by Kristen Cobb
“When I control the mortal and immortal worlds you will bow to me and beg for the life of your son.” There was actual fury in Declan’s eyes now. Kaelan apparently poked at a sore spot.
“The son I have never met? Why would I care? Do you have any idea how many children I have produced?” Kaelan waved his hand through the air dismissively. “One more or less is irrelevant.”
“Then why are you here? Your presence proves that you care about him.” Declan seemed quite certain about his assessment, a bit of the smirk returning.
“My presence here has nothing to do with the man everyone claims is my son.” Kaelan stood up, walking over to the bed. “I am merely here to extend the courtesy of informing you that I will be bonding with Nessa. This plan of yours will not bear the fruit you wish. I should actually thank you. If you had not abducted the man they say is my son Nessa and I might never have met.” Kaelan leaned down close to Declan. “Did you honestly think I would allow an opportunity like this to pass. There has never been a female ancient. Can you imagine how powerful she and I will be?” Kaelan’s taunting voice cooed in Declan’s ear, barely above a whisper.
Rage was the only word that could accurately describe Declan’s reaction. His breathing deepened, nostrils flared, blue eyes burning with hatred. Eventually he seemed to manage some measure of control. “She will never agree to it. From what I hear she would do anything for Conri.” Declan unleashed his barely controlled fury at her. “I will kill him if you bond with Kaelan.”
“How would you get there without me following you?” At least now she knew where they all stood. Declan had no intention of releasing Conri. He spoke of making Kaelan beg for Conri’s life even after bonding with her. Giving in to Declan’s demands would not save her husband.
“So you do care about him?” A supremely confident grin slowly spread across Declan’s face with an evil intensity that sent chills down her spine.
Nessa decided to support Kaelan’s strategy, assuming it to be nothing more than a ploy to manipulate Declan. That could be sorted out later. “I adore bedding Kaelan’s son and would like to see him returned but if that is not possible I will be forced to move on. Conri does not wish to bond with me so I see no reason to refuse Kaelan’s offer. I am certain in time I will find other suitable…distractions. I cannot imagine Kaelan would expect me to be faithful for eternity. That is wildly unreasonable.”
“Assuming I am afforded the same latitude I have no issue with that.” Kaelan strode over to the door but turned around rather than open it. “I will leave it up to you when we kill him.”
Nessa pretended to consider the matter for a moment. “A week. I think we should give it a week. By then we will have bonded. If the outcast still refuses to give up this ridiculous plan I will make certain he is quite dead.” Nessa knew calling Declan an outcast would stir the man’s anger on a profoundly deep level.
Declan’s jaw clenched, the only sign her statement bothered him.
“As you wish.” Kaelan opened the door, gallantly motioning for her to leave first.
Nessa smiled sweetly at Kaelan before strolling over to the door.
After an intimate dinner with Kaelan in Conri’s bedchamber Nessa decided to broach a topic that made her ever so slightly nervous. “When you told Declan you did not care about Conri and intended to bond with me, you were lying?” She did not actually know Kaelan well. What if he really wanted to bond with her out of a desire to become more powerful? Her last hope for finding Conri would vanish like the morning dew beneath a burning sun.
“Of course. You are little more than a child and in love with my son. Threatening Declan is unlikely to have any effect. Convincing him this plan has no chance of working is the only other logical tactic. My hope is that he realizes the futility of his plan to bond with you and reveals Conri’s location in exchange for his life.”
“And if he does not?” She had no faith at all in the possibility that Declan would abandon his chosen course of action.
“The people I have sent out will find something. Men like Declan leave a trail of misery wherever they go. We will track down his cohorts. They are no different than Declan.” Kaelan refilled his goblet with ale, motioning toward her with the pitcher.
“No, thank you.” Nessa considered Kaelan’s statement, seriously worried about Conri at this point. “How badly do you think they are mistreating him?”
A long drawn out silence answered her question before Kaelan uttered a single word. “It does not help that I am his father. They are outcasts who were cast out from the outcasts, by me. Declan and his friends are a very angry group of men, feeling slighted by the entire world.”
“And they will take it out on Conri.” Kaelan stopped just short of stating it outright. They were quite likely torturing Conri for the sheer enjoyment of it. The thought knotted her insides into a tight ball of pain and dread. The blame for Conri’s situation fell completely on her shoulders. That knowledge caused a nearly paralyzing physical reaction. Never again would she allow someone to harm Conri. No sacrifice would be too great in the effort to protect him from the risk her love created.
“Yes. Be prepared for the worst when we find him.” The sympathy in Kaelan’s gaze made the situation all too real, his certainty that Conri would be in grave condition nearly her undoing.
Nessa stood and walked over to the bed, grabbing a couple of blankets she turned to Kaelan. “I am heading up to the roof. It is your son’s favorite place to sleep. You may come if you like.” Being up on the roof might help her feel closer to Conri.
By the time she opened the door Kaelan stood silently behind her. They climbed the stone steps all the way to the top. Pushing open the heavy wooden trap door Nessa stepped out into the cool night air, looking up at the stars.
Striding over to the wall where she spent the night with Conri she laid out one of the blankets. Taking off her sword Nessa set it down on the edge of the blanket. Sitting down and leaning back against the wall she set the other blanket down within reach.
Kaelan lowered himself to the stone roof next to her. “Etain said my son was forced to beg for food and sleep outside. Is that true?”
“Yes.” As a rule she would never reveal private details about Conri to anyone but this seemed to be an exception. Kaelan might never meet his son. “Your son never slept in a bed until after we met. Occasionally a kind family would allow him to sleep in a barn or somewhere on their land. Most simply ran him off if they found him. Your son has not known much love in his life.”
“I cannot believe Etain allowed that to happen, denying my son the chance to know his father and have a stable home.” Pain blended with anger in Kaelan’s voice. Etain’s actions hurt Kaelan and her son deeply.
“I felt rather angry about that at first myself.” She had been fully prepared to despise Conri’s mother.
“And now?” Kaelan glanced at her, mildly surprised.
She did not hate Etain. The reason took a moment to sort out in her mind. She should hate the woman. Etain’s choices wounded her son almost beyond repair in some ways. Conri was a good man despite his mother, not because of her. “You spoke of Declan not being able to escape the shadow of his mother. That is exactly what happened to Etain. Ciaran controls everyone around him. Etain believed Conri had been sent to you, unaware he was wandering homeless, Ciaran’s doing, not Etain’s. She mistakenly trusted her father and followed his orders blindly. I do not believe she will ever be so foolish again. Etain is well aware of his treachery now. I think you should tell her about Ciaran killing the other ancients.”
“I will not be forgiving her as easily as you have. The fact that all of the shifters support casting out their own children is unconscionable. The children are told to keep walking until they reach the end of the river. For most the small amount of food they are given runs out before they reach me. When they do reach the end of the river they have no idea if my home is what their parents and the elders were talking about, the instructions are so vagu
e. They are tired, hungry and all alone. I need to have someone on watch at all times to spot them since the elders cannot even be bothered to send them with an escort. Etain should have brought Conri to me herself. Her self-centered cowardice could have destroyed my son. It is nothing short of a miracle that he has become a decent human being. He could easily have turned into a monster to rival Declan’s evil tendencies.” Kaelan’s tirade revealed a long held, deep-seated anger.
“If not for you they would all end up in Conri’s situation.” Although the shifters threatened Kaelan’s life to the point that he became a recluse he still took in their discarded children. Nessa had nothing but respect for the man seated next to her. Very few people would be capable of such selfless compassion.
“Which is exactly what used to happen before I built my home on the shores of Killala and sent word to the elders that I would take in their unwanted children.” Kaelan looked off into the distance trying to diffuse some of his anger.
Something occurred to her as they talked about the shifters and children being cast out. Kaelan had been surprisingly unaware that Ciaran was Etain’s father, rather odd to say the least. Etain implied that she flew to Killala quite a few times. How could a man so paranoid about the elders wanting to murder him be so careless? “How is it that you were unaware of Ciaran’s relationship to Etain? You do not seem to me a man that would neglect to question a shifter who suddenly appeared on your balcony. Did you two ever talk?”
Kaelan sighed. Nessa could almost see him rolling his eyes in the darkness. “There was something about her. I have no other explanation than that. Call it a moment of weakness. And no, we did not do much talking. A naked, beautiful woman appeared on my balcony looking at me with complete adoration. Talking was the last thing on my mind.”
“Did you love her?” A rather personal question but she could not contain her curiosity about this man who had likely been alive for well over a thousand years yet seemed almost completely alone.
“We had sex, lots and lots of sex. I never bothered to get to know her. She would show up. We would have sex, sometimes more than once. Then she would leave.” Kaelan leaned back against the crenelated stonewall. “When did you know you loved my son?”
Nessa thought back, realizing it happened right here in this spot. “We were sitting here getting ready to go to sleep. I fought against the attraction I felt for him, afraid I would only betray him in the end. He sustained a minor injury that day on the practice field. I took his shirt off to check the wound. He gave me another one of those ridiculous commands, telling me to either give him his shirt back or come closer and keep him warm. That was the moment I stopped fighting, deciding to risk everything for love.”
“Do you regret it?” Kaelan watched her closely in the moonlight with a keen curiosity.
Kaelan posed a difficult question to answer under the circumstances. Her love put Conri’s life in considerable and possibly unending danger. She could only imagine how much he might wind up hating her for being the cause of all this, for allowing him to languish in the hands of his captors, not to mention any physical torment. “No, although I should. I suppose that makes me selfish.”
“Because of what is going on right now?” Kaelan sat up away from the wall, turning to face her.
“It is because of me that your son’s life is in serious jeopardy, because they know I love him. If I had simply stayed away from him none of this would be happening.”
“Things happen exactly as they are meant to. There is a reason for all of this. Nothing is random.” Kaelan sounded so certain.
Believing this is how their lives were meant to play out did not make it any less painful. “I keep thinking that if I really loved him I would bond with Declan but logic tells me that is not a good long term solution. I feel like the worst wife in the world, sitting around trying to decide what to do while my husband is in danger.”
“You are far from the worst wife in the world. I consider my son lucky to have someone so devoted.”
“It does not seem to be helping him at the moment.” Flailing in a sea of helplessness created an all-consuming frustration with no relief. Kaelan’s kind attempt to console her did little to alleviate that burden.
“From where I sit you have done quite a bit. You brought his mother and father together to help search for him, no small accomplishment. I have people out seeking information on Declan and his followers. We are doing all we can.” Kaelan laid his hand over hers. “We will find him.”
Nessa picked up the blanket, pulling it over her body to ward off the chilly night air, torn between wanting to scream and cry. More than anything she wanted Conri here, holding her, making love under the stars. How could she possibly live her life without him? Breaking Conri’s heart and leaving him would be the most difficult task ever laid before her.
Kaelan shook his head when she offered him some of the blanket. “I have a feeling you could use some time alone.” Kaelan stood to leave. “We will head back to Killala first thing in the morning. Try and get some sleep.”
Nessa watched Kaelan walk over to the hatch and open it, disappearing down into the stairwell. Being on the tower roof helped her feel closer to Conri. Closing her eyes Nessa tried to send him her love for strength, begging him to hang on. It was all she could do at the moment.
5
They spent two days travelling back to Killala by horse, an unfortunate necessity because she needed clothing. Kaelan swore he had men and women out searching for information that would help them find Conri. After being back for a full day she had done absolutely nothing to find her husband.
Her private chamber resembled Kaelan’s, complete with a balcony and a hearth. Spacious and comfortable with an enormous bed and a table that could seat four Rory would be jealous. Lying on the bed listening to the waves crash against the shore Nessa sighed deeply. Conri should be here experiencing this with her. The realization that he might never get to meet his father hit hard, causing tears to well in her eyes. She absolutely refused to cry again. Enough sitting around bemoaning Conri’s unjust fate. Nessa jumped off the bed, striding purposefully toward the door.
“I will wait no longer.” She threw open the chamber door with such force it slammed against the stonewall with a loud crack, flying back at her. Halting the door’s progress with her hand she kicked it shut with her foot.
There appeared to be three levels to the structure. This particular chamber was located on the second floor. Glancing up and down the hall she spotted a wide staircase leading down to the lower level.
The entire structure seemed to be hewn from the bluish grey stone of the cliff, even the floor she currently strolled across. Yesterday she remained locked away in her room, refusing to explore Kaelan’s home or speak to anyone, mired in despair. Conri could ill afford her to wallow in grief and sadness. No longer would she follow Kaelan’s directive to be patient.
The enormous stone staircase could accommodate three large people walking side by side down its grand length. Running her hand along the smooth stone of the handrail she marveled at the workmanship involved in creating such a masterpiece. Reaching the bottom she could hear the clang of steel swords coming from whatever room lie just beyond the alcove to her right. Walking quietly toward the wide passageway Nessa glanced into the room, Kaelan’s great hall.
She stood silently in the alcove, taking in the scene before her. The room itself appeared to be carved out of the same bluish-grey stone as the rest of the castle. She decided to call it a castle for lack of a better term. It was grander than anything she had ever personally set eyes on. Even Henry Plantagenet’s castle in Normandy could not compare to Kaelan’s home. There were columns scattered throughout the room. A large hearth set into the outer wall burned brightly with a peat fire. Candles in iron candelabras adorned every wall, illuminating the room with a soft light.
Kaelan sat at the end of a wooden bench, his legs stretched out, watching two men fight with swords. They utilized the empty space in f
ront of the hearth, and real swords, the clang of metal on metal a welcome sound.
The room, while quite large, still had a warm, cozy feel. At least twenty tables with wooden benches were scattered throughout the hall. Each table could probably seat ten large men comfortably. There was no need for rushes on the floor. The stone of the cliff lay beneath her feet, somehow hewn to a smooth finish.
Kaelan and the two men fighting were the sole occupants of the hall. One table was set with four wooden plates, four metal goblets, a few platters of food, and three metal pitchers, as if anticipating her arrival.
The two men continued fighting as she walked into the hall. Not only were they practicing with real swords they appeared to be actively attempting to wound each other, putting as much strength behind each blow as possible.
The man currently facing her wore no shirt. A sheen of sweat glistened on his upper body, a rather magnificent upper body. He did not have the same bulk as Conri, more of a lean heavily defined muscle, the very image of Kaelan in that sense. Nessa thought back to the sight of Kaelan standing naked in Rory’s bedchamber, shaking her head to clear the unwanted image. Her eyes followed the grace of the man’s movements as he effortlessly held off his opponent.
Nessa watched him fight while quietly walking into the room. The man now commanding her focus possessed shoulder length blonde hair and striking features, the firelight casting his almost ethereal beauty in otherworldly shadows. She could not seem to tear her eyes away from him as she strode ever closer.
The unnaturally beautiful man slammed his sword down onto his opponent’s from above and finally noticed her. When he smiled her heart nearly stopped. Something about him left her speechless. She could see his eyes now, an extraordinarily light blue.
Kaelan and the beautiful man’s opponent looked her way when they noticed the disturbingly handsome warrior’s distraction. She wore the altered version of men’s clothing that Marta created for her, this particular outfit so deep a blue it appeared almost black. The sword with the green ball embedded in the hilt was strapped to her back, dagger in the pocket on her thigh. What would they think of her appearance?