”
“My cue to leave. Call me when you land, sis. I love you.” Leo turned away quickly but not quick enough to hide his huge grin.
“Come closer, Princess.” Their bodies pressed tightly together, she could feel his heart beat pounding through his clothes. His scent surrounded her as she buried her nose into his chest and inhaled deeply. He immersed his face in her hair, “I love how you always smell like sunshine and coconuts, Ash. Everywhere you are is home to me.” God, how could those words not undo her?
“I’ll miss you the most of all, Scarecrow,” she joked referencing her favorite childhood movie, The Wizard of Oz, just before pressing her lips to his. “But, honestly, Ryan, walking away from you just feels wrong. It makes me sad inside.”
The smile faded from her face and the beautiful glow from their sexy morning together had gone dim. She no longer felt warm and cozy. Leaving Ryan and her brother left her feeling hollow and cold. “I know it’s just seven more weeks, but it feels like an eternity.”
“You know, if business school doesn’t work out, you could always try your hand at acting. You’ve got drama all figured out, Princess.” She knew what he was doing. His pasted on smile didn’t reach his eyes and his grip tightened just a little bit more. She loved that he was trying to lighten the mood even though she could see that their separation was painful for him as well.
“Yeah, well, you should definitely keep your day job, Romeo, because your acting skills suck.” Ryan smiled warmly as he squeezed Ashley tighter.
“Alright, Ash, your gate is all the way at the other end of the airport, so you better go. Call me when you land. I love you, babe.”
“Bye Ry,” she blew him a kiss, threw her backpack over her shoulder and headed to her plane.
Had she known how long it would be before she got to hold him in her arms again, she would have held on just a little longer, but she didn’t. She let go.
Stubbornness Works Both Ways
“DUDE, IF I had a camera, I could ruin you right now,” Leo teased, not even trying to contain his laughter. Ryan’s face must have displayed his confusion because Leo explained, “You are so whipped. And look, as her brother, I am so fucking happy that she found a great guy. But as your best friend, you look like a love sick puppy!”
Ryan couldn’t help but to release the laughter he’d tried to hold in. Leo was a call ‘em as you see ‘em kind of guy. It was one of the reasons why they’d remained so close for so long. That was also one of the reasons Ryan had felt comfortable approaching Leo about his feelings for Ashley. He’d known that good or bad, Leo would give it to him straight. There would be no game playing about Leo’s best friend and his sister dating.
“Do I look that fucked up, man?”
“Worse,” Leo admitted. “Let’s go Ry, I think it’s time we had a little chat about you and my baby sister.” Ryan cringed at the look on his best friend’s face as they instructed the taxi to take them back to their tour bus.
The bus was empty when they arrived. Jayson and Zane had taken the day to visit Zane’s f
amily in a town about an hour north so Ryan knew they had plenty of time to talk candidly without being interrupted.
“So, here’s the deal, buddy,” Leo started, setting two beers on the small Formica table in the dining section of the bus. “I get that things between you and Ash are serious—”
“Leo,” Ryan went to interrupt but the way Leo lifted his hand and closed his eyes told Ryan loud and clear that this conversation would be one-sided for a little while.
“Man, you’re my best friend. I love you like a brother. But. She. Is. My. Sister.” Leo emphasized each word. He hadn’t needed to. Ryan knew how much Ashley meant to him. He sat in silence, waiting for Leo to continue. “I would walk through fire for that girl. Do you understand?” When Ryan opened his mouth, Leo’s don’t interrupt me stare had Ryan closing his mouth and nodding his head without ever letting sound escape.
Taking a long pull of his beer, Leo closed his eyes in what appeared to be contemplative thought. “I don’t know what you two have done, but I know what you haven’t…done. I know you’ve been a perfect gentleman, while she”—color rose in Leo’s cheeks—“has tested your willpower.”
Shifting his glance to the floor, Ryan allowed himself to exhale the breath he’d been holding. He loved Leo like a brother but until that moment he hadn’t realized how important it was that Leo really trusted him with Ashley. He pulled his eyes back up and met his friend’s stare.
“I know you love her, Ry, I do. But, you wounded her with that shit you pulled this weekend. Before you ask, yes, she told me about it.” Leo cringed. “Thank God she spared me the full details, but I got the highlights. Dude, how could you accuse her of being with someone else? How fucked up is that shit? You and me, we’ve discussed this. I thought I’d finally got through to you. Scott James is not an issue, man. YOU ARE THE ISSUE!” He said as he slammed his hand down loudly on the table, jostling the beer bottles.
Ryan couldn’t stop himself from interrupting. “Leo, you have no idea. I’m the one that hears Jayson talking to Scott on the phone. From the sounds of it, Scott is into her. Like really into her. And he’s making his play. Did you know that they spend a lot of time together, both in school and out? I’m sorry, but I don’t trust him any further than I can throw him.”
“Look at yourself. Look at your hands.”
Ryan looked down to see white knuckles and protruding veins. He could feel the bite of his fingernails as they dug into the palms of his hands. The realization had him unclenching his fists, slowly releasing the tension. “Ryan, she came to me before we left on tour and asked me how she could compete with the women who would be throwing themselves at you and I told her that you loved her and that she needed to step back and trust you to make the right choices.”
“I am! I haven’t so much as looked at another girl, you know that, Leo! What are you accusing me of?” His heart thumped in his chest as his breathing quickened.
Calm eyes surveyed his face as Leo watched Ryan intently before saying quietly, “Nothing. I’m not accusing you of anything…and neither is Ashley. Do you understand?”
Inhaling, Ryan stared back at Leo unable to form a response. Did he understand? Yeah, he understood. He’d been a complete asshole. He was the one making all of the accusations while Ashley sat back and trusted him blindly. Scrubbing his hands over his face, he tried to wipe away the idiotic persona that had taken over his body.
“Do you think she’ll ever truly forgive me?” He whispered. Fear froze the air in his lungs, making it almost impossible for him to speak any louder.
Taking a couple more pulls from his beer before answering, Leo smiled brightly at Ryan. “So, here’s the thing about Ashley.” He drained his beer and set the bottle aside with a clink. “You know she is as stubborn as a goddamn mule?”
“Yeah, I think I may have experienced that side of her a time or two,” Ryan huffed although Leo’s relaxed face helped to lighten the mood.
“Well, with my sister stubbornness works both ways.” Leo chuckled. “Dude, promise me you’ll never play poker. Your face shows all of your emotions and you have no idea what I’m even saying. Stubborn works both ways, Ry. When Ashley is angry she’s angry with everything she has. But when she loves…well, that girl loves the same way. Why do you think she always forgives our sorry excuses for parents? She’s too fucking stubborn to give up on them. Once someone is really truly in her heart, they will live there forever. Now, that doesn’t give you the right to fuck with her. Because, best friend or not, you only get so many chances to screw up before I kill you. But, I think you guys are meant to be. So get your head out of your ass and stop worrying about things that don’t matter. We clear?”
Ryan nodded. “Crystal.” Sitting up straight in the chair, Ryan rubbed his palms over his jean clad legs, stared at Leo and nodded, “You just do me a favor and tell Jayson to keep his fucking mouth shut when it comes to Ashley?”
“You think I didn’t already take care of that? Ryan, she’s my baby sister.” The growl in Leo’s voice was not to be mistaken. “I politely explained that if he ever disrespected her in any way, ever again, he’d have to learn how to play bass with his toes.”
Even though they both laughed at Leo’s comment, Ryan knew that Leo was in no way joking, and he guessed that Jayson probably knew it as well.
…As a Friend
“HEY, ASH, WAIT up.” Ashley heard footsteps behind her as Scott quickened his pace to reach her just as she was leaving the high school and heading for the parking lot. “I can’t believe we’re heading into another hurricane. Jesus, this is one of the worst seasons I can remember.”
He wasn’t wrong. They’d had ten hurricanes and tropical storms that year in Florida—eight of them major. It was the last week in October and the season should have been winding down but according to the Weather Channel it was set to get worse. It looked like October and even November might be filled with tropical storms and hurricanes.
Yuck. Ashley hated being home alone in her big house when the violent weather hit. While she knew she should be used to the creaky sounds the old house made when the winds hit the siding and the leaves on the trees blew angrily, she’d never gotten over her fear of being whipped away by the gale force winds, or drowned by the surge of angry water.
She’d seen so much devastation as a result of the hurricanes over the years and since big storms meant big damage, her parents usually rode out the storms at the hospital, waiting for victims to be brought in. When she and Leo were young, they had nannies and caretakers watching over them. Once they were old enough it had been just the two of them, holding on to each other, waiting for the driving rains and wicked winds to pass.
This season, it had been just her in the house. Alone. On the nights that Leo’s band wasn’t performing, he’d stayed on the phone with her, whispering comforting words in her ear, and then she’d return the favor if and when storms had hit wherever he was on the coast. They weren’t physically together, but they weren’t worlds apart. She warmed at the thought, completely forgetting that Scott was walking by her side.
“You’re shivering, Ash. Do you want my jacket?” She could see the sincerity in his eyes and watched as he slid out of his rain slicker. “We can’t have you getting sick. You have a long shift at the restaurant tonight and don’t forget you’re covering for me tomorrow,” he said with a grin.
“Thanks for the jacket, Scott.” She pulled the sides closer together and quickened her steps to move closer to her car. “I’ll see you in a few minutes over at the restaurant.”
“You know, Ash, on the days we’re both working, we really should just drive over together.”
His suggestion sounded logical but she knew that it would look bad to anyone that cared to look into it. So she just shrugged her shoulders and got into her car. The sky was a deep gray and thick low clouds sat in wait, ready to crack under the pressure of the water tucked away inside of them. She quickly called Ryan’s cell phone as she walked through the kitchen to the sta
ff room, and frowned when his voice mail picked up.
“Hi, honey, I’m heading into work and just wanted to call and tell you that I love you. I can’t believe it’s been over a week since I last kissed you. I miss you. Call me after your show. Bye.”
Turning her phone on vibrate, she put her things in her locker and got ready for her shift. Standing by the mirror, she swept her long golden tresses up into a messy bun and fastened it with a clip.
“Your hair always smells like the beach,” Scott whispered into her ear from behind her, sending a gasp whooshing from her body. She hadn’t even noticed him standing there until he’d spoken. Placing his hand on her shoulder, he rubbed his thumb lightly along her shoulder blade. “Shh, calm down Ash, I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just putting my stuff away and I saw you standing here and, well, you just looked so damn pretty.”
“Scott—”
“No, just give me a second, Ash. We’ve been friends forever and I know you have a boyfriend and all, but he’s never around. Storm Front is doing really well. Who knows what will happen with them and where that will eventually leave you. Can’t you just give me a chance? I’m here and I care about you. I know I can make you happy.” He looked so genuine—so sweet—but Ashley only wanted one person, and it wasn’t Scott James.
“Scott, I adore you…as a friend. You know that. But, I’m in love with Ryan and I always will be. He holds my heart and soul. I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you because you’re right, we’ve been friends forever and I’d like to keep it that way. Okay?”
“Sure, Ash, no problem. I’d never have forgiven myself if I hadn’t tried though.”
She could see the defeat in his warm green eyes and she felt bad for her friend, but the only thing she could offer him—or any other guy for that matter—was friendship. Her heart had already been given to someone and she had a feeling that she was never getting it back.