“Shouldn’t they… I don’t know…” I trailed off, at a loss for what to say. Surely they didn’t think it was safe for us to go back to our house.
“They basically have the attitude that this was a warning. He kept asking if any of us were involved with anyone associated with drugs.” Taylor shook her head in disbelief.
“That’s crazy.” I breathed in deep.
“You guys can stay with me. I don’t want you going back there,” Josh said quickly, and by his tone, it didn’t really sound like a suggestion.
“I was thinking of getting a hotel, but Laney is fighting me on it. She’s saying no one is going to keep her out of her own home.” I could see the anxiety in Taylor’s face and that set panic rising in my chest. Taylor was supposed to be the unbothered one, the one who always had everything under control. “Will you try and talk some sense into her? The window’s broken, and the front door is kicked in… what if they—”
“Come back,” I finished for her. “Yeah, I’ll come talk to her.”
She gave me a sad smile, and then her attention turned to Josh. “I see you’re over being a broody asshole?” She mustered a real smile when he put his hands up in mock surrender before she headed back inside
“I’ll come by your house after I stop home,” he said, cupping my face in his palms, studying my features with an expression I couldn’t read.
“Everything okay?” I asked, but he pulled me into him, wrapping me in his arms and tucking my head under his chin.
“It will be, Addie,” he said softly. “I’m going to make sure you’re safe, no matter what.” He leaned back slightly to look at me again before pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“Well, well, well,” Jeff said as he exited the hospital like he owned the place. “My wife, with my snake of a cousin.” His hat was back on, and he popped another piece of gum in his mouth and shook his head in mock disappointment. “I trusted you guys.” His dry tone made me smile.
“Thanks again,” I said, glancing between them. “I’m gonna head up and see what's going on. But I’ll see you later.” The fact that Josh was willing to come over and check the house over made me feel hopeful that everything would be okay.
“Of course,” Josh said, pressing a chaste kiss to my lips and waiting for me to get safely inside the electric doors before he and Jeff walked toward his truck.
Chapter Eighteen
It turned out that Jeff was some sort of home improvement savant. By the time I got back from picking up Laney’s prescription, the window had already been replaced, and Jeff was cussing as he knelt at the front door. He was jiggling the door handle that the police broke.
“Screwdriver,” he ordered Josh, who hovered at his side, like a little boy watching his dad working on a car. “Not that kind, I need a flathead.”
Josh stooped down to fish through the beat up tool box, and when he looked up at me through his dark wild hair, it felt like the air was sucked right out of my lungs. He could do that by just looking at me with those sea green eyes and flashing a sheepish smile.
“Holy shit, man.” Jeff flailed his arms. “Ya got all night to ogle your girlfriend. Help me out here,” he complained as he held the two sides of the new doorknob in place.
Girlfriend. I’d never been in a relationship before, and I didn’t consider myself a romantic person at all. I was logical, and most love stories were fabricated to make them seem more deep and romantic than they actually were—like those Hallmark movies I loved to pick apart. But the way I reacted to Josh, the way he looked at me, and the way his skin flushed at the word ‘girlfriend’ made my heart soar in a way that I’d never expected, especially given the events of the last day and night.
I squeezed by Jeff and carried the bags of groceries I’d picked up while I was waiting for Laney’s medicine into the house. Taylor smiled up at me from the couch where she was cocooned and flipping through a novel. Laney was in the recliner with a scowl on her bruised face. I grimaced at the purple and red splotchy skin around her nose and set the bags down on the coffee table.
“How’re you feeling?” I didn’t know what else to say. Laney looked rough, and it wasn’t just because of the swollen planes of her face. Her brown eyes were filled with absolute disgust. I could understand why, I mean, to go through what she did and have the police just say that it must’ve been a botched break-in and they would “look into it” had to be infuriating. The vulnerability I felt in the aftermath couldn’t compare to what she was going through.
I sat down on the edge of the coffee table and began rummaging through the bags.
After I set her medication to the side, I pulled out the pack of Starburst candies and offered them to her. “I know they’re your favorite.” I smiled, but it quickly faded when she glared at me.
“No, thanks.” She looked away, her jaw trembling, and I wasn’t sure if she was going to start yelling or crying.
“They're going to find who did this,” Taylor said from behind me on the couch.
“It’s not that.” There wasn’t any less venom in Laney’s tone.
“What’s wrong, then? Did I do something to upset you?” I asked, moving to kneel next to the recliner, forcing her to look at me. I couldn’t think of anything I could have done to hurt her feelings, but Laney was extremely sensitive.
“No.” She averted her eyes. “Yes.” She sighed. “No.”
“I’m gonna need more than that.” I tried to keep my voice light as I looked back at Taylor to see if she knew what was going on.
“I called my parents,” Laney said finally, and her brown eyes were brimming with angry, unshed tears. “You know what my dad said?”
My stomach twisted. I didn’t have parents to disappoint me, but it seemed like that’s all Laney’s did.
“He said if I won’t let them come here to check me over or I won’t come home, they’re not giving me any money to go get a manicure and pedicure. They know what I’ve been through and how much stress I’m under right now.” I nodded slowly, knowing I couldn’t say that both of those stipulations seemed really reasonable, and she was lucky she had parents who cared about her safety. Taylor hadn’t even been able to reach her parents even though she tried several times. Laney shifted, struggling to sit up straight in the recliner. When I reached out to help her, she yanked her arm away from mine.
“Lane…” Taylor said, coming to stand next to me. I knew she could sense the brewing explosion.
“I’m the one who was attacked. I’m the one who got my face bashed in, and my body sliced on broken glass.” Laney was crying at this point, angrily pointing at us. “And you two, you’re the ones being doted on by Jeff and Josh. Nothing even happened to you!” She sucked in a sharp breath and wiped the tears that streamed down over her top lip.
How did I go about apologizing for something like that? I didn’t even know what was going on with Josh and me, and I didn’t call him to tell him about the incident. Part of me felt like saying that this wasn’t my fault and that she couldn’t be mad at me for having a relationship, however ambiguous that term might be in our case. But the other part of me knew Laney and knew how much she had to be hurting, and that she was jealous. We all had our issues.
Before I could say anything, she continued, “You’re getting all the attention, and I went through all of this for nothing. You don’t even want a boyfriend. You’re happy running around with your old dogs and turning guys down just because you can.” She glared at me, over to Taylor, and then back at me. “What’s so fucking special about the two of you?”
My eyes stung, not from the insult, but rather the mention of Remi. I still needed to go over to Dr. Alexander’s and pick her up so I could bury her. Dr. Alexander always kept them overnight afterward, and I’d pick them up the next day. I rubbed my face tiredly. So much happened in the last twenty-four hours that I wasn’t sure I could handle much more.
“Lane. Calm down.” Taylor tried to put a hand on her shoulder, but she jerked away.
&
nbsp; “No. Just leave me alone,” Laney sneered. “I try so hard, and no one ever cares. No one ever gives a shit.” She pushed up out of the chair, turning to look back at us once she was in the hallway. “You’re too stupid to even see the way Josh looks at you.” And with that parting shot, she was padding slowly down the hall toward her bedroom.
“Well, that was awkward,” Jeff said. Taylor and I spun around to see Jeff and Josh in the entrance to the living room. Josh’s eyes were extremely sympathetic, and I knew I must’ve looked a wreck because he was looking at me with such compassion. Complete and utter exasperation filled Jeff’s voice when he added, “Is there somethin’ in the fuckin’ water tower in this town? Everyone’s either crying or a fuckin’ lunatic.”
He shook his head before pointing toward the foyer. “Fixed it. Nobody’s getting through the front door now.” Jeff had no filter, and the way he switched topics made me wonder what it would be like to be in his brain for a day.
“Wow, that was fast,” Taylor said genuinely, and I couldn’t help but smile. Jeff looked so proud of his work and delighted that Taylor had noticed.
Jeff grinned, rubbing his hands together and then elbowed Josh in the ribs when he realized he was still looking at me. “It’s not polite to stare, jackass.”
Josh playfully shoved him back and gave me a lopsided smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “We were going to check the locks on the windows if that’s okay,” Josh said, picking up the rusted red tool box. Jeff had already started walking toward the kitchen like a man on a mission.
“That would be wonderful,” I said, almost formally. It felt awkward interacting with Josh in front of people. I was used to the hushed tones, heated glances, and feverish kisses. I felt like I connected with him so much more deeply than I could convey to Taylor. She knew I hadn’t known him long, and I didn’t think she would understand how I could have such a deep, comfortable connection with someone I barely knew.
“Taylor can show you guys around. I have to run out for a bit…” I looked to Taylor, who nodded her approval before I turned back to Josh. His brow furrowed, and it reminded me of the first time I’d seen him.
“Where are you going?” His tone wasn’t gentle, and it made my pulse jump.
“Dr. Alexander’s.” I didn’t bother to tell him to watch his tone because I was too exhausted to have another argument. I grabbed my keys off the coffee table and turned to Taylor. “Laney needs to take her medicine around six. I should be finished by then, and I’ll grab some pizzas for dinner on my way home.”
“None of that deep-dish nonsense, okay?” I heard Jeff call from the kitchen, and the way Taylor stuck her tongue out in his general direction made me smile.
“Might as well be a casserole, right?” I called back.
“That’s what I’m sayin’!”
I moved past Josh, but he caught me around the waist, pulling me back to him, and I looked up, trying to remind myself that it was okay to lean on him.
Wordlessly, Taylor disappeared into the kitchen, leaving us alone.
“I need to pick up Remi so I can bury her.” Josh’s expression softened at the emotion in my voice.
“I’m coming with you.” He hugged me closer, my back pressing into his chest, and I knew he was waiting for me to agree.
“I’ll be fine—“ I said, mostly out of habit.
“After what happened? If you think I’m letting you out of my sight—” he cut himself off, and took a deep breath, visibly trying to calm himself before he continued. “What if they were trying to hurt you? What if whoever did that to Laney is just waiting to…” he trailed off, his arms tightening around me.
He was right. My gut told me that this hadn’t been some sort of botched robbery. Laney didn’t have any real enemies, the guys she’d fallen out with only wanted space from her. If it were Ryan, he would have only been after Taylor. That left me. I’d been hiding for most of my life, and it felt like it was finally catching up to me.
I handed Josh the keys to my car in surrender. A feeling of momentary peace washed over me as he linked his fingers with mine and led me out the door.
Chapter Nineteen
Josh dug most of Remi’s final resting place. Taylor and Laney knew about this spot, but Josh was the only person I’d ever brought here. Dr. Alexander was kind enough to allow me to use a part of her 102-acre farm to give them a peaceful resting place since I didn’t have any land of my own. It was a little bit of a hike past the big red horse barn and out through the cow pastures, where there were several rescued dairy cows that were too old to produce milk and would have otherwise been euthanized, and probably not in a humane way.
We were in a wooded area near the pond. I used my hands to push the cold dirt on top of the sealed box that held Remi and her glow worm. Josh followed suit, dropping the shovel. We didn’t speak, but we didn’t need to, and I found myself thinking that I was thankful I had someone to share this with. He swiped the wooden marker with ‘Remi Sue’ painted in mint green to match her collar and dug it into the head of the grave. I smiled. Dr. Alexander never forgot a detail.
“There's so many,” he finally said, sitting down next to me and wiping his dirty palms on his jeans.
“Seven.” I nodded, not looking up from the white card Dr. Alexander handed me when we picked up Remi. “She gives me one of these every time to remember them.” I showed him the black ink paw print that belonged to Remi, and a tear rolled down my cheek. He reached out and caught the tear before it could fall.
“Will you tell me about them?” He pulled me over to sit sideways on his lap, and I burrowed my tear-streaked face against his neck.
“What do you want to know?” I tucked the paw print inside the pocket of my hoodie. Then despite my fingers being cold, I chose to keep my hands out and wrapped around his bicep. Just the feel of his muscle moving under my fingertips calmed me.
“All of it,” he breathed against my ear, squeezing me to his chest. “I want to know everything,” he murmured, his hand soothing through my hair.
I pulled back to look up at him for a long moment, so lost in his eyes that I didn’t even know where to begin. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the apples of each of my cheeks and a final one on my nose.
“But right now, you’re freezing, and it’s starting to get dark,” he said softly, helping me to stand up.
As we trekked back toward his truck, he held my hand and slowed his long strides to match my shorter ones. When I was sliding in the passenger side of his truck, he held the door, watching as I buckled my seatbelt.
“You owe me some stories when we get back.”
“You owe me a couple, too.” I tilted my head as if to challenge him.
When we finally headed down the lane, I found the courage to look at his profile and ask, “What changed between us?”
One hand on the steering wheel, his eyes snapped to mine, and the sadness swirling in them all but slapped me in the face.
“Why do you ask that?” He cleared his throat, reaching over with his right hand, palm grabbing my thigh in that possessive way he had about him. The possessiveness that should have scared me, should have been a red flag waving wildly in my face, but instead it made me feel like I was seeing a part of him that not many other people had. I felt treasured by him, like he was going out of his way to share parts of himself that he’d rather keep under the surface.
I unbuckled my seatbelt when he tugged on my leg, indicating he wanted me to scoot over in the middle of the bench seat next to him. I wasn’t sure how to say what I was thinking, so I leaned my head on his shoulder, breathing him in as his arm went around my side, holding me flush against him.
“You just confuse me,” I finally said. “Actually, I confuse me too. I mean, I’d be the first one to tell me that you’re a bad idea.” My laugh was derisive, and there was silence before I whispered, “But you don’t feel like a bad idea.”
I felt his shoulder unbunch and relax, but he didn’t respond. He wasn’t stupi
d; I’m sure he knew how his actions and words were all over the spectrum and rarely overlapped.
“I’m sorry for the way I treated you,” he finally said as we pulled to a stop at the one light in town. “Okay. I’m sorry for some of it,” he clarified with no hint of a smile or humor.
I tilted my head to look up at him as he stared out at the setting sun.
“I’m sorry for pushing you away. I’m sorry for acting like I could go a damn hour without wondering what you were doing.” His jaw clenched, and the light changed.
“Why did you push me away?” I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, and at that moment, I couldn’t even scold myself at how pathetic I sounded. He was ruggedly beautiful, so open and vulnerable—I wanted to etch this moment in my mind so I would never forget the way he made me feel just by existing.
As I watched, a dark, angry veil seemed to mask his features, but as quickly as it appeared, it was gone. His hand slid down my ribcage, to rest at the swell of my hip. His fingers gripped, pulling me closer as if he wanted to keep me there forever. It was clear he wasn’t going to answer my question now, but I could be patient. I knew how hard it was to open up, and I respected his need for time. He had to have his reasons, so I decided to let it go for tonight.
We drove the rest of the way in silence, but as we pulled in my driveway, I couldn't help but pose a different question.
“You said you were sorry for some of it. Which part aren’t you sorry for?”
He shifted into park and swiftly tilted my chin up to kiss my lips, and he breathed in like he was breathing me in. His hands cupped my jaw on one side and my neck on the other, controlling the kiss, and I loved every second.
Pulling away, and taking my breath with him, he whispered between chaste pecks on my swollen lips. “I’m not sorry for kissing you, for wanting you, for showing you why you belong with me.” His thumb brushed my bottom lip, and then he swept a few hairs that escaped my ponytail away from my face. “I didn’t believe in this, the way you make me feel, until I found you.” His voice and its tone, which he seemed to save just for me, made me want to melt into his arms. My entire life had taught me it wasn’t smart to put so much faith in someone who had the ability to crush me so easily, but with Josh, I didn’t really have a choice. There was a gravitational pull between us, inexorably drawing us together, and before I even realized it, Josh had become like oxygen to me—an element I couldn’t exist without.
Beautiful Legend: An Angsty College Romance Page 11