by Kristen Cobb
Every night Conri brought a bowl of whatever meat they served at the evening meal. Once she finished all of the meat he would pour some water into the bowl from the flask in case she wanted a drink during the night, the elaborately engraved flask Conor gave her. She purposely asked the guard who retrieved her belongings from Conri’s chamber to leave that particular item in his storage trunk, hoping he would use it. Very few people possessed such an extravagance.
Every morning after her husband left the tower roof to begin his day she would fly over the area to make certain all was as it should be then sit in the oak tree by the training field to wait for him. Conri always brought a sac of meat to the training field now. Every once in a while he would hold out his arm to her. Landing gently, trying not to scratch him with her talons, she would gobble morsels of meat from his hand. Every now and again she would fly down to the river for a drink, always returning without delay to watch over him.
While she greedily devoured some delectable roast pig Conri sat down next to her on one of the blankets. “Well my friend, we are going on a siege. Feel free to come with me if you like. We are headed to Dublin to oust the foreigners. What would you do without me? Do you even know how to hunt anymore?”
She screeched in answer between bites of meat making Conri laugh.
Dermot died shortly after Conor’s execution, leaving control of Leinster to the Norman, Richard deClare. Conri relayed the entire disastrous chain of events to her the day he found out, furious over what he considered Dermot’s traitorous conduct. Apparently Rory now realized what a mistake he made killing Conor. Dermot’s son would have held a legitimate claim to the kingship of Leinster. Many of the lesser kings would have supported Conor. They trusted and respected him. Unfortunately remorse could not change the past.
Conri ran a hand gently down the feathers on her back. “I have never seen a hawk so tame. It makes me think you belong to someone. My wife would have said you cannot own another living creature.”
She stopped eating and watched him for a moment. He seemed so sad, staring off into the distance.
“I miss her, even though she publicly humiliated me. No one ever truly loved me before. Plenty of women want me in their bed but that is not nearly the same thing.”
Quickly eating the last morsels of meat she hopped over to him, laying her head on his thigh.
Conri stroked her once then leaned back against the crenelated wall surrounding the tower roof. “I imagined taking her with me on campaigns, having her curled up against me to banish the cold of night, fighting beside her in battle. There are very few women willing to share that kind of life.”
Every word broke her heart. The temptation to change form and declare her love pulled at her very core but the desire to protect him proved stronger. Conri was slowly beginning to heal from her brutal rejection. The damage done by the kidnapping and torture still haunted him. The nightmares had not ceased. He still woke every night screaming in pain, a constant reminder of the reason she needed to remain out of his life.
“I suppose there is some consolation in the fact that she left him too.”
Conri seemed to have forgiven Rory. It was difficult to be certain because she rarely saw them together as she never went inside the castle. She based her assessment on the fact that Conri did not sound angry when he mentioned Rory. Each night he would tell her about his day before they went to sleep.
Conri looked into the wooden bowl. Finding it empty he picked up the flask, filling the bowl partway with water. After taking a drink he set the flask down on the stone rooftop.
Although certainly not the life she would have chosen it was infinitely better than never seeing him again or being left to wonder if he were safe.
When Conri picked up the second blanket she flew a short distance away, still remaining on the roof. Once the blanket lay draped over his body Nessa spread her wings and reached him with one strong hop and a small flap of her feathered appendages. Landing on his lap she snuggled into the warmth, grateful to be with the man she loved in any form.
12
A disturbing vision plagued her every waking moment and the timing could not be worse. She needed to warn Rory but they were on an interminable siege. Speaking to him would require changing back into human form. That posed a major problem.
Thankfully Conri did not sleep next to Rory’s tent. He chose a spot away from the clusters of men, likely because of the nightmares. She generally slept in the tree above him. Keeping the knowledge of her presence from Conri needed to be considered but it could not be the paramount concern in this instance.
Her vision entailed Rory being mortally wounded at this very siege. Over and over the scene played out in her mind. The trees were finally speaking to her again, saying something she did not wish to hear. In her vision Rory had just stepped out of the river, naked after bathing. Someone came running toward him shouting a warning that the foreigners were attacking. After bending down to pick up his clothing an arrow flew toward Rory as he stood, lodging in his stomach.
She might be able to heal him, might being a very important word in this instance. Even were she inclined to take her chances with Rory’s life and allow the situation to unfold without any interference Conri’s life would be in danger as well. Anything could happen if he were caught in the midst of a battle. If one of them were hurt she would be forced to reveal herself in order to save them. The more intelligent option seemed to be warning Rory of her vision in an attempt to avoid the situation altogether. Perhaps he could be persuaded to attack the foreigners in a preemptive strike.
She could not in good conscience ignore this vision. The trees were insistent, just as they had been about Conor’s execution. That told her one thing. The attack would happen, a depressing thought. What good were visions of the future if you could never change the outcome?
The plan at this point was relatively simple, fly into Rory’s tent during the night when most of the men would be sleeping. There were always at least two men awake guarding his tent but that could not be helped. On any given night there would also be men roaming the camp drinking. Sieges were fairly boring, a lot of sitting around waiting for something to happen. The short span of time just before dawn would be her best chance to sneak in and out undetected. By then most of them should have passed out. Return to human form just long enough to convince Rory her vision called for action then change back into the hawk with no one the wiser.
The risk to all of their lives outweighed the chance of Conri discovering her presence. Keeping this knowledge to herself was not an option. Rory’s death would plunge Ireland into an endless series of wars. Not small skirmishes but all out battles, smaller territorial kings all fighting each other to take Rory’s place. Add the fact that the foreign invaders would be defeating the high-king’s army, emboldening their confidence, and you had the potential for disaster.
She would simply have to hope she could get in and out of Rory’s tent with no one seeing or hearing her. She needed to remain awake to avoid sleeping late and missing her chance. It was going to be a long night.
“Conri.”
Conri cracked his eyes open just enough to peer at whoever had the audacity to wake him before the sun. What could possibly be so important? The offender proved to be Cluny, one of the men scheduled to guard Rory’s tent last night. Forcing his eyes open Conri stretched in an effort to wake up. “What is it Cluny. Has the king been murdered?”
“No, of course not.” The young man appeared horrified, apparently not seeing the humor in the question at all.
“Then what could possibly be so important that you would wake me before the sun has even risen?” Sighing, Conri stood up, knowing Cluny was unlikely to go away until he dealt with the problem.
“That hawk of yours flew into the king’s tent. If it wakes him he will have our heads. If we go in to try and catch it that will wake him. That thing will probably come to you without much fuss. We were hoping you could maybe…”
Conri hel
d up a hand to stop Cluny before he even finished speaking. “I will take care of it.” Quickly heading toward Rory’s tent a thought occurred to him. “Please tell me Rory is alone.” One never knew what they were walking into. He strode haplessly into Rory’s tent a few days ago and found two women eagerly pleasuring him.
“Just the king sir.” The much shorter Cluny struggled to keep up with his long strides.
“Excellent. It is much too early to be seeing any of the king’s entertainment.”
Cluny grinned, young enough to envy Rory’s sexual antics.
Thoughts of Nessa invaded Conri’s mind unbidden. He would take her over a bevy of camp followers any day. Remembering the last time they were together still caused a ripple of desire to course through his body. In his mind he could see Nessa removing her shirt in the darkened stable, saying I need you, still smell the hay and hear the whinny of the horses in their stalls. His shaft hardened immediately, slowing his stride. The woman still wielded power over him even though she’d been gone for months.
That woman could still be called his wife. He never bothered to have their marriage dissolved legally. Maybe it was time to consider officially ending their union. If Nessa were inclined to change her mind and come back to him she would have done so by now.
The relief on Kern’s face almost made him smile as he strode up to the tent. Walking straight through the closed flaps Conri stopped, completely paralyzed by the site before him. Nessa.
His wife sat on the edge of Rory’s bed, naked. Rory lie there awake, hands behind his head, equally naked but under the covers. Witnessing this kind of intimacy between them broke his heart into a thousand pieces, scattering them on the wind as he silently raged at the fate that brought them to this point. He could barely breathe, the sight of Nessa naked in Rory’s bed more than he could bear.
Nessa did not even notice his presence until she followed Rory’s distracted glance. At least his wife had the courtesy to appear mortified by their present situation.
Standing there, unable to move, his eyes looking into her stricken gaze, a thought occurred to him. Cluny had been absolutely positive Rory occupied his bed alone. What were the chances Nessa arrived during the very short period of time it took Cluny to come get him? Nearly impossible, especially since she was not even in the area as far as he knew. Kern most definitely would have warned him if his wife was in Rory’s bed. Both guards watched his hawk fly in here. Now Nessa suddenly sat perched on the edge of Rory’s bed, naked, exactly how she would be if she had just changed form. Glancing around the tent Conri did not see the hawk anywhere. It could not possibly have escaped without Kern noticing. The only way out for a bird of that size would be the flaps at the entrance.
Nessa and the hawk were one and the same. He knew it with a certainty that set his heart to beating again, she never really left him. Why would his wife pretend to toss him aside only to follow him around as a bird? The hawk appeared the first night they returned to Rory’s castle. That meant his wife never spent so much as one night in his friend’s bed. The only night the hawk failed to make an appearance on the tower roof was the night Nessa spent in Conor’s room. They were both lying to him.
There seemed little sense in asking either Rory or Nessa for the truth. They’d both been lying to him for months. He knew exactly where to go for answers but first he intended to make his lying wife squirm a bit.
Finally tearing her eyes from him, realizing she was naked, Nessa ran to the storage trunk at the foot of Rory’s bed. Rummaging through the contents she quickly found what appeared to be her own clothing.
Watching her dress Conri felt absolutely stunned by the depth of their deception. Rory clearly knew Nessa was the hawk. What other excuse could there be for keeping her clothing at the ready with his own? Nessa supposedly left months ago, never to return.
“What are you doing here wife?” He emphasized the word wife with a less than complimentary tone.
Still barefoot but finally dressed she stood at the foot of Rory’s bed staring at him. “I had a vision and felt compelled to warn Rory.”
Throwing back the blankets Rory hopped out of bed. Walking over to the trunk he gently pushed Nessa out of his way. “She thinks the foreigners are going to attack, which I have already told her is not possible. They are on the verge of surrender.”
One thing Conri did have faith in was Nessa’s visions. She knew about Conor’s execution long before anyone else even thought it a possibility. Hostages were never executed, even when a treaty was broken. Seriously maimed yes, but never executed.
“What have you seen?” He considered walking closer to his wife but could not seem to make his feet move.
Nessa looked away at nothing, as if watching it play out in her mind. “I see Rory, naked by the river after bathing. An arrow pierces him here.” Nessa motioned toward the lower portion of her stomach.
Rory slipped a red tunic over his head. After pulling on a pair of dark red pants he strode over to the tent flaps barefoot, sticking his head outside. “Have some food brought to me. I need enough for three.” Knowing his orders would be followed without question Rory walked back over to Nessa. “I will be fine. The foreigners are not going to attack. There is nothing to worry about.” Rory took Nessa’s hand in his own. “I am however grateful for your concern. Does this mean you have forgiven me for Conor’s execution?”
Nessa was actually looking at him rather than Rory. “Yes. I could never stay mad at you. I love you.”
“Does that mean you are staying?” Rory brought her hand to his lips.
“It seems I have no choice.” A silent plea from his wife’s eyes implored him to realize she loved him, completely ignoring Rory’s attempt at reconciliation.
Not once had Nessa even glanced at her supposed lover. She was not in love with Rory, probably never had been. He suddenly knew it with a certainty that reminded him of Nessa with her visions. Even with no actual proof he knew it to be true.
Again he wondered why she would enact such an elaborate scheme. “I will prepare the men as best I can but without knowing exactly when the attack will occur there is very little I can do. Our best option would be to go on the offensive and attack first.” The wound she described would be fatal for Rory. Unfortunately knowing the future did not always mean you could change the outcome.
Rory shook his head. “I see no reason for such drastic action at this time.”
Disappointment evident on his wife’s face she sighed deeply. “I will stay and do what I can.”
“To save the man you love?” He almost choked on the words, wondering what she would say.
“Always.” Nessa said the word with so much emotion he ceased breathing for an instant. Her eyes never left his. Rory might as well not even be in the tent with them for all she seemed to care about his presence.
That incredible warmth only she could create flooded through him. She loved him, not Rory. His wife’s loyalty had never wavered. He could see it in her eyes.
Without another word he strode from the tent on a mission. Will and Ronan likely knew exactly what was going on, and he knew where they usually slept. The two were nearly inseparable.
Thoughts of Nessa consumed his mind as he barreled through the camp in search of her two accomplices. If his brother and Will were aware of his wife’s deception that meant they all played him for a fool. Why would Nessa tear his heart out if she still loved him? Had she stopped loving him but now changed her mind? Maybe she regretted her decision to leave him. He immediately realized that line of thinking made absolutely no sense whatsoever. She never actually shared Rory’s bed.
His mind continued running in circles, unsure which direction led to the truth. His frustration boiled over the instant he spied Ronan and Will lying next to each other, sleeping soundly as the sun began peeking over the horizon. The fact that they were far from alone provided a bit of a problem. Hundreds of men lie on the ground around the deceitful duo.
Conri kicked Ronan then Will in
the side, a bit harder than necessary out of a need to vent his frustration. “Get up. I need a word, in private.”
Ronan threw an arm over his eyes as if intending to ignore the command. “Can this wait? It is far too early to be dealing with your…”
Conri kicked Ronan even harder in the side, certain to leave an angry bruise. “Now.”
Ronan jumped to his feet, blue eyes glaring intently, indicating a readiness to fight if necessary. “What is your problem brother?”
Conri matched Ronan’s anger with his own. “You have all been lying to me and I would know why.” He glanced down at Will, now wide awake, appearing extremely guilty. “You can follow me by choice or I can drag you both away after I beat you bloody. Your choice.”
Conri turned and headed toward the edge of camp where he knew they could have some degree of privacy. This would undoubtedly be a conversation that needed to remain private. Thankfully Will and Ronan followed along beside him without any further argument.
Once they reached a relatively deserted spot Conri wasted no time getting to the point. “Why has my wife been following me around as a hawk? Why did she lie about being with Rory?” Conri stalked closer to Will, knowing he would be the first one to crack. “And why have you been keeping it from me?”
Ronan stepped in front of Will. “That makes no sense. Why would Nessa be following you around as a bird when she clearly left you for another man.”
“Stop lying to me or we are going to have a problem.” Conri moved closer to his brother, more than ready to punch him in the face if one of them did not start talking.
“I cannot keep doing this. He deserves to know the truth.”
Ronan turned on Will. “Keep your mouth shut. Do not ruin what she put in place.”
Will moved out from behind Ronan, clearly struggling with the decision.
Conri decided to try a different tactic. “Please, my wife has obviously been lying to me for months. The wondering will likely be worse than the truth.”
Will continued to stare at him, on the verge of giving in.